Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman

“What To Do When You Get Dumped” author-illustrator, mother-daughter duo, Suzy Hopkins and Hallie Bateman take on heartbreak in a refreshing way in their new graphic novel. Discover tips on healing from a breakup, moving on, and leaning into love again. Plus, we have this week’s Dear Damona question: 

• Why do my Hinge matches like my profile but then never write to me?

Grab your copy of Suzy and Hallie’s graphic novel, “What To Do When You Get Dumped” by visiting: https://www.bloomsbury.com/us/what-to-do-when-you-get-dumped-9781639731893/

Let’s get real! Dating feels harder than it should be right now leaving many feeling emotionally drained. That’s why Damona is hosting a special open call: Dealing with Dating Burnout TOMORROW Wednesday, January 22nd at 4p.m. PST / 7p.m. EST. Learn quick tools to protect your energy while staying open to connection, how to recognize if your dating patterns are draining you, and simple shifts to make dating feel more aligned with your values. Visit DamonaHoffman.com/DatingBurnout

And if you want more tools, support, and community, spend the entire day with Damona and her team while you heal your heart and renew your faith in romance at our one-day-only F the Fairy Tale Virtual Retreat. This live online event is almost SOLD OUT so grab your ticket before it’s gone at DamonaHoffman.com/Retreat

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to Breakups (00:00:00)  

Divorce Month (00:01:06)  

The Inspiration for the Book (00:03:30)  

The Role of Tarot (00:04:51)  

Navigating Trauma (00:05:53)  

The Healing Process (00:08:25)  

Collaborative Writing Process (00:10:16)  

Depth of the Story (00:12:38)  

Advice and Wisdom (00:15:53)  

Encouragement in Writing (00:16:37)  

Daily Meditations (00:17:52)  

Writing Through Pain (00:18:50)  

Forgiveness vs. Moving Forward (00:20:27)  

Finding Peace (00:22:50)  

Behold the Badger (00:23:10)  

Reclaiming Spaces (00:28:14)  

Rewriting Memories (00:30:06)  

Making a "What Was True" List (00:32:28)  

The list of issues (00:34:07)  

Personal truths in healing (00:35:47)  

Rewriting the script (00:37:21)  

Counseling for recovery (00:38:50)  

Grief and awakening (00:39:30)  

Rediscovering desire (00:41:17)  

Unpopular opinions on dating apps (00:43:06)  

The value of being single (00:44:26)  

Closing thoughts and book promotion (00:46:40)  

Dating Apps and Burnout (00:50:56)  

Understanding Dating Mechanisms (00:52:20)  

Perception of Dating Experiences (00:53:32)  

Introducing the Fairy Tale Online Retreat (00:56:08)  

Upcoming Episode Teaser (00:57:21) 

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Orna & Matthew Walters, founders of Love On Purpose, share the knowledge and insights from their new book, “Getting It Right This Time: Break Free From Your Hidden Blocks To Finding Lasting Love”. You’ll learn how you might be standing in your own way when it comes to love and what you can do to get yourself back on track. And our Dear Damona question this week is:

• I want to pay for Premium on one app? Should I choose Tinder, Bumble, or OKCupid?

Grab a copy of “Getting It Right This Time: Break Free From Your Hidden Blocks To Finding Lasting Love” by visiting: https://www.loveonpurpose.com/getting-it-right-this-time/

Craving another soothing meditation, transformational tools, and a sense of community? For the first time ever, Damona is offering a one-day virtual retreat on February 1st. Enrollment is NOW OPEN for The Fairy Tale Therapy Online Retreat but spaces are limited. Get your ticket now at  DamonaHoffman.com/retreat 

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)  

Guests Introduction (00:00:56)  

Background of the Guests (00:02:10)  

Discussion on Title Choice (00:03:22)  

Challenges in Dating (00:03:41)  

Dating in the Modern Era (00:04:25)  

Myth of Effortless Love (00:05:03)  

Conflict in Relationships (00:06:54)  

Understanding Triggers (00:09:25)  

Authenticity in Communication (00:11:56)  

Patterns in Relationships (00:12:33)  

Brain Science of Attraction (00:14:13)  

Personal Experiences with Love (00:15:17)  

The Impact of Past Trauma (00:15:50)  

Contrasting Upbringings (00:16:13)  

Subconscious Patterns in Relationships (00:17:23)  

Understanding Love Imprint (00:18:36)  

Evaluating Relationship Needs (00:20:01)  

Misinterpreting Feelings (00:20:56)  

Commitment Before Understanding (00:21:56)  

The Danger of Rushing Relationships (00:22:41)  

Tools for Self-Discovery (00:23:54)  

Visceral Responses to Love Imprints (00:25:15) 

Meaning in Past Experiences (00:26:10)  

Chemistry vs. Love Imprint (00:28:21)  

The Complexity of Love Imprints (00:29:16)  

Broadening Relationship Perspectives (00:30:34)  

Understanding Casual Alcoholism (00:31:16)  

Realizing Personal Responsibility (00:31:36)  

The Love Imprint Concept (00:32:30)  

Navigating Relationship Myths (00:33:36)  

Recognizing Relationship Intentions (00:34:39)  

The Fantasy of Being Chosen (00:35:36)  

Growth Through Relationships (00:37:11)  

Using Dating Apps Effectively (00:38:07)  

The Reality of Dating (00:39:36)  

The Importance of Clarity in Relationships (00:42:37)  

Manifestation in Relationships (00:45:40)  

Love Imprints and Relationship Dynamics (00:46:25)  

Self-Discovery in Relationships (00:47:56)  

Unpopular Opinions on Dating (00:48:28)  

Deal Breakers in Relationships (00:49:52)  

Optimizing Dating Profiles (00:55:00)  

Choosing the Right Dating App (00:59:33)  

Fairy Tale Therapy Retreat (01:00:44) 

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Carol Allen, Vedic astrologer, returns to kick off 2025 with her annual love forecast in an episode packed with guidance and revelations. Whether you’re single and searching, navigating a partnership, or simply curious about how the stars align for you, this episode will illuminate your path to love by highlighting the times you should lean into love, when you should play it cool and when to follow up on old flames. Plus, our Dear Damona question of the week:

• What’s up with all this lovebombing on dating apps?

Map out your year and your journey in love with a Personal Success Calendar from Carol Allen. Head to DamonaHoffman.com/mycalendar to get 60% off your personalized astrology daily forecast.

Craving another soothing meditation, transformational tools, and a sense of community? For the first time ever, Damona is offering a one-day virtual retreat on February 1st. The Fairy Tale Therapy Online Retreat is available by invitation-only and Damona is hand-selecting each participant in this life-changing event. Apply today at DamonaHoffman.com/retreat

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to Vedic Astrology (00:00:13)  

Understanding Vedic Astrology (00:05:46)  

Auspicious Dates for Love (00:11:23)  

The Importance of Venus (00:12:42)  

Transits and Their Impact (00:15:08)  

The Sati Sati Cycle and the US (00:16:09)  

Impact of 2020 on Relationships (00:17:15)  

Transitioning Relationships (00:18:22)  

Rahu Periods and Global Chaos (00:18:55)  

Commitment to Joy (00:19:24)  

Venus in 2025 (00:20:20)  

Venus Retrograde Dates (00:21:05)  

Revisiting Past Connections (00:22:20)  

Upcoming Venus Favorable Periods (00:24:40)  

Navigating Tricky Times (00:25:58)  

Mars Retrograde Impact (00:26:21)  

April Challenges (00:27:33)  

Mercury Retrograde Overview (00:28:40)  

Mercury Retrograde Dates (00:29:58)  

Jupiter and Marriage (00:31:07)  

Jupiter Retrograde Timeline (00:32:21)  

Winter Weddings Warning (00:33:05)  

Engagement Timing (00:33:20)  

Wedding Chart Insights (00:34:25)  

Personal Success Calendar (00:34:27)  

Astrological Techniques for Love (00:35:07)  

Jupiter and Mars Relationship Technique (00:36:32)  

Celebrity Astrology Examples (00:37:47)  

Taylor Swift's Chart Analysis (00:40:13)  

Beyoncé's Astrological Insights (00:42:27)  

Personal Success Calendar Benefits (00:44:08)  

Unpopular Opinion on Dating (00:46:01)  

Listener Question on Love Bombing (00:47:59)  

Understanding Love Bombing (00:50:09)  

Patterns in Relationships (00:51:19)  

Recognizing Manipulation (00:52:22)  

Setting Boundaries in Dating (00:53:17)  

Importance of Offline Interaction (00:54:30)  

Evaluating Reactions to Boundaries (00:55:55)  

Sorting Out Emotional Manipulation (00:57:29)  

Upcoming Fairy Tale Retreat (00:58:36)  

Astrological Calendar Offer (00:59:47)

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona offers a visualization to guide you through the ups and downs of this year and plant seeds for a 2025 full of love in this special minisode. Then, she shares her word of the year along with an exercise that you can try today to begin transforming your love journey.

Craving another soothing meditation, transformational tools, and a sense of community? For the first time ever, Damona is offering a one-day virtual retreat on February 1st. The Fairy Tale Therapy Online Retreat is available by invitation-only and Damona is hand-selecting each participant in this life-changing event. Apply today at DamonaHoffman.com/retreat

The song in this episode is called Meditation On Love and is by Kirk Osamayo. It is from the Free Music Archive, license type CC BY.

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to the Episode (00:00)

Tangible Love Goals (00:09)

Visualization and Meditation Introduction (01:04)

Year-End Reflection (02:17)

Letting Go of Past Disappointments (04:09)

Visualizing a Hopeful Future (05:54)

The Concept of Grace (09:11)

Grace as a Game Changer (10:37)

Final Thoughts on Grace (11:53)

New Year Exercise (13:01)

Invitation for Feedback (14:36)

Closing Remarks (15:46)

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona shares reflections on the swiping stats from 2024 based on Tinder and Bumble trends from their year-end reports. Then she looks forward to the future to predict what you can expect in the world of dating and relationships in 2025. 

Are you feeling burned out on dating—like you’re giving so much but getting nothing back? Then join Damona on February 1st for a one-day virtual retreat - Fairy Tale Therapy, where you’ll reconnect with yourself and a community of hopeful daters who get it. Together, you’ll set powerful intentions for your love life, uncover new dating tools, and recharge your self-love battery so you can step into the new year with clarity and confidence. Apply asap, spaces are limited and each attendee will be hand-picked by Damona: DamonaHoffman.com/retreat

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to Holiday Challenges (00:00)

Reflections on 2024 Trends (00:01)

Tinder Year in Swipe Report (00:02)

Vision Boards in Dating (00:04)

Bumble Global Dating Trends (00:05)

Micro Romance and Its Impact (00:05)

Community Building Through Content (00:08)

Emotional Stability in Relationships (00:12)

Guy BFFs as Influencers (00:13)

Predictions for 2025 (00:14)

The Year of the Woman (00:15)

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Laura Stassi, author and host of the Dating While Gray podcast, reveals how many of our dating challenges and solutions remain the same, regardless of age, gender, or sexuality. And Laura joins Damona for a special Dear Damona segment to answer your questions, like:

Listen to the Dating While Gray podcast wherever you get your podcasts and be sure to follow Laura on Instagram @DatingWhileGray

Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator by visiting: DamonaHoffman.com/program

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)  

Guest Introduction (00:01:15)  

Laura's Background (00:02:19)  

Podcast Journey (00:05:41)  

Media Representation of Older Daters (00:06:21)  

Dating Trends and Challenges (00:10:34)  

Dating Attitudes Across Ages (00:11:57)  

Learning from Dating Experiences (00:14:04)  

Shifting Dating Etiquette (00:15:38)  

The rigidity of dating (00:16:16)  

Compromise in dating (00:17:22)  

Dating models and etiquette (00:18:36)  

Older daters' routines (00:19:47)  

Generosity in dating (00:20:46)  

Communication in dating (00:22:12)  

Meeting people offline (00:24:52)  

Overcoming fear of being alone (00:27:57)  

Reconnecting with past acquaintances (00:29:00)  

Long-distance dating considerations (00:31:01)  

Exploring Relocation for Love (00:31:59)  

Importance of Community (00:32:21)  

Dating as Discovery (00:34:13)  

Listener Question on Self-Esteem (00:36:20)  

Vulnerability in Sharing Challenges (00:37:26)  

Stigmas Around Health Issues (00:39:46)  

Navigating Disclosure in Dating (00:40:57)  

Redefining Sexual Intimacy (00:42:28)  

Intentional Dating Post-Pandemic (00:44:01)  

Comfort with Oneself (00:45:18)  

Closing Remarks and Resources (00:46:14)  

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Aleeza Ben Shalom, celebrity matchmaker of Netflix’s Jewish Matchmaking, shares actionable advice to help you find your path on this dating journey with wisdom from her new book “Matchmaker, Matchmaker: Find Me a Love That Lasts”. And the Dear Damona question this week is: What are the signs that someone is interested in you?

Pre-order your copy of Aleeza's new book, “Matchmaker, Matchmaker: Find Me a Love That Lasts”, by visiting: https://marriagemindedmentor.com/book/

And, follow Aleeza on Instagram @AleezaBenShalom!

Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator by visiting: DamonaHoffman.com/program

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Intro (00:00:00)  

Finding your personal dating playbook (00:01:03)  

Meet Aleeza Ben Shalom (00:02:14)  

Aleeza's journey as a matchmaker (00:02:50)  

Date them till you hate them (00:04:02)  

The three-date rule (00:05:30)  

Clarity in dating decisions (00:06:37)  

The importance of staying curious (00:07:25)  

Navigating difficult conversations (00:10:30)  

Rejection as a form of protection (00:13:20)  

The five-day challenge (00:14:42)  

Five Day Challenge Explained (00:15:04)

Clarifying the No Touching Rule (00:15:49)

Tips for the Challenge (00:16:36)

Importance of Connection in Dating (00:18:39)

Dating Dynamics and Tests (00:19:47)

Rules for Same-Sex Couples (00:20:33)

Calculating Relationship Compatibility (00:21:06)

Interests vs. Core Values (00:22:44)

Significance of Family Values (00:24:22)

Understanding Timelines in Relationships (00:26:53)

Self-Discovery in Dating (00:29:16)

The Five-Year Relationship Evolution (00:29:50)  

The 555 Dating Rule Explained (00:30:23)  

Building Momentum in Dating (00:31:04)  

Chemistry and Intentional Dating (00:34:13)  

Soulmate Clarity Concept (00:37:38)  

Navigating Workplace Relationships (00:40:41)  

Dating Gestures and Vibes (00:45:35)  

Small Moves in Dating (00:46:29)  

Attraction Beyond Age (00:47:22)  

Investing in Clear Signals (00:48:52)  

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

This week’s episode is dedicated to YOU! The holidays are here, bringing all the cozy vibes, family gatherings, and… yep, those inevitable relationship questions. Damona answers all your pressing holiday love questions, from family expectations to finding romance under the mistletoe.She will answer your top questions like:

Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator by visiting: DamonaHoffman.com/program

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

TIMESTAMPS

Intro (00:00:00)  

Uncertainty in Relationships (00:00:01)  

Light-hearted Commentary (00:00:03)  

Holiday Dating Dilemmas (00:00:06)  

Listener's Voice Memo (00:01:55)  

Annie's Relationship Concerns (00:02:01)  

Ghosting After Four Months (00:07:58)  

Communication Issues in Relationships (00:09:00)  

Conflict Resolution Advice (00:12:22)  

Triathlon Club Dating Dilemma (00:16:24)  

Breaking the Ice in a Club (00:16:46)  

The Benefits of Physical Activity (00:17:18)  

Navigating Group Dynamics (00:19:50)  

Using Dating Apps (00:22:02)  

Addressing Gender Roles in Dating (00:23:55)  

Finding Common Ground (00:26:12)  

Preparing for Holiday Conversations (00:29:38)  

Closing Thoughts and Future Episodes (00:30:52) 

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Lauren Frances, Love and Relationships Expert, talks all about first dates from when they start (it’s not when you think) to how to graciously end one that’s just not working for you. And our Dear Damona question of the week is, “My match is great, not a single dealbreaker, and I STILL can’t wrap my head around commitment. What now?”

Want to join Lauren’s incredible Love Magnet Makeover? Just visit DamonaHoffman.com/lovemagnet

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

Timestamps

Intro (00:00:00)  

The First Date Starts Early (00:00:09)  

Preparation for First Dates (00:00:14)  

Value of First Dates (00:01:05)  

Introducing Lauren Francis (00:02:05)  

Persistence in Publishing (00:03:09)  

Timing in Dating (00:04:38)  

Transitioning to Phone Calls (00:05:53)  

Setting Up Phone Conversations (00:07:25)  

Importance of Privacy (00:09:10)  

Breaking the Ice (00:11:21)  

Choosing the Right Date Venue (00:12:18)  

Being Seen on Dates (00:13:06)  

Creating the Right Vibe (00:15:02)  

Understanding Enthusiasm in Dating (00:16:35)  

The Enthusiasm Gap (00:20:37)  

First Dates as Your Party (00:21:37)  

Heartache Prevention Tips (00:25:12)  

Compatibility and Actions Over Words (00:30:07)  

Ghosting and Relationship Alignment (00:31:02)  

Rejection Reasons (00:32:58)  

Ending Dates Positively (00:34:04)  

Creating a Great First Impression (00:35:02)  

Love Magnet Makeover Introduction (00:36:01)  

Details of Love Magnet Makeover (00:37:04)  

A Listener's Commitment Question (00:40:04)  

Navigating Relationship Fears (00:41:07)  

Understanding Commitment (00:42:19)  

Empowerment in Relationships (00:48:00)

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Dr. Alfiee, psychologist, host of the Couched in Color podcast and founder of the AAKOMA Project, dives into attachment styles, how depression can impact a partnership, and the ways our traumas and triggers can become unearthed in new relationships. Then this week’s Dear Damona question is: I married too young and stayed too long. Can you please help me get back into the dating game?

Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator by visiting: DamonaHoffman.com/program

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

Timestamps

Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)  

Attachment Styles Overview (00:00:59)  

Expectations in Relationships (00:03:30)  

The Desire to Change Partners (00:05:04)  

The Fantasy of Relationships (00:06:13)  

Effort vs. Work in Relationships (00:08:01)  

Unpacking Emotional Baggage (00:08:35)  

Understanding Attachment Styles (00:09:55)  

Cultural Context of Attachment (00:12:04)  

Personal Experiences with Attachment (00:14:23)  

Embracing Attachment Nuances (00:15:17)  

Understanding Family Dynamics and Attachment Styles (00:16:50)  

Personal Reflection on Attachment Styles (00:17:42)  

The Impact of Community on Relationships (00:18:26)  

Navigating Triggers in Relationships (00:19:55)  

Mental Health and Medication Statistics (00:20:37)  

Stigma Around Mental Health in Communities (00:22:13)  

Dating with Mental Health Challenges (00:23:05)  

Recognizing Deal Breakers in Relationships (00:23:43)  

Changing Attitudes Towards Therapy (00:25:51)  

Generational Differences in Mental Health Views (00:27:06)  

Healing from Trauma and Relationships (00:28:08)  

The Process of Healing and Trauma Management (00:30:25)  

Distinguishing Good and Bad Butterflies (00:32:22)  

The Importance of Self-Reflection Before Dating (00:33:14)  

Understanding Triggers in Relationships (00:33:50)

Disclosing Trauma in Relationships (00:35:17)

Trust and Safety in Sharing Trauma (00:36:12)

Empowerment in Relationships (00:38:17)

Unpopular Opinions on Relationships (00:39:46)

Finding a New Relationship After Marriage (00:41:23)

Going Where the People Are (00:43:24)

Strategic Socializing for Dating (00:45:38).

Creating Momentum in Dating (00:49:04)

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Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough