Breakups are hard for everyone. But for women with ADHD, they can feel all-consuming. Dr. J unpacks why heartbreak hits harder when you have ADHD — and how your brain’s reward system, emotional regulation, and executive functions all get thrown off balance. 

You’ll learn science-backed strategies to stop the mental replay loop, manage impulsivity, and start healing with compassion. If you’ve ever felt “too much” after a breakup, this episode is for you.

For more on this topic: 

• Listen: Dr. J’s breakup playlist
• Listen: ADHD and emotional regulation
• Listen: ADHD and dating: Why crushes feel so intense
• Listen: ADHD and dating: Why casual dating never feels casual

Timestamps:  

(00:47) Why heartbreak feels like withdrawal for ADHD brains

(01:26) How emotional intensity and slower recovery amplify grief

(02:54) The science behind stress, distraction, and impulsivity

(06:24) Practical tools to interrupt mental replay and reclaim focus

(09:48) Using your ADHD traits to support recovery and renewal

For a transcript and more resources, visit MissUnderstood on Understood.org. You can also email us at [email protected].

ADHD Unstuck is a free, self-guided activity from Understood.org and Northwestern University designed to help women with ADHD boost their mood and take small, practical steps to get unstuck. In about 10 minutes, learn why mood spirals happen and get a personalized action plan of quick wins and science-backed strategies that work with your brain. Give it a try at Understood.org/GetUnstuck.

Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

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