The Daily Dad

When our kids mess up we say: Aren’t you a little old for that? And we have all sorts of rules of thumb for what things are age appropriate or not—what age they should stop having accidents, what age they should stop throwing a tantrum just because they’re tired, what age it stops being okay for other people to have to pick up after them.

You’re too old to act this way. It’s time to grow up.

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It’s strange. The things we’re upset about–with our spouses, with our children, with our siblings. They feel like they matter so much in the moment. With time or distance though, these feelings always fade. And what’s left when we’ve acted on them? When we let them get the better of us in the moment?

Sheepishness. Regret. Damage that cannot be undone.

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It’s the moment we dread. Our son is dating someone we know is bad for them. Our daughter is about to change college majors and throw away years of work. Our toddler has started biting or hitting or shouting some curse words.

We have to think about correcting behavior as nudging our children, not forcing them. We have to persuade, not overpower.

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On this weekend episode of The Daily Dad Ryan talks about being an "activity addict" and how he and his wife balance knowing when it's time to just rest.

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You want to raise kids who aren’t entitled. Who are self-sufficient. Who are decent and kind, part of the solutions not the problems of the world and of their generation. Successful or struggling, you want your kids to be generous. With their time, with their money, with their talents.

Rather than let the Black Friday spirit of materialism and selfishness infect us, let us contribute to something bigger than ourselves. Let us be good Stoics today, just head over to dailystoic.com/feeding—together we can contribute a small amount to help fight a big problem.

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Today and always we should be grateful. To choose resentment or envy, bitterness or fear, anxiety or anger–because your flight was delayed? Because your band teacher is a jerk? Because your marriage fell apart? This is to spit in the face of so many people who have so much less.

Gratitude, always. That is the way.

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We are thankful today and every day for all of you. Thank you for being a part of the Daily Dad community!

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Pretty much every parent wants to raise kids who turn out to be good people. So it's important to show them that moral excellence is what matters. That being a good person is not just what you pay lip service to, but what you are always thinking about.

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We sweat so much. Whether we’re on our phone too much, when we could (and should) be playing with our kids. Whether their lunch yesterday was perfect. Whether we attend every dance recital and graduation. Whether we’re doing enough. Whether they’ll hate us forever for not letting them go to this school trip or that sleepover. Whether they’re scarred forever because we lost our temper or forgot something they needed or couldn’t afford something they wanted because everyone else has one.

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Your son failed a test. He hit his brother. Your daughter forgot to do her homework. She scratched your car and lied about it. They are acting insane and you need it to stop. You just desperately want them to grasp the stakes of what’s happening.

So you yell. You threaten timeout. You threaten to ground them. You don’t hold back. But it doesn’t work. Of course, it doesn’t work.

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On this weekend episode of The Daily Dad Ryan riffs about how he handled his kids outgrowing their stroller and his clever way to get them excited about exercising.

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