This episode of The Feminist Dating Show is a juicy one-- I'm responding to a listener's voicemail about feeling completely hopeless after being ghosted... And after validating the hell out of her (because getting ghosted SUCKS), I got down to answering her question with a tactical action plan: How do you build hope in your dating life after so much disappointment? Is it even realistic to be hopeful in this dating climate? If these questions resonate with you, you're going to love love love this episode.

Links:

Date Brazen on TikTok

Date Brazen on Instagram

127. My response to the question, "Will I just die alone?"

128. The questions you don't say out loud..

139. Body image and your dating life with Bri Campos

140. My bless and release strategy for letting go

Kristen Neff, SelfCompassion.org

Simone Seol's Joyful Marketing Podcast

Work with Lily

• Join the Main Character Dating: https://datebrazen.com/dating
• Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book
• Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook
• Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/
• Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen
• Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

If you feel like a late bloomer, and you're fearful that will come off like a "red flag" when you start dating, this is for you.

This is a live coaching session with Dana, a healthcare worker who's never been in a long-term relationship and is wondering if it's too late for her. In one hour, Lily helps her build a full dating system from scratch.

Inside this episode:

💎 Why you're for the few, not for the many, and how that one reframe changes how you see every dating app profile

💎 How to build essence-based preferences live, so you know exactly what you want before you swipe

💎 The vetting questions that surface emotional maturity, shared values, and real adventure before you ever meet in person

💎 A dating profile makeover that starts with what you love, not an apology

💎 Why "I'm a late bloomer" isn't a "red flag"

Dana left this session with her preferences on paper, a vetting system, a rebuilt profile, and a completely different relationship to her own love life. You will too.

Work with Lily:

💎 Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book 💎 Join the Main Character Dating waitlist: https://datebrazen.com/dating 💎 Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook 💎 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/ 💎 Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen 💎 Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

You know that spiral where you replay a conversation for hours, convinced you said the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time? Lily's got one sentence that ends it.

This week's Episode Spotlight revisits the piece of advice that went viral for a reason: you cannot say the wrong thing to the right person.

Inside this episode:

✨ The exact moment on a first date Lily talked about her ex for 30 minutes straight, and why it didn't end the relationship (it's the one she's still in, eight years later)

✨ The follow-up nobody talks about: the right person isn't just forgiving, they know how to ask for what they need

✨ Why "minimum viable audience" means you're not for everybody, and that's the relief valve for first-date anxiety

✨ The difference between being a mind-reader and letting someone tell you what they need

✨ How to stop treating dating like there's a secret script you have to get right

→ Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book → Join the Main Character Dating waitlist: https://datebrazen.com/dating → Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook → Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/ → Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen → Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

If you've never been in a relationship before, or never been in a good one, and you identify with feelings of anxiety, hopelessness, or overwhelm when it comes to dating, and you just feel like it's impossible for you to find love and it's all over. This episode is for you.

This is exactly what I would do if I was your dating coach in the next three weeks, so you could build a joyful dating life, attract the best dates of your life, and make the right relationship inevitable this summer.

Inside Episode 275:

• Why "it happens when you least expect it" is actually desire suppression in disguise, and what to do instead
• How to build your matchmaker protocol: claim your essence-based preferences so you stop settling before you even get to the starting line
• The vetting questions I used as a professional matchmaker to qualify the right people and disqualify the wrong ones without mind drama
• Why rejection feels like death (it's biological, not dramatic) and how to build a bounce back plan so it stops running your dating life
• The Bounce Back protocol: a step-by-step rejection resilience plan you can write in your notes app right now

Work with Lily

• Join the Main Character Dating: https://datebrazen.com/dating
• Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book
• Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook
• Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/
• Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen
• Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

Your brain is convinced it knows how your love story ends. It's gathered all the evidence from your past and decided: this is just how it is. But your brain is not a fortune teller. It's a safety mechanism. And it is working with about 1% of the data.

In this episode of The Feminist Dating Show, Lily breaks down three reasons you might just be wrong that finding love is impossible — and why more is possible in your love life than you currently believe.

Inside episode 274:

• Why your brain's "it's never going to happen" narrative is a biological feature, not a fact about your future
• The math on how many people you haven't met yet — and what that means for your love life
• How to use the relationships you already have as evidence that more is coming
• The two things that actually change your timeline: proximity to opportunity and courageous behavior in the face of it
• Lily's ACK process for rewiring your brain toward possibility when scarcity takes over

Work with Lily:

• Join my free live training, Attract the Right Partner, Zero Experience Needed: https://datebrazen.com/lets-go
• Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book
• Join the Main Character Dating waitlist: https://datebrazen.com/dating
• Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook
• Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/
• Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen
• Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

Okay, let's say finding love is 100% all luck. A few weeks ago I shared my take: finding love is proximity to opportunity plus courageous behavior in the face of it. I got a lot of comments that said, "You're wrong, it's just 100% luck." So let's run the thought experiment. If finding love is 100% about luck... what creates the conditions for luck to occur? What even is luck? And how do you become the luckiest version of yourself in your dating life? This week's episode of The Feminist Dating Show shows you exactly how to create the luckiest love life possible, even if you've never been in a relationship before. Inside Episode 273 you'll learn: 💎 Why the story "I'm just not someone love happens to" isn't protecting you. It's shrinking opportunities your dating life. 💎 The two-part formula behind every lucky love story: proximity to opportunity plus courageous behavior in the face of it 💎 How to do the both/and-- hold real frustration or grief about your dating past without letting it become a prediction about your future 💎 What the both/and reframe actually looks like when you've been ghosted, rejected, or disappointed more times than you can count 💎 What creating the conditions for luck looks like in your love life this week

Work with Lily:

🔥 Join my free live training, Attract the Right Partner, Zero Experience Needed: https://datebrazen.com/lets-go

📖 Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book

✨ Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook

💜 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/

💜 Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen

💜 Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

You want dating to feel like something you're in charge of, that is going your way, not something that's happening to you. That shift-- from anxious hustle to magnetic momentum-- is what this episode is about.

This week on The Feminist Dating Show, Lily breaks down the three levels of dating energy and exactly how to move from bothered and stressed to unbothered in your love life.

Inside episode 272:

• The three levels of dating energy-- student, bothered CEO, unbothered CEO-- and the specific behaviors that tell you where you actually are right now
• Why the bothered CEO over-personalizes rejection and outsources decisions (and how to stop)
• The SOP system that removes anxious decision-making from your dating life entirely
• How to use jealousy and comparison as a compass pointing toward what you want instead of proof that you're behind
• The ACK method: a three-step framework for getting back to unbothered when rejection happens

💎 Join my free live training, Attract the Right Partner, Zero Experience Needed on June 9th, 2026: https://datebrazen.com/lets-go

💎 Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book

💎Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook

💎 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/

💎 Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen

💎 Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

This episode gets into why now is the best time to powerfully date — and why how you show up in your dating life is already changing the rest of your life, whether you realize it or not.

Inside this episode:

• Your brain fears rejection the same way it fears death. That's not a dramatic spiral. It's neurobiology, and understanding it changes how much you let fear stop you.
• Women are socialized not to want things. Wanting a relationship, for your own pleasure and heart, is already a radical act.
• The way you do one thing is the way you do everything. Playing small in your dating life is costing you at work, in your friendships, and in how much of your actual life you claim.
• Powerfully dating isn't grinding through the apps until you're numb. It's owning what you want, knowing your value, and showing up with a strategy.

Work with Lily:

🔥 Join my free live training, Attract the Right Partner, Zero Experience Needed

📖 Get the book, Thank You, More Please

✨ Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide

💜 Follow me on Instagram

💜 Follow me on TikTok

💜 Follow me on YouTube

If you want to meet someone IRL, but the "how" feels like a total mystery.... This episode tells you exactly why it hasn't happened yet and what to do about it. Inside episode 270:

→ The two things that determine whether you meet people IRL: proximity to opportunity and courageous behavior in the face of it

→ What joy building is and why it works

→What shooting your shot looks like when you're shy, anxious, or starting from zero

→ The self-assessment and action steps to take this week

Work with Lily:

💎 Join my free live training on June 9th 2026, Attract the Right Partner, Zero Experience Needed

→ Get the book, Thank You, More Please

→ Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide

→ Follow me on Instagram

→ Follow me on TikTok

→ Follow me on YouTube

You already know what the worst case scenario looks like. Your brain has mapped it out in extraordinary detail (in its attempt to keep you safe from rejection and vulnerability).

This episode is about what happens when you let the best case scenario take up some of that space too.

In this episode, Lily walks you through a best case scenario practice designed to open your brain up to possibility to getting exactly what you want-- without forcing you to believe anything you're not ready to believe yet.

Inside this episode:

• Why your brain defaults to worst case scenario thinking and why that habit is not a character flaw
• The difference between believing something 100% and simply making room for it. You don't have to be fully convinced for it to happen
• The plan that actually works to believe the best case scenario: "it might not be impossible that..."
• What your best case scenario sounds like when you say it out loud

💎 Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book

💎 Learn more about our high touch group program, Main Character Dating, : https://datebrazen.com/dating

💎 Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook

💎 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/

💎 Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen

💎 Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen