Mary's Cup of Tea: the Self Love Podcast for Women

By Mary JelkovskySociety & Culture Health & Fitness Mental Health Education Self-Improvement Relationships

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Mary's Cup of Tea: the Self Love Podcast for Women episodes

May 21, 2020 #18: Beauty Sickness with Dr. Renee Engeln
Okay I am seriously freaking out (in a good way) about this episode because you know that book I keep recommending to you called “Beauty Sick”??? Well, the author of that very book is joining us today on the podcast to talk about beauty sickness- what it is and how we can combat it. Our culture is OBSESSED with appearance, more particularly, women’s appearance. So many of us feel like we are not good enough unless we look a certain way, whether that be a certain weight, body size/shape, or simply our makeup and outfit choices. It’s EXHAUSTING to constantly feel like that. Dr. Renee teaches us how we can stop being so focused on our appearance so that we can finally live free.

Renee Engeln is a psychology professor and director of the “Body and Media Lab” at
Northwestern University. Her research and writing focus on issues surrounding women’s body images, with an emphasis on how cultural forces shape the relationship women have with their bodies. Her work has appeared in numerous academic journals and at academic conferences. She is regularly interviewed by media outlets, including the New York Times, Chicago Tribune, The Atlantic, Vox, and HuffPost. Her TEDx talk has garnered over half a million views.

Get Dr. Renee’s book! It’s called Beauty Sick and it has CHANGED. MY. LIFE.

You can also find her on Instagram as @beauty_sick and her research can be found at bodyandmedia.com

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1 hr 6 min
May 14, 2020 #17: The Science of Food Freedom with Jessi Jean
In this episode, Mary is joined by her dear friend Jessi (@jessijeannn on Instagram) who talks about food freedom, intuitive eating, and healing from body-image struggles. Jessi’s story starts in high school when like many young women, she started restrictive dieting. She went on to compete in bikini fitness competitions thinking that it would make her have more “self-control” around food, but it only made it worse. The exhaustion of dieting, over exercising, and depriving her body nearly killed her.

After being on a healing journey of 10 years, Jessi became a Certified Eating Psychology coach and created the Food Freedom Online Program which helps women heal their relationship with food and their body.

In this podcast, Jessi talks about her daily morning routine which has helped her and hundreds of women stop binge eating by reprogramming the neural pathways in their brain and forming new habits around eating. She also gives tactical advice for conquering binge eating, eating intuitively, and building positive body-image.

Get more info on Jessi’s program here: https://www.conquerbingeeating.com/ffm
And listen to her podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-dear-body-podcast/id1460137502
You can also find her on IG here: https://www.instagram.com/jessijeannn/

Tag us on Instagram and let us know you’re listening! @jessijeannn and @maryscupofteaa

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57 min
May 07, 2020 #16: How to Support a Friend with Self-Love and Body-Image
In this episode, Mary shares tips for talking to your friends about ANYTHING they’re struggling with- including body-image issues, food struggles, or self-love in general. She shares practical and tactical communication tools that she uses in all her relationships to make the other person feel seen, heard, and understood. She also gives tips for being an empath and not absorbing other people’s energy.

Remember: you are not supposed to “fix” anyone because they were never broken. Your only job is to be there for them.
Get a list of Mary’s favorite books here: https://maryscupoftea.com/books/

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27 min
April 30, 2020 #15: BTS of Being a Social Media Influencer with Chelsea Culbertson
In this episode we talk with Chelsea Culbertson (@choosingchelsea on Instagram) about what it’s like being a social media influencer. Chelsea shares how she uses her social media platform for good and creates healthy boundaries between consuming and creating on Instagram. We also talk about the pros and cons of TikTok and remind you that social media is not real life! No matter how “perfect” someone seems on their highlight reel, there is always SO much you don’t know about their behind-the-scenes.

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1 hr
April 23, 2020 #14: How to Stop Dieting, Restricting, and Binge Eating for Good
Diet culture is a vicious enemy that makes you believe that something is wrong with YOU if you don’t successfully lose weight. Being stuck in the diet cycle makes you spend every second of every day thinking about food and your body, which is no way to live your one precious life. Mary explains how dieting, restricting, and binge eating are all different sides of the same coin, so once you stop dieting and restricting, you will stop binge eating too.

In this episode, Mary shares how to end the diet-restrict-binge by reframing your mindset around food and your body. Mary also talks about the metaphysics of food (a term that’ll change your relationship with food forever) as well as the #1 mindset tool that helped her stop binge eating, forever. Our bodies are wise, so let’s learn to stop fighting them and trust that your body got your back.

Get ready to walk away feeling empowered, inspired, and ready to say f*ck you to diet culture.

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40 min
April 16, 2020 #13: Recovery & Relationships with Julia Parzyck
In this episode Mary talks with Julia Parzyck (@fitfatandallthat on Instagram) about how to nurture healthy relationships while working through eating disorder recovery, body-image issues, or normal daily life. Julia is passionate about educating girls and women to live a life outside of the diet culture, be aware of media manipulation, and embrace their true selves.

Mary and Julia bond over how they’re both sensitive, empathic women who often feel like they’re “too much” in their romantic relationships and how the roots of their eating disorders lie in sexual trauma. Julia also offers a practical approach to creating a healthy relationship with food and body by not letting your thoughts dictate your actions. As an ED recovery coach, Julia is amazing at giving practical advice while also making you feel seen, heard, and understood as a woman in this world.

This episode is relatable AF; just 2 women talking about their own struggles while hopefully helping you navigate yours. Let us know how you like this episode by tagging @maryscupofteaa and @fitfatandallthat in your IG stories

Books mentioned:
Attached by Amir Levine
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Beauty Sick by Renee Engeln
The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf

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56 min
April 09, 2020 #12: Making Money Online
In this episode Mary shares the different ways she makes money online including social media work, retreats, and online programs. Mary also talks about the importance of having a positive money mindset and treating money as an exchange of energy. We all deserve to make good money doing something we love because each of us have unique gifts, skills and passions that could be of value to others.

If you’ve always wanted to have a successful online business that allows for freedom and flexibility, this episode is for you!

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40 min
April 02, 2020 #11: Self Love During Crisis
The world is in crisis right now and we are all feeling it. In this episode, Mary gives you tips and tools to handle this tough time with self-compassion. If you use the tools Mary gives, this 15-minute episode will help you feel more positively during this time of uncertainty. Remember: you don't have to do anything right now unless it feels aligned to YOU. It doesn't matter what home workout that girl on social media is "recommending"; what does YOUR body, mind, and spirit need right now?

Sending you all so much love! Hang in there xx

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17 min
March 26, 2020 #10: Healing Sexual Trauma with Ailey Jolie
Ailey is Registered Clinical Counsellor with the British Columbia Association of Clinical Counsellors. She holds a Masters of Counselling Psychology and is a student in the Global Mental Health: Trauma and Recovery Certificate Program at Harvard Medical School. In this episode, Ailey shares with us how eating disorders can often come after sexual violence, whether that’s a microaggression or a macro one. She gives us permission to feel, tips to heal, and ways we can begin to reconnect to our bodies after trauma. Ailey emphasizes that she is not only a therapist, but a human like you, so she shares a lot of her personal journey of struggling with an eating disorder, being in the modeling/pageant industry, rejecting her sexuality, and healing from her own sexual violence.

“Deep” doesn’t even begin to describe the true depth of what Ailey shares so when you listen, make sure to give yourself the time, space, and grace to process everything she says and think about ways to apply it to your own self love and healing journey.
IG posts mentioned: What Type of Sex Serves You? https://www.instagram.com/p/B8hBhEeJwsC/

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1 hr 1 min
March 12, 2020 #9: Q&A with Mary
Q&A with Mary- ED Recovery, Social Media Business, Life Goals, & More!

Mary answers YOUR questions about everything from starting a business on social media, recovering from an eating disorder, and overcoming codependency. Here are the questions Mary answers:

Has being so open on social media affected your own eating disorder recovery? If so, how?
Your life goals! Career? Kids? Marriage?
How did you know you were ready to speak up and share your journey online?
How did you deal with your codependency?
Was one of your goals of ED recovery to stop thinking about food and weight all the time? If so, how do you deal with it now that your life is still about those topics?
Do you feel like it’s inappropriate to compliment someone’s physical features if they’ve suffered from an eating disorder? How do you give compliments about someone’s appearance without triggering someone?
How do you deal with others around you who are constantly negative about their own weight and self image?
What do you think about BMI? Does BMI show state of health in some way?
How do you create such consistent and relatable content all the time? How do you get more engagement on social media?
Did you ever lose your period during your eating disorder years? If so, how did you get your period back in recovery?
How did you start up your self love retreats?
I’m finally feeling really confident in my body after gaining a significant amount of weight. However, my mom invalidates that I’ve ever struggled with disordered eating and she constantly violates my boundaries by suggesting that I need to lose weight. I can handle criticism from random trolls, but my self love journey feels incomplete without my mom on-board. How do you handle pushback from people you love?

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1 hr 11 min