Figuring Sh!t Out

As the holiday season rolls around, many of us who are on a journey of healing are visited by triggers, past pain, and heavy emotions. 

The first visitor in our internal world is usually Anger. It is best friends with Pride & usually sounds like: 

“Why is is this way? Why did that have to happen? Why couldn’t you have…” + It is often paired with actions towards others that are uninhibited from showing that we still pain.

It is silent, passive, and quite poisonous to our hearts.

Anger & Pride make a bed for Resentment to sleep comfortably in - and all that resentment does is keep us away from the door to our healing. The doorway to our hearts becomes poisoned.

While they are hard, these emotions and triggers are tests and challenges of our willingness to stay present with ourselves and commitment to growth during heavy times. 

Can you peak under the hood of all that anger, pride, resentment, pain — and hold space for what’s underneath it?

Can you consciously decide to continue your journey, in the face of what may have led you on it in the first place?

Can you show up for the inner child you’ve worked so hard to recognize + validate? And can you do it with love? 

I recorded this episode back in June, before The Road Less Traveled kicked off - but as I felt into my experience this past week which always seems to mirror the collective, I felt that some words and reminders on navigating hard family dynamics were needed. 

THIS EPISODE IS AVAILABLE IN VIDEO!

WATCH HERE: https://youtu.be/gy4Be6Bk9mk

In this episode, I cover how Anger + Pride keep us from healing, what self-abandonment looks like & how to spot it, and reminders on what to do when the heart wants to close. 

It’s short & it’s sweet - & if you need more, check out these episodes for further deliberation on these subjects: 

Shadow-Work: 

Episode 21. Shadow-Work Series: Part 1: A Beginners Guide to Inner Child Healing, Forgiveness, & Self-Discovery 

Episode 37. Healing Self-Expression & Actualizing your Dreams Through Your Inner Child - Shadow-Work Series

Episode 39. The Dark Nigh of the Soul

Episode 46. Breaking the Cycle of Generational Trauma & Healing a Wounded Inner Child: Guest Episode with my Sister

Episode 62. Pain is Inevitable, Sufering is a Choice: A step-by-step guide on what to do when sh!t hits the Fan

Episode 1: Inner Child Healing + Shadow-Work 

Healing the Heart: 

Episode 38. Unlocking our Heart’s Potential: Clearing Energetic Blocks & Accessing a Portal to Profound love & inner Alchemy 

JOURNALING PROMPTS + GUIDE FOR THIS EPISODE:

For shadow-work journaling prompts + a guided ritual specific to navigating family dynamics while healing, check out the community for access & consider joining to support my work :)

Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community

IF YOU ARE A FREQUENT LISTENER OF FSO, PLEASE RATE THE SHOW ON YOUR PREFERRED STREAMING PLATFORM + TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS EPISODE <3

IF YOU HAVEN'T YET, CHECK OUT THE SEASON 3 Premier Here!

Socials:

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

EPISODE CHAPTERS: 

0:00: Introduction 

2:15: What is Pride? What is Anger? How does it keep us from healing? 

3:06: Anger is Sadness in a Leather Jacket 

3:54: Reacquainting with the Heart - A Piece Written by Me 

5:55: Acknowledge that Anger has Serves a Purpose in Protecting You (But Know When to Let it Go) 

7:05: Recognizing how We Perpetuate Our Own Pain 

7:30: The Abandonment Wound + It’s Friend: Self-Abandonment

8:32: Triggers, Expectations, & The Very Real Reality of Loving

9:34: Validating & Processing your Inner Grief

10:16 Your Responsibility is You 

11:12 Whatever you Do: Keep Your Heart Open 

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This week, I broke my arm. Yes, I recorded this podcast episode with broken arm. And edited it. And I am typing this now with one hand.

You get the point.

I felt it necessary to interrupt the regularly scheduled programming of the Road Less Traveled to talk about what to do when there are the inevitable bumps in the road. 

How do we respond? 

How do we not spiral? 

How do we.. reverse a spiral (if we may have found ourselves in one)? 

Sh!t happens -- and it's supposed to -- it wouldn't be life if it didn't deeply humble us at times.

But how can we learn to surrender and let life be our teacher, even & especially when things just may be falling apart a little? 

In my one-armed determination to answer this question as life presented me with my own brand new challenge, I created a step-by-step framework for you to walk yourself through to the other side when to the light when you find yourself in some darkness/

It is based on the premise that pain is inevitable - pain is our teacher - pain is a necessary opposite to the sweetest joy. 

But in most instances, suffering is a choice. And it is not something that helps us, nor is it something we have to do. 

CHAPTERS: 

0:00 - 2:30: The Light In The Dark?

2:30 - 10:00: Happening FOR You, Not To You: Forehead Kisses From The Universe (A piece written by me <3) 

10:00 - 16:00: The Law of Polarity & Life's Tests

16:00 - 19:00: Holding Space for Duality. Self-Compassion > Positivity

19:00 - 25:00: The Power of Darkness, Spiraling, & Resilience: Diamonds are Made from Pressure

25:00 - 30:00: Getting Through Hard Sh!t - A Step by Step Framework (&Breaking My Arm) 

30:00 - 34:30: Step 1: The Most Important Question to Ask Yourself

34:30 - 39:00: Step 2: Feel.

39:00- 43:00: Step 3: The Company + Comfort You Keep can Keep You Grounded

43:00- 47:00: Step 4: Learning How to Surrender 

47:00: The Influence of Your Expectations on Your Reality 

F YOU HAVEN'T YET, CHECK OUT THE SEASON 3 Premier Here!

xx

SUPPORT THE SHOW

If you love to listen to FSO, please rate & review the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Consider joining the community for more!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

FOLLOW TO STAY UP TO DATE!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

xx

What is SEASON THREE, THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED?

There is an epidemic in our generation and throughout our society of burnout and hopelessness and a desire for something more. More and more people are deciding to pursue a new path, take a non-conventional journey, to live in alignment with their soul. There is a collective calling for truth and creativity and to live from a heart-centered place.

But how?

Consider Season Three, The Road Less Traveled, as a research project to help us understand that.

I've quit my full time job in Tech, traveled across the world to go to Yoga Teacher Training in Bali, and leaped off a cliff to pursue Figuring Sh!t Out full time as an answer to the calling deep within my heart.

On this season, I'll interview people who've done something similar, I'll share all of the beautiful lessons and tools I've learned, and I will move from the deepest place of knowing that if we will always be Figuring Sh!t Out, we might as well enjoy the process.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We've all heard of Yoga, but what actually is it? And how can you translate ancient knowledge into a modern tool to help you live and lead your life whilst paying homage to its roots? How can it help you break free of what you "think" you should be?

In this episode, we answer those questions.

The first guest of The Road Less Traveled Series is a 22-year old, vibrant yogi from New York with an old soul who transitioned from a touring musician's life to a nomadic and mindful existence.

Etai's story is fueled by a love for sharing wisdom and a deep union with his own uniqueness. His perspective challenges stereotypes around yoga and how to make it an accessible tool that goes beyond physical postures and stands as a pathway to self-expression and authenticity.

Even if you've never practiced yoga before or don't care for it - this conversation is rich with breaking free of societal norms and finding empowerment in embracing change. We weave into and out of the spiritual roots of this tradition and navigate the commercialization of wellness and we discuss what it actually means to us to liberate ourselves from external validation and go forth into our Road Less Traveled.

You can find Etai here.

ig: thugtai

CHAPTERS:

(00:00) - Introduction: The Road Less Traveled

(04:54) - Radiance, Authenticity, Exploring Yoga Beyond the Stereotypes

(8:00) - The Westernization of Yoga

(19:43) - Self-Discovery & Expansion through Somatic Expression

(27:11) - Surrendering to the Call, Trusting the Inner Voice

(40:54) - Brave Love: The Intersection of Fear + Love

(47:25) - New York City vs the World

(55:59) - The Freedom of Letting Go

(01:03:22) - Journey of Embracing Authenticity and Purpose

(01:14:35) - How to Nurture your Inner Growth + Take the Leap

---

IF YOU HAVEN'T YET, CHECK OUT THE SEASON 3 Premier Here!

xx

SUPPORT THE SHOW

If you love to listen to FSO, please rate & review the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Consider joining the community for more!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

FOLLOW TO STAY UP TO DATE!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

xx

What is SEASON THREE, THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED?

There is an epidemic in our generation and throughout our society of burnout and hopelessness and a desire for something more. More and more people are deciding to pursue a new path, take a non-conventional journey, to live in alignment with their soul. There is a collective calling for truth and creativity and to live from a heart-centered place.

But how?

Consider Season Three, The Road Less Traveled, as a research project to help us understand that.

I've quit my full time job in Tech, traveled across the world to go to Yoga Teacher Training in Bali, and leaped off a cliff to pursue Figuring Sh!t Out full time as an answer to the calling deep within my heart.

On this season, I'll interview people who've done something similar, I'll share all of the beautiful lessons and tools I've learned, and I will move from the deepest place of knowing that if we will always be Figuring Sh!t Out, we might as well enjoy the process.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The breath in between facing the fear and taking the leap + all that comes with it is a well of life-lessons. This episode dives into the details of where I’ve been during my hiatus from Figuring Sh!t Out.

This episode covers all that led up to me leaving my job, going to Bali for YTT, and deciding to pursue my podcast full time - stepping foot onto The Road Less Traveled.

Weekly Sunday's are back!!

Video Episode to this Podcast can be found here!

IF YOU HAVEN'T YET, CHECK OUT THE SEASON 3 Premier Here!

CHAPTERS:

- 0:00 - 2:52: welcome to figuring sh!t out

- 2:53: you’re probably wondering how I got here: a recap of FSO’s history

- 8:22: but how do you change everything? why I took a break

- 12:30: how running a marathon changed my mindset on innate expansive capability

- 13:56: how I ACTUALLY took the leap: money, mindset, tools

- 18:50: facing limiting beliefs with gratitude for the uniqueness of being

- 22:05: Bali + Yoga Teacher Training

- 25:44: a year of facing myself: all that I did + let go of to get here

- 30:06: breaking the cycle of generational trauma & rewriting the narrative

- 32:52: growth often looks like uncertainty & confusion

- 34:56: walking upon the road less traveled + what you can expect from S3

SUPPORT THE SHOW

If you love to listen to FSO, please rate & review the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Consider joining the community for more!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

xx

If you liked this episode, you'll like:

I ran a Marathon in Paris

Fear is an Illusion

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

WATCH THE VIDEO HERE!

I've quit my full time job in Tech, traveled across the world to go to Yoga Teacher Training in Bali, and leaped off a cliff to pursue Figuring Sh!t Out full time as an answer to the calling of .. well...... Figuring Sh!t Out

On this season, I'll interview people who've done something similar, I'll share all of the beautiful lessons and tools I've learned, and I will move from the deepest place of knowing that if we will always be Figuring Sh!t Out, we might as well enjoy the process.

Stay tuned for a new FULL LENGTH episode this Sunday on taking the leap.

I love you.

xx

Figuring Sh!t Out is about navigating the chaos of coming of age and adulthood - whether you’re wrestling with a quarter life crisis, chasing elusive dreams, or trying to make sense of the world - it's about knowing that we are always growing up and giving ourselves the grace to do so.

SUPPORT THE SHOW

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Consider joining the community for more!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Some things I am learning:

1. How to normalize the flux of knowing, then not knowing, and realizing that you never really knew anything at all.
2. How to accept the wavering feelings of complete clear-hearted confidence followed by the indescribable uncertainty + fear of "am i doing anything right"
3. The bliss and simplicity of the inevitable rediscovery of our childhood self as the pathway to all that we are and all that we will become.
4. That we heal not to deal with our pain, but to learn how to accept our joy.

+ All the rest in this episode.

CHAPTERS:

0:00 - 4:33: The Non-Linear Journey

4:33: Fear, Uncertainty, Anxiety

7:40: Finding Your Path

10:19: What We Learn in the Hard Sh!t

16:36: Dealing with Toxic People

20:00: Your Deepest Self, The Ever-Unfolding

25:00: Self-Soothing

xx

Support the Show!

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

x

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too!

38 - Unlocking Our Heart's Potential: Clearing Energetic Blocks

20 - It is Happening For You, Not to You: Building Resilience in a World of Change

Interested in more? Join the Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community!

FIGURING SH!T OUT TOGETHER COMMUNITIES

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

About FSO: SEASON TWO TRAILER

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Embracing a Heart-Led Life.

CHAPTERS:

0:00 - 5:00 - Introduction

5:00 - Cultivating Vulnerability + Openness, Being Seen, + The Power of Writing

10:00 - Creating Safe Spaces

13:00 - Healing the Wounded Feminine: Moving from Love

20:00 - Masculine & Feminine Energies - Spiritual Significance Differentiated from Gender

27:00 - Internalized Misogyny, Reawakening the Life Force, Embracing the Heart-Led Life

33:00 - Love & Loving, Platonic Love, What Blocks us from Love

48:00 - Breakups, Change, Surrendering to Community during Tower Moments

x

Follow Sian <3

Her Podcast: Apricity

IG: @siancamile

x

Support the Show!

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Interested in more? Join the Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community!

FIGURING SH!T OUT TOGETHER COMMUNITIES

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

About FSO: SEASON TWO TRAILER

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too!

53 - The Art of Letting Go

42 - Let Yourself Bloom!

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Today's episode is a conversation with a girl after my own heart, Sian Camile.

Sian is a beautiful, soulful woman who truly leads with love and creates spaces for creativity to flourish.

Her presence is comforting and connected & the wisdom of her insights feel like a soothing balm for the soul.

In this episode, we talk about

• The Divine Energies: Masculine & Feminine (+ How they're Differentiated from Gender)
• Symptoms of The Wounded Feminine
• Healing the Heart + Moving from Love
• Balancing the Dualities: Light + Dark
• Nuances of Womanhood, Dating, and Breakups
• How Sian curates and creates community for other people through her Writing Workshops
• Her perspective on vulnerability as a superpower and how breaking the barrier to allowing oneself to be seen is the key to bonding + relational connectivity with others
• Conscious living in your 20's: Finding Your Community

Whether it's the similarities we share in both being writers, podcast hosts, or having Water, Air, and Earth in our big three (Sian: Cap Sun, Gemini Rising, Cancer Moon / Me: Pisces Sun, Virgo Rising, Aquarius Moon), this episode is an embodiment of Sian & I's kindred spirits.

Enjoy <3

xx

V

CHAPTERS:

0:00 - 13:20: Introduction, The Power of Safe Spaces, Cultivating Vulnerability & Openness

13:20: Masculine & Feminine Energies: The Divine Trio + Spiritual Significance

16:00: The Wounded Feminine: Symptoms

19:00: The Sacred Feminine + Healthy Masculine: Balancing Opposing Energies

22:00: Internalized Misogyny, Reawakening our Life Force, Embracing the Heart-Led Life

28:00: Love & Loving - Platonic Love, Familial Love, + What Blocks us from Love

33:00: Birth, Death, Rebirth: Surrendering to Love & Loss + Accepting our Emotions

40:00: Breakups, Change, & The Healing Power of Friendship

47:00: Coping with the Unknown

x

Follow Sian <3

Her Podcast: Apricity

IG: @siancamile

x

Support the Show!

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Interested in more? Join the Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community!

FIGURING SH!T OUT TOGETHER COMMUNITIES

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

About FSO: SEASON TWO TRAILER

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too!

53 - The Art of Letting Go

42 - Let Yourself Bloom!

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Productivity that feels nourishing is rare these days. When quantity out-rules quality, we feel burnt out by the pressure to produce. The tendency to put things off, look to our left and see something "better," and silently stay in our chamber of consumption, rather than creation is far too pervasive in today's age.

So, how do we actually equip ourselves to separate what we want to do from what we "have" to do, create from a place of empowerment, and share our magic with the world? How do we resist the hustle-culture that leads to burnout while also being honest with ourselves about if we're showing up in a way that aligns with our highest self?

On this episode, we take a look at the psychology of perfectionism and discuss ways to overcome the subconscious beliefs and patterns that keep us frozen. Through actionable steps and a mindset shift, we can slowly take aligned action in the every day to set our own standard for success, and silence the inner critic.

(A very fun exercise is included to identify this voice + overcome it!!)

CHAPTERS:

0:00 - 5:35 - Introduction & Episode overview 

5:35: The (Unholy) Trinity: Perfectionism, Self-Sabotage, & Procrastination

7:45: Personifying our Limiting Beliefs (Ft. Bob the Blob!!)

9:47: Shadow-Work + Taking Your Power Back - Why do we Distract Ourselves?

11:00: Admitting what you WANT (What if you don't know what you want?) + Tactics to Overcome our Unproductive Habits

12:30: The KEY to reclaiming your power over your time, attention, focus (while avoiding burnout)

18:10: Get bored of your Bullsh!t!! (Lovingly <3) Practices for Self-Love & Self Discipline

Join the Community to access the Shadow-Work Guidebook created with this episode <3

Includes a Step-by-Step guide to Transmute Past Perfectionistic Tendencies with Inner Child Healing w/ Meditation & Journal Prompts!

xx

Support the Show!

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Interested in more? Join the Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

FIGURING SH!T OUT TOGETHER COMMUNITIES

YOU ARE YOUR OWN HERO | E-BOOK & GUIDE BY ME <3 (free w/ community access!!) 

MAILING LIST: FSO Website

FREE DOWNLOADABLE GUIDEBOOK ON INTUITION VS ANXIETY

SEASON TWO TRAILER

If you liked this episode, you'll like these too!

18 - Burnout, Toxic Productivity, & Radical Acceptance

25 - Self Love & Self Discipline - Learning to Listen to your Intuitive Cycles of Rest & Action

Book Recommendation: Atomic Habits, James Clear

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Is it possible.. that many of our problems could be solved and doors of opportunity could open up if we just --- got out of our heads, into our bodies, and .. hit the swing-set? danced it out? allowed ourselves to BE fully in the sweet joys of life more often?

The most profound lessons that lead to a fulfilling life are usually what we knew from our youngest ages.

Let's talk about it.

CHAPTERS:

0:00-6:57 - The Importance of Play, Fun, & Reprograming The Little Voice in Our Head

6:57: Learning to Be in Our Bodies: Improv + Self-Expression

14:56: A Course in Joyful Living: The Artist’s Way - The Book that Changed my Life

20:54: Following Your Impulses

23:05: We have Free Will!! (& An ANNOUNCEMENT on How I'm Using Mine!!!!)

27:54: Life is Made up of Little Moments, What Luxury ACTUALLY is

29:48: ENERGY IS CURRENCY.

34:46: What About When "Having Fun" Is Impossible?

36:31: HAVE YOU LAUGHED TODAY?

Inspirations & Resources:

@greenadyofbrooklyn

The Artists Way

Support the Show!

If you love to listen to FSO, rate the podcast on your preferred streaming platform, let me know your thoughts on this episode, and follow the socials to stay up to date!

Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Interested in more? Join the Figuring Sh!t Out Together Community!

The Figuring Sh!t Out Together community provides access to a connected space that deepens your navigation of healing, evolving, becoming. To receive some guided journey's alongside episodes, connection to the FSO Together community + Vanessa, and bonus content <3

FIGURING SH!T OUT TOGETHER COMMUNITIES

YOU ARE YOUR OWN HERO | E-BOOK & GUIDE BY ME <3 (free w/ community access!!) 

MAILING LIST: FSO Website

FREE DOWNLOADABLE GUIDEBOOK ON INTUITION VS ANXIETY

SEASON TWO TRAILER

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too!

40 - Wake Up! Your Life is Meant to Be Lived!

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy