Some breakups come after a long period of unhappiness in the relationship. Other times, they seem to come out of nowhere. The latter is becoming more common with “blindside divorces” on the rise. That’s what VICE writer Ashley Fike and I are chatting about today. 

Ashley and I talk about the many dynamics of a breakup that seems sudden, from all angles including the perspective of the one ending things. AND we give powerful, practical guidance for anyone struggling with a sudden breakup. We discuss: 

🖤Both of our stories with being involved in a blindside divorce. 

🖤”Perceived suddenness.”

🖤Why blindside divorces are becoming more common. 

🖤The grief the person ending things feels. 

🖤5 tips for healing from a blindside divorce or breakup. 

Ashley is doing a lot of cool writing these days! Connect with her on LinkedIn.

🍷🍷Want to buy me a glass of wine? Head to my Patreon here.   🍷

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

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Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

You don’t have to navigate your breakup alone. Download my free guide, Breakup Brain here.

Bad breakup? Yet are you still thinking about all of the good times? 

The good things about your ex? 

The love you had that you think you will never find again? 

🍷🍷Did you find this episode helpful? Buy me a glass of wine and join my Patron here.

I am here to normalize this stage in the breakup healing journey so that all my listeners will know that this is just that, normal, natural, and even healthy. 

There are so many reasons why you might be thinking about the good times in the midst of a bad breakup. Today I will cover just five of them. 

What do you think? Can you relate? Let me know in the comments. Questions about this stage? Include it and I will answer it in an upcoming episode. 

Do you want the free resource on the psychology of breakups that I mention in the episode? Download my free guide, Breakup Brain here.

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

_______________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

I hope you will enjoy this gem from my archives!

Want breakup support? Schedule a FREE first 1:1 session here.

Did you know that I have a breakup workbook? Buy The Broken Heart Repair Kit here.

I hope you will enjoy this BONUS episode from my sister podcast, Sex and the Solo Girl.

When did you lose your virginity? Did you lose it later than those around you? If so, do you consider yourself to be a late bloomer? This week’s guest does, and he has an inspirational story to share with anyone who has ever felt like a square peg. 

Welcome to the show Dillon Birdsall, the director of the film The V-Card. 

Watch it here: https://allthebirdsllc.gumroad.com/

🍷🍷Want to buy me a glass of wine? Head to my Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/c/janiceformichella   🍷

I REALLY liked this chat! 

In this memorable conversation Dillon Birdsall and I chat about: 

💮What it meant to Dillon to be a late bloomer

💮Dillon’s virginity story

💮Janice’s virginity story 

💮The crosses we all bear in life

💮The manosphere and the Incel movement

💮Words of wisdom for “late bloomers” 

Curious about The V-Card? Here’s the link once again: https://www.allthebirdsllc.com/films 

AND - check out the production company on IG: https://www.instagram.com/all.the.birds.film/

The their website: http://www.allthebirdsllc.com 

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

_______________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

You don’t have to navigate your breakup alone. Download my free guide, Breakup Brain here: https://janiceformichella.com/resources/#BreakupBrain

And for even more breakup resources, download my podcast, Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On wherever you listen to podcasts here: https://janiceformichella.com/breakups-broken-hearts-and-moving-on/ 

Are there “negative” emotions? What does your gut tell you? 

Is rage a negative thing to feel? Maybe…or it might be a gift and a teacher that shows you what your priorities are, what you value, what you will not tolerate, or what you need to shift in your life. 

Patty Alfonso is a powerhouse of wisdom and I highly recommend her work. She has a program that any woman who wants to embrace their erotic curiosity should explore. Visit ⁠http://www.pattyalfonso.com/innocence⁠ to learn more and connect with her about an intro call. 

When we allow rage to become a teacher we can also allow it to become scared. Something to help guide us. 

In this powerful episode, Patty Alfonso and I connect to talk about: 

-The definition of rage

-Our early experiences with rage

-”Seeing red” 

-The times I have been most angry in my life

-How to recognize rage

-Tips for working rage through our bodies

-Preventing rage from becoming toxic

-Allowing rage to become sacred

🍷🍷Want to buy me a glass of wine? Head to my Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/c/janiceformichella   🍷

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

____________________________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

I know that no-contact works. And I know how hard it can be. 

Let me be your breakup buddy! Schedule a free 1:1 session here.

This episode is for all of those who may know that no-contact will help but aren’t quite there yet. My goal is to help you develop faith in the process. That is the first step to executing this radical form of self-care and preservation. 

🍷🍷 Did you find this episode helpful? Buy me a glass of wine and join my Patron here. 🍷🍷

Quotes from this episode: 

“Even if you don’t exchange harsh words, words can hurt. If you are suffering because of your breakup it is important to show up for yourself and go to great lengths to prevent more suffering. No contact is a sure-fire way to do that.” -Janice Formichella 

“You cannot heal from pain if you are continuing to put yourself in contact with the source of it.” -Janice Formichella

“You will continue to get burned if you keep putting your hand in the fire.” -Janice Formichella 

“You cannot wean yourself from something harmful if you keep taking it.” -Janice Formichella

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

____________________________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

🖤 Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who did things you didn’t think others would believe? 

🖤 Have you ever been in a relationship that made you feel trapped and intrigued at the same time? 

⁠Want to buy me a glass of wine? Head to my Patreon here. ⁠⁠

🖤 Have you ever come out of a relationship that you now consider toxic? 

You will definitely relate to my conversation with Dr. Stephen Paul Edwards. And as we say in the episode, there is SO my power in relating to each other. 

The Venus Fly Trap is Stephen’s exploration and vulnerable book about his experience with obsessive chaotic love. But this episode is much more than a chat about his book, it is a chat about both our experiences with chaotic and sometimes abusive relationships and our journeys to find ourselves once again. 

I highly recommend this video to anyone who has ever felt that they stayed in a relationship longer than they should have. 

A bit about what we cover in this powerful conversation: 

-How Stephen became a fly in his relationship with a Venus Flytrap

-Love vs lust

-My own story of being in a relationship with an alcoholic 

-The feeling “what have I gotten myself into?”

-Why we ignore red flags

-Feeling scared that no one will believe your partner’s behaviors 

-The judgement of others 

-Rebuilding your self-identity after a chaotic relationship

🖤 Are you ready to dive into The Venus Fly Trap books? I encourage you to do so! 

⁠You can find them on Dr. Edward’s website here.⁠

Let me be your breakup buddy! Get direct access to my calendar here to schedule a FREE consultation.

Is it time to say GOOD BYE to your breakup? This week’s episode is for you!

In this episode I cover: 

-Why goodbyes are so painful for us

-Why saying goodbye to your breakup and putting it behind us is do damn hard

-The power of goodbyes

-A bunch of tips to say goodbye to your breakup

Get a pen and paper - it’s time to be intentional about your healing. 

Extra episodes to support your healing journey: 

10-day no-contact series

The no-contact rule: 5 tips for success

A letter to your ex

Quotes from this episode: 

“Faith is hard to embrace when you don’t know what is on the other side.” 

“It can be hard to leave something that isn’t good for you. Give yourself grace.”

“You deserve a relationship that is fully functional.” 

“I believe in the power of no contact.” 

“Have you ever set your mind to something that is out of reach? Do the same for your breakup.” 

Want to connect?

Visit my website to learn about my work here.

IG: @janiceformichella

Love Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On? Let me know by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. 

_______________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

Are we in a dating recession? Or a dating *correction*? 

Three sassy ladies from ALL around the world are here to tell you what they think! 

Eeeeeek! This week we have THREE J’s, Janice, Julie, and Jasmine, chatting about the TRUTH about the so-called dating recession and why so many women are opting out of dating. 

Pour a glass of wine and settle in - this is a spunky conversation.

🍷🍷Ready to buy *me* a glass of wine? Treat me on my Patreon here.

We cover:

-Stats on dating and the so-called “dating recession”

-Our own stories deciding to opt-out of dating

-How draining it can be to carry the emotional load in relationships 

-Why so many women aren’t motivated to date these days

-The male reaction to this growing trend

-The end of pick-me culture

-Sex and opting-out

-What we all love about being single

Want Julie’s book? Found, Swiping Right On Me to Find Love is SUCH a fun read!! Buy it here.

And connect with Julie on her website here.

Remember, I want to be your breakup buddy. Schedule your free first session here. 

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

____________________________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.

Let’s talk about ghosting! 

BOO on your who do it - and for those who have it happen to them - you have come to the right place. 

WOW - I am joined by an actual ghosting expert to help prevent it AND to help people navigate it. Welcome to the show Gretta Perlmutter!! 

Been ghosted? We got you! 

Ghosted before and feel bad? We got you! 

Want to be a better communicator and join the anti-ghosting movement? You are SO in the right place. 

🍷🍷Ready to buy me a glass of wine? Treat me on my Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/c/janiceformichella

👉👉PLEASE go show Gretta some podcast love! 

Learn more about her work and the podcast, Coping With Ghosting on her website here.

Today Gretta and I talk about:

-Our personal experiences *being* ghosted

-Cheating ghosts (extra BOO)

-What ghosting is NOT

-Our personal and vulnerable stories about ghosting someone

-How not to BE a ghoster

-How to breakup with someone

-Navigating ghosting 

❓Want to learn about my breakup or secure attachment coaching? Head over to my website: ⁠JaniceFormichella.com⁠ 

and my IG: ⁠@janiceformichella⁠

⁠Download The Broken Heart Repair Kit: The 3-step Method to Beating Your Breakup ⁠

💙💜

_______________________________________________________________

Breakups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On with Janice Formichella is an inclusive space for all adults who are looking to heal their hearts and have happy relationships. I believe that love is love and that there are a wide variety of different types of relationships and that all are valid. I recognize each individual's right to self-identify. As a podcast host, I am dedicated to making this a safe space for all and strive to portray that in my content. I welcome feedback on my efforts and thank you for being a part of the community.