Open Late

In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess connects with Frank Smith, a queer writer and actor known for his work on the show "Open To It." Throughout their conversation, they delve into the origins of the show, discussing how it all began and the challenges they had to face along the way. As the discussion progresses, Jess and Frank touch upon personal aspects of his life, specifically when Frank and his partner made the decision to open up about his relationship. They explore the process of creating a show "Open To It" and how they handle filming intimate scenes, shedding light on the behind-the-scenes aspects of production. They talk about how the world reacted to the show's content and the impact it had on those who were a part of Frank's life. Frank opens up about how the show may have influenced or altered his relationship in some shape or form, sharing positive outcomes that arose from it. For those interested in watching "Open To It" and keeping up with upcoming events.

In this Episode of Open Late:

Mentioned in the Episode:

Please Like me - Television Comedy Drama: Please Like Me

Pleasure Podcast: Sex Talk With My Mom

On-Screen Intimacy Coordinator Shelby Terrell: Open Late Episode 85

Connect with Frank Smith:

• Instagram: @frank.arthur.smith

• Watch Open To It: https://www.opentoitseries.com/

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

2:31  I did write the first episode as a short film originally and submitted to a couple of competitions, where one literally said to me, this is too gay and too gross. I was like, okay, well, you know what? My show is too gay, and is too gross. And this is exactly what I'm going to do right now. – Frank Smith

4:52  a lot of times the way that we would communicate it or, you know, whether you're writing it or sharing your vision, you know, or even like putting together a whole storyboard, sometimes it's just not going to come to life for someone else, or it does in a way that's through their filter, through their lens. – Jessica Esfandiary

34:12 But I'm really proud of what we're doing. We've gotten the chance to showcase a lot of different types of people. We just had like in episode eight, we have a love interest and had a deaf director and an ASL interpreting crew, so I'm just really pleased with how we keep getting to showcase more and more people that are part of it. – Frank Smith

39:16 I just love hearing about these things when people who live sort of outside the box, being poly or whatever, being non-monogamous, coloring outside the lines all the time when you do something that's traditional. – Jessica Esfandiary

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this special episode of the Open Late Podcast, celebrating her 9-year anniversary, Jess recounts the heartwarming story of how she woke up that morning, and unexpectedly found herself in a surprise wedding, making her a married woman by the end of the day. She takes us back to the beginning of her relationship with Pasha, admitting that she initially thought he might only be a rebound after her last breakup. She also shares the touching moment when Pasha surprised her with a proposal, followed shortly after by an intimate and magical surprise wedding surrounded by their closest friends. She reflects 10 years back, and wonders what her response would have been if someone had asked her whether she believed she would be in an open, polyamorous relationship today.

In this Episode of Open Late:

Mentioned in the Episode: Pregnancy. Changes. Everything

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

1:47 The day that I woke up, the day that I got married. - Jessica Esfandiary

3:21 I had just gotten out of a three and a half year relationship that was really toxic, that was very limiting. It was stunting for my growth or my expression, for my sexuality. I just wanted fun and I probably wanted a little bit of danger, too, to be honest. And so he was ripe for the picking. - Jessica Esfandiary

3:45 We had a mutual friend that introduced us, and she actually forbade us from dating. So, I mean, that made the whole thing even hotter. - Jessica Esfandiary

7:08 I remember we had bought this journal and we decided that we would write to each other on our anniversary every year, and it was going to be a gift to each other back and forth. And we would do it for the whole time that we were together for the rest of our lives, apparently. I didn't know that. - Jessica Esfandiary

8:08 He proposes with this beautiful band and I instead say. Yes, there's like not a bone in my body that's confused about wanting to spend my life with this man. - Jessica Esfandiary

8:19 When we did decide to be together, it was like, this is my life partner. And that first year of our relationship was easy, breezy, beautiful, blissful. And you know, relationships don't last that way forever, especially long term committed ones. But that first year was incredible. - Jessica Esfandiary

18:12 When we officially started to date and there was exclusivity in our relationship. I knew that I would easily spend my life with this man and that he was the most driven and the most committed to his own growth. And that's what I was really looking for in a partner. And I didn't want to settle for less than crazy and love, which I was with him. - Jessica Esfandiary

19:13 If you asked me the night of my wedding, like, do you think that your relationship is open or do you think you're going to open it or do you think you'll be polyamorous? I didn't even know what polyamory was, so the answer would be no. - Jessica Esfandiary

20:29 That is the story of how I had a surprise wedding and I went to bed a married woman on a day that I woke up and I wasn't even engaged. So if you want to know who's the most confident man in the world and also who's the most spot on in the world, it's Pasha. - Jessica Esfandiary

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess continues her conversation with Irene Morning, the author of "The Polyamory Paradox." They delve into the topic of contemplating polyamory while understanding our personal triggers and its impact. Additionally, they discuss the importance of comprehending our partners' perspectives and avoiding pressuring them into “closing back the relationship”. Instead, encouraging open communication to address any issues that arise. They explore the concept of unsolvable problems that may arise in polyamorous relationships, as well as the feelings of isolation. They also explore the process of finding and building communities with like-minded individuals.

In this Episode of Open Late:

Connect with Irene Morning:

• Instagram: @irene_morning

• Book: The Polyamory Paradox

• Website:https://www.irenemorning.com/

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

2:05 Particularly from people who know that they have some amount of trauma in their history, who identify with a complex PTSD diagnosis or know that mental health has been a struggle for them of thinking I really love some of the concepts in polyamory and I love the things that I've read about it, but I'm so afraid that for me it's untenable because I'll just get too triggered. – Irene Morning

14:20 It makes me think about the monogamous relationships actually that I'm seeing transform based on some of these principles of non-monogamy that will never likely be non-monogamous, never open, but are using the tools of, like you know, seeing yourself as a whole person, being your partner as a whole person, and not expecting them to fill all your needs. – Jessica Esfandiary

15:00 I just love the idea that people will begin to use pleasure and intimacy and vulnerability and authenticity in ways that can open their relationship, just maybe not to other lovers, but just open their relationships, period, because that's like going to be such a beautiful world, probably totally like I'll be, you know, around for completely. – Jessica Esfandiary

31:41 What I need is more community around this. So can I give myself permission to actually just own that in some of these interactions and start to differentiate that out? I mean, it brings me back to the question of the beginning of like people anchoring into their why. I sometimes think as we evolve in this, we realize that our why for when we first start getting into non-monogamy is sometimes actually feeling like, okay, more relationships can fill this need for community that I didn't even realize was a need. – Irene Morning

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of Open Late Podcast, Jess again engages in an enlightening conversation with Irene Morning, a somatic coach, pleasure witch, intimacy educator, and the talented author behind "The Polyamory Paradox." Together, they talk deep into the world of Irene's creative process, unraveling the journey of how the book came to life. Irene's unique perspective and expertise shine through as she shares her insights on navigating polyamory and the intricacies of human emotions. Jessica openly shares her own personal experiences and the impact of both Irene's book and Irene on her journey. She highlights how the book has served as a roadmap, providing guidance and understanding in navigating polyamory and emotions.

In this Episode of Open Late:

Episode 56 mentioned in the episode: Mind, Body and Non-monogamy

Connect with Irene Morning:

• Instagram: @irene_morning

• Book: The Polyamory Paradox

• Website:https://www.irenemorning.com/

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

2:29 This is one of the most comprehend things, if not the most complete book to take you from the beginning, experiences through being able to live this way with as many tools as possible for any type of for any type of open relationship. - Jessica Esfandiary

4:04 I hope that the therapy scene is changing a little bit in corners of the therapy world. But I think that is one of the things where coaching gets to operate differently, where I don't necessarily have the same concerns professionally about self-disclosure, where I can tell my story more openly and not worry that that's going to interfere with my practice, but that actually it really supports my client. - Irene Morning

26:23 If you're going through a really challenging experience in non-monogamy and you're finding yourself really struggling in a big way and triggered in a way that interferes with doing work or maintaining relationships or having healthy sleep or getting proper nutrition, all of these kind of like basic regulation things, you are probably operating outside your window of tolerance. - Irene Morning

36:36 70% or 80% of the recurring arguments that couples have. That conflict is not actually something that they can resolve. So the objective when we're doing conflict resolution and conflict work in a relationship is not necessarily to fix the source of that conflict, but is to look at how we can communicate about it more effectively, how can we navigate the conflict more effectively? - Irene Morning

38:53 At the end of the day, your whole purpose and I think your goal as a human, just knowing you in your work is to grow and to constantly reclaim the parts of yourself that don't feel whole. Whether you can call that inner child healing or, you know, soul. - Jessica Esfandiary

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of Open Late Podcast, Jess connects with Carolina Salazar, a certified holistic health coach and hormone specialist from the Inner Growth Podcast. Together, they explore Carolina's inspiring journey that led her to become a holistic coach. Carolina candidly shares her personal story of struggling with body image and weight due to cultural differences, leading to an unhealthy relationship with her body. She opens up about her experience with obsessive exercise and unhealthy weight loss, reaching a breaking point that prompted her to make necessary changes. The discussion delves into the concept of orthorexia and Carolina's realization of swinging to the other extreme of "healthy" living, where she found herself judging others' food choices and living an extremely food-restrictive lifestyle. They touch on the importance of accepting parents for who they are and the societal pressure on women's appearance. They emphasize the significance of seeking help when needed.

In this Episode of Open Late:

Listen to Inner Growth Episode with Jessica: 

Growing from mushroom experiences and Exploring your Sexuality with Jess Esfandiary

Connect with Carolina Salazar:

• Instagram: @thecarolinalifestyle

• Podcast: Inner Growth Podcast

• Website:https://stan.store/thecarolinalifestyle

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

Quotes from this episode:

3:14  The world that we live in and all the conditions that are placed on us as women, on our bodies, on what we're supposed to look like, and how that kind of becomes our inner talk and it becomes the programming that we're fed. And then can sometimes lead to very toxic behavior. – Carolina Salazar

10:42 I think the trickiest part was the validation that I was receiving. As a society, we glorify weight loss. – Carolina Salazar

11:55 The backdrop of the conversation is about how people's weight is important to who they are and what they're worth. – Jessica Esfandiary

16:12  If you've been through a restrictive pattern or time of your life, breaking those restrictions can feel really scary. – Carolina Salazar

18:17 I started doing a big deep dive on this discomfort that I felt and the shame and the self-judgment and like how I was labeling foods as good or bad, and then feeling like there is this morality with food. And if I ate bad food, I was a bad person. – Carolina Salazar

28:56 Our emotional and energetic well-being is such a big part of our health. It's not just food and exercise, it's everything. – Carolina Salazar

29:48 I am done with letting restrictions and rules and this endless pursuit of looking a certain way or of fitting this societal standard of thinness, get in the way of my joy. – Carolina Salazar

43:31 It's not my job to change my parents' perspective because for them it's not an issue. – Jessica Esfandiary

44:36 Healing is like an onion. Layers and layers, ultimately getting to like a really strong core. – Carolina Salazar

51:28 Studies have shown that your relationship to body image and disordered eating have a big correlation to people not wanting to be intimate or have romantic partners. – Jessica Esfandiary

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of Open Late Podcast, Jess continues her conversation with Lana Shay, the author of "Erotic Hustle." Lana shares her lifestyle and mission. She details her current project of creating a “conscious” strip club, that’s more like a sensual temple where men can leave feeling empowered instead of hungover, broke, and less respect for women and themselves. Lana also reads an excerpt from her book, Erotic Hustle. 

In this episode of Open Late:

Connect with Lana Shay:

• Instagram: @iamlanashay

• Book: Erotic Hustle: Redefining Sin through Sacred Sexuality & Psychedelics

• Website:https://lanashay.com/

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

Quote from the episode:

3:57  It was easy for me to work in the strip club while having these practices, being so dedicated to a holistic lifestyle because I saw the need, and these were the people who needed it the most. It almost excited me. – Lana Shay

5:15  I am a huge advocate for ditching alcohol, and you know everyone's drinking in a strip club. That's what you were doing, we were serving them that. So, imagine that every single person who's drinking that I interface with, my deep secret intention is to get them to stop drinking. – Lana Shay

11:20 Men are really starved for intimacy and relationships with other men. Men will seek out sex workers a lot of times just for connection and I saw that so much in the club, and I also see it now in my life. – Jessica Esfandiary

13:30 Babies die if they're not touched and held enough when they're first born. Yes, we're not going to die as adults but it's still that feeling of kind of dying inside if you're not getting enough physical interaction. – Lana Shay

15:16 I like touching my customers, I feel like I can give so much through one conscious touch and it doesn't have to be sexual. It never was sexual, it's just like “Hey I see you I feel you.” – Lana Shay

16:23 People do not get better when they're punished. It doesn't work. – Jessica Esfandiary 

17:52 I like the idea where men come into a strip club where we can show up for them in a way that allows them to go out in the world and feel like a man that's nourished and powerful. A way that he's connected to himself and wants to show up for women in a conscious way. – Lana Shay

18:53 Women like us are so committed to breaking these cycles and these constructs that just don't serve anyone. Patriarchy is such a touchy thing and I think what men fail to realize is it's hurting them more than it's hurting women because it's this unseen hurt that happens. – Jessica Esfandiary

27:08 In the right environment with the right container and people it could be the most expansive work you do in your life. - Jessica Esdadiary

29:05 Understand the power of sexual energy and how to circulate it and cultivate it and use it for much more than a crotch sneeze. Not that orgasms are bad, but certain types of orgasms are like prostheses. We can get way better orgasms here, people! - Lana Shay

32:39 There is so much healing in sexuality. I truly believe it's in denying our sexual nature that we cause a lot of pain inside ourselves - Jessica Esfandiary 

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of Open Late Podcast, Jessica sits down and has a conversation with Lana Shay, author of "Erotic Hustle." Together, they explore the fascinating parallels in their lives, discovering that their paths may have crossed in the past during their time working in the vibrant nightlife of Las Vegas. Reflecting on their respective journeys, Jessica and Lana dive into their experiences with psychedelics and the profound transformations these substances have brought to their lives. Lana shares her personal story, including her past marriage and the unexpected twists and turns that led her to living in the jungle in Costa Rica!

In this episode of Open Late:

Connect with Lana Shay:

• Instagram: @iamlanashay

• Book: Erotic Hustle: Redefining Sin through Sacred Sexuality & Psychedelics

• Website:https://lanashay.com/

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

Quotes from the episode:

9:10  I was in a very toxic relationship and pretty devoted to this guy really not knowing what my own wants and desires were. Shortly after I found out that that guy was totally leading a double life for almost three years and had a pretty serious sex addiction. – Jessica Esfandiary

12:24 You need to stop resisting and fighting your desire to be in a relationship. - Lana Shay

14:03 There was a moment where I wanted I had this deep desire to have a child with him and I realized it was simply because I wanted to heal him. I wanted him to feel so deeply loved that someone wanted him to continue his legacy. – Lana Shay

15:47 Women in general, as we're growing up, are very conditioned to tune ourselves to the energy of men and be in that nurturing, supportive, “how can I please you” role. – Jessica Esfandiary 

24:40 I'm so healthy, all I care about is my health. And I'm preaching to people about holistic living while I have to down a bottle of Advil every month, I feel like such a fake. – Lana Shay

28:34 Our body builds up a lot of toxins. We live in a pretty toxic environment, all the things we put in our bodies and on our skin, and then it's absorbed, not to mention the way that we think and the way that we speak to ourselves. – Jessica Esfandiary

36:37 I was in Costa Rica, and people started leaving as covid started spreading. And they said the borders are closing, you either leave now or stay here. I was like “The world is finally ending and I am “stuck” in a paradise? I am not leaving!”. - Lana Shay

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode of Open Late Podcast, Jessica takes a moment to provide a heartfelt life update since the beginning of the year, sharing her personal journey towards motherhood. Jessica opens up about her experience of losing the ability to carry children and the emotional challenges that came with it. She then takes us through her journey of exploring surrogacy as a path to parenthood, including the process of finding the right surrogate. Jessica shares the heartwarming story of meeting their surrogate Carly and the excitement from discussing the idea of having twins to actually getting pregnant. She reflects on the emotions and preparations that accompanied this life-changing decision. As a special treat, Jessica announces exciting giveaways for the listeners, adding an extra element of celebration and connection with the Open Late community. Don't miss out!

In this episode of Open Late:

Episode about Motherhood with McLean McGown: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/open-late/id1587979583?i=1000560573356

Follow our surrogacy pregnancy: @the.surrogacy.pregnancy

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

Quotes from the episode:

0:51 The quality of our relationships dictate the quality of our lives. - Jessica Esfandiary

3:05  My journey through having cervical cancer and a hysterectomy ultimately resulted in me not being able to get pregnant because I don't have a uterus or for the rest of the parts. - Jessica Esfandiary

6:20  A really good friend of one of my closest friends reached out and said "I think that my friend is your surrogate.” - Jessica Esfandiary

7:03 I remember seeing her name on my phone and I just knew what it was about.. Like in that moment I was like “Oh my God” there's nothing else this could be about. - Jessica Esfandiary

8:28  Recognition and confirmation that this was the person that was meant to carry our babies into the world was such a pure feeling. - Jessica Esfandiary

13: 24 The Open Late studio we sit in right now will become our nursery. - Jessica Esfandiary

15:27 One of the other really amazing things about this journey to becoming parents is we feel like we just got invited to like “The cool kids club”. all of our other friends who are parents or becoming parents at this moment and we're all like doing this together and that feels really cool to share information and insights. - Jessica Esfandiary

16:44 No one knows what they are doing at the beginning, and it's okay to figure it out along the way. - Jessica Esfandiary

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this special celebratory 100th episode of Open Late, Jessica is joined by her long-time friends Ginger Banks, an adult performer and activist, and Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, an NYU Professor of Sex and Sexuality and renowned sex researcher. Together, they discuss the nature of play parties and the standards organizers should follow, emphasizing the importance of embracing mistakes as a natural part of exploration and growth. The trio shares their own diverse experiences and perspectives, shedding light on how these experiences have shaped their outlook on various subjects. They delve into evolving gender questions and examine the impact of gender on sexual experiences. Consent, safety, and trauma responses are also key topics of discussion, with an emphasis on the significance of obtaining explicit consent and creating a safe environment for all individuals involved. The hosts explore the complexities of trauma and its potential impact on responses within sexual contexts.

In this episode of Open Late:

Connect with Ginger:

• Instagram: @thegingerbanks 

Connect with Dr.Zhana:

• Instagram:@drzhana

• Website:www.drzhana.com

• Email: [email protected] 

• Open Smarter Course

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp

• Open Late Dictionary

Quotes from the episode:

17:30 Good and bad things happen at the club, good and bad things happen at sex clubs, good and bad things happen like all over the world and there's no such thing as a perfect space as ultimately a safe space because we're all humans flawed we're all gonna make mistakes. - Ginger Banks

20:00 I think it's really important if someone transgresses us to tell them how they hurt us and how they affected us, because I don't think there's any other way that their behavior is gonna change if we just completely remove ourselves from the situation. - Ginger Banks

39:40 Sometimes people cross boundaries because they themselves are so excited about the situation that they're in their own desire. Their own excitement is sort of overpowering their ability to read these more ambiguous signs that the person is showing in an accurate way. - Dr. Zhana Vrangalova

49:30 Personally, I think it's really important for me to be in my body. It makes it a lot safer that I don't drink because it really does put this time blindness on people it's called myopia where they actually only care about what's happening now, they don't care about the consequences. - Ginger

Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions.

• Open Smarter Course

The product I love who support this show:

• Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20

• The Oh Club OPENLATE

• Desire Resorts 

Older episodes with

• Ginger: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/open-late/id1587979583?i=1000546411260

• Dr. Zhana: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/open-late/id1587979583?i=1000603261737

This is a Sabbatical Jess Production

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode, Jess connects with Emily, Dedeker, and Jase from the Multiamory podcast, who are also the co-authors of their recently released book, "Multiamory: Essential Tools for Modern Relationships." They share the inspiration behind their book and explore the journey they took to bring it to life. The hosts engage in a lively discussion about the various relationship tools and chapters featured in their book. This is not another “How To” book! Additionally, the Multiamory hosts reveal their favorite tools and explain why they find them valuable. The conversation takes a deeper dive into the realm of creating healthy communication within relationships and offer insightful advice on overcoming disagreements in relationships in a simpler way.

In this episode of Open Late:

Connect with Multiamory:

• Website: https://www.multiamory.com/

• Book: https://www.multiamory.com/book

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/multiamory_podcast/

• Become a Patreon/ Join the Discord : https://www.patreon.com/bePatron?c=256168

• Link to buy the Multiamory: Essential Tools for Modern Relationships book: multiamory.com/book

Connect with Jessica:

• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast

• Website: openlatepodcast.com 

• YouTube: Open Late Podcast

• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz

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Quotes from the episode:

9:05  It's inevitable that whether you're in a triad, trying to get a threesome, solo poly, or maybe you want to find your monogamous married soulmate, or whatever it is, you're going to run into some communication problems. So we wrote a book and mapped out some tools you can use. Dedeker 

12:48 The point is to not just jump to what it is that you think your partner needs but rather ask. Maybe say “what are you looking for here” or for you to tell your partner “hey all that I need from you right now is this”. Emily

13:45 I don't always know what I want, especially with my partner. Jessica Esfandiary

16:50 What people struggle with the most is how to communicate about their relationship choices to the people that don't understand their relationship choices. Jessica Esfandiary

19:00 Finding a good online community is difficult. Jase

19:10 I found that it is often better to communicate in person because we tend to be less shitty to each other face-to-face than we are online. Jase

24:00 When I say “I want to have a talk” it’s often associated with “Oh that's gonna be bad. This is gonna be stressful. You have a complaint.” What I love about Radar Check-in is, that it helps to take away some of those notions because in it you also talk about the stuff that's going well, stuff that's challenging, future plans and, maybe things you want to try.. Jase

28:48 Even if you know a person extremely well, you can never fully know exactly what's going on with them. Their desires and needs for something new and exciting in the relationship, even if things are going great, is a great opportunity for a Radar Check-in. Emily

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