Your brain can find danger in a perfectly normal Tuesday and then call it “being responsible.” That’s the trap we’re unpacking today: the negativity bias that keeps your mind scanning for threats, even when you’re safe, steady, and everything is basically fine. When calm feels weird or suspicious, it’s not proof you’re missing something. It’s often just a protective system trying to do its job a little too well.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

A “normal” mom can still be the source of your biggest emotional drain and that can be the hardest truth to admit. I sit down with deputy editor and first time author Ashley Oerman to talk about the unnamed, often secret struggle of having a mother relationship that doesn’t feel safe, nurturing, or steady, even if there’s no headline level trauma. Ashley shares the personal moments that cracked things open for her, from anxiety in high-stakes meetings to crying after perfectly ordinary phone calls, and why those reactions can be your nervous system waving a flag.

We get practical about what actually helps: how to spot when a caregiver dynamic is leaking into your work, confidence, and relationships; why “white knuckling” and people pleasing keep you stuck; and how to set boundaries that protect your peace without turning your parent into a cartoon villain. Ashley explains why low contact isn’t punishment, what real change would need to look like for reconnection, and how emotional immaturity can make accountability feel impossible for some parents.

The biggest unlock is grief. Not just sadness, but an ongoing kind of loss that resurfaces again and again when the parent is still alive, and the world keeps showing you the mother you wished you had. Ashley breaks down the dual process model of grief, a research-backed way to move between feeling the loss and living your life so you can accept reality without letting it drive the car. If you’ve ever thought, “Nothing is that bad, so why do I feel this way?” this conversation puts language to it and offers a way forward. 

Be sure to grab a copy of her book, Motherf*cked: How to Stop Your Mother's Toxic Drama from Ruining Your Life

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

“Nothing’s gone wrong. You just don’t like it.” That’s the tiny sentence that can drain the drama out of your day and give you your energy back. When we dislike something, we often jump straight to: this shouldn’t be happening, something is broken, someone wronged me, I made a mistake. I share a cleaner, calmer alternative that helps you stop fighting reality and start listening to what your preferences are actually telling you.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

You don’t have to wait for proof to feel confident. One of the most powerful mindset shifts I’ve learned is almost unfairly simple: you can decide you’re good at something. That single decision changes the energy you bring into a room, the risks you’ll take, and the speed at which you learn, because you stop treating every wobble like a warning sign and start treating it like part of the process.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

Sometimes the hardest part of moving on isn’t the goodbye, it’s the story we feel forced to tell afterward. If you’ve ever ended a relationship and caught yourself turning the other person into “the problem” just so it hurts less, we’re talking about a gentler option: letting someone go without making them wrong.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

Your standards are already running your life, whether you’ve named them or not. If you keep finding yourself stuck with the same draining dynamics, the same disappointment, or the same low-level frustration, there’s a good chance you’re not dealing with a “problem” so much as a pattern you’ve quietly normalised. I unpack a simple truth that can change everything: what you tolerate repeats. 

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

Do you actually want advice or do you just want permission? That one question exposes a sneaky habit most of us have: we reach out for “guidance” when what we really want is someone to approve the decision we’ve already made in our head. And when we don’t get the answer we wanted, we feel thrown off, even though nothing changed except the level of outside validation we got back.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

You can drown in options, spreadsheets, and other people’s opinions and still not feel clear. We lean on one sharp, calming decision-making question that cuts through the noise: Which option will minimise future regret? When you use that filter, even the biggest life choices start to feel more honest and more doable, because you’re answering to the only person who will live with the results: future you.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

You can spend years trying to “fix” yourself, or you can ask a better question: what if nothing about you is random? We’re talking about the quiet habit of rejecting parts of ourselves, our looks, our quirks, our sensitivity, the parts that feel awkward or “too much,” and how that self rejection steals confidence and ease. Then we flip the frame by looking at nature, where everything is built with a purpose and nothing wastes energy arguing with what it is. 

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.

You can spend years trying to be understood, or you can take your power back in a single choice: letting people be wrong about you. That idea sounds almost too simple, but once it lands, it changes how you move through your day. If you have a creative life that looks “unconventional” to family, if you keep explaining yourself to siblings, coworkers, or friends, or if you feel a low-grade heaviness from chasing approval, this conversation is a reset.

And, if you want more access to me, my coaching, and live monthly calls, I want to invite you to join us inside Self Coaching Society  with this limited time, exclusive offer just for my very special podcast listeners.

 Get your first month for just $1, then only $29/month after that! (you can cancel anytime). 

Join us here: https://selfcoachingsociety.com/pod/

Simple as that! I can't wait to welcome you inside!

If you'd love to watch the video version of our interviews, be sure to subscribe to the podcast's YouTube channel here.