Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Go deeper on tools to resolve shame - see episode 128

Episode show notes:

A lot of men ask –

“What if the porn urge just comes back?”

And a lot of wives feel the same fear. One woman said,

This fear creates pressure, anxiety, and tension in the relationship. The man feels like he has to be perfect. The wife feels like she can’t relax.

This episode helps both of you understand the real reason urges come back — and how to stop that from happening.

You’ll learn:

If you're working on porn addiction recovery and want to feel more in control — not just avoid porn but actually overcome porn urges for good — this episode will give you a clear plan.

It’s also helpful for relapse prevention, handling pornography triggers, and understanding how real porn addiction counseling goes beyond filters and rules. It gets to the heart of the problem so you can move forward with healing.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Perfectionism might look like high standards — but for many men, it’s actually fear in disguise.

In this episode, we talk about how the pressure to always “get it right” becomes one of the biggest hidden triggers for porn use.

You’ll learn why feelings of failure, shame, and “not being enough” create the emotional weight that drives the urge to escape through pornography — and how to break that cycle for good.

Instead of fighting perfectionism with more willpower or affirmations, you’ll discover how to pinpoint the real issue underneath it — whether it’s stress, disconnection, or a skill that just needs to be built.

This episode will help you:

Understand the root cause of pornography addiction linked to perfectionism and shame.

Learn how to overcome porn urges by removing the emotional pressure that fuels them.

Build a stronger sense of self-worth that’s not tied to performance or success.

See failure differently — not as proof you’re broken, but as feedback about your system that can be improved.

If you’ve ever felt like you have to be perfect to feel worthy — or that one slip means you’ve ruined all your progress — this episode will help you breathe again.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Even after months of progress, one small trigger can make everything feel like it’s falling apart — a look, a memory, a tone — and suddenly all the safety you’ve been building in your porn addiction recovery feels shaky again.

In this episode, I talk about what’s really happening in those moments when a porn trigger hits and your whole system goes into panic mode. I’ll help you understand why triggers don’t mean you’ve failed, and why they’re actually a normal part of the porn recovery process.

I’ll share the “Falling Tiles” analogy I use with clients to explain what’s going on beneath the surface, and how emotional safety, consistency, and small moments of follow-through are what create real freedom from pornography, not just temporary self-control.

We’ll cover:

Whether you’re working to overcome porn addiction, heal from pornography use, or rebuild trust in your relationship, this episode will help you make sense of the ups and downs and show you how to find steady ground again — not through willpower, but through understanding, consistency, and connection.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Can you ever really cure porn addiction — or is it something you’ll struggle with for life?

In this episode of The Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction Podcast, licensed marriage and family therapist Sam Tielemans breaks down one of the most debated questions in pornography recovery:

Most people are told that pornography addiction is something they’ll always have to manage.

But Sam explains why lasting porn addiction recovery isn’t about endless management or white-knuckling — it’s about healing the root cause of pornography use so you can finally experience freedom.

You’ll hear three powerful, real-life stories of men who overcame porn addiction by addressing the emotional and relational roots behind it — stress, loneliness, and shame. Through their journeys, you’ll learn:

How to identify the root of your pornography addiction (emotional, habitual, or physical)

Why willpower and filters don’t work long-term

How to replace porn with genuine emotional connection and inner stability

The process to rebuild trust and intimacy after porn addiction has damaged a marriage

Whether you’re a husband struggling with porn, or a wife trying to understand and heal from betrayal, this episode offers practical tools, deep compassion, and real hope for change.

If you’re searching for:

how to stop watching porn

porn addiction help for men

pornography addiction recovery in marriage

overcome porn addiction permanently

…then this episode will show you what real freedom looks like — not as a “cure,” but as the predictable result of emotional healing, skill-building, and relationship repair.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Today we dive deep into the real reason men relapse when sexual energy builds — and it’s not just about willpower.

If you've been battling porn addiction, you’ve likely tried to resist, suppress, and distract yourself every time an urge to watch porn surfaces. But what if that strategy is actually setting you up to fail?

This episode uncovers why the common “dam approach” — where you try to hold back your sexual urges through deprivation — often leads to more pressure, anxiety, and eventual porn relapses.

Instead, we explore two proven frameworks that help men break free from the binge/guilt/shame cycle and experience long-term porn addiction recovery.

We tell the story of two men:

One who used pornography to escape emotional pain like shame, rejection, and loneliness...

And one who faced habitual urges and sexual energy late at night, even after he had removed his triggers...

Both learned how to stop using porn as a coping mechanism and finally felt in control again.

In this episode, you'll learn:

   Why deprivation often causes anxiety and increases the risk of porn relapses

   How to understand what’s really driving your urge to watch porn — emotional pain vs. physical arousal

    How to use mindfulness and redirection to handle urges without suppression or shame

    A question that instantly grounds you when you're triggered: “What else in my environment is interesting right now?”

   How to finally stop the cycle of white-knuckling, slipping, and starting over again

This episode is for you if you want to:

If you're ready to stop fighting against your urges and finally start understanding and resolving them at the root, this episode will give you the clarity and tools you’ve been missing.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Sexual intimacy is often times badly damaged after discovering a pornography addiction. 

There are fears, feelings of inadequacy, triggers, and painful feeling that go along with intimacy as a result of pornography use.

In this episode I'll share with you three ways you can improve your intimacy, how to handle triggers, and ways to have conversations together that actually are productive and bring some closure and reassurance.

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Struggling with porn urges that seem to come out of nowhere?

You’ll learn how to identify what’s actually driving the urge — whether it’s stress, loneliness, boredom, emotional pain, or habit. Because not every urge is the same. And if you're trying to fix all of them with the same tool, you're probably staying stuck.

We’ll walk through the 3 types of porn triggers — emotional, habitual, and physical — and how to tell the difference. Most importantly, you'll learn how to apply the right tool for the right trigger so you can finally stop feeling powerless.

This Episode Covers:

The truth about what’s underneath most porn urges

Why “just stop” never works for long

The difference between an emotional trigger and a habit loop

How to know when it’s real sexual desire vs. escape

Why understanding the root cause is the fastest path to freedom

How to map out your personal porn addiction pattern

Tools to interrupt the urge and get back in control

Why some guys stay stuck in relapse cycles (and how to break out)

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

Whenever there is a struggle with porn addiction, there's often dishonesty. And that is one of the most damaging elements to a marriage, but if you are going to eliminate it completely, you must understand the reason why it's continuing to happen.

Lying is a symptom of something deeper, and once you discover it and get the tools to resolve it, the dishonesty goes away.

In this episode I share with you some tools for both him and her in order to remove any blocks that make being honest difficult. 

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

This episode is about what happens when a husband has stopped using porn, is trying to do better, but his wife still doesn’t trust him. He says the right things. He tries to be supportive. But she’s triggered, shut down, or angry — and nothing he says seems to help.

This is a common part of porn addiction recovery in marriage. Even when the behavior stops, the pain doesn’t go away right away. Wives often carry deep fears after porn use, and their nervous systems stay on high alert. In this episode, listeners will learn why that happens and what to do about it.

What This Episode Covers:

Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use?

Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/ 

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here: 

[email protected]

Episode show notes:

If you’ve stopped watching pornography but your wife still struggles to trust you, you’re not alone — and you’re not broken. One of the hardest parts of porn addiction recovery isn’t just quitting porn… it’s rebuilding safety, connection, and intimacy in your marriage after betrayal.

In this episode, we dive deep into why your wife’s walls may still be up even after you’ve started healing from pornography addiction — and why that’s normal. We’ll explore what’s happening underneath her hesitation, what she needs to feel safe again, and how you can rebuild trust without pressuring her or “proving” yourself constantly.

You’ll learn:

Why wives often stay guarded even after their husband stops watching porn

How porn betrayal impacts safety, intimacy, and connection in marriage

Why stopping porn isn’t enough to rebuild trust — and what actually creates healing

Practical ways to rebuild closeness without shame, pressure, or defensiveness

How consistent actions, not promises, restore trust during porn addiction recovery

This episode is for you if you’ve ever thought:

“I’ve quit porn, why doesn’t she believe me yet?”

“I’m working so hard, but she still feels distant.”

“How do we heal our marriage after porn addiction and betrayal?”

Whether you’re early in your journey of overcoming porn addiction or you’ve been rebuilding for months, this episode will help you:

Understand what’s really happening when her walls stay up

Learn how to create genuine emotional safety

Rebuild connection in your marriage without shortcuts or pressure

Heal together as you recover from pornography

Porn addiction recovery isn’t just about removing pornography — it’s about restoring trust, intimacy, and safety. If you’ve been working on change but still feel disconnected, this conversation will help you see what’s missing and what to focus on next.