ADHD Mums

On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane is joined by Ange as they explore the theme of perfectionism and its relationship with ADHD. They share personal experiences, starting with a humorous account of their chaotic mornings, highlighting the imperfect aspects of their lives. Ange, an ADHD coach, reflects on her perfectionist tendencies, rooted in childhood, where she would tear out entire pages if not perfect.

 Ange delves into her ADHD diagnosis at 35, sharing the challenges she faced in transitioning from one-on-one client work to leadership roles. The conversation navigates through various dimensions of perfectionism, discussing its impact on tasks, work, and self-worth. Both Jane and Ange emphasise the connection between perfectionism and shame, exploring how negative feedback and societal expectations contribute to this mindset. They discuss the difficulty of breaking the cycle and the importance of self-compassion, self-discovery, and courage in the recovery process.

Ange highlights the need for individuals to recognise their values, strengths, and preferences, encouraging authenticity. Ange shares a coaching example where challenging ingrained beliefs about laundry allowed a client to reclaim her Wednesdays. This episode sheds light on the complexity of perfectionism, its intersection with ADHD, and the steps toward recovery and self-acceptance.

Find out more about Angie here:

⁠https://angenennie.com.au/

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Jane interviews Jessica Burgess, Psychologist on this expert view on Relationships (romantic) and ADHD.

Highlights

• Jane talks about how she is hyperactive ADHD and her husband has self diagnosed inattentive ADHD and how that can create friction.
• Jess talks about her relationships and how these have worked over the last few years
• Jane and Jess talk about dividing house tasks and the balance/battle on time.
• Jess talks about little known reasons that ADHD can impact relationships.
• How we can take responsibility for our symptoms and how they effect relationships
• Jess explains how inattentive ADHD can look calm on the outside but the person will be hit with anxiety at some point.
• Jess and Jane discuss how to communicate frustration in a way that's productive and helpful rather than creating conflict.

You can listen to Jess' other episodes here:

Anxiety and ADHD

https://open.spotify.com/episode/17xW5V9PKkyncYUAnjVH1I?si=qk-_ko1yS9-vDUN6nkPJ7A

High performance and ADHD

https://open.spotify.com/episode/7sJmg4cjhe8mlme12KDITG?si=OIOMIWK5SRO2l7Rfm6qR-g

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Jane is joined by Jasmine Meek - the Bayside Doula who was denied a diagnosis last episode and left in a very precarious position mental health wise.

We follow on her journey, what did she do after her last appointment and how is she feeling now?

Highlights

• Is Jasmine currently medicated?
• Did she go back to her GP and/or another psychiatrist?
• How has this impacted her life?
• What was the process like and how is she going?

First two parts of the story are here:

1. Preparing for a Diagnosis Appointment https://open.spotify.com/episode/4lmaXn1P2UcKrMyK4RTFGo?si=yFUj3RhMQyewIK0_Cw2XOQ

2. Denied a Diagnosis https://open.spotify.com/episode/3cDxOMa2Zq3TbUxM8fyTLQ?si=tCNL8m7UQxKrMVfGd5j5ug

Check out Jasmine's website and information about her business here as a doula in Brisbane.

https://www.thebaysidedoula.com/

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane welcomes Dr. Jacinta Thomson, a clinical psychologist with expertise in ADHD and autism, for a discussion on the intersection of these neurodivergences. Jacinta introduces the complexity of distinguishing between ADHD and autism, emphasising the unique challenges faced by individuals who may exhibit traits of both conditions. Jane and Jacinta delve into the outdated stereotypes associated with autism and how these perceptions can hinder accurate recognition.

Jacinta sheds light on the DSM criteria for autism, highlighting differences in relating to others, communication, and interacting with the environment, and advocates for a neuroaffirming approach, emphasising identity-first language to acknowledge that neurodivergent conditions are intrinsic parts of an individual's identity. The conversation touches on how neurodivergent brains process information, sensory sensitivities, and the need for routine.

The discussion takes a personal turn as Jane shares her experience with a friend's autism diagnosis and the nuances of social interactions. Jacinta explains the subtle ways ADHD and autism traits may manifest in social settings, exploring the challenges of non-verbal communication, understanding implied meanings, and navigating sensory overload. The conversation highlights the importance of recognising the individualised nature of these neurodivergences and tailoring support accordingly, fostering a deeper understanding of the complexities involved.

If you'd like to know more about Dr Jacinta Thomson check her out here: www.timetountangle.com.au/

Disclaimer from Dr Jacinta Thomson

It is crucial to note that the information shared in the following episode is for general educational and informational purposes only. The content presented here is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any condition, and may not fully capture the nuances of your experience. This conversation does not constitute medical or psychiatric advice and is not a therapeutic session. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for personalised guidance from your treating health practitioner.

If you or someone you know is seeking assistance or clarification regarding ADHD or Autism, we strongly encourage you to consult with a qualified healthcare professional who can provide tailored advice based on a thorough assessment of your specific circumstances.

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane is joined by Shantelle Poynter! Jane and Shantelle explore the popularity of Shantelle’s previous episodes, touching on topics like self-hatred, ADHD, and relationships. The engaging banter between Jane and Shantelle sets the tone for a candid and relatable conversation about the challenges and triumphs of being an ADHD mom.

Jane and Shantelle delve into the theme of "mum experiences," reflecting on the concept of "mum fails" and how the term may not accurately capture the essence of parenting mishaps. They share personal anecdotes, highlighting the humorous side of neurodivergent experiences, including an amusing yet potentially serious incident involving Shantelle leaving her car running for four hours in a busy shopping centre.

If you'd like to hear Shantelle's other episodes here they are:

Self Hatred and ADHD

https://open.spotify.com/episode/5aI7T0w0WtdrbZjYn0S1Az?si=ff1074f491684d72

Relationships and ADHD

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1sP3yrwjEDE3SYlTYhmQrA?si=xmIISazqRfGhl9DEQc_FKg

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane welcomes Lael Stone, an educator, TEDx speaker, author, and parenting counsellor, to discuss raising emotionally intelligent children in neurodiverse families. Lael's extensive background in working with families for over 20 years, especially in the realm of birth education, postnatal trauma counselling, and parenting education, makes her a valuable resource for this topic.

Jane and Lael dive into a conversation about the challenges parents face in maintaining emotional intelligence in neurodiverse families. Lael emphasises the importance of self-compassion, acknowledging the difficulties of parenting in today's stressful environment, and the need to release judgment and self-criticism. The discussion touches on permissive parenting and the struggle parents face in setting boundaries, especially in neurodiverse families where emotional regulation can be challenging. Lael advocates for building a tolerance for handling children's big feelings and the significance of modelling healthy ways to express and move emotions.

 Jane and Lael also explore the concept of self-care for parents, acknowledging the difficulty of finding time for oneself. Lael suggests embracing micro-moments of self-care throughout the day, involving children in these moments, and redefining self-care beyond traditional expectations. The conversation highlights the importance of creating supportive communities and breaking the myth of perfect parenting, aiming for a realistic and compassionate approach.

Check out more about Lael Stone here:

https://laelstone.com.au/

(I love her book!)

Follow Jane on @adhdmums on IG

Join Jane in her community FB group called

ADHD Mum's in Australia - Podcast here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/777102743903210/

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Jane is joined by Tania Waring, a lawyer and advocate/care coordinator mum of three neurodiverse boys. Tania is very experienced in advocacy for her children to get what they need at school. Tania has also completed her honours in Psychology and is passionate about inclusive education and improving outcomes for children in the schooling system.

Jane and Tania share personal experiences and highlight the need for more understanding and support from educators, as well as emphasising the importance of normalising these experiences and finding hope through the stories of others who have faced similar challenges.

Highlights

• What should you do if you find your classroom teacher doesn't match your child's personality?
• How to handle teacher parent meetings
• What can you do to get the best result
• Does the squeaky wheel really get the oil?
• How does allocation work?
• What can we do at home to make it easier on our kids?

Check out Tania’s melt down episode here

https://open.spotify.com/episode/7IdNqpCHo8IFLWAJ9axEFC?si=glZJspt5RLGpxSVknytqLg

and Tania's episode on Boys and the Australian School System

https://open.spotify.com/episode/0os4ZsrjXEY9yTyWJqmf6M?si=GmkIpm5zRKu8GlmBe6HZBQ

Here is the book I mentioned I LOVED:

All the pieces of me by Libby Scott

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane is joined by guest, Matilda Boseley who recently released the book 'The Year I Met My Brain.'

Matilda was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult and she shares her tumultuous journey and the inspiration behind writing a guide based on her personal experiences. Jane and Matilda navigate the unique challenges of completing a project with an ADHD brain, and discuss the unexpected support Matilda received from her partner.

The conversation delves into the gender dynamics of ADHD, illuminating how societal expectations shape the experience differently for men and women. Matilda sheds light on the challenges faced by women in managing the mental load and the intersection of ADHD with gender roles and norms. They explore broader implications beyond individual experiences, offering valuable insights into the complexities of ADHD.

Matilda passionately critiques the hurdles in accessing proper ADHD diagnosis and treatment, highlighting the societal expectations contributing to the struggle. Jane and Matilda reflect on the resilience cultivated while navigating life with ADHD, emphasising the importance of embracing imperfections. 

 Thank you for listening! Make sure to check out Matilda’s book, ‘The Year I Met My Brain’, and leave a 5-star review if you enjoyed this episode!

Order Matilda's book here:

⁠https://www.penguin.com.au/authors/matilda-boseley

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane is joined by Tammie to discuss her journey of receiving a late-stage ADHD diagnosis at the age of 40.

Tammie shares her experiences with different medications, highlighting the positive impact of Dexamphetamine and the challenges she faced with Vyvanse, as well as how Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) became instrumental in managing her ADHD-related struggles.

Tammie shares on how Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria has impacted her life and how she manages it day to day.

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On this episode of The ADHD Mums Podcast, Jane introduces Fiona McIntyre from Face Your Flaws Coaching, an expert on addiction and ADHD. Fiona, a life coach with over 20 years of experience, was diagnosed with ADHD at 47 and has successfully overcome addiction challenges. She shares her personal journey of losing 35 kilos and embarking on a sober lifestyle after 30 years of binge drinking. Fiona, a mother of two neurodivergent children, emphasises that a diagnosis is not an identity and is passionate about helping others facing alcohol, weight loss, and ADHD management challenges.

Jane and Fiona delve into the complexities of addiction, specifically focusing on food and alcohol, which they believe are prevalent challenges for ADHD mums. Fiona discusses her struggles with binge eating and binge drinking, highlighting the connection between ADHD, dopamine deficiency, and the pursuit of substances that provide a dopamine hit. Fiona emphasises the importance of addressing emotional issues, trauma, and self-esteem concerns that often underlie addictive behaviours.

Fiona speaks about her ADHD diagnosis journey, her experience with medication, and the role of self-beliefs in triggering addictive responses. Fiona advocates for narrative therapy to challenge and reframe the stories individuals tell themselves about their addiction. They explore alternatives to traditional support groups like AA, suggesting individualised approaches such as alcohol coaching, online communities, and personalised strategies tailored to each person's unique situation.

Fiona shares her motivational mantra, "I love myself enough to stay sober," and stresses the significance of understanding and challenging the narratives one creates around addiction. She concludes by encouraging individuals to seek support, embrace their personal strengths, and recognise that lapses are a normal part of the recovery process.

Find out more about Fiona here:

⁠https://www.faceyourflawscoaching.com/

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