In this episode, Scott Brassart discusses the addictive nature of pornography, and why it's such a hard "drug" to quit. Scott and Tami then answer participant questions about porn addiction and recovery support for both the addict and the partner. 

 

TAKEAWAYS:

[:30] Porn, written porn, and ‘not porn’ – all from a porn addict’s perspective. 

[2:47] What makes so appealing porn to addicts? 

[4:20] The two elements of pornography that make it highly addictive. 

[12:45] What is happening inside your brain while watching porn? 

[13:51] Porn, cocaine, and orgasm payoffs, ranked by pleasure levels. 

[16:20] Why do some addicts have a physical library collection of porn? 

[19:38] By escaping, porn addicts miss out on the good as well as the bad. 

[24:48] Should I start using video editing apps to take away erotic content? 

[27:20] What is the difference between porn addiction and compulsive porn usage?

[28:23] Is there anything healthy about sexualizing myself in a performative way? 

[31:07] Is any element of porn usage healthy?

[34:12] As a sex and porn addict, is there any scenario where I could view porn in a healthy manner? 

[38:30] Is sex itself ever going to be satisfying enough for my porn addict partner? 

[42:13] How do I protect myself from rewiring my brain into an addict's brain? 

[45:30] Is my addict partner trying to escape our marriage? 

[48:58] If we have sex every night will my partner stop cheating? 

[50:47] How can I be the best cheerleader to my partner through recovery? 

[52:01] Is watching porn considered cheating? 

[55:10] Resources that focus on grief and loss of porn addiction. 

 

RESOURCES:

Seekingintegrity.com

Email Tami: [email protected]

Sexandrelationshiphealing.com

Intherooms.com

Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss

Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss

Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions. 

 

QUOTES

• “If I’m looking at an image to get a physical arousal, it’s porn, whether somebody else would classify it as porn or not.” 

• “Porn addict brains and cocaine addict brains are indistinguishable.  The parts that are over and under developed look exactly the same.” 

• “Addictions are not about pleasure.  They’re about escape.” 

• “There is nothing in a TV show that is worth me losing my recovery.” 

• “There is no ‘just one’ for addicts.” 

• “There is not a partner on the planet that can make their addict not act out if they’re ultimately going to.”