Understanding Today's Narcissist

There are bad bosses. The type that gets promoted without any managerial, interpersonal, or organizational skills. There are even scary bosses. The type that is unnecessarily threatening, overly aggressive, or ignorant to the point of causing others harm. But then there are the dark, sinister, or ominous bosses. This type is in a category all by themselves.

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Try to point out a narcissist’s mistakes and the attack is likely to be returned with force. Expect a narcissist to show understanding during a difficult time and the conversation will quickly be turned back towards the narcissist. Ask a narcissist to forgive an error in judgement and a detailed accounting of all blunders will be recounted.

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Since writing an article about parental alienation (What Parental Alienation Is and Is Not), several readers have asked for a follow-up article on how to prevent to minimize the damage of any alienation they have experienced. While others have said that parental alienation doesn’t happen, that it is pop-psychology, and it is not real.

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Katrina couldn’t believe how her friend was treating her husband at dinner. She was demanding, controlling, domineering, belittling, unrelenting, sarcastic, and unnecessarily rude. For some time now, Katrina suspected that her friend was narcissistic and after the evening they spent together, she was even more convinced.

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It was clear that after 7 years of marriage, Jack and Jill still loved each other. But they way they solved problems, or rather, the way they didn’t solve problems, was destroying their marriage. The last argument ended in a physical altercation and a wrestling match that left them ashamed and humiliated. Neither had ever engaged in this manner before so the shock of how quickly they escalated took them by surprise.

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It finally hit. After years of wondering what was wrong, who was crazy, and how this could have happened, the reality of abusive behavior hits like a ton of bricks. The insight is simultaneously overwhelming, shocking, frustrating, disgusting, and demeaning. But there it is the answer that was longed for but may never have been fully considered until this moment. Then everything became clear.

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Kathy woke-up startled to hear her phone ring so at 5 am, with COVID-19 and a stay-at-home order in place, she was immediately worried. On the line calling her was her narcissistic dad, which he hadn’t done since she left home, so she was immediately on high alert.

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Having grown up in an abusive family and now in a relationship with an abusive wife, Bradon believed the excuses constantly dished out to him by his abusive mother and wife. Beaten down, confused, hazy, and exhausted, he sought out help from a therapist. At first, he could not comprehend that he was the victim of abuse. He believed the lies that he was to blame. He thought abuse was only physical. But then Brandon learned it could also be verbal, emotional, mental, sexual, spiritual, and financial.

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Ever wondered what abuse sounds like? What do abusers say to their victims to get them to acquiesce? Some of the statements listed below might even sound acceptable in certain environments, but they are not. Abusive behavior is pervasive and without awareness, it will continue.

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As a general rule, people with personality disorders can be difficult to get along or maintain a healthy relationship with. They can be argumentative, stubborn, and frustrating if there is a lack of understanding about what a PD really means or how it manifests itself in an individual. A person with a PD has an inaccurate perception of reality which is pervasive in every environment and is not diagnosed until 18 years old. However, there always is a previous history of five years giving indications that a person has a PD before their formal diagnosis that can still help those around them identify the issue.

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