Can you meditate with a narcissist or someone with narcissistic traits in your divorce? Although you might see it as a waste of time, there is actually some good that can come out of it even if you don’t settle.  Our experienced accredited mediator and also experienced family law specialist will guide you through how you can make your mediation for family law matters (like property or parenting) work for you. Learn some strategies and steps you can take if you are dealing with someone who has narcissistic traits. Don’t waste your precious chance to settle or find out more about your ex’s plans. Listen to this episode today and get your agenda and strategies sorted. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

After Mediation Episode

FDR Mediation or Conciliation Conferences Episode

Convincing the Unconvincable Episode

 Can you really mediate with a narcissist? Mediation and Negotiation Tips when divorcing an ex with narcissistic behaviours

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• What might surprise you at a mediation with a narcissist

• Why you think you know what your ex is thinking is a mistake for mediation

• Why it's a bad idea to assume your ex thinks like you leading up to mediation.

• When you understand what they care about you can have success in mediation

• What is the shuttle process?

• Why the shuttle process helps in mediation with a narcissist

• How you can ask the mediator to help you with the narcissistic attacks during the mediation. 

• How to let your mediator know about their behaviour

• The three things a narcissist will care most about in their agreement with you.

• Does it matter if the mediator knows they are narcissists?

• How you can use the mediation to help tailor your affidavit for trial

• The cat and mouse game sometimes used in mediation by a narcissist

• How to avoid the game playing in mediation with a narcissist

• Which issue do you deal with first in mediation with a narcissist?

• Can you make suggestions to the mediator?

• How to agree on the agenda for the day

• How to make sure your narcissistic ex doesn’t run the agenda for the day.

• Why you should avoid using the word narcissist when going through family court unless they are officially diagnosed. 

• What should you do to show to the mediator or the judge that  your ex has narcissistic behaviours?

• How to “rebrand” your offer in negotiation so that your narcissistic ex will agree to it. 

• Do’s and Don’ts of mediation with a narcissist 

• Why you need to be mentally fit to get the most out of the mediation.

• What is the current mediation success rate?

• Is the family court full of narcissists? 

• Why taking proof and documentation to a mediation is a good idea.

• What the mediator will do to help you in a mediation with a narcissist

• Is a shuttle process a good idea with a narcissist?

• How to be aware of old patterns and how to stay out of them during negotiations with your ex.

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Are you getting frustrated because your ex is delaying everything? Or has nothing happened for ages to sort out your property and children's issues after you separated from your ex? Are you worried because it might be a delay tactic for some reason? You might be right. Delays can be strategic for parenting matters, domestic violence matters and property matters.  In this episode take a look at the pitfalls of falling for delay tactics and letting things drag. Discover ways you can overcome these delays in the three different stages of divorce or de facto separation process. Learn from an accredited family law specialist about delay tactics that happen from right at the beginning whilst still living under the same roof, to the strategies used whilst in mediation and negotiation all the way up to delay tactics during court. No matter what personality type you have in divorce you may be faced with delay tactics. This can be frustrating when you are trying to move things forward. Listen to this episode so you can get on with your life even when your ex doesn't seem to want to. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Costs & Calderbank Offers 

How to Divorce a Statue 

Delay Tactics in Divorce: How to counter them & How it can affect your Property, Children's & Domestic Violence matters.

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• What are delay tactics

• When do delay tactics cause problems

• Tactically how do delays help your ex during divorce?

• Section 117c of the family law act and why you need to know about it?

• The family law act and updates coming 

• How to cope with living under one roof and they are delaying

• Can a judge send someone to jail in the federal circuit and family court of australia?

• Some of the worst delay tactics a family law expert has seen 

• What happens if your ex starts dragging the chain 

• How to deal with centrelink during delays

• How to protect your state of mind during the delay tactics

• What happens if your ex won't disclose?

• What happens if your ex wants to delay so they can spend the cash before you start proceedings?

• What is the waiting period to get divorced?

• What is the property settlement deadline for de facto separation

• What is the property settlement deadline for divorced couples?

• What is a no fault divorce in Australia

• What incentives does your ex have to stall everything after separation?

• Do delay tactics help in parenting matters?

• What kind of delay tactics do you watch out for in parenting and children’s matters

• Do delay tactics cause problems in domestic violence matters?

• What happens if your ex pretends they don’t get your letters?

• What happens if your ex says let's deal with this all after christmas?

• What can you do if you are trying to get the matter moving along and your ex doesn’t want to?

• What about if they delay mediation?

• What happens if they delay disclosure in mediation?

• What is the central practice direction and the obligation to respond to your letters?

• Why putting in a time and date that you expect a response helps with delays.

• Tips on writing letters to people who are delaying doing something to move your divorce forward.

• What is a default judgement and how you can get it if your ex just won't lift a finger.

• Can you be financially compensated if your ex is delaying everything

• What are the cost implications of delay tactics?

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Can you do your divorce, property settlement and parenting matters on a budget? How do you keep your costs down on this journey? How much should you try to do yourself? What should you save your dollars on and what should you spend your dollars on? In this episode we walk you through the whole process from separation to final trial including before you even think about court and explore what you can do on the cheap and what you can do yourself? Can you do a lot of the property and parenting agreements yourself. We walk you through each step of the divorce or de facto separation journey and look at what you can save your dollars on and what you shouldn’t skimp on. We also discuss the pro’s and con’s of self representation in court. Also learn why mediation could be the best way to save your dollars and how to do it.

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Documentation Episode

How to stop your children from being used as chess pieces

When amicable goes wrong episode

Mediation Episode

Pre Action Procedures 

FDR Mediation Episode

Response to initiating application

What to expect in a trial

Documents mentioned in this Podcast Episode

CENTRAL PRACTICE DIRECTIONS

DIVORCE ON A BUDGET: How to negotiate, mediate and go to court on a shoestring

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• How to keep your costs down when going through divorce

• Can you do your divorce on a budget?

• Do you need a lawyer for divorce, childrens matters or property settlement?

• The risks of doing your divorce settlements without a lawyer

• How can you do a low cost mediation

• How are you charged for mediation

• How to keep your costs down by doing your own disclosure

• How is disclosure done?

• How much do lawyers charge for doing negotiations before court?

• How much do you have to spend on mediation?

• Can you do mediation without a lawyer?

• What is the most expensive part of a divorce

• How can you ensure that you keep your legal fees down whilst getting the best outcome for your divorce property settlement. 

• How seeing a psychologist can help you save money in your own divorce proceedings.

• How to get a mental health care plan during your divorce?

• Does a more expensive mediator give you a better outcome?

• Do fees equal expertise when it comes to mediators?

• How to choose a good mediation that will be worth the money that you pay.

• Is mediation a waste of time with a narcissist?

• Is mediation a waste of time with a manipulative or controlling ex?

• Best tips for keeping your mediation costs low.

• What mediation success rate is in general in Australia?

• When mediation happens too soon and why it might not work?

• The questions to ask yourself before deciding how much money to spend on mediators

• What to tell the judge if you can’t afford a lawyer

• What to tell the judge if you can’t afford mediation

• Can you do your own negotiations?

• Can you do the first court even on your own

• Can you be a self represented litigant for family court?

• What happens in the first court even and how much would it cost if you got a lawyer?

• How to get through a court event with your emotions intact.

• Type of people who might need a lawyer during court events.

• Things to say if you are self representing in the family court and you are overwhelmed?

• If you are trying to save money in the family court the pitfalls to watch out for if self representing?

• How to save yourself thousands during family court proceedings?

• What are submissions and when you might need to do them if you can’t afford to pay a mediator etc

• Can you do your court documents yourself?

• Can you negotiate a divorce settlement without a lawyer?

• What is the best way to keep your costs down in the family court?

• How to avoid the old “death by documents” legal bill

• Can you do a trial on your own

• The importance of Section 102na of the Family Law Act and family violence

• Are there strategies your ex’s lawyers may use on you and to be aware of if you are a self represented litigant ?

• Can you get legal aid to help you in the family court

• What does a duty lawyer do in Family Court?

• What is the best way to save money in your divorce?

• What is the easiest way to rack up your legal bill in a divorce.

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Learn simple ways that you can protect your children from becoming chess pieces in the family court or divorce proceedings. Sometimes ex’s change their idea of how much time they want to spend with the kids. These reasons could be genuine but sometimes it can be motivated by money. With these simple steps you can help protect your current arrangements for the children. Just in case in the future your divorce or de facto separation proceedings get nasty. Sometimes this includes wanting extra time with the kids so they get a bigger share of the property pool or finding out about child support and wanting to have more nights with the kids to reduce the child support amount. Explore this topic and learn about what happens if this gets to the family court and the best ways to protect you and your children before it comes to this. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Do I really need to respond to that? episode

The 12 Agreements Parenting Plan Guide episode

When amicable goes wrong episode

A simple way to protect your children from being used as chess pieces in your divorce or de facto separation

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• Is a parenting plan legally binding?

• What's the difference between consent orders and a parenting plan?

• How to protect your kids from becoming pawns in divorce proceedings.

• The court's view of parenting plans

• What people change their minds about time spent with the kids.

• When people decide to change time spent with the kids because of  child support

• When your ex wants to punish you by changing parenting arrangements with the kids.

• When your ex can get a new partner and then want new time.

• The presumption of equal shared care

• The family court and new rules coming.

• Assumptions of Fathers in the Family Court

• Assumptions of Mothers in the Family Court

• How to write a simple parenting plan

• How to word a simple parenting plan

• How to decide where the children spend time and when

• What happens if your ex all of a sudden wants to become parent of the year.

• How does a judge look at parenting plans

• What does a parent plan do for you in the legal system

• What to watch out for if your ex is using the kids as a pawn in the family court

• How to protect yourself from accusations of alienation

• Is parental alienation real?

• How to protect yourself from child support changes

• What other things you can do to protect yourself from potential fight in the family court

• What you should do if you don’t have a documented plan

• What if your ex says you are a bad parent

• What to look out for in actual divorce documents if you have a manipulative and controlling ex.

• How to protect the kids from post separation abuse

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

No matter where you are up to in the divorce or de facto separation journey, disclosure will be part of the process. Explore what it is, when you will need it, what it is used for and what happens if you or your ex don’t do it. This episode discusses disclosure for property settlement and childrens matters  in court, mediation and in negotiations. Explore what to do if you are feeling under pressure to provide too much disclosure and what to do if your ex isn’t providing enough. Learn about the process involved in looking at disclosure and what you can do yourself to keep your legal fees down. Learn about how to protect yourself if you are worried about your safety and disclosure. This episode comes with a handy downloadable guide click here to get it now —> GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE DISCLOSURE CHECKLIST GUIDE

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

DIY Disclosure Episode

Dirty Money Deeds Episode

Pre Action Procedures Episode

Disclosure: the what, why, when & how of disclosure for divorce or de facto separation.

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• What is disclosure?

• When do you need disclosure?

• How to avoid racking up legal bills with disclosure?

• Types of disclosure documents

• How to present disclosure?

• How do lawyers go through disclosure?

• How to keep disclosure relevant

• What happens if your ex doesn’t disclose?

• What happens if you don’t disclose?

• What will happen if disclosure isn’t done before mediation?

• What happens if they are asking for too much disclosure?

• How do you provide disclosure?

• Does your ex get to look at your disclosure?

• How do you ensure privacy with your disclosure?

• Can you redact some parts of your disclosure?

• What is the process of sharing disclosure?

• Do you keep having to provide disclosure?

• How do you keep your legal bill down with disclosure?

• How can be disclosure be used in the Family Court?

• What if you see lots of cash withdrawals in their bank disclosure?

• What to do if you find out something in their disclosure that matters?

• What you might say to their lawyer if you find something in disclosure?

• Can you do property settlement without disclosure?

• Will the family court allow you to do a settlement without disclosure?

• What happens if you know they don’t have anything to disclose?

• Should you sign anything without seeing their disclosure?

• Do mediators or judges look at disclosure?

• How to present disclosure findings to the judge or mediator?

• What if you are overwhelmed and don’t want to do disclosure?

• Things to look for in your ex’s disclosure?

• Can you refuse to do disclosure?

• What if your lawyer is asking you to provide too much disclosure?

• High conflict and disclosure

• Manipulative and controlling and disclosure

• Narcissists and disclosure

• Avoidant and disclosure

• Tax returns and Tax returns assessments and disclosure

• Superannuation and disclosure

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

How do you know what is important in your case? Sometimes events in your divorce journey may really upset you and you think they are important but in the end it doesn’t matter according to the family law act.  You need to know what things are not important so you can focus on the stuff that is. This helps you make sure your affidavits and documents for mediation are focusing on the important factors.  In this episode a family law accredited specialist is going to cover things you might not realise don’t actually matter in the court’s eyes. Plus a famliy lawyers insight into a few things that REALLY DO matter to Judges and Mediators.

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

If this information is distressing for you or if you need support in regard to sexual assault, domestic or family violence you can call 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 for 24/7 phone and online services. If you, a child, or another person is in immediate danger, call 000. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

DIY Disclosure Episode

Divorcing a Narcissist Episode

Surprising Issues that are irrelevant in divorce & separation proceedings. So you can focus all your efforts on the things your mediator, divorce lawyer or judge will actually care about. 

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On:

• Does cheating matter in the family court?

• Does it matter if they’ve got a new boyfriend or new girlfriend during the divorce process?

• Does it matter if the other person constantly gets the kids looked after by a babysitter?

• What is no fault divorce?

• What is the clause called “first right of refusal.”

• Different routines at each house does it matter in family court?

• The court expectations about parenting styles and what doesn't matter?

• Does the court care if you both can’t agree on ipad time, tv, bed times.

• What does the court think about the other parent being 10 mins late for pick up and drop off etc.

• The lazy as an argument for property settlement and what the court thinks about it.

• What happens if your ex hasn’t done anything to support the household or family?

• Does it matter if you did all the renovations on your joint owned house.

• Does it matter if your ex earns more than you in property settlement and divorce?

• If your ex brought more money into the marriage do they get more money after separation and divorce?

• Does it matter if the family business loses money and it wasn’t your fault?

• What happens if you had no idea what was going on in the family business?

• Does it matter if the family business goes downhill after separation and isn’t worth anything?

• What is a negative contribution and how does it work in divorce and property settlement?

• What about coercive control and power imbalances in property settlement.

• What happens if you don’t follow the judges directions?

• What happens if you don’t file documents in time for court or mediation?

• The Family Law Act Section 79 for marriages Section 60 for Child and Section 90 for Defacto

• If your ex doesn’t give you disclosure what happens?

• What is the judge's view on non-disclosure?

• What does the judge think of people lying in family court?

• What happens with a lying person in the witness box?

• The domestic violence pendulum during divorce negotiations

• What happens when you get hyper triggered during negotiations?

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Do you really have to respond to every false accusation or demanding message from a co parent during your divorce proceedings? This episode with a Family Law Specialist we cover the legal implications if you choose to respond and the ways in which you go about it. We share some easy guidelines to help you to decide for yourself. In this episode you also will learn the best co parenting communication hack of all time. Do you have to engage in every slinging match? If you have a narcissistic type ex, coparenting stops the grey rock method from working so how do you keep the drama in the box without being afraid of it coming back at you later in a legal context such as the family court? How do you cope with post separation abuse when it comes to coparenting communciation? We answer these questions and more.

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

If this information is distressing for you or if you need support in regard to sexual assault, domestic or family violence you can call 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 for 24/7 phone and online services. If you, a child, or another person is in immediate danger, call 000. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Post Separation Abuse Episode

Divorcing a narcissist in the family court

 Do I need to respond to that? When co parenting communication becomes tricky during divorce proceedings.

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• When to respond to false accusations 

• Why you should respond or not

• How to respond

• Should you ignore their messages of false accusations?

• How to bulk respond to co-parenting accusations ?

• Do you need to address it if you drop your kids later to school?

• Do you need to address it if you keep your kids home from school

• How to avoid the little traps set up by the manipulative coparent

• How to avoid the fights with the high conflict co parent

• How to bundle your responses to the coparent. 

• Co Parenting hack of the year if you are dealing with a manipulative or high conflict parent.

• How to create an or else situation with an avoidant coparent

• The things you need to consider when deciding how to respond to a co parent who is trying to have a fight or manipulate you.

• What is a guillotine order in family court?

• What happens if you don’t respond to a false accusation?

• What's the best way to shut down an argument?

• What if your ex keeps asking the same questions or wants to continue the argument?

• What to do if you think your ex is evidence gathering?

• What to do if you think your ex is just writing accusations to get your attention?

• Your mental health and coparenting with a manipulative and controlling ex.

• Narcissist and coparenting,

• Does having final orders change the approach you have to have with communication with a co parent or accusations by a co parent. 

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Untangling your finances. Your property settlement explained.

If you are looking to get separated or divorced but you have to untangle your finances and you are thinking “yikes.  that is a big knot to untangle”, then this is the episode for you. We will talk you through the overview of what happens and how to get your finances, mortgage, house, car, cash, furniture and super untangled. A perfect episode for you to know where you’re headed, how it works and how to make it happen. Also discover how to approach this phase based on the different divorce personality types you might be experiencing. This is based on Australian Law and is a general guide only.

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Divorce Limbo Episode

Financial Contributions Episode

Selling the house in divorce Episode

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• Why do you need to sort your property according to the family law act?

• What happens if you stay in divorce limbo?

• What are the consequences of never sorting out your property? 

• What happens in property settlement to the house?

• How to work out who gets to keep the house

• How to work out if you can afford to keep the house

• What if you can’t afford the mortgage?

• What does the court do if one wants to sell the house and the other wants to keep it?

• What happens to the money from the sale of the house?

• How do they work out what part of the assets you get to keep?

• How to figure out a payout amount for the house.

• How to figure out who gets the cash?

• What happens to the cars? How do you decide who gets which? 

• How do you get the car in your name?

• Do you have to sell the car?

• How to get a car valued.

• How to transfer the car into your name after a property settlement agreement has been filed.

• How to avoid stamp duty for transferring the car name during property settlement. 

• Who gets the furniture in property settlement?

• How does the court sort out furniture fights?

• How is superannuation sorted out in divorce?

• What superannuation cannot be split up?

• Would a court agree to giving one person all the cash and one person all the super?

• Self Managed Super Funds, what happens with these?

• What happens with Trusts in divorce and property settlement?

• Business valuations during divorce

• What happens if you are registered as part of a business that is involved in your property settlement.

• Tax implications for divorce property settlement.

• The process a lawyer takes when deciding what property goes to who after deciding on the percentage. 

• Manipulative and controlling ex partners and untangling your finances

• Amicable break up and property settlement tips.

• Avoidant divorce and property settlement.

• What to do if someone is dragging out the property settlement. 

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Learn the types of things you should document and how. Explore ways that you can easily document things and the legal pitfalls to avoid. Learn how good documenting can protect you from a manipulative controlling or high conflict ex if they ever take you to family court in the future. 

Explore why it is so important to document property and parenting issues and events moving forward. Why you should do it whether you are amicable or not with your ex. Why documenting things will help for parenting negotiations or a potential future custody battle in the family court. 

This episode also has a quick general guide of what you should document when you leave. Along with this handy checklist below.

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Documents mentioned

Financial Statement (form) | Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Financial Contributions Episode

What to do before you leave podcast episode

The importance of record keeping during divorce: the what, why, when and how to help you in mediation, family court or even just in negotiations 

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• Why record keeping is important 

• When should you start record keeping 

• Why you should record keep during separation

• Why is documenting important in parenting negotiations?

• Why you should keep records during the divorce process.

• Why record keeping in property settlement process is important. 

• What's the difference between a diary entry and a memory in court proceedings

• How to prove your word against your ex in court

• Why documenting is important to help with proving domestic violence and coercive control. 

• How to keep track of who has the kids and when. 

• What type of proof works in family court and why

• Why documenting the separation date is so important in de facto marriage. 

• What is disclosure and why it is important. 

• School records: the coming and going of early pick up and late drop offs. 

• How to protect yourself from losing personal items after separation through documentation. 

• When it comes to property what types of things you should document. 

• What are post separation contributions? 

• Why quantifying and proving post separation contributions might help you get it back in property settlement. 

• What is a financial statement for the family court?

• Why setting yourself up a budget 

• The difference between an online diary or online calendar vs a handwritten book or a handwritten note.

• Times when documentation saves someone's case during divorce, custody or property proceedings in the family court. 

• Documents and how it can help your case

• How documentation can help you if you have a manipulative and controlling ex.

• High conflict and documentation 

• Documentation if you have an amicable breakup

• Documentation and avoidant ex’s

• Parenting plans and documentation 

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

Trigger Warning: This podcast discusses coercive control and domestic violence.

You may have heard that DV is not just physical abuse. Just because they don’t hit you doesn’t mean you are not experiencing domestic or family violence.

In this episode we will talk about four things that you might not realise are DV that are flying under your radar.

We discuss coercive control and where you should go for support if you are experiencing this. We also explore the questions you need to ask yourself to find out if you might be experiencing some types of non physical forms of domestic violence or coercive control. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different. 

If this information is distressing for you or if you need support in regard to sexual assault, domestic or family violence you can call 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 for 24/7 phone and online services. If you, a child, or another person is in immediate danger, call 000. 

Click here to learn more about your DIY DIVORCE BLUEPRINT

Click here for our free before you leave checklist 

Click here for our free mediation checklist

Sign up here for our next free online webinar

Waitlist for our self represent in the family court course

Books mentioned

Reinventing Your Life: The Breakthrough Program to End Negative Behavior...and Feel Great Again  Aaron T. Beck ,  Jeffrey E. Young ,  Janet S. Klosko

Podcast Episodes that are related to this topic

Family Domestic Violence and How it impacts your case

Family Violence

Coercive Control in divorce and after separation

Coercive Control: how to help yourself or a friend

Stalking and Coercive Control

You Don’t Want to Miss Out On

• What are examples of non-physical forms of domestic violence?

• What types of silent treatment are considered a part of coercive control?

• What is the cycle of abuse?

• Why some unspoken rules with your partner could be domestic violence.

• What's wrong with hiding things from your family and friends that you were embarrassed about in your relationship.

• Control of money and what might be domestic violence.

• Tracking your expenses and giving you rules on how to spend it. 

• Are there different rules for your partner with the joint money?

• Money rules, what isn’t ok. 

• Who owns the money in a marriage?

• Questions to ask yourself to see if you are being financially controlled.

• Are you budgeting or is it financial control?

• Financial control what it might look like in your relationship?

• The difference between privacy and financial control.

• If they earn the money do you get a say in how it is spent?

• Love bombing and what happens after

• Narcissists and love bombing.

• Are they checking in on you all the time for love or for control?

• What happens when you go from a toxic coercive control relationship to a healthy relationship?

• Why seeing a psychologist can help you not fall back into the same pattern. 

• When the ex re partners

• When you repartner too early. 

• Moving yourself away from the same patterns 

• Why patterns of these behaviours make you lose your identity.

• How coercive control is a pattern

• How the courts are becoming more aware of it

• What you can do if this is happening to you

• Do you need to tell your lawyer if you suspect you have been under a coercive control relationship

• How confiding in a friend can help. 

• What type of friend you should consider telling about coercive control or domestic violence in your relationship?

• Defamation and how to be sure you don’t get in trouble with this. 

• Why you should start safely writing the abuse down so you can remind yourself later.

If you need emergency help you can also contact:

• WOMEN'S SHELTER SERVICE 

• LEGAL AID

• Lifeline 13 11 14

• Mensline Australia 1300 789 978

• Kids Help Line 1800 551 800

• Aboriginal Family Domestic Violence Hotline 1800 019 123

• Relationships Australia 

• Police on 000

• DVConnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week) Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill

• DV Connect Mensline on 1800 600 636

• National DV line on 1800 737 732.1800RESPECT 1800 737 732

Make sure you hit SUBSCRIBE so you don’t miss out on the next practical steps and guide to your divorce or de facto separation coming soon. And, if you’ve found this episode helpful, please leave a rating and a review so it can help others. Thank you. 

Please note this is general advice only. Please always seek independent legal advice as everyone’s situation is different.