If you're having trouble keeping a promising relationship past the six-month mark, then this episode is for you. The truth is that most relationships don't last, and the primary reason why they don't is something that I call the "crisis of disillusionment." Almost all relationships are built upon an initial foundation of projected fantasy. Over time, disconfirming evidence to the contrary accumulates and the fantasy eventually is unable to withstand the assault of reality: this is the crisis of disillusionment. It's inevitable, and it's really when the relationship begins -- if it ever does.

#dating #relationship #datingadvice

Make no mistake: sex is important to women. However, as important as it is, it's not as important to women as it is to men. In this episode, I'll attempt to explain why sex is so important to men, and why it's the key to keeping men in your life. To do this, I'll make use of an analogy from the other big pillar of adult life: work. In the hierarchy of needs, it makes sense to prioritize those that are unique to a given relationship.

#sex #dating #relationship

This episode builds on the conclusions of my previous episode, "Women want it all." Today I'll be tackling the age-old complaint of all also-rans: nice guys finish last. The flip side of this is the analogous complaint that women love jerks. However, it only looks like women choose jerks from the perspective of nice guys. The fact of the matter is that this isn't entirely true, and I'll explain why using the results of psychological research. And since men typically understand business better than they understand women, I'll use a professional framework to illustrate my points.

#dating #niceguys #relationship

Today I'm going to be talking about one of my all-time favorite pieces of psychological research, an article entitled "Attractive women want it all" (see link below). When presented with an extensive list of potential partner attributes, women ranked as most attractive by a panel of men expressed an interest in every attribute on the list. They literally wanted every single thing. However, they apparently didn't want every single thing equally. I'll discuss the upshot of this research with respect to male dating strategy.

"Attractive women want it all": https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/147470490800600116

#dating #relationship #attraction

I was recently inspired to begin a series on what seems to me to be socially neglected attributes of love. My model for love is spiritual, and -- assuming a omnibenevolent Higher Power -- I try to understand what love is by observing the Divine's relationship with the created universe. Assuming this framework takes us far away from the comfortable, fuzzy feelings that dominate the social conception of love. In this episode, I'll discuss one aspect of that observed relationship, namely: order. Order, as the fundamental attribute that makes life and prosperity possible, must be an essential component of love.

#love #spritual #order

This is an episode for women trying to use online dating apps to enter into relationships with men. Pre-screening is when the woman takes control of the courtship and attempts to further qualify the man after he asks her out on a date. While this is almost certainly done by women out of a desire not to waste their time, my argument is that pre-screening is not a good idea, as it generally does not achieve the women's desired outcome. There are three reasons why this is the case, as I discuss in this episode.

#dating #relationship #datingadvice

I often hear women on the dating market speak of their difficulties in finding a man interested in a committed, long-term relationship. In this episode, I will explain why that might be the case. To the extent that the purpose of dating is to enter into such a relationship, modern dating doesn't work. And that is because the privileges given to and the responsibilities expected of men are not allocated properly over the course of a relationship to incentivize his commitment. Until this is addressed, women will be fighting an uphill battle.

"Men want to be alone": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9blas1Xtoc

#commitment #relationship #dating

This one is for the ladies. In this episode, I'll explain how you may be inadvertently messing up with the men you actually want to keep in your life. Most women punish the men they like, and this behavior can drive away the ones you want to stay. Absenting an explicit commitment to the contrary, if a certain behavior wouldn't bother you coming from a man you could take or leave, you shouldn't let it bother you coming from a man you really like. This doesn't mean putting up with bad behavior. It means that the definition of bad behavior doesn't change depending on your feelings.

#dating #relationship #attraction

Much has been said of late on men's attraction to younger women, and much of this has been said before. Men are visual creatures; men are expressing a preference; men are using beauty as a signal for fertility, etc. You already know these reasons, so this episode does not discuss them. This episode discusses another reason men are attracted to younger women: a reason so obvious that it almost never gets talked about (though it's staring us all in the face).

#dating #attraction #men

This episode is a continuation of a previous episode, entitled "Women have more options in the sexual marketplace." In that episode, I mentioned how the modern optionality of women down at the docks solves some problems and creates others. This episode will be devoted to examining the biggest problem created by this optionality: the two body problem. What happens when two captains enter into a relationship? The outcome is fairly predictable.

#dating #relationship #sex