Todd and Cathy discuss what brings us joy when we are young versus what brings us joy when we are older. They also discuss agreements that can be made within a relationship to keep communication open and healthy. They share why it’s important to appreciate who we are and where we are now, rather than trying to return to a certain time, body, or mindset that may not align with who we have become.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:01:00) Grief & Time- Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:07:13) Relationship Agreements

(00:22:40) Novelty & Ordinary

(00:25:26) Join Team Zen

(00:32:44) Incredible hulk

(00:34:49) Levels of joy **

(00:45:02) Body Awareness **

(00:48:40) Normal Eating **

(00:50:48 ) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Todd and Cathy discuss who’s in the inner circle of the Brat Pack and who is Brat Pack adjacent based on their memories from the 80s and their experience with Andrew McCarthy’s Brat Pack Documentary. They discuss how growth and self-awareness play significant roles in the documentary, and why some individuals evolve faster than others. They also touch on Inside Out 2 and address a listener question about shifting generational cycles.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:00:43) Join Team Zen

(00:01:20) Chain breaker in a family system

(00:10:20) Brats

(00:54:29) Inside Out

(01:00:58) Panic Attacks**

(01:01:32) Parts work **

(01:03:20) uncomfortable and uncomfortable emotion **

(01:05:42) Pride- Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(01:06:14) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Cathy and Todd discuss how women are socialized to become smaller and more restricted, and then begin to unwind and unfold this process once they become aware of what’s happening. Cathy provides an overview of this in her Substack titled ‘Women Unfolding,’ explaining why this is the image she sees in her mind when she works with women. Todd shares his version of men unfolding, and they discuss songs that have parentheses in the title and debate whether or not those parentheses are necessary.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:13:33) Todd’s perception of cheese sauce on nachos *

(00:00:52) Join Team Zen

(00:17:27) Women Unfolding- Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:20:29) Folds in regards to on our kids report cards *

(00:29:40) Folding in as if we’re still children *

(00:32:20) The hole

(00:44:15) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Todd and Cathy discuss acceptance and emphasize the importance of releasing old ideas and remaining open to new ones in order to figure out how to accept and move forward. They also discuss the reality of nuance and paradox, explaining why decision-making is not about finding the ‘right’ decision, but rather the right decision for right now. The also talk about Tim McGraw’s music and how it reminds us to be our best selves.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Monday Night Wildcard- Why did “Man or Bear” Go Viral? (all genders)

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:04:38) Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:10:54) Acceptance

(00:12:30) When couples lose themselves and blend

(00:28:33) Kids doing it differently

(00:29:02) Join Team Zen

(00:32:07) When life doesn’t match out blueprint **

(00:41:03) Devil’s advocate on acceptance**

(00:59:28) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Cathy and Todd discuss why necessary conversations are so difficult to manage and why and how we try to avoid them. They share examples of the experiences that lead to avoidance and offer insights into developing understanding instead. They emphasize why the most challenging and reactive conversations can be pivotal for relationships and lead to greater intimacy.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Monday Night Wildcard- Why did “Man or Bear” Go Viral? (all genders)

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:01:40) Cicadas

(00:06:35) Todd’s old man tendencies

(00:11:40) Relationship talk

(00:19:55) It’s not about the thing

(00:23:20) The cost of not dealing with conflict

(00:30:00) Join Team Zen

(00:49:49) Empty nest coaches **

(01:07:30) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

(01:07:30) Join Team Zen

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Cathy and Todd discuss Netflix’s ‘Love on the Spectrum’ and why the people and families featured make it such a good watch. They discuss the importance of loving, and liking, our children just as they are, and how this allows them to thrive, and they analyze Harrison Butker’s speech and why it was offensive in many different ways.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Monday Night Wildcard- Why did “Man or Bear” Go Viral? (all genders)

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Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:12:16) Love on the Spectrum

(00:30:00) Jamming on the Job

(00:35:30) Just love your kid **

(00:02:08) Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(01:02:00) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

(01:02:30) Join Team Zen

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Cathy and Todd discuss Gen X slang and intertwine the most popular phrases with clips from the most memorable pop culture moments. They discuss how language changes over time and break down the most popular Gen Z slang, offering suggestions on when to use it (or when not to).

Todd and Cathy are hosting a live discussion about the “man or bear” debate on Monday, May 20th at 7pm CT through the MenLiving platform – all genders are welcome, see below for link to join.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Monday Night Wildcard- Why did “Man or Bear” Go Viral? (all genders)

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:02:42) Join Team Zen

(00:03:54) Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:09:38) Slang

(00:36:40) Todd’s English class in high school **

(00:45:15) Gen Z Slang

(00:46:00) You’re primitive **

(01:03:00) To Netflix and chill **

(00:48:32) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Cathy and Todd discussed the viral “man or bear” debate, addressing why many women felt compelled to pick “bear” and why some men felt hurt or angry. They discussed the importance of listening and empathy when it comes to other people’s experiences and how being defensive might be our initial reaction, but we can choose compassion and understanding. They also discussed why opting out of something we don’t want to do makes room for the things we do want to do. Todd and Cathy are hosting a live discussion about the “man or bear” debate on Monday, May 20th at 7pm CT through the MenLiving platform – all genders are welcome, see below for link to join.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Join Team Zen

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

Monday Night Wildcard- Why did “Man or Bear” Go Viral? (all genders)

Donate to MenLiving

Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:00:52) Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:01:42) Join Team Zen

(00:06:11) Cathy opting out **

(00:22:46) Man or bear

(00:35:06) Get curious

(00:38:52) Power over **

(00:48:32) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Todd and Cathy discuss how to talk to kids in the morning without being too annoying. They also discuss when to use Gen Z slang and when not to, and why not “needing” too much from our kids makes us easier to talk to. They also discuss Taylor’s new album, the movie Swingers, and why pop culture makes for great conversation with our kids.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Donate to MenLiving

Join Team Zen

Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:00:41) Swingers- movie and lifestyle

(00:01:56) Risky Business

(00:04:20) Join Team Zen

(00:06:45) Actors who are good athletes

(00:10:08) The movie “Swingers” and parenting

(00:21:53) Todd’s challenges in the morning ***

(00:25:55) Sign up for Cathy’s Substack

(00:29:45) Understanding teenage slang words

(00:47:08) Just be authentic ***

(00:52:20) The Bolter by Taylor Swift

(00:55:00) Painting and Remodeling Needs?  Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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Todd and Cathy discussed the importance of developing talents and the challenges of pursuing one’s passions. They also emphasized the need for understanding and empathizing when teenage boys lash out or question their belonging (they share an audioclip from Dr. John Duffy). They shared the difference between empathy and sympathy, and why it’s important to be really clear about what you need and ask for it. They ended the show by discussing the victim, villain, hero triangle and what it really means when you are ‘hero-ing’ someone.

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

Resources

Donate to MenLiving

Join Team Zen

Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

Time Stamps

(00:03:44)  Passion vs Talent

(00:27:14) Do our boys feel lost?

(00:29:35) Join Team Zen

(00:42:02)  Empathy vs sympathy

(00:48:25) Not letting it sit *

(00:59:26) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800

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