Oversharing

In an Oversharing first, Jordana and Naomi record the show in-studio together. They start off with a conversation about being half-siblings and their complicated family tree. Next, they respond to an email from a listener who can’t help but feel like she wasted two years of her life in a relationship. Will she ever get over it? They talk about the therapeutic value of writing an angry letter to an ex—but never sending it—and why it helps you to reflect on what went wrong. For the Betchcist email, a writer asks if she can control who her kid is friends with. Naomi knows this feeling all too well—she suggests a psychological technique called “motivational interviewing” where the kid highlights the negatives of the relationship and comes to a realization about it themselves. Finally, this week’s triggered submissions include being called the wrong name, a vow renewal soon after a wedding, and judgements about how you raise your kids.

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Jordana and Naomi start the week with an email from a listener who feels like she can’t approach her partner with open communication because he gets too defensive. How do you navigate conflict with someone who escalates quickly and can’t deal with criticism? Plus, they talk about fights that arise from being on your phone too much, and how we often fight differently than our partner. For the Betchicist email, a listener writes in about a family feud and her complicated feelings about reconnecting with family members she hasn’t seen in years—would that be disloyal to her immediate family? Finally, the Triggered scenarios include an over-tired daughter, a friend who wants to call “dibs” on a guy she likes, and a couple who needs a new solution to a repeat argument.

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This week’s Oversharing starts with a listener email about an all-too-common source of anxiety these days: mass shootings and the safety of our loved ones. A listener writes in with a question about how to cope with a child going off to school for the first time during a time where shootings are constantly in the news, igniting feelings of fear and anxiety. How much caution do we need to exercise, and how much should we limit our exposure to anxiety-inducing information? Then Jordana and Naomi read this week’s Betchicist submission from a listener who got iced out by her sister after serving as her de facto nanny for years. How do you set new boundaries when a family member becomes too demanding? And how do you weigh your own needs for validation and autonomy against the needs of young children? Finally, they close with some Triggered scenarios about family members following an ex, animals after a breakup, and a lazy member of the group chat.

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Naomi and Jordana respond to FAQs in their DMs with an in-depth conversation about getting into therapy. Jordana shares her personal experience with trying therapy for the first time in her 20’s, and makes some suggestions for how to get into it yourself. Pro-tip: your therapist should address it if you’re late. Naomi discusses the importance of chemistry between therapist and client, and provides insight about the importance of self-care as a therapist. Then Naomi and Jordana discuss their therapy guidelines—Is it okay for your friends or family to see the same therapist as you? What is and isn’t a conflict of interest? Next, they respond to a listener who worries she’s settling down too early with her long-term boyfriend. Anyone else love date night? Drawing from their personal lives, Naomi and Jordana share how they keep things exciting with their own partners. Then, the Betchicist email sparks a conversation about verbalizing boundaries in relationships and the definition of monogamy. Finally, the Triggered submissions include a discussion of how to react when someone makes a rude comment, sharing news of an engagement with an ex, and projecting insecurities onto a date.

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Jordana and Naomi are doing things a little differently today: instead of their usual convo, Naomi leads Jordana and listeners through a guided meditation (feel free to follow along). They discuss different kinds of meditation, and the best approach for listeners on the go. Naomi defines some key terms frequently thrown around (like ‘mindfulness’ and ‘mantra’) before sharing some tips and tricks for being mindful in your everyday life. Jordana uses her personal experience to provide insight into using meditation practices (yes, counting sheep is a thing) and relaxing her mind before bed. Then a listener writes in about getting fired from her job, and they give advice on how to move forward. Finally, this week’s Triggered covers the frustration of wanting to be invited to the events you don’t even want to go to. Stay tuned for next week where they’ll discuss tips for finding the right therapist.

Check out the Hung Up podcast here: Hung Up

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Jordana and Naomi start the week with some tips for allowing yourself to feel your feelings and stop avoiding them with distractions. Naomi offers a great explanation of why it’s okay to lean into the physical feelings of emotion (painful as they may be). Then a listener writes in to ask how to cope with a recent failed relationship and find a sense of hope for the future. They examine a list of “qualities we want to find in a relationship” that she received from her therapist. Should we all examine our list of qualities that we’re looking for in a partner, or is it better to let things come naturally? Then another listener emails with a challenging Betchicist question: at what point is it okay to ask your future spouse to start therapy before getting married? In this case, is it fair to ask her boyfriend to confront his complicated feelings toward his mother? Finally, they close with a game of Triggered featuring a trio of tense situations resulting in anxiety, embarrassment, and a little jealousy.

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Before getting into the heavy stuff, Jordana and Naomi begin the episode a convo about meditation. Naomi tells us about the importance of regular practice, while Jordana reflects on the difficulty of keeping it up. Then they dive into a discussion on cheating in relationships, and Naomi shares her thoughts on the age-old adage: “once a cheater, always a cheater.” They talk about reactions to cheating on both sides, and the importance of therapy in dealing with those emotions. This week’s Overshare comes from a listener who recently found out her serious boyfriend has cheated on all of his exes. About to enter a period of long-distance due to work, she questions whether her anxiety about his infidelity is valid, and how she can overcome it. The Betchicist email comes from a listener who is concerned her best friend’s boyfriend may be cheating. Should she bring it up, or let the situation unfold on its own? Finally, this week’s Triggered submissions address an airplane close encounter, nasty comments about an ex post-breakup, and being told you’re “punching above your looks.”

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Jordana starts the show with a story about having a positive customer service interaction (thanks to some great advice from the listeners). Then they dive into a conversation about setting the scene for a difficult conversation, and Naomi tells us what “doorknob comments” are in therapy. A listener calls in with an advice question about a toxic family dynamic involving her brother-in-law, and asks how to approach the relationship with her sister going forward. How do you share your true feelings without alienating a loved one? The Betchicist email of the week comes from a listener who has a family reunion planned but now feels pressured to miss it for a work obligation. Finally, the Triggered submissions include a know-it-all friend, a thoughtless boyfriend, and some relationship envy.

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Jordana starts off this week by sharing about her recent work in becoming more grounded, and Naomi reveals how slowing down can actually help in preventing the urge to overshare. Then they respond to a listener voicemail all about how the urge to mention her relationship history too early has backfired. Why do we often feel the need to divulge too much, too early? Next they read a Betchicist email from a listener who is feeling pressure from her sister to express outraged on social media about social justice movements. Lastly, they end on a game of Triggered covering how to respond when someone else comments on your body image, being the “learning experience” child, and how to feel when you’re not invited to your own parent’s party.

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Naomi starts the week with a confession about falling into a social media spiral after starting the podcast, and Jordana shares her own experience with seeking approval in the podcast review page. Then a listener writes in about a friendship that turned tense after becoming roommates. How do you go about repairing a damaged relationship, especially when you live together? Plus, they talk about the challenge of airing your dirty laundry to mutual friends when it could come back to bite you. Next, they debate the Betchicist email of the week from a listener who found out a friend cheated on an exam. Is it your duty to turn a friend in, or are you obligated to keep their transgression a secret? Finally, they close things with a game of Triggered featuring a jealous spouse, an ever-present sibling, and a slighted co-worker.

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