Your Secret Is Safe With Me

What happens when your affair partner becomes needy of your attention and affection? How can you handle the feelings of discomfort and uncertainty when ending your marriage while being pushed by your affair partner to make a decision?

Dr. Marie Murphy says it's all about how you manage your mind and deal with your emotions. You feel good when you're with your affair partner, so you begin to expect that feeling. But, when things go differently, you may encounter feelings of neediness. What does Dr. Murphy suggest?

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy talks about understanding and navigating neediness in your affair. Dr. Murphy discusses decision-making and the effect it can have on your relationships, how to manage conflicting experiences, and understanding the behaviors behind neediness to create a more respectful relationship.

It's easy to feel exhausted when you're constantly at someone else's disposal. Society's biases toward a Martyr Complex can make it difficult to talk about — especially when you're told to sacrifice your own happiness at someone else's expense. How can you set boundaries to achieve your own happiness, even when it feels difficult?

Loretta knows what it is like to face challenges, stigmas, and responsibilities as a caregiver to her husband with Alzheimer's. Since her husband's diagnosis, she had sacrificed her happiness in and outside of the bedroom — until she made a decision. Are you ready to improve your situation and let go of the guilt holding you back?

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy is joined by Loretta to discuss how to create your own happiness and rediscover new joy — regardless of the difficulties in your life. Loretta talks about her husband's diagnosis with Alzheimer's, why setting boundaries is an incalculable practice in a relationship, and ways to allow growth and happiness into your life through new opportunities while caring for an incapacitated spouse.

If you've ever found yourself staring your desires in the face, it can be challenging to ride the emotional waves that follow. Trying to suppress your desire can be exhausting — but what if there was another way? How can you prioritize the experience of feeling your desires without taking any action?

Dr. Marie Murphy recommends practice. Try allowing yourself to feel your desires, even if they lead to disappointment or impatience. Most importantly, Dr. Murphy notes that letting yourself acknowledge your desires does not mean you must take action. So, how do you allow yourself to experience the emotion of desire?

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy talks about figuring out the feelings and emotions of your desires. Listen as Dr. Murphy explains the repercussions of neglecting your desire, why honoring your desires can lead to better experiences, and how to practice feeling your desires.

Do you struggle with competing desires in your relationship? Do you find yourself unable to reconcile those longings? Desire is a complex emotion that can take many forms, so how do you learn to navigate all of its intricacies?

For most of her adult life, Katy Dion internalized stereotypes about motherhood and the ideal relationship, leading to conflicting desires. It wasn't until she tried to separate those desires that she realized she could change her mindset to accommodate both. Now, Katy uses her learnings as a mindfulness-based life coach and facilitator to help partners clarify what they want.

In today's episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy talks with Katy Dion, a mindfulness-based life coach, chaplain, facilitator, and writer, about rectifying her own desires. Katy shares her inspiration for writing the Modern Love essay, her journey to motherhood while navigating a complex relationship, and her strategies for sharing your desires with your partner.

Engaging in a new infidelity situation can carry intense and conflicting emotions. How can you handle the magnitude and mixture of your feelings? Is it possible to find clarity during these heightened moments?

According to Dr. Marie Murphy, the intensity of the emotions accompanying a new relationship is compounded with an infidelity situation — especially if the relationship is forbidden or you have conflicting feelings. Dr. Murphy recommends that you take time to digest these feelings to get clear on what you want from your new affair. Only then can you deal with your emotions clearly and make the right decision for you.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy talks about the intensity of the emotions that accompany a new infidelity situation. Dr. Murphy explains why you may have conflicting thoughts during the start of an affair, how to find clarity with your uncomfortable feelings, and her tips for achieving the outcome you desire in your infidelity situation.

How can you find clarity about your thoughts surrounding couples therapy or counseling? If you already feel sure about ending your relationship, what are your reasons for wanting to go?

Before going to couples therapy, you need to have a clear understanding of your reason for attending. According to Dr. Marie Murphy, many people go into couple's therapy because they're looking to stall difficult conversations, they feel obligated to attend, or they want help facilitating a breakup. But Dr. Murphy says that it is not a guaranteed or automatic solution — you will still have feelings of discomfort associated with ending the relationship regardless of what your therapist does.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy discusses how to determine if couple's therapy or counseling is right for you. Dr. Murphy talks about justifying your reasons for attending counseling, the desire for a deeper understanding before ending a relationship, and the distinction between therapy and coaching.

If you've had an affair that's now ended, you may be worried about what this secret will mean for the future of your marriage. Does keeping your cheating a secret doom your marriage to failure? Do you still deserve love and happiness after your infidelity? Will your marriage still have trust?

According to Dr. Marie Murphy, these are all common fears — but none of them are true unless you believe they are. As she says, the future of your marriage depends on what you choose to focus on after your affair has ended. If you believe you've doomed your marriage to failure because you cheated, then this may become a reality. But, if you instead focus on shifting your mindset and moving forward, you can cultivate a marriage of love, trust, and happiness.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy addresses the common fears you may have after your secret affair has ended. Dr. Murphy explains why you are in control of whether or not your infidelity poisons your marriage and how to shift your mindset from fear to growth. She also breaks down the "think, feel, act" cycle and shares her advice for moving forward with your marriage.

If you experience a major upheaval in your relationship, the disruption can feel like your world is crumbling down. How can you deal with this radical adjustment?

According to Dr. Marie Murphy, it may feel like bad shit is happening, but through destruction comes opportunities. If you deliberately choose to restructure your life from the rubble, you can build and grow your authentic self. Dr. Murphy says that to ride out uncomfortable or devastating experiences, you should ask yourself why this change is happening for you.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy pulls out a deck of tarot cards to detail how you can deal with unforeseen change in your infidelity situation. Dr. Murphy explains how The Tower card can be a symbol of opportunity, her tips for navigating difficult upheavals in your relationship, and how to restructure your life for personal growth.

Whether you have a large number of assets or are living paycheck to paycheck, breaking up with your partner can cause major financial resentment. So, how can you navigate issues around money as you go your separate ways?

During her separation from her partner, Jessie Susannah Karnatz, aka the "Money Witch," struggled with feelings of financial regret and resentment. Then, she received a piece of advice that changed her entire perspective. Her mother told her: "You made a bad investment. Cut your losses and move on." This helped Jessie Susannah reframe her past choices and create a better financial future — and now she helps her clients do the same.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy sits down with Jessie Susannah Karnatz, aka the "Money Witch," to discuss how to navigate issues around money during a breakup. Jessie Susannah shares her advice for overcoming financial resentment, the value of looking at your former relationship as a business investment, and how to learn from your past decisions so you can create a more fulfilling future. Stay tuned.

When you've formed a bond with your affair partner, it can be a grinding experience when that connection abruptly stops. So how can you overcome the pain of being ghosted?

Dr. Marie Murphy says you are responsible for your sense of satisfaction, and if you're struggling to heal from the loss of a relationship, you will have to change your thinking. By thinking differently about your ghosting experience, you can lessen the intensity and reduce your pain in the future. According to Dr. Murphy, the first step is to accept what you are currently feeling — then you can start to write a new story.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy talks about dealing with the painful emotions of being ghosted by your affair partner. Listen as Dr. Murphy discusses how to think differently about your experience to relieve your pain, why it's reasonable to desire an explanation, and her personal experience with a severed relationship.