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We talked recently about this choice we have as parents–about what we choose to see. Just like everyone has the choice to see the cup as half full or half empty, as parents we have a lot of power over the lens that we bring to each parenting situation, each crisis, each potential frustration.
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Any parent can tell you, the maddest they ever got at your kids is not because they did something to pissed you off or hurt your feelings. It was because they scared you. By running away in a parking lot. By getting caught with some dangerous drugs. By not coming home at curfew. By playing with something you told them they could never touch without an adult present.
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We must take two seemingly contradictory facts seriously at the same time. The first is that many parents are way too risk averse, overwhelmed by anxieties and worries about incredibly rare or unlikely dangers. The second is that, to paraphrase the writer Morgan Housel, things that never happen, happen all the time.
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On this weekend's episode Ryan shares his youngest son's reaction to his book making the New York Times Best Seller list, diving into what kids truly care about when it comes to your role as a parent.
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We live in a world awash with ego. We see it every day. We can see the ego of our boss, and how it has turned the office against them. We can see ego in politicians and professional athletes. We can see it in our kid’s teacher, perhaps, when they get in some pissing match with another parent or are threatened by a precious student. As they get older, we can even see ego in our own kids—thinking they can ace a test without studying or advance in sports without practicing.
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In 2021, in the midst of a terrible storm that not only killed hundreds of Texans but left millions without power, U.S. Senator Ted Cruz fled the state for the warmer weather of Mexico. It was, of course, a shameful abdication of leadership and responsibility that surprised absolutely no one who knows anything about Ted Cruz, especially members of his own party. If that wasn’t enough, Cruz would then break another cardinal rule of parenting: He threw his kids under the bus, trying to make the whole thing sound like it was his young daughters’ idea.
📕 Ryan Holiday's new book "Discipline Is Destiny" is out now! We’ve extended the pre-order bonuses for the next week—among them is a signed and numbered page from the original manuscript of the book. You can learn more about those and how to receive them over at Dailystoic.com/preorder.
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We would love for our kids to be perfect. To not just be born with ten fingers and ten toes, but flawless genetics and impeccable luck so nothing bad ever happens to them, so they are never sick and never in pain. However, the inevitable is true: everyone has something.
📕 Ryan Holiday's new book "Discipline Is Destiny" is out now! We’ve extended the pre-order bonuses for the next week—among them is a signed and numbered page from the original manuscript of the book. You can learn more about those and how to receive them over at Dailystoic.com/preorder.
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The story of George Washington and the cherry tree is not a true one. It is also, as we’ve written here before, not a story whose moral is about lying. It’s actually about the complex relationship between a parent and a child, one where the child trusts the parent enough to tell the truth, even when they have done wrong, and a parent who respects their child enough not to punish this kind of honesty.
📕 Ryan Holiday's new book "Discipline Is Destiny" is out now! We’ve extended the pre-order bonuses for the next week—among them is a signed and numbered page from the original manuscript of the book. You can learn more about those and how to receive them over at Dailystoic.com/preorder.
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There’s so much we don’t control as parents. We don’t control what’s happening in the world. We don’t control what our kids are going through. We don’t even really control what they do–not as much as we’d like to think anyway. But the one thing we do control, the Stoics would say, is how we choose to look at things. We choose what handle we grab in each situation, the story we tell ourselves about it.
📕 Ryan Holiday's new book "Discipline Is Destiny" is out now! We’ve extended the pre-order bonuses for the next week—among them is a signed and numbered page from the original manuscript of the book. You can learn more about those and how to receive them over at Dailystoic.com/preorder.
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Daily Dad on Staying Present with the Kids When Traveling for Work
Ryan talks to his friend and writing partner Nils Parker about the impact traveling for work can have on the relationship with your kids and spouse.
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