Over It And On With It

EP 462: It's Not Your Fault with Mia


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In this episode of Over It and On With It, Christine Hassler coaches Mia, who struggles with self-blame and guilt following a challenging divorce. Mia's feelings of inadequacy and self-loathing stem from a history of emotional abuse and neglect in her childhood, compounded by her recent breakup. 

 

Christine provides a compassionate and insightful discussion, helping Mia recognize that her pain is not her fault and offering strategies to address deep-seated beliefs and patterns. The episode aims to support listeners who might feel responsible for their suffering and struggle to break free from negative self-perceptions.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you struggle to move past events because you believe it's your fault?
  • Are you stuck in a pattern of self-blame and self-loathing that prevents you from healing?
  • Did you grow up in an environment where you felt neglected or abused, leading you to believe you deserve lousy treatment?
  • Are you aware of any patterns of gaslighting or unhealthy relationships in your life?
  • Do you find it challenging to let go of beliefs and thinking patterns that aren't serving you?

 

The Guest's Key Insights & A-HA's:

  • Mia's self-blame and feelings of inadequacy are deeply rooted in her childhood experiences with a narcissistic family system.
  • The belief that she deserves to be treated poorly is a result of internalizing abusive and neglectful behavior from her parents.
  • Christine highlights that Mia's recent breakup and the blame placed on her by her ex-husband are symptoms of unresolved trauma and not reflective of her worth.
  • The episode underscores the importance of differentiating between childhood trauma and current situations to avoid projecting past pain onto present circumstances.

 

How to Get Over It & On With It:

  • Recognize and challenge the old beliefs stemming from childhood trauma that are influencing your current self-perception.
  • Engage in physical and emotional grounding techniques, such as standing with feet on the floor and deep breathing, to reconnect with your sense of power and presence.
  • Seek trauma-informed therapy and inner child work to address and heal from past abuse and neglect.
  • Write down the facts of your situation to distinguish between reality and distorted beliefs.
  • Affirm that the abuse and neglect you experienced were not your fault and that you are worthy of love and respect.

 

Upcoming Events:

  • Christine Hassler's upcoming retreat at the end of September 2024. Early bird pricing is available until the end of August. Register at christinehassler.com/retreat.
  • Free coaching call on July 31st focused on reducing stress and anxiety. Sign-up at christinehassler.com/freeworkshop.

 

Resources:

  • Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment
  • Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
  • Christine on Facebook
  • Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
  • @ChristinHassler on Twitter
  • @ChristineHassler on Instagram
  • @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
  • [email protected]
  • [email protected] — For information on any of my services
  • Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
  • Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
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Over It And On With ItBy Christine Hassler

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