Dear Little Me

Can you heal from childhood neglect?

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For much of Mandy's childhood, she was completely alone.  Abandoned by a mother who was working and trying to put food on the table, Mandy was left in some very unsafe situations.  And it got worse.  Mandy was a little girl lost.  She had absolutely nobody on her side.  And when Mandy decided it was time to finally speak up for herself the consequences were dire.  Mandy has been through more trauma than most humans will ever understand.  At her lowest point she was suicidal and yet her spirit was strong.  Mandy spent years in talk therapy but felt she was not healing in the way she wanted to.  When Mandy finally sought out Somatic Experiencing Therapy, which is healing through the body, she was able to spend a couple of years really processing the anger that resulted from her boundaries being constantly broken, of not being cared for, of not being seen or protected. Mandy says spending two years in Somatic Experiencing was equal to twenty years worth of talk therapy.  *TRIGGER WARNING THIS EPISODE CONTAINS THEMES OF SUICIDE AND SEXUAL ABUSE**

You can find Mandy on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mandylharvey/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/mandy.harvey.3551 and her website https://mandylharvey.com/

If you have a story to share for this podcast please connect with me at www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

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How do you reach out to a friend who is struggling?

It takes just ONE person to make a difference.  ONE person to connect, understand, offer kindness, care and love.

When Amanda was 16 she was already at rock bottom. She had grown up in a home where she was abandoned by her mother and physically abused by her step-father. She had been suicidal and self-harming. She was taking drugs and alcohol and had run away from home. In this quick chat I am hearing how a kid who was totally lost, abandoned and alone, turned her life around through the kindness of ONE person.  

You can find Amanda on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/kickasswithbothfeet/ and facebook https://www.facebook.com/TheRealAmandaGold

If you have a story to share for this podcast please connect with me at www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

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How to heal from trauma.

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Trauma affects everything. In this very important episode I am speaking with Jamie McCoy, Psychotherapist and Trauma Coach.  In her twenties, Jamie was literally bed-ridden with brain fog, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and eventually receiving a diagnosis of Lyme disease.  Jamie healed herself by healing her nervous system. If you experienced childhood trauma your nervous system was affected by that trauma.  From your earliest days as a baby, if you were crying a lot and your parents didn't come to tend to you, hold that space for you or let you know they were there for you?  You will have shut down and gone into a mobilised frozen state to protect yourself from that pain.  And once you have shut down, your immune function is affected. Your digestion is affected. Everything goes into energy conservation mode.  Everything is slowing down. And then over time, different neuronal connections you are supposed to make in your brain don't develop in an organised fashion. So the left and right parts of your brain aren't necessarily communicating as they should. And when that happens, you will have gaps in your development, a lower capacity for stress and the way you tolerate life changes in general.

You can work with Jamie by contacting her via her Instagram https://www.instagram.com/myintegrativetherapist/ and you should definitely take a look at her course The Nervous System Reset here https://www.myintegrativetherapist.com/apply

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. 

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How can you move forward?  How can you let it go?  In this quick chat episode I am hearing body mind and somatic healer Sarah Harvey talking about some of the realisations she had when she first began healing from her trauma. Sarah was chronically ill for many years and she describes a point in time where she began to let people in, and she heard from these new teachers and guides about her purpose, her personal power and the choices she could make for herself in order to heal and live an empowering life.

You can find Sarah via her linktree https://linktr.ee/iamsarahharveyInstagram and instagram https://www.instagram.com/iamsarahharvey/

If you have a story to share for this podcast please connect with me at www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

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Who is most likely to sexually abuse a child?

Diane grew up on a farm. There were ponies and music lessons and she loved the animals and being outside in nature. Diane's parents were incredibly busy with four kids and running the farm and Diane felt she only got their attention when she was really good or really bad. Unseen and unheard Diane didn't feel love or connection as a child. And at the age of 12 a family member began to sexually abuse her. He told her they were in a secret relationship, he made her feel special and grown up and as a child, Diane believed what she was told. And she didn't tell anybody. It wasn't until many years later that Diane was able to share her secret and start getting help. This has been a long and difficult healing journey. 93% of perpetrators of CSA are known to the child. This is a staggering statistic. It is not men in white vans. It is most likely somebody within the family.

You can connect with Diane on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/ffs.trauma/ 

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. It's NEW!

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How can you tell if someone is a narcissist?

I asked this question of Nicole who is a Narcissistic Abuse Expert and she tells us everything we need to know in this quick chat episode.

You can find Nicole on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/coaching_with_nicole/ and her website Healingthewound.org

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. It's NEW!

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Who is most likely to sexually abuse a child?

Diane grew up on a farm. There were ponies and music lessons and she loved the animals and being outside in nature. Diane's parents were incredibly busy with four kids and running the farm and Diane felt she only got their attention when she was really good or really bad. Unseen and unheard Diane didn't feel love or connection as a child. And at the age of 12 a family member began to sexually abuse her. He told her they were in a secret relationship, he made her feel special and grown up and as a child, Diane believed what she was told. And she didn't tell anybody. It wasn't until many years later that Diane was able to share her secret and start getting help. This has been a long and difficult healing journey. 93% of perpetrators of CSA are known to the child. This is a staggering statistic. It is not men in white vans. It is most likely somebody within the family. 

You can connect with Diane on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/ffs.trauma/ 

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. It's NEW!

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What trauma does to a child.

It shouldn't hurt to be a child.  But it so often does.  Children everywhere, just scraping by.  Just surviving emotionally, physically, mentally.  In chaotic homes.  With traumatised parents, mentally ill parents.  Parents who were narcissistic, drug addicted, alcoholic, abusive, manipulative, who didn’t care whether their child lived or died.  Who never put them first. 

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. It's NEW!

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Should I go no contact with my mother?

Sharon's relationship with her mom growing was okay. But that relationship deteriorated rapidly when Sharon became an adult. Sharon has lost two brothers and she has grieved their loss. Her mother is alive and well, but she has also grieved the loss of her mother because Sharon decided that it was in the best interests of herself and her kids to go no contact. Sharon has been through a great deal of trauma in her lifetime and she has written a book on this journey to healing called Unmasking The Past https://amzn.to/3E5yx97 where Sharon she explains how much she has overcome through the power of resilience.  Sharon also holds beautiful art retreats for women where she holds a calm space to create & relax https://artfulnessretreats.com.au/retreats-workshops/ You can also find her on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/artfulness_retreats/ and facebook https://www.facebook.com/ArtfulnessRetreats

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share. It's NEW!

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When life is hard, what do you crave?  To lessen the pain?  To make it feel better again?  A glass of wine?  Some chocolate?  Shopping therapy?  

What do cravings ACTUALLY mean?  

If you have a story to share for this podcast or want to connect with me, dm me on www.instagram.com/mybigloveproject or send an email to [email protected].  I would LOVE! to connect with you.

>>Please join my FREE group https://www.facebook.com/groups/438110904159978/?ref=share.  

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