#342: The word "codependent" is everywhere - on book covers (even mine), in therapy sessions, in conversations about relationships. But there's something fundamentally wrong with how we use this label. 

If you recognize yourself in patterns of people-pleasing, emotional caretaking, or losing yourself in other people's chaos, I want you to know something important: You're not broken. You're not diseased. And you're definitely not codependent. What you are is brilliantly adaptive.

Join me this week as I share why I'm moving away from the term "codependent" and offer a new framework that honors your nervous system's intelligence while creating space for growth.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/342

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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Pre-order your copy of Emotional Outsourcing from Barnes & Noble between September 3rd and September 5th, and you'll get 25% off! Just use the code PREORDER25 at checkout. This special online-only offer is the perfect opportunity to snag the book at a great price before it’s officially released.

Even better, if you're a Barnes & Noble Premium Member, you'll receive an additional 10% discount automatically applied at checkout, making this an amazing deal you don't want to miss.

Secure your copy today and be one of the first to read this highly anticipated book: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/end-emotional-outsourcing-beatriz-victoria-albina-np-mph-sep/1147732180?ean=9781538766439

You can spot when someone's being lousy to other people from 3 miles away. You're like an emotional bloodhound who knows when your friend is lying, when your coworker is stressed, when your mom is about to lose it. But when someone hurts you, you suddenly need a jury of 12 of your peers to confirm that what just happened was actually messed up and maybe it's okay for you to be hurt.

This habit of emotional outsourcing at its most painful means you're literally giving away your right to trust your own experience and handing it over to the person who hurt you, random friends, or the internet.

This is such a crucial part of what I teach in my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing. In the book, you'll learn about the nervous system science behind why you doubt yourself, plus, of course, somatic body-based practices to help you reconnect with your body's wisdom.

Pre-order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ and get beautiful bonuses to begin this work today.

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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#341: If you've ever found yourself constantly scanning other people's faces for approval, shapeshifting to keep the peace, or feeling completely disconnected from what you actually want, this episode is for you. You might call this people-pleasing or being too sensitive, but something much more profound is going on here: you’re living with emotional outsourcing.

Tune in this week as I explain how emotional outsourcing gets stored in your body as a procedural memory - not just a thought you can talk yourself out of. You'll learn how this adaptation develops early, gets reinforced by cultural systems, and shows up in your body.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/341

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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Your value isn't in your productivity. That uncomfortable feeling when you stop moving, stop doing, stop managing everyone else's life? That's not laziness talking. It's the voice of a nervous system that learned early on that being needed equals being safe.

Your actual people want you to rest. They want you to have needs, wants, preferences. They want to take care of you sometimes too. And all of this is exactly what I break down in my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing.

Pre-order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ and get beautiful bonuses to begin this work today.

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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#340: Have you ever caught yourself saying, “I'm fine,’’ when you're actually anything but fine? Maybe you're getting everything done - crushing it at work, maintaining relationships, keeping up appearances - but feeling disconnected from it all. Like you're watching your life play out from behind a glass wall.

This isn't just you being "too in your head" or "not trying hard enough to feel." This is your nervous system's brilliant (but outdated) protection mechanism called functional freeze.

Join me today as I revisit functional freeze: the nervous system state I see most often in people living with emotional outsourcing patterns. We’ll explore what functional freeze really is and why it's not your fault, how to recognize when you're in it, and why understanding this pattern is the first step to breaking free.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/340

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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This bonus episode explores how childhood messages about being "too much" create lifelong patterns of self-shrinking that affect every area of your life. When you spend years making yourself smaller to fit other people's comfort levels, you lose track of where you end and their expectations begin.

But what if I told you that's a lie? What if I told you that the right people are starving for your realness? What if I told you that your "too much" is actually someone else's "just right?" What if you're not too much at all? What if you've just been around people who are too small for your bigness?

This is exactly why I wrote End Emotional Outsourcing, to help you stop apologizing for who you are and start celebrating your fullest self.

Pre-order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ and get beautiful bonuses to begin this work today.

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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#339: You were doing the best you could with what you knew at the time. That's the truth that so many of us struggle to accept when we look back at our past decisions - the relationships we stayed in too long, the boundaries we didn't set, the times we said yes when we meant no. 

There's this part of us that believes if we're mean enough to ourselves about these choices, we won't make them again. But here's what science tells us: beating yourself up doesn't create change.

This episode explores why compassion for your past self is essential for creating real, lasting change. Listen in today to discover how hating who you used to be blocks growth, and why being kind to your past self isn't about excusing behaviors or pretending everything was perfect.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/339

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If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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There's this bone-deep fatigue that seeps into you when you've been performing yourself for everyone else instead of living your life for you. It's different from being tired after a busy day. It's the exhaustion that comes from constantly calculating what version of yourself the room needs.

Meanwhile, real love doesn't require a costume. No tap dancing required for real, true, authentic, grounded, open-hearted love, love, love.

That's what my book, End Emotional Outsourcing, is all about: helping you take off the mask and discover that this big, messy world needs the real you, not the performing you. And I cannot wait to share my new book with you, where I'll teach you all about it.

Pre-order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ and get beautiful bonuses to begin this work today.

Mentioned in this episode:

Join Anchored!

If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

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#338: Shame is one of the most powerful forces keeping us stuck in emotional outsourcing, and we don’t talk about it nearly enough. This invisible force runs so deep that we often don't even realize it's guiding our thoughts, feelings, and actions.

My book, End Emotional Outsourcing was born from my search for a shame-free, inclusive, feminist framework to name these patterns, and to begin healing them. If you’ve ever felt like your habits made you broken or unworthy, this conversation is for you.

Join me this week as I explore the complex relationship between shame, the nervous system, and emotional outsourcing - three interconnected forces that keep us locked in patterns of codependency, perfectionism, and people-pleasing.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/338

Mentioned in this episode:

Join Anchored!

If you’re ready to break away from anxiety and codependent relationships so you can live a life of joy and confidence, Anchored is for you. This is my 6-month high-touch, high-results coaching program, and we’re currently enrolling.

Join Anchored