Often when we think of “big emotions” we think of tantrums, meltdowns, and big reactions. But many big-feeling kids don’t express their emotions loudly. Instead, they may worry, or get sad, or shut down. And of course it’s just as important to be able to support children whose big emotions are quieter. In this podcast, you’ll learn to understand what’s going on in the world of a child whose big emotions are a little softer… and what we can do to empower them and foster long-lasting resilience.

If we’re being honest, how often do we change our plans or our boundaries because we’re trying to avoid our children’s big emotions and reactions? We may clean up after them instead of asking them to do it… or give them extra time on screens or with a friend instead of enforcing a clear end time… because we want to avoid the inevitable big reaction when we do set that firm boundary. Unfortunately, letting our children’s emotions lead our home isn’t healthy for us or for them. In this episode, learn why children need us to be firm leaders and how we can face their big reactions with confidence (and without getting triggered). 

Often children with big emotions can be disrespectful -- calling you names, refusing to do what you ask, wanting to be first and best all the time, being rude to siblings and friends. We try to tell them that disrespect isn’t acceptable, and we may even punish them for it, but that doesn’t seem to reduce the disrespect. In this episode, you’ll learn why trying to make disrespect go away is ineffective… and what you can do instead to help your child want to act more respectful on their own.

Many couples who are raising children with big emotions disagree about how to handle children’s behaviors, moods, and attitudes. Often it’s very hard for either parent to consider the other’s point of view because each is so convinced that their own is correct. Interestingly, this “stubbornness” may be related to what both parents learned from their own personal experiences. In this episode, we’ll discuss how our past can impact our relationship with our spouse or co-parent and how we can see things differently if we want to get closer to being on the same page. 

Sometimes when kids get upset, we understand why -- someone was mean to them, they didn’t get their way, they had to stop doing something they were enjoying. But other times, their behavior or feelings seem completely illogical. Sometimes it seems like they get upset for no reason, or sometimes we do what they ask and they still get upset! In this episode, we’ll talk about why children’s behavior may be completely illogical and how you can respond in those situations (when nothing seems to work).

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You’ve learned how important it is to stay calm when a child is melting down or acting out. That in itself can be difficult, but what should you do if you are able to stay calm and it doesn’t seem to help… or even if your calm upsets your child more? In this episode, we’ll discuss why staying calm may backfire and what truly helps to diffuse dramatic situations.

While taking away privileges and other types of punishments may be effective in changing behavior, moods, and attitudes of some children, they tend not to help with big feeling children. In fact, threatening punishment often makes situations worse, making us feel helpless and wondering what other steps we can take. In this episode, we’ll discuss why punishments and consequences may be ineffective… and what you can do instead to foster responsible behavior and internal motivation.