This week on Parenting Behavior,  we’re sharing an episode of another great Understood.org podcast, In It, where Dr. Andy Kahn is a regular guest. The show is all about raising kids who learn and think differently.

On this episode, Andy joins the In It  hosts to talk about a big parenting debate: Bribes vs. rewards.  

You probably know how it goes: Your child is refusing to do something that, to you, seems super reasonable. Do you offer them a reward to get them to cooperate? Where is the line between bribery and rewarding a child? Will that ruin them?

Listen to get Andy’s expert advice, and follow In It wherever you get your podcasts. 

Related resources

• What are positive behavioral interventions and supports (PBIS)?
• 7 ideas for using rewards and consequences
• The power of motivation for kids who learn and think differently
• How to give praise that builds kids’ self-esteem
• “I’m not yelling—you’re yelling!” Tips for staying calm when kids act out

Timestamps 

(1:22) The difference between a bribe and a reward

(5:08) Pairing verbal praise with reinforcement

(8:31) How close to the behavior should the reward be

(16:03) Money as a reward

(21:08) Behavior charts and LTDs

(25:14) Helping kids change behaviors

For a transcript and more resources, visit the In It page at Understood.org

We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at [email protected].

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

There’s nothing quite as heartbreaking as the question, “Is my child lonely?”

It’s common for parents to worry if a child is having challenges connecting, or if their social skills seem like they're not aligned with their peers.

But it’s also important to consider our perceptions as parents. Are the concerns legit, or do we just need to look differently at our child? 

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn talks about loneliness and social skills for kids.

For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the Parenting Behavior page on Understood.org

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

Related resources

• Why kids who learn and think differently might feel lonely
• My child likes being alone. Does this mean he’s lonely?
• What to do when kids say “no one will play with me”

Timestamps

(00:51) Is it loneliness, or is it you?

(03:00) How does your child feel about the situation?

(06:09) How do I help my child with social struggles?

(09:51) Quick recap

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Sometimes, our kids just won’t try anything new. This can be something small, like not wanting to try a new food. But it can also be a bigger issue, like your child refusing to go to a new after-school activity they’ve joined. 

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn will talk about how to get your child to engage in new activities, especially those that make them feel afraid or anxious. 

Related resources

• What is growth mindset?
• Why kids have trouble following a routine or schedule
• Behavior: What is it, and how can parents affect it?

Timestamps

(0:47) Coping with discomfort

(4:11) Developing a “growth mindset”

(6:37) Watch-outs for parents

For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the Parenting Behavior page on Understood.org

 We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Assistive technology can be a bit of a buzzword in parenting and educational circles. It’s not always well-defined or well-understood. 

But assistive technology can be helpful for people with ADHD. Options range from virtual calendars and voice recording apps to things that don’t even seem like “technology” at all. 

Related resources

• 5 low-cost ways to create a sensory-friendly chair
• 6 types of fidgets for kids with ADHD
• 7 apps to help teens with ADHD manage everyday challenges

Timestamps

(0:48) What is assistive technology?  

(3:00) Specific examples  

(6:32) Artificial intelligence vs. assistive technology

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

For parents, the happiest time of the year can also be the most stressful. 

Busy parties. Strange foods served to picky eaters. The dread of worrying how your child will respond if they don’t like the sweater grandma gave them. 

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn and guest Dr. Karen Wilson share five key tips to prepare your family for the holiday season. 

Karen is a clinical neuropsychologist and, like Andy, a parent. So, get ready for tips that come from a mix of professional expertise and real-life parenting. 

Related resources

• How to make the holidays more fun for your child  
• 16 holiday survival tips for kids with ADHD
• Understood Assistant 

Timestamps

(00:55) What makes the holidays so hard?  

(02:45) Tip #1: Prepare yourself for stress

(03:59) Tip #2: Set up your child for success

(06:35) Tip #3: Create a schedule that works for you

(09:04) Tip #4: How to teach your child to accept gifts

(11:31) Tip #5: Plan ahead for picky eaters

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

The concept of self-esteem can seem abstract.  

And when it comes to improving your child’s self-esteem, it can be an uphill battle for parents.  

But host Dr. Andy Kahn has some practical strategies for boosting your child’s self-esteem that he’ll share on this episode of “Parenting Behavior.”

Related resources

• The importance of positive self-esteem for kids
• ADHD and self-esteem: What to say to your child
• Why kids say negative things about themselves

Timestamps

(00:47) What is self-esteem?

(02:15) Practical strategies

(07:37) Social media and self-esteem

(10:41) The importance of love and care

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Bullying can be one of the most difficult parts of being a kid and being a parent. 

And for neurodivergent kids with learning and thinking differences like ADHD and dyslexia, it can be an additional challenge.

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn talks about handling those challenges — whether your child is being bullied, or is engaging in bullying behavior themselves.

Related resources

• 8 steps to take if your child is being bullied at school
• Bullying and being bullied: Why it happens and what families can do
• Bullying, learning differences, and how to help

Timestamps

(00:49) What is bullying? 

(02:49) How to talk to your child about bullying

(04:13) Bullying and neurodivergent kids

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Your child might come home from school and say some troubling things about their teacher. “My teacher hates me. I can’t do anything right!” “I’m so messy, and she tells me that I just can’t get my space cleaned up.”

If you’re hearing things like this, it’s usually a sign that there’s some challenge between your child and their teacher.

These can be difficult issues to navigate, but there are strategies to manage teacher troubles. Tune in to this episode of Parenting Behavior with Dr. Andy Kahn for ways to help.

Related resources

• 9 steps to take if the teacher hurts your child’s feelings
• My child’s teacher is mean to her. What can I do?
• 8 steps to advocating for your child at school 

Timestamps

(00:44) Figuring out your child’s perceptions  

(01:51) Validating your child’s feelings

(05:29) Validating the teacher’s experience  

(07:03) How to find solutions

(09:13) How challenges can help kids grow and thrive  

(10:42) What to do if the situation is really bad

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Parent-teacher conferences can seem like high-pressure events. 

There are only 10 or 15 minutes, at most, for you and the teacher to discuss many important things. Plus you want to keep things positive and the teacher engaged. It’s a lot to consider.

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn will talk about some things you can do to make the conference as successful as possible. 

Related resources

• 3 ways I engage my child in parent-teacher conferences 
• Teachers weigh in: What I wish parents asked at parent-teacher conferences
• Listen: How to make the most of parent-teacher conferences
• Download: Parent-teacher conference worksheet

Timestamps

(00:54) Basic ways to prepare before the conference

(02:29) Advance communication

(04:44) How to prepare emotionally

(08:16) Special considerations for neurodivergent kids

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Learning challenges in kids can be really tricky to spot.

It can be hard to tell whether your child can’t do something, or if they just won’t. And sometimes it’s not clear what’s an in-the-moment challenge and what’s a pattern. 

On this episode of Parenting Behavior, host Dr. Andy Kahn will explain how to spot what might be a learning difference in your child. 

We’d love to hear from you. You can email us at [email protected].

A transcript for this episode is available on Understood.org.  

Related resources

• What are learning and thinking differences?
• The difference between learning disorder and learning disability
• Learning disabilities: What they are and aren’t
• Kids with multiple learning and thinking differences: What you need to know

Timestamps

(0:53) How to gather good data

(1:57) Looking for patterns

(3:09) Using homework to find clues

(5:37) How to spot motor or physical difficulties

(7:29) Why frustration can be a good thing

Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give