Dr. Rob and Tami talk about what to do when you’ve caught your addict watching some really uncomfortable and ethically questionable porn. They also discuss how betrayed spouses can move through grief and forgiveness in a healthy way without holding on to resentment. All this and more in this week’s episode! 

 

TAKEAWAYS:

[:35] Caught my husband watching incest porn. What do I do? 

[2:15] You need to find a specialist in this field and not a general therapist. 

[3:40] I’ve lost a lot. As the betrayed partner, I’m going through grief, how do I forgive? 

[6:10] Where are you in the stages of forgiveness? It takes time to grieve and forgive.

[9:00] My husband has been sober for 2 years, but I still don’t trust him. 

[13:30] The opposite of love is not hate. If you still love them, you’re passionately engaged. Opposite of love is indifference.

[15:15] If you leave, do the work you need to do to heal. 

[17:00] How important is community as part of your recovery process?

[20:15] You need to lean into others to find true healing. 

[22:15] Finding the right home group is much like dating. 

[25:20] Is it normal for sex addicts to be exhibitists? 

 

RESOURCES:

Seekingintegrity.com

Email Tami: [email protected]

Sexandrelationshiphealing.com

Intherooms.com

Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss

Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss