Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating

When you get chumped, why don't people bring casseroles? In this episode Tracy and Sarah discuss the complicated "ambiguous" grief of infidelity. Therapists call ambiguous grief "complex, often unresolved emotional pain felt when a loved one is physically absent but psychologically present, or physically present but psychologically absent. Being cheated on is its own kind of loss without closure and is uniquely isolating.

In this episode, Tracy responds to your miscellaneous voicemails. A caller wishes to "put the final nail in the coffin" on the argument that infidelity is abuse, because of STI risk and consent. Another listener shares news about a sex addict conference in Denver. And a woman has a hard time leaving her marriage after her fifth D-Day and over thirty years of marriage.

There was so much stupid, enough to make a second podcast of submissions. All the dimwitted things people in affairs say to chumps. We can't make sense of it, but we can make fun of it.

We asked, you answered with the dumbest, most self-serving, ridiculous things affair partners say to chumps. How can you come between them? Hey, they're praying for you. We'll all laugh about this and be friends someday.

In this episode Sarah and Tracy discuss what happens when parents cancel their subscriptions to adulting and check out for affairs. We hear from listeners how the kids are doing and how to navigate solo parenting. What it's like to be the show up parent contrasted with the Disney Dad or Mom. Is there any reward?

If you're a cheater who disavows cheating, are you suffering from cognitive dissonance? Or are you skilled in the dark arts of manipulation? Perhaps it's both. The best defense is a good offense. We hear from listeners about how they assumed their partners were safe because they were so offended by infidelity. How chumps were accused of cheating. How pointless the monogamy conversation was. And the sad sausage defense of... they didn't enjoy it. Nope. Not at all.

Inspired by the Olympic skier who took the opportunity of his medal win to plead for his girlfriend to take him back after cheating on her, we share your cringy hoovering stories. Hey, it didn't work out with Schmoopie! You free?

It's a common manipulation tactic for unfaithful partners to lead with self pity. Hey, their infidelity was hard on them too. Actually, harder really. In this episode, Tracy and Sarah respond to your sad sausage submissions. What happens when self-pity meets a blithering lack of self-awareness? Will you rescue them from the affliction of their own choices?

In this episode, Tracy talks with Kirk Martin, the creator of the Calm Parenting podcast which covers the power struggles between kids and parents and outlines strategies to help. Kirk is a compassionate observer of the unjust financial and emotional burdens single parents face. During his childhood in the 1970s, Kirk's mother left his abusive father and raised four boys on her own. We talk about her legacy in his life and then Kirk weighs in with his calm parent approach to listener questions.

When Sarah's then-husband walked out for his affair partner, her mother was her rock for the next 14 years. She helped Sarah raise the children, and was her biggest supporter. In this episode, Tracy and Sarah talk about their infidelity angels, the people who got them through. Sylvia passed away in December. Sarah was her caregiver until the end. Love is all about showing up.