Figuring Sh!t Out

jesus vs. the church.

relationship vs. religion.

faith vs. fear.

what happens when you encounter the love beyond all compare but find yourself wrestling with everything that surrounds it?

an honest confession and conversation on spiritual warfare, surrender, and learning to distinguish the voice of love from the noise of fear.

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for meditations, workshops, conversations about God, & creative awakening tools join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you in community. 

learn more & hear what members are saying: METAMORPHOSIS

inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey, 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey, 10 Day Heart Opening Journey, Digital Detox Journey's & more!!
• Bi-weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A library of 50+ meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats

For $20 your first month, join with the code MAGIC - HERE

"and what can I say of prayer? except that it feels like clean air in my lungs. i sit and i vent and i cough up dirty water and blood and something holy makes me brand new. my heart aches and then it doesn’t. that is all I know."

this episode is for anyone who has no idea how to hear God, talk to God, is confused about what they believe about God, isn't confused but is looking for new perspectives on interacting with the sacred and holy, and for anyone who knows that learning to commune + communicate with the Creator of all things might just be in their benefit but has no idea where to start.

i share how prayer has evolved for me over the years and how it's become a life-boat, an anchor, something i cannot live without and i give you a framework to use prayer to invest deeper in a relationship with God.

my prayer for you in listening to this episode - is that it inspires you to begin or deepen a dialogue of your own with God.

something sacred, special, and just yours.

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for meditations, workshops, conversations about God, & creative awakening tools join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you in community. 

learn more & hear what members are saying: METAMORPHOSIS

inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey, 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey, 10 Day Heart Opening Journey, Digital Detox Journey's & more!!
• Bi-weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A library of 50+ meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats

For $20 your first month, join with the code MAGIC - HERE

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Mentioned in the episode:

Traveling mercies - book by Anne Lamott

Podcast on Unanswered Prayer 

learning to see yourself through God's eyes -

"Fearfully and Wonderfully made

Knit together

Created - breath by breath

and piece by piece

Gifted and anointed

Created Intentionally

And on Purpose

That is what your creator says about making you. 

And yet - you make yourself small when you enter into rooms that feel like they can’t hold your loud laugh and big heart

You shrink into smithereens when the person across from you darts their eyes to the other corner of the room while you’re in conversation

You ask yourself 

Am I smart enough? Interesting enough? Skinny enough? Pretty enough? 

Am I Enough?

And you forget 

That you were fearfully 

And wonderfully made

Knit together

Created breath by breath 

Piece by piece

Gifted and anointed

Created

Intentionally 

And on purpose"

What does it mean to be fearfully and wonderfully made, to know that you were created on purpose, and to see yourself through God’s eyes instead of the world’s? In this episode of Figuring Sh!t Out, we explore self-worth, identity, and the freedom of knowing you are deeply loved, intentionally created, and already enough.

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for meditations, workshops, conversations about God, & creative awakening tools join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you in community. 

learn more & hear what members are saying: METAMORPHOSIS

inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey, 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey, 10 Day Heart Opening Journey, Digital Detox Journey's & more!!
• Bi-weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A library of 50+ meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events

For $20 your first month, join with the code MAGIC - HERE

"tear your heart out of your chest - and give it to God. there is no other healing. i swear, there is no other healing." (Yasmin Mogahed)

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what if healing isn’t about becoming the most "aligned" version of yourself, but learning to receive a love greater than your own and surrender to the path created for you? what if you could stop treating yourself like a project to complete, and let God meet you in the parts of yourself you still struggle to love?

maybe we don’t just HEAL our inner child - maybe we learn to become children again.

to surrender the exhausting responsibility of being our own healer, our own source of love, our own answer to everything.

to let ourselves be held, guided, and transformed by a love we could never earn, but is freely given.

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in case you missed the last episode:

God?

• youtube
• spotify

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for meditations, workshops, conversations about God, & creative awakening tools join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you in community. 

learn more & hear what members are saying: METAMORPHOSIS

inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey, 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey, 10 Day Heart Opening Journey, Digital Detox Journey's & more!!
• Bi-weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A library of 50+ meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events

For $20 your first month, join with the code MAGIC - HERE

plot twist: jesus.

—

For meditations, workshops, conversations about God, & creative awakening tools join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you in community. 

learn more & hear what members are saying: METAMORPHOSIS

inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey, 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey, 10 Day Heart Opening Journey, Digital Detox Journey's & more!!
• Bi-weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A library of 50+ meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events

Join at the lowest price ever HERE

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LEAVE A COMMENT & let me know WHAT this episode provoked in you, what questions you have (bc im probably also having them), and how Figuring Sh!t Out has impacted your life.

Socials:

IG: @byvanessafontana 

TIKTOK: @butterflyfountain

inquiries: [email protected]

This episode is a confession, an homage to honesty, a bid of vulnerability on a deeply personal shift happening in my life that I've let through a couple of episodes but I haven't unearthed fully because -

Well,

I've been believing lies that have kept me scared and stuck.

Yes, even (ESPECIALLY) Miss.FiguringSh!tOutYapsALotPodcastHost has fear and doubt that chokes her up.

In this episode, I share what it’s like to find yourself standing between two voices:

The voice of fear and the voice of truth.

And how to discern between the two.

We touch on healing, EMDR, perfectionism, somatic work, and these hidden lies that keep us stuck long after we’ve outgrown them.

This is Figuring Sh!t Out - in it's deepest essence.

A real-time reflection on what it looks like to be unraveling the stories you've told yourself about who you are expected to be in order to survive, knowing that life is more than just surviving, and honoring that most of the things that scare the sh!t out of you don't just scare the sh!t out of you because of all that you have to lose -

But also, mostly, more importantly -

because of ALL that you have to gain.

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EMDR Episode 

METAMORPHOSIS: a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you - in COMMUNITY.

Want to learn more about Metamorphosis? All you need to know is here.

and how much of ourselves have we lost deciding that how we are, as we are, is not enough?

how much of our very nature has been stripped away, chipped away, from the gnawing need to be complete?

complete by what measure, by what degree?

by whose decree?

where did we learn that if it wasn’t done perfectly, then it shouldn’t be done at all?

that 0% until we can miraculously have 100% is better than 1% every day?

what freezes within us that causes us to choke at the words we yearn to say and long to express but don’t trust will come out “right” or “perfectly?”

what radical judgements have we internalized?

who told us that we were wrong? why did we believe them?

and why is it now, ourselves, who tell us we are wrong every day we begin something and learn we are bad at first, commit to something then let our second thoughts become our first, pine for freedom yet cut our tongue from speaking the words that free us? 

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in this episode, we get real about the lie that is: "when i'm ready," and how it's really just code for: "when i'm willing to face the fear on the other side of pursuing something very real and very deep and very important to me,"

and i share with you how i'm navigating the exact same thing.

--

Want more? Join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you - in COMMUNITY.

HEAR WHAT MEMBERS ARE SAYING ABOUT METAMORPHOSIS

Inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey and 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey
• Weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A growing library of meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events
• 
  
• 
  

--

LEAVE A COMMENT & let me know WHAT this episode provoked in you, what questions you have (bc tbh I may also be having them), what you want to hear next, and how Figuring Sh!t Out has impacted your life.

Socials:

IG: @byvanessafontana 

TIKTOK: @butterflyfountain

inquiries: [email protected]

The difference between your strongest desire and your deepest desire might just be what you're not seeing.

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Want more? Join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you - in COMMUNITY.

HEAR WHAT MEMBERS ARE SAYING ABOUT METAMORPHOSIS

Inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey and 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey
• Weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A growing library of meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events

LEAVE A COMMENT & let me know WHAT this episode provoked in you, what questions you have (bc tbh I may also be having them), what you want to hear next, and how Figuring Sh!t Out has impacted your life.

Socials:

IG: @byvanessafontana 

TIKTOK: @butterflyfountain

inquiries: [email protected]

for anyone who feels like they're behind:

a path is formed by walking

a path is formed by walking

a path

is formed

by

walking.

--

Want more? Join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you - in COMMUNITY.

HEAR WHAT MEMBERS ARE SAYING ABOUT METAMORPHOSIS

Inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey and 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey
• Weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A growing library of meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events
• 
  

--

LEAVE A COMMENT & let me know WHAT this episode provoked in you, what questions you have (bc tbh I may also be having them), what you want to hear next, and how Figuring Sh!t Out has impacted your life.

Socials:

IG: @byvanessafontana 

TIKTOK: @butterflyfountain

inquiries: [email protected]

"If no one sees your art, it is still revolution. You freed yourself, did you not?" - Jayla John 

In this episode, we talk about how creativity could heal you - if you just let it. 

And how to let it. 

And if you need a little more help, 

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Want more? Join METAMORPHOSIS - a creative nervous-system led sanctuary for women designed to help you move through fear, trust your voice, and express what's inside of you - in COMMUNITY.

HEAR WHAT MEMBERS ARE SAYING ABOUT METAMORPHOSIS

Inside you'll have access to:

• Journey's like the 10 day Creative Awakening & Inner Child Healing Journey and 5 Day Somatic Expression Perfectionism Journey
• Weekly live sessions (Artist’s Hours + Shadow-Workshops) (Also recorded)
• A growing library of meditations, practices, and resources (& Monthly Themes)
• A private community space for connection, expression, and collaboration
• 25% off future retreats / Free NYC events

LEAVE A COMMENT & let me know WHAT this episode provoked in you, what questions you have (bc tbh I may also be having them), what you want to hear next, and how Figuring Sh!t Out has impacted your life.

Socials:

IG: @byvanessafontana 

TIKTOK: @butterflyfountain

inquiries: [email protected]