Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

ERP 486: Breaking the Blame Loop: Forgiveness as a Path to Deeper Intimacy — An Interview with Dara McKinley


Listen Later

About this Episode

Are you stuck in a cycle of blame and resentment, wondering why forgiveness feels so elusive even though everyone says it's the key to inner peace? Many of us hear that forgiving others will set us free, but when we try to let go of anger or seek justice for betrayals and hurts, practical steps are hard to find and genuine relief can feel out of reach. What if forgiveness isn't just about pardoning or forgetting, but something deeper—something that could pave the way to real healing and even deeper intimacy?

In this episode, listeners are invited to re-examine forgiveness from a fresh, practical, and spiritual perspective. Instead of relying on vague promises or traditional definitions, the conversation delves into tangible steps for breaking out of the blame loop, nurturing the parts of ourselves most in need, and using unconditional love as a powerful tool for restoration. Whether you're dealing with everyday resentments in a long-term partnership or coping with a profound betrayal, you'll walk away with actionable insights and a renewed sense of personal empowerment to move from conflict to true connection.

After studying psychology and alternative spirituality for most of her life, an unlikely turn of events pointed Dara McKinley toward the forgiveness path. Examined through the lens of her previous knowledge, she discovered that forgiveness is actually much bigger than one's ability to pardon as well as a healing modality. Feeling called to help those deterred by mainstream forgiveness definitions, today Dara guides people beyond popular forgiveness understandings and into a practical spiritual process that restores peace.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. Episode Highlights 

07:02 How mainstream forgiveness definitions can fall short.

11:28 Vindictive energy, justice, and the personal cost of resentment.

14:40 Dara's turning point: Discovering a practical forgiveness path.

17:12 Redefining forgiveness beyond pardoning and mainstream expectations.

20:13 Spiritual versus relational love: Navigating conditional and unconditional experiences.

24:09 Three sources of love.

27:19 A journey of self-responsibility and tender attention to the inner wound.

31:13 Practical steps for applying unconditional love to inner healing.

33:51 The negative narrative loop and how forgiveness restores personal power.

36:00 Forgiveness as an alchemical process and shifting perspectives in relationships.

39:59 A case study on resentment and forgiveness in long-term partnerships.

44:50 Boundaries, agreements, and the transformational effects of love.

Mentioned

The Space Between: The Point of Connection (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book)

Shifting Criticism For Connected Communication

Connect with Dara McKinley

Websites: howtoforgive.com | daramckinley.com

Facebook: facebook.com/DaraMckinley108

Instagram: instagram.com/daramckinley/?hl=en

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 

Website: drjessicahiggins.com  

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like it to be discussed, please contact us by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here. 

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. 

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here

Thank you!  

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And GuideBy Dr. Jessica Higgins

  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8

4.8

138 ratings


More shows like Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

View all
Relationship Advice by Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich

Relationship Advice

1,679 Listeners

The Terri Cole Show by Terri Cole

The Terri Cole Show

1,400 Listeners

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby by Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

825 Listeners

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson by Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

2,504 Listeners

The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair by Michelle Chalfant

The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair

1,541 Listeners

The Couples Therapist Couch by Shane Birkel

The Couples Therapist Couch

285 Listeners

The Mark Groves Podcast by Mark Groves

The Mark Groves Podcast

4,729 Listeners

Relationships Made Easy by Dr. Abby Medcalf

Relationships Made Easy

472 Listeners

Relationship Renovation: Marriage Advice, Intimacy & Couples Communication by EJ and Tarah Kerwin

Relationship Renovation: Marriage Advice, Intimacy & Couples Communication

169 Listeners

The One Inside: An Internal Family Systems (IFS) podcast by Tammy Sollenberger

The One Inside: An Internal Family Systems (IFS) podcast

288 Listeners

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS by Jessica Da Silva, LMFT

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS

278 Listeners

Heal Your Heartbreak by Break Up Bestie

Heal Your Heartbreak

633 Listeners

Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon by Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

287 Listeners

On Attachment by Stephanie Rigg

On Attachment

1,041 Listeners

Jillian on Love by Jillian Turecki | QCODE

Jillian on Love

1,381 Listeners