“Trauma does not reside in the bad event. Trauma is what becomes embedded in your body in the wake of a bad event when there’s no one there to comfort you.”

What if you've been viewing trauma all wrong? And what if you don't think you've experienced trauma but you actually have? My guest this week is renowned trauma therapist Adam Young, and we're having a powerful conversation on not only trauma but our origin stories—specifically our family-of-origin stories. Adam explains why the wounds we minimize—the moments we brush off as “not that bad”—often carry the deepest impact. Because, as he explains, the real harm isn’t the event itself but what happened after: the absence of comfort, attunement, engagement, and care. That’s what embeds in our bodies and shapes the ways we cope. And often, that coping becomes unhealthy when we don't name what has happened and talk about it.

Adam unpacks how trauma lives in the body, why triggers are often physiological rather than emotional, and how our relational histories shape the addictions we later develop. He also explains why dysregulation isn’t a character flaw but a survival response, and why compassion toward your younger self may be the most mature step you can take.

This episode is an invitation to look beneath the behaviors you want to change and explore the stories that shaped them. Healing begins by honoring your wounds and telling the truth about where you come from.

We Explore:

— Why trauma is not the event but the absence of an empathetic witness afterward
— The connection between chronic dysregulation and addiction
— How the body keeps responding to stories long after the mind forgets
— The role of triggers and why they’re physiological
— Why kindness changes the heart more effectively than shame
— What children need to develop securely—and what happens when those needs aren’t met
— How unresolved family-of-origin stories form our adult coping strategies
— Why honoring your wounds is an act of courage, not self-pity
— Practical next steps for engaging your story with curiosity instead of contempt

Website: https://adamyoungcounseling.com

Podcast: The Place We Find Ourselves

Book: Make Sense of Your Story

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“We all just have different medicines that we reach for.”

That’s how Tim Sexton describes the real story behind the affair that blew up his life. Even though at one point that affair led to his downfall as a pastor, today it's not something he hides from. Instead, he's leaning into it in hopes to help others, and one of the ways he's doing that is by calling out the roots that run much deeper. Those roots for him? A lifelong addiction to people-pleasing and affirmation rooted in childhood trauma, fear, and spiritual confusion.

In this conversation, Tim opens up about growing up with two alcoholic parents, feeling responsible for their chaos, and carrying a distorted picture of God into adulthood—one built on fear, performance, and the desperate need to be enough. He shares how that inner ache followed him into marriage and ministry, how it quietly shaped his identity, and how flattery, secrecy, and emotional validation became the “medicine” that eventually led to infidelity.

But this is not only a story about destruction. It’s also a story about the long road back—through exposure, humility, counseling, discipleship, and the honest surrender that brings real freedom. Tim talks about the years he spent dismantling false identities, the painful undoing that came even after public confession, and the miracle of restoration he never expected.

If you’ve ever thought you've done something beyond forgiveness, this episode reminds you that there is always hope.

We explore:

—Why infidelity was a symptom, not the root
—How childhood trauma and alcoholic parents shaped Tim’s identity
—People-pleasing as an addiction
—Why fear of God (not awe of God) destroyed his early faith
—The moment everything collapsed on a high-school football field
—What public shame exposed in him
—Why approval addiction is every bit as powerful as substance addiction
—How Jesus rebuilt him from the inside out
—Why the church must rethink restoration
—What it really means when Tim says “The best definition of sin I’ve ever heard is you and me trying to get our needs met apart from Christ.”

Website: M46Dads.com

Book: Fight for Their Hearts: Hope and Help for Every Dad

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Our hypocrisy is our testimony. That’s God’s glory on display.”

That truth from Faith Womack is exactly what those of us with messy sanctification stories not only need to hear, but embrace and embody. We all fall short. We all stumble. And yet, God uses our weakness—not our polished moments—to reveal His power and his grace.

Faith Womack is one of the most popular Bible teachers on the internet with over 200,000 Instagram followers, and today she's joining the podcast to talk about how our struggles are exactly what God uses to not only refine us but to put himself on display.

In this conversation, Faith and I also talk about how to actually read the Bible faithfully, why so many Christians misuse Scripture, and what it means to walk out holiness without falling into perfectionism. We explore the tension between grace and obedience, why context matters, why so many believers doubt their salvation, and how to build a life that’s rooted in the Word of God. She even helps us unpack some of the Scriptures used against those of us with messy sanctification stories and introduces us to her new book, No More Boring Bible Study.

If you’ve ever felt like your failures or weaknesses disqualify you, this episode is a reminder that they are the very place God shines the brightest.

We explore:

— Why “hermeneutics” isn’t scary but essential
— What legalism gets wrong about holiness
— Lordship Salvation and the fear of “going on sinning”
— How to hold grace and obedience together without shame
— Why the thief on the cross destroys our performance mindset
— What 1 John and Romans 7 really teach about believers and sin
— How to stop weaponizing Scripture and start being formed by it
— Why Bible study must be relational, not just informational
— How abiding in Christ transforms us over time
— The lifelong journey from hypocrisy to testimony

Website: BibleNerdMinistries.com

Instagram: @biblenerdministries

Book: No More Boring Bible Study

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“I was tormented. Literally tormented. I'd look in the mirror and go, ‘What are you doing? That’s not you.’”

Brandon Puffer had everything, or so it seemed. He was a Major League pitcher with a World Series ring and was even being groomed to be a big league coach. But beneath the success were so many secret wounds that he refused to deal with. One night, after years of quiet compromising and numbing pain with alcohol, he made a decision that changed everything.

In this episode, Brandon tells his story with raw honesty—from a childhood shaped by trauma and numbing, to five years of sobriety and faith, to the night that landed him in a Texas prison. He shares how small compromises led to massive consequences, what repentance really looks like, and how God’s grace can redeem even the most broken story.

This isn’t a tale of excuses, it’s one of ownership, humility, and the long, painful work of redemption.

We explore:

— The slippery slope from “one drink” to full relapse
— How trauma and insecurity planted the seeds of addiction
— Why white-knuckling sobriety never works
— What true repentance means: turning, not just confessing
— How taking full responsibility became his path to freedom
— The consequences that remain even after grace
— How to live unashamed when the world won’t forget
— Why humility, gratitude, and daily discipline keep him sober
— What it means to be “faithful in the little things” after hitting bottom

Website: coachpuffpositive.com

Book: From the Bullpen to the State Pen

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Sin’s power is disconnection.”

That's one of the essential ideas that runs through what therapist and author Chuck DeGroat talks about in this episode. A longtime pastor and counselor, Chuck isn't just commenting on burnout and addiction from afar—he's actually lived it. In fact, he opens up about his own journey of breaking down in his early forties, when his body and soul finally gave out after years of religious workaholism. That collapse became the doorway into healing what was broken within. That also happens to be the topic of his latest book, Healing What's Within.

In this conversation, Chuck unpacks what he calls homing: the Spirit’s invitation to return to the worth, belonging, and purpose we were made for. We talk about addiction not as the problem, but as the attempted solution to disconnection. Chuck even explains why true recovery isn’t about behavior modification, but about reconnection—to God, to self, and to others.

We also discuss why repentance must be specific, how trauma fragments our stories, and what it means to offer empathy to our unhealed parts rather than shame.

This is a deeply pastoral, psychological, and hopeful episode for anyone who’s ever wondered, Why do I do what I don’t want to do—and how do I find my way home?

We explore:

— The three essential questions from Genesis that still heal today: “Where are you?”, “Who told you?”, and “Have you eaten?”
— How addiction is an attempted solution to pain and disconnection
— Why every human is, at some level, an addict
— The myth of purity and how God still uses broken people
— What true repentance looks like: specific, reparative, and relational
— “Faux-nerability” vs. authentic vulnerability
— Why trauma isn’t what happens to us, but what happens inside us
— The four needs every child has: to be safe, seen, soothed, and secure
— The danger of coping mechanisms that look holy, like workaholism
— How to come home to yourself through curiosity, connection, and grace

Website: chuckdegroat.net

Explore one of Chuck's Soul Care Intensives

Chuck's blog: "Sit With Chuck"

Book: Healing What's Within

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Sin doesn’t care who you are or what you’ve seen—it’s coming for all of us.”

That theme runs through Kirby Kelly’s story. See, she's part of a group of women you don't often hear about: females that struggle (or have struggled) with pornography addiction. Kirby's story is heartbreaking: She was exposed to pornography at four years old, again at seven, and then again at ten. Each time the exposure happened it left a deeper imprint of secrecy and shame. Even after coming to Christ, she carried the hidden struggle for years, convinced she had to fix it alone. In college, a simple exercise called "stand for your sister" opened the door to confession, community, and real healing.

But Kirby's exposure to addiction goes beyond her own. She also happens to be the child of two parents who died of complications related to alcoholism. 

In this episode, Kirby talks candidly about growing up as the daughter of two alcoholics, why isolation kept her stuck, and how confession—to God and within community—helped her find freedom. She also shares how abiding in Christ moved from discipline to desire, why boundaries are not buzzkills but protection, and the hope-filled message she wants every struggling parent to hear.

We explore:

— Early exposure, shame, and why secrecy fuels addiction
— Confession vs. concealment and how healing begins in honest community
— Sanctification: messy, daily, real
— Escapism, control, and chasing dopamine
— Abiding in Christ as the path to peace and freedom
— Practical boundaries for media and triggers
— What she tells parents wrestling with addiction and their kids

Website: kirby-kelly.com

Instagram: @kirbyisaboss

Book: You Can Be Free 

Podcast: Bought & Beloved

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Getting sober without salvation is like giving a painkiller to a cancer patient.”

That’s how John Elmore describes the difference between behavior modification and true transformation. He'd know. He was on the verge of ending it all with a shotgun when he finally realized his problem went deeper than just the alcohol. In this powerful and deeply personal conversation, John shares how he spent nearly two decades in the grip of alcoholism—trying everything to fix himself except surrendering to Jesus.

From age 13 to 30, alcohol was John's solution, not his problem. But when everything fell apart, he encountered the only thing that could actually save him: the Gospel. Today, as the teaching pastor at Harris Creek Baptist Church in Waco, TX, and the author of Freedom Starts Today, John helps others discover the same freedom that changed his life.

In this episode, we talk about what it means to go from death to life, why sobriety without Jesus will never be enough, and how real recovery happens when grace becomes the motivation instead of guilt.

This is about coming to the end of yourself and realizing there's not just something better, but someone better.

We explore:

— Why “getting sober” isn’t the same as being saved
— How sin’s power is greater than willpower
— Why alcohol wasn’t the problem—it was the “solution”
— What happens when you aim for Jesus instead of behavior management
— The spiritual warfare behind addiction and shame
— Why every idol eventually destroys what it promises
— How to find freedom one day at a time through repentance
— John’s ACT framework: Ask, Commit, Talk
— What daily dependence on Christ looks like after recovery
— Why transformation is only possible through the gospel

Follow John Elmore on Instagram.

Book: Freedom Starts Today

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order Jon's new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic.

Watch this episode and get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“I didn’t know how to sit still with myself. I didn’t want to be alone with myself.”

That’s what Hannah Brencher realized when she was finally able to admit she was an addict. But she wasn't addicted to any substance. Instead, she suffered from an addiction much more common, much more acceptable: her phone. And so many of us share that addiction.

Hannah, one of my favorite writers and the author of The Unplugged Hours, opens up about what it took to finally put her phone down, how grief and boredom became her greatest teachers, and why building an inner life is the work we can’t outsource to our screens. We also dive into what happens when distraction becomes dependence, when we build our identity on productivity, and when silence feels like the scariest place in the world.

This is a conversation about learning to pay attention again, about how to listen to the still, small voice that says enough is enough, and especially about understanding how to be present. If your addiction is to technology, especially to your phone, this episode is important.

We explore: 

— How phone addiction mirrors other forms of addiction
— Why we can’t heal if we won’t be still
— The illusion of productivity and why our worth isn’t in our output
— How the phone amplifies anxiety, loneliness, and shame
— The spiritual discipline of paying attention
— How boredom becomes the birthplace of creativity
— What it means to build an “inner life” instead of curating an online one
— Why grace, not guilt, has to lead this journey
— The difference between honesty and vulnerability
— What “enough is enough” sounds like in everyday life

Follow Hannah: @hannahbrencher

Book: The Unplugged Hours

Hannah's website: hannahbrenchercreative.com

Get Hannah's emails here.

Free "unplugged hours" tracker.

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order the new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic: www.christianalcoholic.com.

Watch this episode and get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Once I started drinking, I didn’t want to stop until something made me.”

That’s how Stephanie Ziebell describes the grip alcohol had on her life. Stephanie got sober in Wisconsin—the capital of drinking culture. The place where not having alcohol at your wedding is like not having a bride. But as she shares, even in the middle of a state built on beer, Jesus met her in the mess and gave her freedom she couldn’t find through willpower alone.

In this episode, Stephanie opens up about her journey from college party girl to high-powered attorney, from “just wine” to 3 a.m. panic attacks and text messages to her boss that said, “I’m an alcoholic and I need help.” She talks about trying to hold everything together—career, marriage, motherhood—while secretly unraveling, and how God used a boss’s compassion, a pastor’s prayer, and Celebrate Recovery to bring her home.

This is a story for anyone who’s tried to dress up sin as "self care," negotiate with themselves over their drinking, or white-knuckle their way through life. And especially those who hit rock bottom, only to find it kept going deeper. 

We explore:

—Why Wisconsin’s drinking culture is unlike anywhere else
—How “sophisticated wine drinking” became the new disguise for addiction
—What it’s like to hit multiple rock bottoms before real change
—Why 3 a.m. panic attacks can become divine wake-up calls
—The difference between knowing and admitting you have a problem
—How shame keeps us stuck and grace sets us free
—What it looks like when a boss and a pastor respond with compassion, not condemnation
—How Celebrate Recovery and Scripture changed Stephanie’s mindset
—Why grace—not guilt—is the most powerful motivator for healing
—What life looks like now on the other side of surrender

Follow Stephanie: @radiantinbattle

Get Stephanie's sobriety guides here.

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order the new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic: www.christianalcoholic.com.

Watch this episode and get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Shame is first and foremost not a thing that begins with me thinking a certain thing about myself. It begins first as a thing that I feel literally in my body.”

That’s how Dr. Curt Thompson reframed shame in our incredible conversation—and I think he'll probably do the same for you, too. Curt is a psychiatrist, author, and speaker who has shaped the conversation around shame, vulnerability, and the stories we tell ourselves. In this episode, we talk about why addicts often feel trapped in cycles of shame, how vulnerability heals what hiding cannot, and why our deepest longings can only be met when we’re seen, soothed, safe, and secure.

This conversation weaves together neuroscience, theology, psychology, and pastoral wisdom. Curt unpacks why shame isolates, how addicts can actually become addicted to shame itself, and why bearing our wounds may be the most powerful witness of all.

If you've struggled with shame related to who you are, who you were, or what you've done, please listen to this episode. You won't regret it.

We explore:

—Why shame starts in the body, not the mind
—The connection between shame and addiction
—Why we sometimes become addicted to shame itself
—How storytelling helps us make sense of pain
—The difference between godly grief and toxic shame
—Why vulnerability is central to healing
—The role of wounds in the Gospel and why Jesus models them
—The four core needs: seen, soothed, safe, secure
—How vulnerability allows others to feel known and loved
—Why the Christian story reframes shame into redemption

Website: curtthompsonmd.com

Podcast: The Being Known Podcast

Books: The Soul of Shame, The Soul of Desire, Anatomy of the Soul

Follow Jon: @jonseidl

Order the new book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic: www.christianalcoholic.com.

Watch this episode and get daily motivation: www.theveritasdaily.com

Support the Show: https://www.jonseidl.com/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.