SOBER AS F*CK

What happens when you stop treating recovery like a temporary fix and finally decide to change everything?

This week on Sober as F*ck, Jess and Ryan sit down with Stephen O’Neil, co-host of the award-winning podcast Chaos and Recovery, for an unfiltered conversation about addiction, relapse, family, fatherhood, the 12 Steps, and rebuilding a life that once felt completely beyond repair.

Stephen’s substance use began young and eventually progressed into years of cocaine, pills, methamphetamine addiction, repeated relapses, homelessness, arrests, detoxes, treatment programs, sober living, and roughly 15 to 20 trips to rehab. At his lowest, relationships were fractured, contact with his children was limited, and even the people closest to him were preparing themselves for the possibility that he might not survive.

After years of trying to use recovery as a temporary escape from consequences, Stephen finally began doing the deeper work. Drug court, intensive outpatient treatment, daily meetings, accountability, service, and an honest commitment to the 12 Steps helped him begin rebuilding his life from the ground up.

Today, Stephen is rebuilding relationships with his children and family, recently married the woman he once thought he had lost, is preparing to welcome another child, and is using his experience to help others through Chaos and Recovery. He shares why recovery had to become something he did for himself first, how giving back keeps him connected to sobriety, and why patience is one of the hardest but most important parts of long-term recovery.

Stephen also shares one of the most powerful full-circle moments of the episode: years ago, while struggling with his own recovery, he spent more than a year driving a young couple and their baby to meetings every week. Years later, he unexpectedly saw them again. They were still sober, and the baby he once drove to those meetings was now eight years old and growing up with sober parents.

This episode is about more than quitting drugs or alcohol. It’s about ego, instant gratification, accountability, family, community, service, self-respect, and what becomes possible when someone keeps getting back up.

In this episode:
• Addiction beginning in adolescence
• Cocaine, methamphetamine, pills, alcohol, relapse, and polysubstance addiction
• Repeated rehab, detox, incarceration, and homelessness
• Drug court and structured addiction treatment
• Why temporary sobriety and long-term recovery are not the same thing
• The role of the 12 Steps in Stephen’s recovery
• Rebuilding trust with children, partners, and family
• Why recovery sometimes has to be “selfish”
• Patience and instant gratification in early recovery
• Service, community, and helping the next person
• Becoming the sober father Stephen once thought he could never be

🎙️ CONNECT WITH STEPHEN O’NEIL + CHAOS AND RECOVERY

Listen/watch Chaos and Recovery on Spotify and YouTube.

Follow Chaos and Recovery on Instagram and Facebook.

The podcast features conversations with people in recovery as well as family members, professionals, and guests affected by alcohol addiction, drug addiction, gambling addiction, overeating, and other forms of addiction and recovery.

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What if sobriety isn’t about giving something up, but finally realizing how much you have to gain?

Suzanne Warye is back on Sober as F*ck for a conversation that goes way beyond quitting drinking.

Suzanne is the creator and host of The Sober Mom Life and author of The Sober Shift: A Modern-Day Guide to Living an Abundant Sober Life, now available in paperback. She joins Ryan and Jess to talk about changing the way we look at alcohol, motherhood, sobriety, identity, and what happens when you stop waiting for a “rock bottom” before questioning whether alcohol still belongs in your life.

Suzanne shares the philosophy behind The Sober Shift: moving from seeing sobriety as deprivation or punishment to recognizing it as an opportunity for freedom, abundance, self-trust, and a completely different relationship with yourself.

They get into:

• Why you don’t have to identify as an “alcoholic” or lose everything before examining your relationship with alcohol
• The fear and self-doubt that can come with choosing sobriety for yourself
• Why moderation can become an exhausting cycle of rules and negotiation
• Alcohol marketing and the industries that benefit from keeping drinking normalized
• Mommy wine culture and how deeply alcohol has been woven into parenting and everyday life
• Learning who you are again without alcohol
• Motherhood, teenagers, technology, music, and raising kids without pretending your own past never happened
• Why authenticity and showing the imperfect parts of life connect more than trying to appear polished
• The decline in alcohol use among younger generations and Suzanne’s concerns about vaping, synthetic substances, and other emerging trends
• Why honest conversations and informed decisions about alcohol matter

And because this is Sober as F*ck, the conversation also somehow finds its way through parenting, true crime, terrible horror movies, clowns, questionable music choices, bodily functions, and the kind of completely unfiltered conversation you only have with people you actually like.

At the center of it all is a bigger question:

What could happen if, instead of asking whether your drinking is “bad enough” to quit, you gave sobriety a real chance?

📚 THE SOBER SHIFT
Suzanne’s book, The Sober Shift: A Modern-Day Guide to Living an Abundant Sober Life, is available now, including the NEW paperback edition released September 29.

Follow Suzanne and explore everything she’s created:

📸 Instagram: @suzannewarye
📸 The Sober Mom Life: @thesobermomlife
🎙️ The Sober Mom Life Podcast
🌐 suzannewarye.com
☕ Sober Mom Life Cafe
👥 The Sober Mom Life Facebook community
🆓 Sobriety resources, guides, events and more available through her website

📚 Find The Sober Shift at suzannewarye.com/book and through major booksellers.

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🎵 TikTok: @soberaftok
🎥 YouTube: Sober as F*ck Podcast

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Are we all addicted to something, or have we started calling every habit an addiction?

Addiction isn’t limited to alcohol and drugs. Gambling, social media, food, shopping, exercise, work, sex, technology, and other behaviors can become compulsive. But where is the line between something you love, a habit you rely on, and an actual addiction?

In this episode of Sober as F*ck, Ryan and Jess get candid about addiction, compulsive behavior, coping mechanisms, and the vices people don’t always recognize in themselves.

Jess examines some of her own obsessive tendencies, from working out to absolutely crushing audiobooks, while Ryan and Jess unpack a bigger question: When does a healthy or harmless behavior cross the line into something that is controlling you?

They get into:

• Why addiction goes far beyond alcohol and drugs
• The difference between habits, compulsions, and addiction
• How society normalizes certain potentially harmful behaviors while stigmatizing others
• Why people can replace one unhealthy coping mechanism with another
• Social media, exercise, work, food, gambling, and other modern-day vices
• The role denial can play when a behavior starts interfering with your life
• Why self-awareness matters in sobriety and recovery
• And whether Jess's audiobook obsession actually needs an intervention

This isn't about labeling every guilty pleasure as an addiction. It's about getting curious about why we do what we do, what we're trying to escape or change, and whether we're still the one making the choice.

Because sometimes the most important question isn't, “Am I addicted?”

It's: “Can I stop, and what happens when I try?”

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#SoberAsFck #AddictionRecovery #Sobriety #MentalHealth #RecoveryPodcast

Ever feel like you’re chasing the day instead of actually living it?

Nic Collins knows that feeling. After years of heavy drinking, hiding his emotions, and trying to be who everyone else expected, he found himself in a jail cell wondering how his life had gotten there. What started as a two-week break from alcohol became more than seven years of sobriety.

In this episode of Sober as F *ck, Jess and Ryan sit down with Nic, a therapist, keynote speaker, author, and ultramarathon runner, for an honest conversation about alcohol recovery, men’s mental health, and building a life that feels like your own.Nic shares how a decade of consistent therapy helped him understand himself, why he left a nearly 20-year corporate career to become a therapist, and how sobriety gave him the energy to stop postponing the things he wanted to do.

We get into:

• Emotional masking, people-pleasing, and the exhaustion of chasing approval.

• The therapy work that helped lay the foundation for his sobriety.

• Taking alcohol-free life one milestone at a time.

• Finding connection and joy through trail running and adventure.

• Changing careers, embracing authenticity, and learning to enjoy where you are.

Nic is a mental health professional, author, speaker, coach, sobriety advocate, ultramarathon runner, and co-host of The Constant Quest Podcast.

📸 Nic: @nic_collins_authentic

🌐 NicCollinsAuthentic.com

🎙️ The Constant Quest Podcast

📖 Author of ADVANCE

🎧 Watch the full conversation with Nic Collins on Sober as F*ck at SAFPODCAST.COM

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What if your life looks completely fine on the outside, but you know something isn’t right underneath?

This week on Sober as F*ck, we sit down with Jonathan Ball, alcohol-freedom coach and creator of CreativeAF Coaching, for a conversation about the kind of drinking problem that can remain almost invisible to everyone except the person living it.

Jonathan had the career, the education, the marriage, the ambition, and the outward appearance of having his life together. But behind the scenes, alcohol had become tangled up with anxiety, burnout, overworking, isolation, and the constant pressure to keep performing. He could still work. He could still exercise. He could still show up. And for years, those things helped convince him that his drinking couldn’t really be that bad.

Jonathan opens up about spending more than a decade trying to moderate his drinking, eventually becoming alcohol-free for roughly two and a half years, and then turning back to alcohol while grieving the sudden deaths of his father-in-law and his father. What started with one margarita gradually led him straight back to the patterns he thought he had already escaped.

But his second time getting alcohol out of his life was different.

Instead of only removing the drink, Jonathan began examining why he drank in the first place. Through This Naked Mind and his subsequent coaching certification, he started digging into human behavior, psychology, beliefs, shame, self-worth, and the deeper patterns driving his choices. That work ultimately became the foundation for the coaching he does today.

We also get into the stigma surrounding the word alcoholic, why Jonathan once believed there were only two categories, “normal drinkers” and people who needed traditional recovery, and why discovering that there are multiple paths to changing your relationship with alcohol was so important to him.

Today, Jonathan works primarily with driven, ambitious professionals, particularly men, who may be succeeding by every external measure while privately knowing alcohol is taking more from their lives than they want to admit. His message is simple: you do not need a catastrophic rock bottom to want something better for yourself.

We talk sobriety, relapse, grief, masculinity, vulnerability, high-functioning drinking, self-worth, behavior change, fitness, relationships, and what becomes possible when you stop fighting yourself and actually start doing the deeper work.

And yes, Jonathan also tells us about waking up in a bush in Japan, covered in his own pee, because this is still Sober as F*ck.

ABOUT JONATHAN BALL

📸 Instagram: @creativeaf.coach
🌐 Website: livecreativeaf.com
🎙️ Podcast: The Alcohol Myth Podcast
🧠 This Naked Mind Certified Coach
💬 CreativeAF Coaching
🎓 Affective Liminal Psychology trained
💻 Alcohol-freedom, behavior change & personal coaching
🔄 Free courses and coaching resources available at livecreativeaf.com

SOBER AS F*CK

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What happens when the thing you love is deeply connected to the thing you’re trying to leave behind?

In this episode of Sober as F*ck, Ryan and Jess sit down with Joe Annotti, founder of Skull and Bogeys, a golf apparel brand built around sobriety, purpose, community, and giving back.

Joe opens up about his path to sobriety, why recovery finally had to become something he chose for himself, and what it was like returning to the golf course without alcohol. For years, drinking and golf had gone hand in hand. Getting sober meant learning how to enjoy the game, and his life, without relying on alcohol to be part of the experience.

Joe also shares the story behind Skull and Bogeys, including how his love of pirates, golf, and an unexpected idea about “armor” from his kids helped shape the brand. What started as an idea became a mission-driven company committed to supporting the recovery community, with 25% of net profits donated to charitable partners including Namaste Sober and Bastion.

Ryan, Jess, and Joe get into:

• Why Joe says he had to get sober for himself
• Navigating golf culture without alcohol
• The connection between drinking, identity, and belonging
• How therapy and self-work helped Joe rebuild his identity
• The story and meaning behind Skull and Bogeys
• Creating a sober golf community where people actually feel like they belong
• Building a business around purpose instead of just profit
• Why support and authenticity matter in long-term recovery
• And one unforgettable Mardi Gras story involving Joe on top of a car

This conversation is funny, vulnerable, and real. It’s about more than quitting drinking. It’s about figuring out who you are when alcohol is no longer part of the equation and building a life you genuinely want to be present for.

Whether you’re sober, sober curious, navigating addiction recovery, or simply trying to build a more authentic life, Joe’s story is proof that removing alcohol doesn’t have to make your world smaller.

Sometimes it gives you room to build something bigger.

GUEST: Joe Annotti
BRAND: Skull and Bogeys
WEBSITE: skullandbogeys.com

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What happens when alcohol gets a wellness makeover?

In this episode of Sober as F*ck, Jess and Ryan break down the growing trend of alcohol and THC brands using the language of health and wellness to sell products: low-carb, organic, clean, natural, sugar-free, vitamin-infused, and “get the buzz without the booze.”

They dig into the “health halo” effect, where clever marketing can make a product feel healthier simply because of the words on the label. But does adding vitamins, cutting carbs, or calling something “clean” actually change what you’re putting into your body?

Ryan shares how alcohol affected his weight, blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, testosterone, and overall health, and how dramatically those markers changed after he stopped drinking. He also looks back at the mental gymnastics of choosing low-carb beer and restricting food while continuing to drink heavily.

Jess and Ryan also tackle the rapidly expanding world of THC-infused and alcohol-alternative drinks, especially products marketed with promises like “get the buzz without the booze.” For people with a history of addiction, substance misuse, or using substances to escape and numb out, replacing alcohol with another mind-altering substance may not be as simple as the marketing makes it sound.

This episode isn’t about telling anyone what they can or can’t drink. It’s about recognizing the difference between wellness and wellness marketing, questioning the claims being sold to us, and understanding that a healthier-looking label doesn’t automatically make a product healthy.

Plus, Ryan has developed a slightly concerning relationship with his new sleep mask, Jess has questions, and somehow Bob Ross, keto, “Mommy Needs Wine” culture, dancing cats, mushrooms, and the Kardashians all make their way into the conversation.

If alcohol culture is changing, the marketing is going to change with it. The question is whether we’re paying attention.

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What happens when addiction takes almost everything from you, but recovery gives you a chance to build something entirely different?

In this episode of Sober as F*ck, we sit down with Myke Murray, better known in our house as “Boston Myke,” for one of the most raw, unfiltered recovery conversations we’ve had.

Myke’s story spans generations of addiction, alcohol, cocaine and methamphetamine use, homelessness, psychiatric hospitalization, suicide attempts, an abusive relationship, criminal charges, and the consequences of choices he made while deep in addiction. He doesn’t minimize any of it, and he doesn’t pretend recovery erased the past.

Instead, Myke talks openly about learning to live with accountability, guilt, mental health struggles, and the reality that sobriety is still a decision he has to make every single day.

But this episode isn’t only about how far addiction took him. It’s about what he decided to do next.

Today, Myke is rebuilding his life in Boston and using his experience to help other people find the connection he desperately needed when he was struggling. He helped create Robbie’s Group, an inclusive recovery group designed to welcome people regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, race, or background, while working to expand support for people who are too often left out of traditional recovery spaces.

We talk about:

• The progression from alcohol and prescription drugs to cocaine and methamphetamine
• The connection between addiction, sex, relationships, trauma, and validation
• Homelessness, suicidal ideation, psychiatric hospitalization, and finally accepting help
• Why lived experience matters in addiction and recovery
• LGBTQ+ recovery and the need for genuinely inclusive spaces
• Mental health, shame, guilt, and learning to ask for help
• Facing the legal consequences of addiction while rebuilding your life
• Why structure, work, meetings, sponsorship, and community became critical to Myke’s recovery
• Turning painful experiences into a reason to help the next person
• Why recovery isn’t about becoming perfect, it’s about what you choose to do with the next 24 hours

Myke carries 24-hour recovery chips with him because he never knows when he’ll meet someone who needs one. That idea becomes one of the most powerful themes of this conversation: no matter how much time you have, recovery ultimately comes back to the same thing. Today.

Myke puts it simply: “We all have 24 hours.”

This is a conversation about addiction, mental health, accountability, identity, second chances, and what can happen when someone who once needed a safe place decides to start creating one for other people.

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What if the question that changes your life isn’t “How do I stop?” but simply, “What if I did?”

Billy Hyland, author of The What If Shift, joins Ryan and Jess to share how one question helped him walk away from nearly 30 years of drinking and begin rebuilding his life from the inside out.

After years of binge drinking, blackouts, “one more” nights, health warnings, and convincing himself he still had everything under control, Billy reached a point where he could no longer ignore what alcohol was costing him. Instead of trying to figure out the rest of his life, he asked himself a much smaller question: What if I stopped drinking right now?

That question became the beginning of more than six years of sobriety and eventually the foundation for The What If Shift, a framework designed to help people move through change, uncertainty, hard truths, and the moments when they feel stuck.

Billy opens up about the deeper reasons behind his drinking, including his experience growing up adopted, struggling with belonging, and using alcohol as a shortcut to connection. He also shares why quitting drinking was only the beginning. Real recovery meant confronting the damage left behind, working through therapy, rebuilding relationships, and accepting that personal growth doesn’t have a finish line.

Ryan and Jess also get candid about their own marriage, the impact Ryan’s drinking and gambling had on their family, Jess’s decision to work on herself before Ryan got sober, and why sobriety doesn’t magically erase years of hurt, resentment, or trauma.

In this episode:
• Why “What if?” can become a powerful catalyst for change
• Billy’s journey from nearly 30 years of drinking to more than six years sober
• The connection between belonging, identity, and alcohol
• Why focusing on today can make sobriety feel possible
• How small rituals helped Billy build a new identity
• Why quitting drinking doesn’t automatically repair relationships
• The difference between changing yourself and trying to change someone else
• How therapy helped uncover what alcohol had been masking
• Why loved ones need their own healing process
• What it means to make amends without expecting forgiveness
• Why recovery is about progress, not perfection
• How Billy transformed his sobriety experience into The What If Shift

Whether you’re questioning your relationship with alcohol, supporting someone in recovery, rebuilding a relationship after addiction, or standing at a crossroads in your own life, this conversation is a reminder that you don’t need to know what the next five years will look like.

Sometimes you only need to ask: What if I made a different choice today?

Learn more about Billy Hyland, The What If Shift, and his resources at thewhatifshift.com.

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Is drinking officially becoming uncool?

In this episode of Sober as F*ck, Ryan and Jess dig into the cultural shift happening around alcohol, sobriety, mental health, and wellness. From the explosion of non-alcoholic drinks and mocktails to younger generations questioning whether drinking is even worth the hangover, the social pressure around alcohol may finally be starting to change.

But there’s another side to the wellness movement that deserves a conversation.

Ryan and Jess talk about the difference between becoming more informed about mental health and self-diagnosing based on something you saw online. Jess shares her own experience with anxiety, ADHD, OCD, therapy, and learning that understanding your brain requires more than relating to a TikTok or checking boxes on a symptom list.

They also get into better sleep after quitting alcohol, why Ryan is obsessed with his blackout sleep mask, the growing popularity of NA beer, supplements and wellness claims, placebo effects, therapy, moderation in everyday life, and why removing alcohol doesn’t automatically fix everything underneath it.

The bigger question: Are we actually getting healthier, or are we just replacing one trend with another?

Sobriety doesn’t have to mean hiding from life. It can mean understanding yourself better, taking your mental health seriously, and realizing you don’t need alcohol to belong, celebrate, relax, or have a good time.

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Ryan’s gambling recovery podcast, The Last Bet, and information about Betting on Recovery meetings are also available at SAFPODCAST.COM.

Want to join Ryan and Jess as a guest on Sober as F*ck? Visit the website to apply.

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