From Betrayal To Breakthrough

402: 7 Steps to Regain Control After Betrayal


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Episode Summary:
In this episode, we dive deep into the overwhelming emotions that follow betrayal and how to navigate through them. Betrayal is unlike any other trauma—it shatters trust, self-worth, and your sense of safety. But healing is possible, and this episode will guide you through seven actionable steps to help you regain control, rebuild your foundation, and start moving toward your breakthrough. 

 

Key Topics Covered: 

 Betrayal as a Unique Trauma 

  • Betrayal affects the self deeply, shattering confidence, worthiness, and trust. 

  • Unlike other traumas, betrayal comes from those closest to us, making the pain more profound. 

  • Insights from the TEDx talk Do You Have Post-Betrayal Syndrome?  highlight the raw and all-consuming pain of betrayal.  

The Seven Steps to Regain Control 

 Acknowledge and Honor Your Feelings 

  • Avoid numbing, distracting, or suppressing emotions; instead, face and feel them to start healing. 

  • Prolonging emotions keeps you stuck in pain and post-betrayal syndrome. 

 Breathe to Ground Yourself 

  • Use simple breathing exercises (e.g., inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4) to regulate your nervous system and regain calm. 

Establish a Sense of Safety 

  • Create a physical and emotional space where you feel secure—a retreat to regroup and think clearly. 

 Anchor Yourself in the Present 

  • Counter overwhelming “what if” and “why” thoughts by grounding yourself through physical sensations, like touching your arm or holding an object. 

  Seek the Right Support 

  • Surround yourself with people and professionals who understand betrayal trauma and can guide you forward. 

  • Be cautious of well-meaning friends or professionals who may unintentionally keep you stuck. 

Focus on What You Can Control 

  • Reclaim a sense of agency by focusing on small, manageable aspects of your life, like daily habits or your environment. 

Visualize Your Future Self 

  • Envision a healed and empowered version of yourself, even if it’s just one small step ahead. This vision becomes the foundation for your transformation. 

 

Why Support Matters 

  • The Danger of the Wrong Support: 

  • Support groups or friends may inadvertently encourage staying stuck in the problem rather than working toward healing. 

  • Therapists or counselors without expertise in betrayal trauma may solidify your position in Stage 3 (the hardest stage to move through). 

  • The Power of the Right Support: 

  • Seek communities and professionals that inspire growth, offer actionable strategies, and help you move through the Five Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough. 

 

Resources to Support Your Healing 

  • Reclaim Program at The PBT Institute: 

  • A holistic, research-based program designed to guide you through the Five Stages of Healing. 

  • Access certified coaches, daily live classes, somatic and mindset healing, and open Q&A sessions to address your specific needs. 

  • Community and Expert Guidance: 

  • Join a community of people who’ve been there and come out stronger. Learn from their journeys and gain clarity on your path forward. 

 

Key Takeaways: 

  • Healing from betrayal is not only possible—it’s predictable with the right tools and support. 

  • Your emotions, while overwhelming, are valid and essential to process. Avoid numbing or distracting yourself. 

  • By grounding yourself, reclaiming control, and focusing on your future self, you can rebuild your life on your terms. 

  • Don’t stay stuck. There is a proven path forward, and you deserve to move beyond your pain into a life filled with meaning and strength. 

 

Links and Resources: 

  • The PBT Institute 

  • Learn more about the Reclaim program:   

  • Blog post: Feeling Overwhelmed and In Shock After Betrayal: 7 Steps to Regain Control  

  • TEDx Talk: Do You Have Post-Betrayal Syndrome?   

Closing Message:
Remember, betrayal may have happened to you, but it doesn’t define you. You are worthy of healing, and with the right support, you can transform even the most painful experiences into a story of resilience, growth, and purpose. Let us help you take that first step toward your breakthrough. 

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From Betrayal To BreakthroughBy Dr. Debi Silber

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