Figuring Sh!t Out

This episode is a love-letter to aliveness, and gives you sacred permission to be soft, silly, and slow.

It asks: 

What if today, you let yourself believe it was all magic? 

What if joy wasn't something to earn — but something to practice? 

This is your invitation to reject the homogenization of happiness, to romance the ordinary by becoming alive to our senses, and to let bliss be your rebellion - because it takes discipline to be in it.

If you've been caught up in the trap of productivity, control, have forgotten that you are a human on a floating rock and we're ALL just figuring sh!t out, this episode is for you — and it is a sacred portal to come home to wonder. 

Inside the episode: 

• Why softness and joy are powerful and sacred practices (not weaknesses) that have been practiced for centuries in ritual
• How your inner child is your portal to your higher self
• The myth of "coolness" and how it keeps us disconnected
• My personal rituals and list of romanticizing the every day 
• The feminine void, divine energy, and what it means to create from nothingness without an agenda
• Why play is a spiritual portal and how to reclaim it as an adult 
• What to do when joy feels scary or guilt-inducing

Romanticizing your life is not delusional, it is devotional. 

Play, Art, & Joy are not frivolous - they are sacred. 

So sit back , soften your edges, make a cup of tea — and come home.

x

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Stan-Store (With Workshop Playbacks + Resources for Purchase being added as we speak!)

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CHAPTERS:

0:00-6:00: Being Silly is Sacred - Softness Isn't Weakness

6:00-8:30: The Myth of Maturity: Get Over Yourself. Being Cool is a Cage

8:30-11:50 Falling in Love with the Process 

11:50-14:00: The Power of Joy, Dance, & Community as Sacred Ritual

14:00-18:30: Shedding the Guilt of Happiness, Being in Bliss is Being in Divine Service

18:30-20:00: Inner Child is the Gateway to the Higher Self 

20:00-28:00: The Little Ways I Romanticize My Life 

28:00-32:00: Joy is a Great Business Strategy 

32:00-36:00: De-Influencing Minimalism & Curating a Life that Feels like Magic Adornment

36:00-40:00: The Feminine Void, The Sacred Unknown, The Dance of Energies 

40:00-47:00: The First Step to Manifestation & What Real Luxury Is 

47:00-48:00: Opportunity!

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Trauma is not what happens to us - it is what happens inside of us as a result of what happens to us.

Which is why healing comes from the inside out -- through modalities that often get us out of the thinking mind and into the body.

We've all heard it: The Body Keeps the Score. But what does that mean?

In this episode, I sit down with Dana Carretta-Stein — a certified EMDR therapist and trauma-informed care expert whose work has informed a community of over 100,000— to unravel how EMDR Therapy actually works. Not just as a therapy, but as a powerful pathway for healing the past and reclaiming the present.

We unpack what EMDR is and why it works, who it’s for, and why talk therapy isn’t always enough. We explore the overlap between ADHD and trauma, the importance of an attuned therapist, the phases of EMDR, and what healing really looks like when you’re finally ready to face the past.

I also share my personal journey with EMDR — from mother wound work to reprocessing deep-rooted patterns I didn’t even know were trauma responses.

This conversation is packed with insight, validation, and gentle encouragement for anyone navigating their own healing.

For anyone who feels stuck, numb, and is carrying the weight of what hasn't been held yet -- may this conversation be a guiding light for you.

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DANA'S LINKS:

Dana's Website

Free EMDR Resources

Dana's IG

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Stay Connected!

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Stan-Store (With Workshop Playbacks + Resources for Purchase being added as we speak!)

CHAPTERS:

0:00-6:30: Introduction

6:30-9:00: What does Healing Mean to You?

9:00-14:00: Trauma is Not an Event, It's An Experience

14:00-18:00: The overlap between ADHD & Trauma. Rejection Sensitivity

18:00-26:00: How is Talk Therapy Different than EMDR? Feeling & Processing vs "Out-thinking" or Intellectualizing

26:00-40:00: My journey with EMDR, The Mother Wound, Attachment Trauma

40:00-46:00: How do You know You're "Done" with EMDR?

46:00-49:00: The Codependent Therapist/Patient Relationship & Importance of Attunement

49:00-53:00: "Pre-Requisites for EMDR," Fear around Repressed Memories Resurfacing

53:00-59:00: Results: What is the Biggest Change You've Seen in Someone through EMDR

59:00-1:07: Finding the Right Therapist, Insurance, & Investment in your Healing

1:07-1:09: EMDR & Joe Dispenza Overlap

1:09-1:15: Why EMDR? & Who is the Therapists' Therapist?

1:15-1:20: Road Less Traveled & Figuring Sh!t Out Advice

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GLOSSARY:

DBT: Dialectal Behavioral Therapy / CBT: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - commonly used modalities of Talk Therapy

EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing 

IFS: Internal Family Systems / Parts Work

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this episode, I talk about the dreaded yet silent fear many of us have: being seen and perceived. Reflecting on two years of sharing my heart & soul with the world, I outline the five most important things you need to know in beginning to listen to what your heart calls you to.

We discuss the identify shifts that happen when you start showing up authentically and what I’ve learned about living more truthfully. We touch on guilt, money, intuition, and the chaos that comes with committing to a vision that only you can see.

On the Two Year Anniversary episode of FSO, we sit with what it really means to do the thing you know you need to do and let your truth lead: even when it’s messy, even when it’s uncomfortable, even when you want to hide and have spent your whole life doing so.

Two years ago, when I dropped this podcast - I did so out of just a little inkling of desire. I was 23, working full time in Tech, knowing if I didn't do something with my creative energy, I would go insane.

And two years later, here I am: listening to this authentic calling has become my full time job, I've made a deep commitment to honoring a life in pursuit of the expressive truth -- and I'm here to tell the tales along the way.

If you’re navigating the resistance of taking up the space your heart calls you to take up, waiting to be ready to create instead of consume, wondering how to begin, or just love Figuring Sh!t Out (thank you, I love YOU!!!!) -- this episode is for you.

-

Substack Article

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Stay Connected!

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MY NEWSLETTER (scroll to the end of the page to join!)

Stan-Store (With Workshop Playbacks + Resources for Purchase being added as we speak!)

CHAPTERS:

0:00-6:00: 2 years of FSO: what happens when you let your authentic truth lead / getting in touch with the divinity of who you are 

6:00-8:33: transformation lives in the breaking point. integration > information; action > learning

8:33-12:00: (you're probably wondering how I got here) 

12:00-15:00 strategy has no place in your dreams 

15:00-24:00: how a life of silence led me to talking for a living 

24:00-26:00: living guiltlessly in the place of authenticity & how to stop making excuses for yourself

26:00-29:00: money transparency & taking risks 

29:00-40:00: The Five Things

40:00-47:00: you can't even imagine how good it gets 

47:00-53:00: you are a multidimensional being not to be defined

53:00-58:00: commitment

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Surrender is soft, sweet, – and so quiet, you’d almost miss it. And I think that is why we do. 

What is your relationship with the need to know? 

What is your dialogue with desire? 

What gnaws at the insides of your brain and creates compulsions of “must do’s” and “have to”? 

What lie led you to believe that those traits serve you more than they hurt you? 

Herein lies the entrypoint to your darkest shadow and your deepest peace. 

Can you sit in the stillness long enough to uncover magic? 

As we sit in the space between winter and spring, where windchill still whispers and the sun overcomes it’s fear of being seen, we see nature mimic this sentiment:

To sit in the space of something yearning to sprout – Requires patience, hope, and trust. 

We could plop ourselves in front of the budding tulips and urge them to come out of the ground. 

We could harness all of our energy and scream at the daffodils to make them sing.

But no amount of force will stop the natural becoming of what has been sewn into the surface of this life. 

When you’ve gripped so tightly onto control that the forces of nature just want to teach you your lesson, a catalyst occurs.  

Life bites you back with a distinct surprise, a death, a destruction.  

You are shown that – you can sure as hell try, but you won’t ever really know or guarantee or be certain of a thing. 

In surrender, there is a silent trust, a connected breath, a subtle heart-beat that begins to get louder with attention and intention. 

In this breath, you sink deeper into the now and realize this is the place where all of the magic happens.

Can you repeat: "I love you where you are and I love you where you're going?" as you stare back at yourself in the mirror ---

and mean it?

x

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+ JOIN THE Community! For Bonus Meditations, Episodes, & Discounted/Free Access to Workshops

Stan-Store (With Workshop Playbacks + Resources for Purchase being added as we speak!)

CHAPTERS:

0:00-4:00: to pursue growth out of love, not escape is where true transformation is

4:00-6:30: the quiet space between two choices: life works with us or against us

6:30-15:00: I love you where you are & I love you where you're going, Growth is About Allowing

15:00-19:00: Releasing the clenched hand and allowing discovery & receptivity

20:00-24:00: the art of surrender - confronting our need to control

24:00-28:00: get out of your own way. the calling wouldn't be in your heart if it wasn't meant for you

28:00-34:00: You were never in the Driver's Seat - Allowing Divinity In

34:00-38:00: The Evidence of Fate's Hand & miraculous simplicity

38:00-43:00: Unwavering Trust & Faith is an Illusion, Most times it is Blind

43:00-46:00: You're literally on a floating rock

46:00-48:00: Come Back Home.

48:00: Announcement!!

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Substack (Soft Focus)

Youtube Video to this Episode

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EFT tapping: an incredible, simple way to reprogram your subconscious and clear channels of fear. So incredible and so simple, you may just overlook it because.. how can tapping on your face really do that?

Today, I’m sitting down with Brad Yates, better known as Tap with Brad, who teaches tapping to an audience of 300,000 subscribers. With over 50 million views across his videos, Brad's guidance is instrumental in helping others dissolve fear and tap into their potential.

Brad has spent years helping people use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to dissolve subconscious resistance and shift into alignment.

In this episode, we talk about:

:The science behind EFT & how it works on a subconscious level

:How stress and old programming silently block us from what we want

:Why the body holds onto past experiences,

:How tapping can physically rewire your brain for expansion and clear limiting beliefs

If you’ve ever been curious about EFT, this is your 101 crash course.

** TAPPING SESSION @ THE END (FOLLOW ALONG ON YOUTUBE)

Tap with Brad (Youtube)

Tapping 101

Tap to have an Amazing Day

Self-Forgiveness Tapping

Brad's Instagram

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Substack

CHAPTERS:

0:00-5:55: How I discovered EFT & WTF is it

5:55-8:30: How does a grown man find himself tapping on his face for a living? Who is Brad Yates?

8:30-10:55: How EFT Breaks up Subconscious Blocks, Health Benefits of EFT

10:55-15:00: The Importance of Body-Based & Somatic Therapies (EFT vs EMDR)

15:00-18:00: Listening to that Little Voice

18:00-20:10: The Power of Taking Full Responsibility for Our Own Well-Being

20:10-25:00: Energy Hygiene, Navigating Resistance, No Such thing as Lazy

25:00-30:45: Raising your Baseline of Well-Being

30:45-42:00: Navigating Relationships & Growth, The Trap of Projecting our Beliefs & Healing onto Others

42:00: LIVE Tapping session with Brad

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Time is an illusion, yet a powerful tool.

It is the quickest way to magic or stagnancy, depending on how we use it.

This episode explores how we use our time through the portal of words, thoughts, and actions to create the life we want or perpetuate the life we don't.

It explores how we can embrace timing, reframe and shift our perspective of time, and unlock possibilities through our beliefs.

May it inspire you to take a big, loving look around and decide:

"Actually, life is beautiful. And I do have time."

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SPRING SOLSTICE WORKSHOP ON OVERCOMING LIMITS: Tix Here 3/20 6-8 PM ET

Discounted / Free Access (Depending on your Tier) in the Community

Free Grounding & Energy Cleansing Meditation in the FSO Together community <3

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Substack

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too! 

32 - Career Confusion & Existential Crises: Advice for Finding Your Path & Enjoying the Journey Along the Way

45 - I ran a Marathon in Paris & Had a Second Spiritual Awakening

CHAPTERS:

0:00-5:00: You Are Right on Time + My Realizations turning 25

5:00-9:19: The Perspective of Time changes our Perception of Time 

9:19-12:30: You are Right on Time if you Decide you are Right on Time 

12:30-21:41: The Mental Manifests into the Physical: My Journey with Freeze State

21:41-25:18: Words are Spells and We Create Our Reality

25:18-29:03: Understanding the Subconscious

29:03-37:46: It's Not About the How & The Impossible is Possible

37:46-40:44: Your Peace is Your Problem

40:44-46:07: Time can be Subjective + Life Can Be Easier than we Make It

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Allow this episode to inspire a shift in your energy. 

Allow it to remind you that life is meant to be lived. That joy is a choice. That ease is only as simple as we make it. That thinking about your feelings or journaling about them is not the same as feeling them. That the tools for change in any moment are inside of the gift of your presence. 

This episode is for my fellow thought daughters, the introspective ones who love to see into their own psyche and pick apart the many caverns of patterns and shed light on their shadow, for those of us who are always looking for the lesson, trying to learn from life, who are committed to being a student of it. 

I know that you have taken the beautiful responsibility for your life, but have you remembered to also… live it?

If you feel like you've been stuck in the cycle of overanalyzing your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and trying to "figure your way out" of wherever you may have found yourself, if you have been on a constant hamster-wheel of striving towards who you want to be and are finding little fulfillment or joy in the process, if you've been doing the inner work but feeling like you're making no progress — this episode is for you. 

It is a reminder of the power of your subtle energy and is filled with with inspiration from my own discovery with this subject, practices for you to reinstate ease into your life, and a discussion about what choosing joy actually means and how to push through the resistance that will inevitably come when you decide that joy is your priority. 

You are not a self-help project & healing is not your purpose — living your life and experiencing it: is.

x

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Substack

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too! 

47 - Stop Playing it Small & Start Flirting with Life

Resources for this Episode: 

Somatic Shaking Practice + Dance Movement Therapy

Somatic Meditation for Emotional Release

CHAPTERS:

0:00-5:30: the one who asks is the one who receives - you are not a self-help project.

5:30-9:30: having corporate america flashbacks in a community sauna?? what I learned

9:30-10:50: getting lost in being a student of life (vs a liver of life)

10:50-12:30: the influence of your inner teenager + alchemizing in acceptance

12:30-16:22: the path of least resistance + finding ease 

16:22-20:02: intellectualizing & overanalyzing to reinstating ease: subtle energy shifts

20:02-24:00: it takes discipline to be in bliss: joy must be more important to you than fitting in

24:00-27:15: time as a portal, being in communion with others 

27:15-29:00 code switching & energy shifting 

29:00-33:29: co-creation, trust with the divine, opening yourself 

33:29-34:27: short practice for cultivating a shift 

34:27-38:02: there is more to life than figuring sh!t out (contrary to what you may believe)

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Today, I turn 25.

And on the quarter of a century anniversary of being brought into this world, I realize that to look at aging as a gift or a grievance defines the course and direction of most of our lives.

It is a choice made every single day - in how we decide to live, breathe, and be.

This episode is about growing up. And also, deciding that we don't have to let that mean anything more than we make it.

If you feel you've been jostled by the confusion of coming of age, trying to figure sh!t out but not sure quite how -- well, this episode is for you.

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Substack

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one too! 

40 - Wake Up! Your Life is Meant to be Lived

EPISODE CHAPTERS: 

0:00-6:10: Navigating Confusion & Quarter Life Crises  

6:10 - 11:40: Turning 25 & The Portal of Choices

11:40-15:40: Calm Down - You Have Time.

15:40-17:00: You Can Start Over Anytime You Want

17:00-22:00: The Fig Tree of Choices & What we Can Learn from Sylvia Plath

22:00-25:00: Life is a Gift: Release the Expectations of it Needing to be Anything Else

25:00-27:00: Death is our Greatest Teacher & Life Itself is Your Career

27:00-30:00: We’re Just Five Year Old Adults: Life as a A Gift or Grievance

30:00-32:00: A Quarter Life Awakening: Becoming Alive to your Aliveness

32:00-36:00: There is only Going Forward. Every Day is Special.

36:00-38:00: Announcements & Thank You!!!!

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True transformation happens when the discomfort of staying the same becomes more unbearable than the discomfort of change. 

And change? Transformation? Getting all you dream about? Having the courage TO dream at all? 

It's not all rainbows. It is certainly uncomfortable.

But it is at once ----

Expansive. Heart-opening. Boundless. Miraculous. 

Remember: life is duality. You cannot have the expansion without the contraction. 

Healing your limits, learning your power, breaking cycles — it is what you were put on this earth to do. 

When you begin to transform, it is not a matter of if challenges will come - but how well you can receive them as lessons and opportunities to expand into when they do.

So how do we actually use the energetic laws of the universe and our cognitive bias to prove our assumptions right -- to our advantage?

This week, we talk about art of leveling up, playing the game of life, seeing the tests in the challenges, and stepping into higher timelines with practices and frameworks that I outline here.

This episode breaks down what it means to look at life as an energetic playing field that we are always taking part in and how to understand the mechanics of the law of assumption so that you can see how it is already ruling your life and use your power to wield it's influence back in your favor.

Assumption. Contraction. Expansion. Trust: The magic is in the motion. The only thing stopping you —

Is you. 

x

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Personal Instagram: @222vgf

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Substack

EPISODE RESOURCES 

Overcoming Limiting Beliefs:

• Episode 66: Is it a Problem or a Pattern? Shifting Subconscious Programming, Becoming Aware, Breaking out of Limiting Beliefs
• Episode 24: A Guide to: Identifying Limiting Beliefs, Breaking Patterns, & Creating a new Self-Concept
• Episode 48: Running From What you Don't Want vs Going Towards Wha You Do: The Magic Key to Creation

Episodes on Manifestation + The Law of Attraction 

• Episode 5: Part 1: Living in Alignment, Surrendering, & Trusting Your Intuition 
• Episode 6: Part 2: Romanticizing your Life, Self-Fulfilling Prophecies, & Gratitude into Luckiness
• Episode 47: Stop Playing it Small & Start Flirting with Life 

MEDITATIONS & Visualizations: 

• Free Grounding & Energy Cleansing Meditation in the FSO Together community!! 
• Joe Dispenza Meditation (Audible) 
• Book: "Becoming Supernatural" 

Other Meditations I love for Visualization!

• Visualization Meditation 1 (Youtube) 
• Visualization Mediation 2 (Youtube) 

EPISODE CHAPTERS: 

0:00-5:40: Episode Overview & Updates <3

5:40-10:00: The Power of the Law of Assumption

10:00-19:00: The Moment of Reckoning: The Contractions before the Expansions

19:00-22:00: The Game of Life: Challenges are Checkpoints

25:00-31:00: Why "Manifestation" Hasn't Worked for You & How to get the Most out of Visualization Practices

31:00-38:00: Aligning Yourself Vibrationally, Connecting to Higher Timelines, The Butterfly Effect 

38:00-43:00: Forget the How! What do you WANT? Trust, Surrender, Rejection is Redirection 

43:00-46:00: Side Quests (&When they Turn into Main Quests) 

46:00-50:00: Practices for Receptivity, Softening the Space of Your Heart, Asking for More > Settling for Less

50:00-52:00: ANNOUNCEMENT!! (Advice Sessions for FSO Together!!!) 

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You accept the love you believe you deserve. And if you know that you deserve more than you've gotten in romantic relationships but you haven't been able to receive it — this episode is for you. 

If you've been around the block getting your heart broken or fearing to let it be loved or found yourself in a thousand different ruts dating people who just don't feel right for you — this episode is a foundation for navigating that. 

If there is part of you that feels or has felt incomplete without a romantic relationship, that feels like you're waiting around to find the person you're meant to be with, that longs for wholeness in the union of you and another — I have one piece of advice for you that rings throughout this episode: 

Stop looking. Stop searching. And realize that you are already whole on your own. Everything you're looking for is inside of you - including the ingredients it takes to attract that healthy union in your life. 

Center YOU. Fall so deeply in love with you and your life, that anyone who opens the door to enter it must meet a standard you've set with the love you give yourself in order to walk in. 

Set the standard for how you want to be treated with how you treat yourself. 

Become so in love with your hobbies, your friendships, your pursuit of growth - that anyone who enters the wholeness of your life will only compliment it and add value to the bounty you've already created. 

This episode is about expanding the capacity for what we believe we deserve through the nurturing of a relationship with ourselves. 

We dive deep into the psychology of romantic relationships and what it takes to attract a healthy partnership into our lives, how to keep it, and why our nervous system gets triggered in romantic relationships and I share my story on figuring this sh!t out over the last couple of years.

A meditation aligned with this episode is available in the community, which you can join here xx 

Meditation for Self-Love, Compassion, & Acceptance - with Journaling Prompts

If you liked this episode, you'll like these too: 

Episode 34: Confidence, Personal Power, & Magnetic Energy - Rising Above Judgement & People Pleasing 

Episode 24: A Guide to: Identifying Limiting Beliefs, Breaking Patterns, & Creating a New Self-Concept

Episode 4: Access to You is a Privilege - Navigating All Types of Love & Relationships

Join the Community for Free access all FSO Guidebooks, Discounted/Free access to all workshops, monthly guided meditations, bonus content, + community group chat connection! 

Free Grounding & Energy Cleansing Meditation on my Patreon :) 

x

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Podcast Instagram: @figuringshiiitout

Personal Instagram: @222vgf

TikTok: butterflyfountain

Substack

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CHAPTERS: 

0:00-5:16: Your Relationship with Yourself Determines What You Accept in a Romantic Relationship

5:16-8:00: Decentering Romantic Love & Centering Yourself: Dating Yourself

8:00-9:30: Why We Let Some Relationships Keep us Small 

9:30-10:30: Building a Relationship with Yourself will Always Lead to More Love in Your Life

10:30-13:04: Navigating Heartbreak & Healing

13:04-15:00: Understanding Attachment Styles 

15:00-17:30: Anxious Attachment & Protest Behavior

17:30-18:56: Avoidant Attachment

18:56-22:22: Secure Attachment & The Dynamics of a Healthy Relationship

 22:22- 25:16: Self-Awareness in Love 

25:16- 27:30: The Trap of Dating Apps & Searching for Love

27:30-30:00: Self-Respect > Validation: Letting People Audition to be in Your Life

30:00-32:00: Mistaking Infatuation for Love & Situationships

32:00- 34:00: The Importance of Wholeness in a Relationship

34:00-36:09: Building False Senses of Intimacy has to GO

36:09-38:30: The Power of Platonic, Familial, & Self Love

38:30-40:00: Being Picky, Non-Negotiables, & Not Being Afraid to Walk Away

40:00- 43:00: Healing IN a Relationship & Growing with a Partner, Partnership + Personal Growth 

43:00-46:42: The Right Relationship Gives you Freedom 

46:42-49:38: Challenging Negative Beliefs about Love & Relationships

49:38-57:40: Attracting Positive & Healthy Relationships

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