Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking),You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

—Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

—Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

In this powerful and vulnerable episode, we explore how shame, one of the most corrosive human emotions, can shape our lives and fuel destructive behaviors like alcohol use. Colleen explains how shame works like an autoimmune disorder for the soul—turning us against ourselves and making us feel unworthy. She delves into the mental constructs that fuel the shame narrative and teaches us how to shift from self-judgment to self-acceptance. Colleen also shares a deeply personal story from her past to illustrate how shame can linger and how we can process it using a three-step framework for healing.

Whether you're struggling with a drinking habit or just want to learn how to heal old emotional wounds, this episode offers actionable tools to help you move forward with dignity and self-respect.

Key Topics Covered:

1. The Nature of Shame

   • Shame as an "autoimmune emotion"—turning self against self.

   • How shame leads us to identify ourselves as the problem rather than looking at behaviors or circumstances neutrally.

   • The mental constructs that fuel shame: right vs. wrong, worthy vs. unworthy, acceptable vs. unacceptable.

2. Neutralizing Polarities

   • How viewing things in extremes (good vs. bad) intensifies shame.

   • The importance of accepting situations as they are—without judgment—to process and heal shame.

3. Personal Story: A Shame Wound from the Past

   • Colleen shares a story from her early teaching career where she made a mistake that caused lasting shame.

   • How avoidance, justification, and self-judgment kept the shame active for years.

   • Why acknowledging the full truth, without justifying or minimizing, is essential to healing.

4. Three-Step Framework for Processing Shame:

   • Step 1: It Could Have Been Worse

   • Acknowledge that while the situation wasn't ideal, it could have been more harmful.

   • This perspective helps reduce the emotional charge.

   • Step 2: I Am Innocent

   • Accept that you were doing the best you could with the tools you had at the time.

   • Hold space for conflicting truths—you can make a mistake and still be a good person.

   • Step 3: Be Your Own Advocate

   • Extend dignity and self-respect to yourself.

   • Recognize that your body lives in the present moment and does not deserve punishment for a past story.

5. The Path to Emotional Sobriety

   • Learning to hold space for your whole truth without demonizing or glorifying.

   • Why avoiding or skipping over shame only perpetuates it.

   • How emotional safety with yourself is the foundation for true healing.

Actionable Homework:

1. Bring Shame into Consciousness

   • Recall a past experience that still triggers emotional pain.

   • Allow yourself to feel the discomfort without turning away.

2. Apply the Three Steps:

   • It could have been worse.

   • I am innocent; I did the best I could with what I knew.

   • I deserve dignity and self-respect.

3. Practice Self-Compassion

   • Put your hand on your heart and tell yourself: "I see you. I feel you. I'm not going to abandon you."

Quote of the Episode: "The path to healing your shame is not about building a stronger defense. It's about dropping the defense altogether and saying, 'This is what it is, and I accept the whole truth.'"

Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking),You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

—Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

—Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

Key Insights & Takeaways:

1. Human Superpower: Imagination & Creation

   • Humans live in a world of mental constructs. Time, money, rules, and even identities are creations of the human mind.

   • Meaning doesn't exist in nature—we assign meaning to events and outcomes, deciding whether they are triumphs or tragedies.

2. Manifestation & Attention

   • Manifestation starts with an idea. What you focus on grows, and what you neglect dies.

   • To manifest something new, you must first believe it's possible and give it your attention.

   • Your brain is a tool that finds or creates evidence for what you believe. If you believe you have a problem, your brain will collect proof of that problem.

3. How You Manifested a "Drinking Problem"

   • It started with the idea that your drinking is a problem, and your brain went to work gathering evidence.

   • Over time, your focus on drinking as a problem created a tangible reality with hangovers, conflicts, and negative emotions.

4. Reframing & Manifesting a New Reality

   • To manifest a healthy relationship with alcohol, start by paying attention to small wins where you are already in control.

   • Examples of wins include:

   • Waking up in the morning and not wanting a drink.

   • Going through your day without drinking.

   • Choosing not to drink and drive.

5. Hangover Homework

   • When experiencing a hangover, walk back through your memories of the previous night and find moments when you had a thought or impulse to stop drinking.

   • Those thoughts, however fleeting, are wins—proof that you're capable of making different choices.

   • Paying attention to these positive moments reinforces the idea that you can have a healthy relationship with alcohol.

6. A Success Story: Rehearsing a Different Ending

   • Colleen shares a personal story of noticing a pattern, mentally rehearsing a better choice, and successfully manifesting a different outcome the next time.

   • By reflecting on past wins, you can prime your brain to respond differently in similar situations.

Homework Assignment:

1. Take 5 minutes to list all the times and ways you've demonstrated control over your drinking. Include moments when you weren't drinking, times you limited your intake, and any positive actions related to alcohol.

2. Next time you have a hangover, reflect on the moments when you had the thought to stop or reduce your drinking, even if you didn't act on it. Count those moments as wins.

3. Check out the Mindful Drinking course and listen to the episode titled Hangover Homework for a deeper dive into this exercise.

Final Thoughts: Manifesting a healthier relationship with alcohol starts with paying attention to the right thoughts. Focus on what's working, notice the small wins, and train your brain to manifest the solution rather than the problem.

Are you a disciplined, ambitious grown-ass woman who still battles self-sabotaging urges?

That's normal if you're living in survival mode. When you consistently push yourself to the brink of burnout, your subconscious pushes back. Which is why it gets harder and harder to resist your favorite unhealthy coping mechanisms.

But feeling embarrassed, frustrated and disappointed in ourselves, and worrying that other people will find out we're not the person we're pretending to be, only makes it worse.

There comes a point in every woman's life where she has to choose between performing as expected and getting radically honest about what she really needs and wants.

My guest today is Ella Lucas Averett, founder of multiple successful businesses and host of the wildly popular On Air with Ella podcast.

We're talking about the intersection between professional and personal development. And how the breakthrough you're looking for is on the other side of the breakdown you're desperately trying to avoid.

Listen to On Air with Ella and find Ella on social media @onairwithella

—Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

—If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

—Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

Do you feel like it's impossible to get ahead financially because life always seems to cost more than you actually have?

If you're living in survival mode–buy now and worry later, you already know that overspending is a slippery slope that traps you in a cycle of debt and makes you feel guilty about everything you buy.

It's a mistake to assume that living on a budget is restrictive and that convenience and luxury items are incompatible with financial discipline. In reality, spending money to make your life better is the secret to living in abundance.

My guest today is Rachel Coons, financial expert, mom of four and host of the Money Moms podcast. She's here to show you how to save hundreds and even thousands of dollars every month on groceries (without sacrificing quality). And share her practical strategies for paying down high-interest credit cards and making extra money without actually getting a second job.

You'll walk away feeling motivated and inspired to take control over your money so it's no longer controlling you.

Find Rachel on social media @heyrachelcoons

—Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

—If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

—Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

Do you dismiss your heart-felt ambitions because going after what you really want feels impossible?

It's easy to go for broke when you have nothing to lose. But when you've worked your ass off to get where you are, the idea of taking a risk can seem childish and unrealistic.

Which is why so many of us end up drinking too much despite having enviable lives. We become stagnant, uninspired and trapped by our own choices. And then feel resentful of loved ones who depend on us as if it's their fault for holding us back.

But women are doing some pretty badass things these days. And as long as you believe you're too old, too tired or otherwise incapable, you're never going to know what it's like to be one of them.

My guest today is Gail Taylor. After surviving childhood trauma and addiction, she became a successful financial advisor. And then, at age 60, completely reinvented her career as a musician, author and keynote speaker.

You'll walk away from this episode with an inspiring perspective on much fun it can be to just fucking go for it.

Find Gail on social media @gailtaylormusic and gailtaylormusic.com

What daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

Colleen teaches intuitive drinking to high achieving professional women who want to reduce their alcohol consumption by 80 percent. If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth, click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

Are you constantly doing "the work" to improve yourself and wondering when you'll go from being "almost there" to feeling like you've actually arrived?

We're taught that success comes in pretty, perfect packages and demands extraordinary amounts of effort. And so we vacillate between feeling frustrated and exhausted and trying to stay positive with affirmations, vision boards and goal setting.

But the difference between struggling to get what you want and actually getting it is not how much discipline and willpower you have. It's in your ability to feel like someone who is already living the life of her dreams–before those dreams have manifested into reality.

My guest today is Law of Attraction Coach Alleah Friedrichs. She's here to share her story of how she went from suffering panic attacks because she had over a quarter of a million dollars in debt to being a millionaire living with ease and abundance within 18 months.

You'll learn the difference between knowing about manifestation and actually practicing it. And walk away with simple action steps that will cause immediate and measurable changes in your life.

—Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

—Get Alleah's free money manifestation meditation and find her on social media @lawofattraction_alleah

—If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

—Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

How much time, energy and money have you spent on talk-therapy and medications trying to deal with your anxiety?

Most people (doctors included) think anxiety is caused by a combination of genetics and stressful or traumatic events. It's a thinking problem that must be understood before it can be solved. So we spend countless hours combing through childhood traumas, assessing attachment styles and experimenting with substances to balance our brain chemistry.

With nothing to show for it. Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health diagnosis in the United States.

But anxiety isn't in your head, as most people assume. There is an alarm going off in your nervous system that causes overwhelming sensations of fight or flight, doom and gloom. The brain is simply projecting those feelings into whatever you're thinking about.

Healing anxiety requires you to address the root cause, which is the full-body, present-moment experience in your nervous system—not the story you're telling yourself about why you feel the way you feel.

Dr. Russell Kennedy is here to explain where anxiety lives in your body and how to use simple, somatic practices to create a sense of safety and calm in your nervous system so that you are no longer held hostage by your own mind.

What daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

Find Dr. Russ on social media @theanxietymd

Dr. Russell Kennedy, BSc, MD, RYT, also known as "The Anxiety MD," is a visionary physician in the field of anxiety disorders. With a diverse background in medicine, neuroscience, developmental psychology, yoga, meditation, and stand-up comedy, he has redefined the understanding and treatment of anxiety from both scientific and humanistic perspectives. Much of his work is based on overcoming his own lifelong battle with chronic, crippling worry, creating the award winning and best-selling book Anxiety Rx, the Anxiety Rx podcast, and more recently MBRX, a step by step mind-body program designed to permanently heal anxiety. Dr. Kennedy is empowering individuals from all over the world to overcome anxiety and embrace a life of calm and fulfillment.

Do you ever feel like you know exactly what you should be doing but you just can't get yourself to do it?

Most of us have learned to get what we want by setting clear and specific goals and then using metrics to judge our success. We focus on changing the numbers–obsessing over how much we weigh, how much we drink or how much money we have in the bank.

But even when we achieve the goal, our motivation to keep making an effort eventually fades. And we feel increasingly disappointed, frustrated and helpless as our progress slips away–like we're doomed for failure.

Dr. Kyra Bobinet, MD, MPH is a behavior change designer who is here to share her ground-breaking research on how the brain responds to the illusion of failure. You'll learn how to apply her Iterative Mindset to work with your brain so that you can access your inner wisdom, and liberate your motivation.

Click here to take Dr. Kyra's Iterative Mindset Quiz.

Click here to TAKE My QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

What daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

Are you curious to know if plant medicines like psilocybin and pharmaceuticals like naltrexone can reduce your cravings for alcohol?

For women who live and work in mainstream America, the fear of flying to Costa Rica for a psychedelic ceremony ranks right below the fear of telling your doctor how much you really drink.

And so we hide. Because the truth could cost us our career or our kids, force us into expensive rehabs and brand us as alcoholics for the rest of our lives.

Today I'm talking to Amy Devenny, a hairdresser turned activation coach who struggled for years to control her drinking. She's tried staying sober for years at a time, microdosing with psilocybin and most recently, taking naltrexone.

We're having a radically raw conversation about the steps we must take to help ourselves and what it really looks like to overcome alcohol use disorder.

For more information on how to access Naltrexone legally from a board-certified physician through the privacy of an on-line service, listen to It's Not About the Alcohol EP119 Is naltrexone effective in alcohol dependence?

Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem?

You might also enjoy EP25 Plant Medicines Psilocybin and Ayahuasca for Alcohol Use Disorder with Omar Pinto

Find Amy @amydevennyrocks on Instagram

What daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.

How do you feel about yourself when you wake up and realize you did it again?

If you get hangxiety and shameovers after drinking, it's not your relationship with alcohol that needs to change. It's your relationship with yourself.

The performance-based, perfectionistic mindset that fuels your success in other areas of your life also drives you into a cycle of self-sabotage.

Because when you beat yourself up for making a mistake, you shut off access to the part of the brain that learns from mistakes.

The solution to alcohol use disorder is a feeling…a feeling of confidence in your ability to learn. On today's episode, you'll learn:

• The exact mechanism that causes you to overdrink

• A step-by-step process to break the cycle of shame next time you wake up hungover

• Why the road to recovery must be paved with love, self-compassion and curiosity

What daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer

If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking), click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL WITH COLLEEN. You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life.