NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

By Christy Jade - Narcissistic Abuse Coach, Grey Rock Coach , Gaslighting Expert, No Contact MentorHealth & Fitness Mental Health Education Self-Improvement How To

Favorites
36
Followers
Typical duration
17 min
per episode

Based on Podcast App listening data

NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship episodes

March 17 Why You Don’t Trust Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse (And 3 Ways to Rebuild It)
Why You Don’t Trust Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse (And 3 Ways to Rebuild It)
If you’ve ever left a narcissistic relationship and thought, “How did I not see that?” or “Why don’t I trust my judgment anymore?” you’re not alone. One of the most damaging effects of narcissistic abuse is the way it erodes your self-trust.
Gaslighting, manipulation, and emotional conditioning slowly train you to question your own reality. Over time, you start doubting your instincts, your memories, and even your smallest decisions.
In this episode, Christy Jade explains why narcissistic abuse breaks your ability to trust yourself and shares three powerful ways to start rebuilding that trust so you can reclaim your peace, confidence, and inner authority.
Calm & Clarity Reset Call
Feeling overwhelmed, stuck in obsessive thoughts, or unsure what to do next in your healing journey?
This focused 60-minute session is designed to help you calm your nervous system, gain clarity on what you're experiencing, and walk away with clear next steps to protect your peace.
Book your Calm & Clarity Reset Call:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/calm-and-clarity-reset-call/
Transformational Coaching (3-Month Deep Dive)
This container is designed for women ready to break free from trauma bonds, rebuild self-trust, and create strong boundaries after narcissistic abuse. Together we work through mindset, somatic healing, emotional regulation, and practical boundary tools.
Apply for the 3-Month Deep Dive:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
For deeper healing and long-term transformation. This container supports women who want sustained guidance while rebuilding their identity, peace, and personal power after abuse.
Learn more:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
For women who want full support while completely rebuilding their life after narcissistic abuse. This container provides long-term guidance, accountability, and deep healing work.
Learn more:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Additional Support & Resources
Boundaries Pocket Guide (Free)
https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts
https://christyjade.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-scripts/
Empowered Boundaries Course
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Join the Free Facebook Community
https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
Contact:
00:00):
Good morning, Queens. It is Christie and we are diving right into it. I am sick, almost getting over this thing. So if my voice sounds a little froggy, you hear a lozenge tapping around my teeth, that's why. And maybe why this is a little late today. Usually I post it by 6:00 AM and it is now 9:15. So sorry for the delay, but hey, better late than ever? All right. So if you've ever left a narcissistic relationship and thought, how did I not see that? How did I stay so long? How did I do this to myself? How did I do this to my children? Why didn't I trust my gut? There were maybe some red flags. Why didn't I pay attention to them? And maybe now you find yourself second guessing everything. Your memories, your instincts, even small decisions like what to get at the store, what to eat, what to say in a text message.
(01:00)
If this is happening to you, I want you to hear this. You are not broken. Narcissistic abuse doesn't just hurt your heart. It erodes your ability to trust yourself. So today we're going to talk about why that happens and three ways to start rebuilding your self-trust. All right. So I'm your host, Christie Jade. Welcome if you are new here. Say hello. Follow my podcast so you get every episode. It's Tuesdays and Thursdays. And join the Facebook group. It's private and there's women just like you in there that are going through what you're going through and you can chatty chatsky and I post some quotes, sometimes the links to my podcast, and I'm going to start trying to do some mini videos in there. So definitely join that. That is in the description notes. So if you're here, you're probably someone who has experienced manipulation, gaslighting, emotional abuse, maybe physical abuse, maybe financial abuse from a narcissistic person.
(02:07)
And hold on. I'm going to spit out my laws and you get to hear this lovely. I didn't do video this week because no one needs to see what's happening. All right. So one of the most painful things that happens after a relationship with a narcissist is something people don't really talk about enough. You don't just lose the relationship. You lose trust in yourself. And often we lose a relationship and think, "Oh, I'm going to find this freedom. I'm going to feel so good. This is so hard, but at least I'm going to be free." But that freedom has a little price tag with it. And that is that often we have lost our trust in ourselves and maybe other people, right? But today we're talking about the self-trust that we do lose. And I hear it from clients all the time. I've been through it.
(02:59)
They say things like, "I don't trust my judgment anymore. I feel like I missed all the flags." Or maybe they saw a sliver, but all the good stuff kind of overrode it and they tried to rationalize it. Then they wonder, "What if I fall for this again?" That's a big question, right? And so I want to unpack why this happens and how to begin rebuilding that trust in yourself because here's the truth. Your intuition was not broken. It was buried under manipulation. Okay? So let's start with why this happens. Because once you understand the mechanism, it becomes much easier to stop blaming yourself because I really ... None of us look good in the blame crown. We want that shiny, gold, empowering crown that we deserve. So narcissistic relationships slowly train you to doubt your reality, right? This often happens through something called gaslighting, which many of you have probably heard of if you're in this narcissistic realm now.
(04:08)
Some of you may not, but it's when someone repeatedly denies your experience or they twist reality so you start questioning yourself. You might say something like, "That hurts my feelings." And they say, "You're too sensitive," or, "That never happened," or, "You're remembering it wrong. You're crazy. You're way too much." And when this happens over and over again, something very important starts to happen inside your brain. It's a real thing. Your brain begins to think, "Maybe I am wrong." And eventually you start doing something that feels safer in the moment. You start doubting yourself before they can even doubt you. Your brain learns that trusting yourself leads to conflict. Okay? I want to repeat that again. This is something we don't really know when we're in it. Your brain learns that trusting yourself, which you're supposed to do, but it is conditioned to think, which is your reality in the situation, that it leads to conflict.
(05:19)
And narcissists design that way on purpose. But questioning yourself keeps the peace. It keeps you safe in your situation. So you begin overriding your instincts. You ignore the gut feeling. You explain away the red flags. You tell yourself, "Oh, you're overreacting. You're just sensitive." And over time, this creates a deep wound to your self-trust. So when that relationship ends, you're left thinking, "How did I miss this? " But the truth is you didn't miss it. You were trained to override it. Okay? You didn't miss it. It was there, but you've been conditioned. And that conditioning takes some time to undo, but it can be done. Okay? So the three self-trust wounds survivors experience. We'll talk about those before we get into, let's fix this junk. All right? Most survivors experience three common self-trust wounds after narcissistic abuse. So the first is constant second guessing, right?
(06:30)
You question your memories, you replay conversations. You wonder if you're being too harsh or too forgiving. Even simple decisions can feel overwhelming because you're afraid of making the wrong choice. And the second wound is decision paralysis. I'm sure you're familiar with this one. When your confidence in your judgment has been shaken, your brain starts trying to avoid mistakes. So instead of choosing, you freeze. You ask 10 people for advice. You research endlessly. You overthink constantly because part of you is still afraid that trusting yourself will lead to danger as it did in the past, as we mentioned.
(07:18)
And the third wound is outsourcing your intuition. Instead of really getting calm with yourself, and that's why I'm such a big advocate of prayer and meditation, right? Spending time with yourself and relearning, retrusting yourself. But instead of checking in, you look to others for validation because you don't trust yourself. So what do you think I should do? Am I being unreasonable? Is this normal? And while support is sometimes helpful, healing means eventually coming back to the most important voice, which is your own. And I'm a God person. You don't have to be, but I am going to talk about God here on my podcast because I'm a God person and I relate that your own voice, your intuition to me is the Holy Spirit. So getting connected enough with yourself so that you are open to hearing God's voice.
(08:20)
So what are the three ways to rebuild that self-trust? The good news is this. You don't rebuild it through huge life decisions first. Okay? We do baby sparkle steps, small daily evidence. Okay? So number one, start with tiny decisions, tiny decisions. And I've done this on some of the somatic healing journeys we go through. I've had a couple people where we go through, we literally envision going shopping together and just choosing things you like because some people are so conditioned. They say they can't even go to a store and pick out a piece of artwork or a new coffee table because they second guess themselves so much because they've been conditioned this way. So somatic healing is an amazing way to recover from this. But anyway, so start with simple questions like, "What do I want to eat this morning? Like what do I really want to eat?
(09:22)
What would really make me happy to eat right now? Or what actually sounds fun right now?
(09:30)
Or what would feel good for my body today?" They seem like tiny things, especially to people who haven't gone through this, right? But every time you make a choice based on your own voice, you're sending your brain a powerful message. You're saying, "My preference matters. My voice matters." Self-trust is built through hundreds of small decisions, not one huge one, which is the good news because you can do tiny decisions. You can start with that. So as I mentioned, meditation, prayer goes under the umbrella of number two, reconnecting with your body. So after narcissistic abuse, many people live almost entirely in your head, right? You analyze everything. You think everything through, but your body is actually where a lot of wisdom is held. Your nervous system sends signals like a tight feeling in your chest, a sinking feeling in your stomach, or a sense of calm and expansion, right?
(10:43)
So learning to notice these signals, right? Stopping and getting in touch with your body. Again, prayer and meditation can be very similar. You're in quiet. You're with yourself. You have no distractions. It's just you and the big man upstairs, right?
(11:04)
I like to pray first, kind of like, "Dear God, please let me relax and help me not be distracted right now and shine the light on what you would like me to feel and know in this moment." And if there's specific things, you get into that, either in prayer or meditation and notice what's happening to your body. Sometimes your body knows the truth before your mind is ready to accept it. That can happen, right? That's why this somatic work, grounding exercises or simply pausing to ask, "How does this feel in my body?" Can be powerful. I do that a lot. I go, "Okay, if my brain is like, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. " Which I had actually a big situation like that recently. Guilt was coming up of saying no to something. And I said, "All right, body, it's time.
(12:04)
What is my body saying?" And immediately I knew my throat was tight, my shoulders were up to my damn ears. My body was saying, "No, I can't and I don't want to do this. " You have to listen to your body, all right? The body is very, very powerful. We just need to tap into it. All right? So the third thing, keep small promises to yourself.
(12:35)
Self-trust grows through follow through. Okay? So you make huge commitments or huge, "I'm going to do this. I'm going to do that. " You can set yourself up for a letdown and to worsen the self-trust, right? So a smaller promise could be going for a walk you said you take, right? That self-care. So saying, "You know what? This week, Thursday at four o'clock, no matter what, I'm going for a 10 minute walk. We're talking small commitments. Okay? Next week you can make a 20, a 10 minute walk just to be with myself, to clear my head, to feel my body. It could be speaking up about something small or saying no when something doesn't feel right. Maybe that doesn't have to be a big decision this week, but maybe someone asks you to do a favor and say, Oh, hey, can you meet me up at the church to put together the cupcake, whatever, I don't know, before the bake sale.
(13:49)
And you are really spread thin and you're realizing you need some more time for you, which is okay. You don't have to be everywhere for everyone. You could say, "You know what? I don't have time for that, but thank you for asking and I'd love to help in the future." Okay? No committing to anything else right now or you're committing to yourself right now or setting a boundary and sticking to it. This could be even with your kids. Maybe you are someone who has some guilt from staying in a bad situation and you feel bad and so you let your kids get away with the lot of stuff and they've been pushing more boundaries lately. And this week your teen is really upset and they think you're the worst because you don't let them do X, Y, Z. Everyone else does this and that, and you always cave.
(14:52)
This week, maybe you don't cave. Maybe you say, "I love you. I need to do what I think is right for you. " And you can't go to that party when you have a test the next day, whatever it is, setting the boundary and sticking to it. You've got to stick to it. So each time you do that, you're telling your nervous system, "I've got you, baby. I've got you. " And over time, those small moments stack up until one day you realize something amazing. You're not asking everyone else what to do anymore. You're checking in with you first.
(15:37)
And it's not going to be overnight, but it can happen. Just practice these little sparkle steps, do some somatic healing with me, right? If you take one thing from this episode, I want it to be this, okay? The narcissist did not destroy your intuition. It is not kaboom, boom, bow, gone. They simply taught you to ignore it. They did. They conditioned you. They did it on purpose and screw them, but that's another episode. Okay? Healing is the process of remembering your inner voice was always there. It was always there and it's still there. I always say, right? It's like I have a book called Solid Gold Mama. It's the same kind of idea. We have this solid gold inside of us, right? That's our intuition. That's our Holy Spirit. That's God's word. It's there. It does not go anywhere. You cannot damage or undo solid gold.
(16:41)
You just can't. It's there. It's beautiful. It gets covered up by dirt. It gets covered up by mud. It might get dinks that pop right back out though. They will pop back out, but you cannot destroy that beautiful solid gold inside of you. And the more you listen to your intuition, the more solid it stays. The more when someone tries to kick it, it can't even get dinked. Okay? Is dink a word? I want to stop saying dink right now. All right? But if rebuilding self-trust is something you're working on, this is the work we do inside my coaching containers, right? Helping women reclaim their peace, protect your power, and rebuild trust in yourself after this abuse. And you can find all the links in the show notes. I do have three programs that are three, six, and 12 months. If you would like to get a taste of this amazing work, there is a one-off call you can do so we can chat, see if it's a good fit, and do maybe a little tapping.
(17:59)
If you don't know what tapping is, it's so fun.
(18:04)
We can work on that, depending on how the call goes. Sometimes it's mostly talking. We'll try to fit something in at the end. If it's not a lot of talking, we can have a longer session. It's whatever you need will happen. And you have to trust that. I know that's hard for us, but trust that that will happen. No session is the same. No one session is the same for all my clients and even within one of my clients. I have clients that have been with me for years and none of their sessions are ever the same. And it is amazing work. So when you sign on, we do long-term. In the beginning, it might be a little more talking and some somatic. Some clients come in and where they are, they talk a little and most of the session can be somatic. Or it might be one session, they're really drained and just want to have a quiet somatic session, or they feel really chatty and they want to talk and get out their stuff and then navigate how to work with their co-parent.
(19:11)
And then the next week we'll calm their nervous system with the beautiful joy ride soul cation. There is so much magic in this work. I just love it. I love it. I love it. Obviously, that's why I do it. So if you're interested in doing one of those calls, whether it's a one-off call or diving right into one of the programs where you do save money, the longer you commit, that's just how these things work, right? All those options are in the show notes. And again, join the Facebook group. There's a boundaries, little freebie pocket guide. If you're not the best at boundaries, there is actually an empowered boundaries course. That's there if you want to check that out. All my stuff's always in the show notes. Okay? And if you have any questions, my email's always there too. FiercemamaC@gmail and you can write me, just say hello.
(20:05)
I answer every single email myself, which won't be forever. I am getting more emails and more clients and all of that, but while it's there, take advantage of it and say hello and I will write you back directly. All right. I hope you guys have a beautiful Tuesday, Wednesday, whenever you listen to this. And don't forget, Thursday is our Thrive in Five, and that will be a beautiful and related to today's episode, Somatic Healing Experience. So I hope you all can join me for that. So definitely, again, follow the podcast. This is an ongoing journey that every episode builds on the last one. So it's like this stacked journey of joy. All right? I love you guys. I'll see you in the next one. Bye.
21 min
March 12 Hate Seeing the Narcissist Move On? Try This 5-Minute Reset
Seeing the narcissist appear happy, thriving, or “better off without you” can trigger a wave of anger, sadness, and self-doubt. Many survivors of narcissistic abuse find themselves measuring their healing by what the narcissist’s life looks like now.
In this Thrive in 5 episode, Christy Jade walks you through a short EFT tapping practice to help calm your nervous system and break the mental loop of comparing your life to theirs.
Because the truth is this: your healing has nothing to do with whether the narcissist seems to be winning. Your healing is about reclaiming your peace, your power, and your focus.
If you’ve been stuck checking their social media, wondering if they’re happier, or feeling triggered when it looks like they’ve moved on quickly, this episode will help you shift your energy back where it belongs — on your life.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
• Why your brain keeps tracking what the narcissist is doing after the relationship
• The nervous system pattern that keeps survivors focused on the narcissist
• How EFT tapping can interrupt obsessive thinking and emotional triggers
• A guided tapping sequence to release the need to monitor their life
Feeling stuck in the mental loop of the narcissist? Let’s reset it.
If you’re tired of the obsessive thoughts, emotional triggers, or constantly replaying what happened, my Calm & Clarity Reset Call is designed to help you shift out of that spiral quickly.
In this focused 1:1 session we’ll calm your nervous system, untangle what’s actually keeping you stuck, and create clear next steps so you can move forward with confidence.
Book your Reset Call here:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/calm-and-clarity-reset-call/
3-Month Coaching Container: Reclaim Your Peace
This container is designed for women who are ready to stabilize their nervous system, rebuild self-trust, and start creating real emotional freedom after narcissistic abuse.
Apply here:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Coaching Container: Queens of Peace
For deeper healing and long-term transformation. Together we work through trauma patterns, boundaries, nervous system regulation, and rebuilding the life you want after abuse.
Apply here:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Coaching Container
This is the highest level of support for women ready to fully reclaim their power and build a life that feels peaceful, confident, and aligned.
Apply here:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Additional Support & Resources
Boundaries Pocket Guide (Free)
https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts
https://christyjade.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-scripts/
Empowered Boundaries Course
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Free Facebook Community
https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
Contact:
00:00):
Hello. I have to do some intro music because I don't have time to do the whole thing this week. So we're going to go. I forgot my music. Welcome back to Narcissistic Abuse Recovery with me. How's that? Should that be my new diddy? All right. So you guys, yes, it's been a crazy week, kind of a tough week. If I'll be honest, we all have our weeks. A kind of tough week for me. I know I want to talk about stuff more, so maybe I'll take that opportunity. So also connect in the Facebook group, you guys. Don't forget. Don't forget. It's always in the show notes. You can join there. It's a private group. So it's not public. No one can see it. And there's questions to make sure no sketchies or bots get in there. You have to provide your email, all of that good stuff so we know it's like a safe place to chat.
(00:56)
That being said, yeah, there's been some shifts and I am very excited to really focus on my business and just really concentrating on my book. I've been working on my book, if you guys don't know that, which is related to narcissistic abuse recovery. Very excited about it. And I have some really cool leads where hopefully it will be able to get seen and impact more people than I hoped even. So cross your fingers and pray for that. You know my goal is to help as many women as I can deal with ... And men. I've had men write me too that listen to this podcast. So thank you. Thank you. This advice is not just for women. That's true. I just happened to specialize in working with women because I'm a woman and I know the woman things. But also if you hear it, I don't know if I'm getting sick or it's the crazy weather here in the DMV.
(02:00)
I live right outside of Washington DC. And right now it's dropping dramatically to 30 something degrees when it was 84 degrees yesterday. It's wild. It's been absolutely wild weather here. So hold on to your seats where you are too. I heard there's some weird shifting in Colorado or Utah too, just some weird weather patterns. So here we are. Anyway, but I wanted to connect about ... I'm on this journey and sometimes we have to pivot and people like us who have gone through a lot sometimes are afraid to say no or afraid to make decisions that may impact other people and stay stuck because we have a tendency to people please. And we kind of have that, "Oh, I want people to like me and whatever." It's like this conditioning when you've gone through abusive situations where you feel like, "Yeah, I really don't want to upset anyone." And that's a great goal.
(03:30)
We never want to upset anyone, right? But sometimes when things are not aligned in whatever way, you do have to make decisions and you have to do what is right for you, which usually, let's be honest, is right for everyone because you're not going to be the best you if you stay in a relationship and whatever situation, if you're staying out of fear. So if you're in any situation right now where you're staying out of fear of either letting someone down, which is, that's my biggest thing. I do not like to let people down. It will eat at me and that's something I've worked on. And so my body, look, my somatic body's still catching up with that a little bit. I know it's okay to do and that we're not going to make everyone a thousand percent happy all of the time. However, my body still is a little stuck going, "Oh, but it still feels bad a little bit." So that's why we do these certain things like tapping we're going to do today.
(04:50)
It's an example to show you this is like life doesn't stop lifeing. Your feelings don't stop. When you're quote healing, that doesn't mean you don't feel things or you don't get triggered or you don't have certain reactions. It's having the tools with, well, how do you deal with it when it comes up? So yes, this week I've had triggers, I've had guilty feelings, all sorts of stuff come out and I have the tools that I have so my body and nervous system can go, "You're still safe. It's not the end of the world. Your brain knows that, but this body over here is having a little trouble." So you're going to have reactions. Today we're going to do tapping around watching them move on. This is a theme that has come up with multiple clients of mine. So like recently, so I noticed a pattern and was like, maybe this is God telling me I need to do a tapping session in general.
(05:51)
And I was first just going to put it on like YouTube, like do a short on YouTube or Instagram and maybe I'll still do that. But I felt like, well, where's my real audience? Where are my peeps? And you're here. So even though we're on audio, I'm going to walk you through and tell you what to do with the tapping. I'm doing a video. I look like trash because I'm not feeling very well, but I'm going to put the video on YouTube. So I will link that in the show notes so you are able to get the visual if you want it and just don't mind my trash look. Today, what is it? Thursday? Thursday's trash look like Christie. All right. So watching them move on. First we're going to talk about it real quick. Watching them move on is never easy. Even if let's say you're the one who decided to end the relationship, you're the one who decided to walk away or just you know it wasn't right and that they were mistreating you, all of this.
(06:51)
And you're like, "Well, why do I still care? Why am I still looking at their social media? Why am I still upset when I see my ex, let's say it's co-parenting." When I see him now dating someone and logically you get upset with yourself going, "Why do I care? I know he's not good for me. I don't want to be with him. He's awful. Why do I care?" But that is a part of this. It's because you've been so conditioned by this type of person and that's a whole other episode in and of itself. Part of that can be worse tying to comparison. They have moved on and maybe you haven't or they move on and you look at this new person thinking, "Oh my God, is she better than me? " Do they think she's nicer? Are they going to treat her so good?
(07:50)
Thinking that this partner's going to change, which no, they'll treat her like trash eventually too. They will love Bomb like they did with you in the beginning, right? But a leopard's a leper, right? Those spots don't change with narcissist usually. Also, what do we call that 0.0060147% that change? Maybe, but let's not hold our breath for that. So you get my point, right? You often want to look at yourself and have that strength to say, "I don't care. I don't care." But you're human and you've been conditioned and there are worth issues for you that have stemmed from being in a relationship like this where you are now trying to figure out your worth by what they're doing. And so we're going to end that. We're going to end that today. So with tapping, you tap certain points. Now I got to put ... Where am I going to put my microphone?
(08:54)
I didn't think about this. I'm holding my microphone because I'm in my bed today. It's a lazy day. I usually have it on a desk, so I'm going to have to figure out what to do with that. But the tapping points, when you tap them, you do this karate chop point in the beginning. That's to activate. I call them like the energy channels, right? Where this stuff really gets more embodied in your body rather than just words. Words are great too. Repetition. There's all sorts of things that can help rewire the brain. Tapping it in your body is another level where you're doing these points and your body's starting to viscerally feel and accept, right? Kind of digest what you're saying with your brain now that's signaling your body once you're opening these channels. So it's finally working in parallel rather than just the brain going, "Oh yeah, I know logically I shouldn't care." But your body's like, "But I care." Right?
(09:46)
Does that make sense? Good. All right. So this practice will help release the habit of measuring your healing by what a former partner, friend, boss, whatever, parent is doing with their life. Maybe it's after you have cut them off, maybe you're co-parenting. This is the one that's come up a lot in the last couple of weeks for my clients, seeing that they really are having trouble with seeing their exes move on and questioning themselves because of it. So it's bringing focus back to you, your body, your nervous system, and your own healing, because that's what matters. What they're doing really has nothing to do with you, but I know sometimes that's hard for us to ... We can hear it, but to process it is a very different thing, right? All right. So that being said, let's start. So it's good with tapping, so you just get a sense.
(10:51)
You first will rate zero to 10. You will ask, when you think about what their life looks like compared to yours in general, or with this person, a new person, or just in general, maybe they got this amazing job or they got the gorgeous house or the race car or the donuts. Okay. Notice how activated your body is, right? How do you feel? Not your thoughts, but really like, how's your body feeling? Rate it from zero to 10, the intensity of that anxiousness or annoyance or whatever comes up. We don't need to label the feeling. We're labeling the intensity of that feeling, zero to 10. So I'm going to zoom back on my own life. I had broken up with a narcissist, and I will tell you it was my choice.
(11:54)
At that point, finally, I had gone back to him and broken up, but when I really ended it the last time, I was very, very sure. When I ran into him, how many years later I had that visceral reaction. I had it in my body of, A, just him moving on. He was with someone else. I was like, all these thoughts of, "Oh, what if she's more this? What if she's more that? " Even though I didn't want to be with him, it was just how this kind of works. I'm trying to think viscerally what that would've been like then. Probably an eight and I wasn't even ... I mean, that was a couple years after. So that intensity, what is that, zero to 10? Just remember that number. And now we're going to go into the actual tapping. So of course, get settled and take a good halo breath through your nose and now at your mouth.
(12:52)
Let your body just settle a little bit. And all right. So the karate chop point. I guess it's good I'm holding my microphone because I'm going to have to describe it without doing it for you audio people. But no, I do need to find something. Hold on. Let me see.
(13:14)
Okay. So karate chop is halfway between the bottom of your pinky and the bottom of your palm on the side. So it's the sides of your hands in the middle there, in the meaty part, each hand. And if you're watching, you can see me. Okay? If you're not, you basically put those in a cross position like perpendicular. So those spots are meeting and you're just bouncing, right? One, two, three. You just, you're karate chopping your hands together, opening the channel. This part you only have to do once when you are starting the rounds. We're going to do three rounds today. Yeah. Okay? So got your karate chop point. I got my little script. I made a beautiful script for you guys. All right. So you're going to repeat after me while you're just doing the karate chop point. As we're opening up, just listen to these words and repeat after me.
(14:20)
Even though I keep measuring my healing by what their life looks like, I deeply and completely accept myself.
(14:37)
Okay. Next. Even though part of me keeps checking, whether they're doing well or not, my nervous system learned to watch them to stay safe. Okay. Last one here. Even though my mind keeps going back to their life, I'm open to bringing my attention back to myself. All right. So now we're getting to the regular tapping part here. Okay? So we're going to have three rounds. Round one is acknowledging the pain. So let me tell you the points. As we go in round one, I'll tell you where to put your fingers. We're going to use your first, middle and ring finger, keep them together, right? Like they're little buddies, their cousins hanging out. And on the eyebrow, we're going to start right in the center, like where your eyebrow starts essentially, right? And you're just going to tap there and repeat everything after me. I'm not going to say it every time.
(15:48)
So anything I say, I'm giving you space to repeat. All right. So this is acknowledging the pain, round one.
(15:55)
So we're on that eyebrow point. I keep thinking about what their life looks like. Side of the eye on the temple, same three fingers. My mind keeps checking on them. Under the eye, that orbital bone right there. Are they happy? Are they struggling? Now under the nose, this is halfway between the nose and the upper lip. It feels like that somehow means something about me. Chin, just in the middle of the chin. My brain learned to monitor them. Then we go to the collarbone. I kind of spread my fingers out a little bit here. That's what helped me survive the relationship.
(17:04)
You can do underarm where the bra strap would lay on the side of your body. My nervous system got used to tracking them. They were going to bring it to the top of the head, right in the center, so that your three fingers are like in a line front to back. And that habit is still there. Round two, we're doing understanding the nervous system here. Okay? Back to the eyebrow. My brain still thinks I need to watch them. Side of the eye, temple, as if their life determines my healing. Under the eye. But that's an old survival pattern.
(18:10)
Under the nose. My body was trained to stay focused on them. Now the chin, but I don't have to live there anymore. Collarbone. I can start bringing the focus back to me. Underarm. My healing lives in my body. That's right, Queen. Back to top of the head. Not in what their life looks like. Okay. For round three, reclaiming focus. Okay, go back to that eyebrow. I'm allowed to stop measuring my healing by them. Side eye. I can measure healing by my peace. Yes. It's the good stuff. Round three is always the best. Under the eye, by my calm, under the nose, by my boundaries.
(19:42)
The chin. My ability to choose myself. Collarbone. My nervous system learning safety again. Underarm. My life getting bigger. Top of the head. And them becoming less important. All right. Now place a hand on your heart. Take a nice, slow inhale through the nose and release. Notice your body. Ask yourself what feels different in my body right now. Not your emotions, what feels different? Small shifts in your breath. Your shoulders, tension, your chest. All signs that your nervous system is healing. That shift is actual healing. So going back to that zero to 10 scale, we started where maybe it was a seven or an eight. What is it now?
(21:14)
I imagine it's dropped. That's why we do this, right? And that is proof that your body absolutely can heal through this type of work, right? Through rewiring plus coding it through the body with methods like tapping. There are many more, but tapping is always a fun intro one. So if you want more, if you want more, if you want one-on-one somatic healing like this with the coaching and navigating like we do all of it, I will have all of my offers listed. I do have ... Let's see. Let me look. I think I have two more openings for the month of March for my special calm and clarity reset calls. And I can tell you what is included in that. So that is one call. It's 60 minutes. It's a Zoom. It's to help calm the emotional overwhelm quickly, to feel grounded instead of reactive, a safe space to talk through what's happening, and then personalized boundary or response guidance.
(22:35)
And then a clear next step, plan. What do you need to do next? And then options for continued support. So ongoing support is what makes true transformation, obviously. So this can be a lead into that. This can be a, "Oh, I'm curious about this work. Let me try it. " And if you like it, you can have ongoing support with me once a week and work on not just the mindset, not just navigating. And we do that and that's great, but also this mind-blowing body work, this somatic healing that to me was the missing piece of the puzzle for so many years. So you'll walk away with a calmer nervous system, right? Not just talking it out. Sometimes we can talk it out and feel worse or just heavy. And then the clearest next step for your situation. And then if you want to work on a script, a boundary, a response plan, if you're in a situation made with a co-parent or a parent, your own parent, whatever the situation is so that you can just have some clarity and calm because those are a big part of peace.
(23:54)
And you know, I'm the queen of peace over here. So I hope you enjoyed this. And definitely look at, go check out the Calm and Clarity Reset call, sign up for that. And then if you know you want ongoing work, which some people just jump into, I have three, six, and 12 month options. Everything's listed in my description box. Okay? So definitely come, do the one-on-one work. You deserve it. There is so much transformation that you can have that you have no idea the joy and peace you can feel until you do this work, especially if you're someone who went through a lot of childhood stuff. You may not know what it feels like to be at peace and to be clearheaded and to trust yourself. And we do all of that work, but that is, you got to show up. And that is the ongoing work to do that level of transformation.
(24:56)
So if what you want to do right now is just a one-off call to just get a little nervous system calm and a little direction, great. If you want to see about ongoing work but want to test it out, that call's great for that too. And if you just want to dive the hell in, like some of my clients do, they skip that call and they're like, "I know I need to do this. " There are all those options too. And with those calls also, the longer you sign up, there are different pricing tiers you do save if you sign up for a little longer term and you get the benefits of getting access to me every day, not all day, every day. I got a life guys, but on an app called Voxer. So you can text or leave voice message for me between the weekly calls, which my clients love this bonus.
(25:54)
And this is only with the ongoing packages, but it's great for when you're just spinning out and you need a little either talk it out or a little, I give customized even like tappings or affirmations, customized different little somatic methods I can give through the app. And or if someone's asking, right? I have co-parents ask advice like, "Oh my gosh, he just wrote me this. What should I respond?" Stuff like that. Okay? So it is a great, great bonus you have when you do ongoing work with me. But either way, sign up. If you have not done somatic healing, let's do it. Can we please do this together? It's amazing. So sign up there and don't forget to follow. Like I said, this is an ongoing thing. So you want to get as many of these episodes in as you can. Thursdays are the Thrive in Five.
(26:52)
So that's the ones you want to save and you can use at your leisure when things come up to help your body chill, your mind chill. So don't forget to follow on whatever platform you're on so you don't miss any of these episodes. Okay? All right. You are queens. I love you guys so much. I will let you go and I will see you in the next one. Bye.

28 min
March 10 Why Do Narcissists Suddenly Act Nice ? The Truth Behind Hoovering
Have you ever noticed that just when you start moving on… the narcissist suddenly becomes kind again? Sweet messages. Apologies. Promises to change. It can make you question everything.
In this episode, Christy explains the manipulation tactic known as hoovering—why narcissists suddenly act nice when they feel you pulling away, how this behavior fits into the narcissistic abuse cycle, and what you can do to protect your peace. If you've ever wondered whether their sudden kindness means they've truly changed, this episode will give you clarity.
🎧 Listen to the episode:
https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-fh2h2-1945389
Your Next Step in Healing
If you're dealing with hoovering, emotional manipulation, or the lingering effects of narcissistic abuse, you don't have to navigate it alone. These patterns can be confusing and exhausting—but clarity and peace are possible.
Working together can help you break trauma bonds, rebuild self-trust, and confidently protect your boundaries.
1:1 Coaching Support
3-Month Transformational Coaching Container
This container is designed for women who want focused support breaking free from narcissistic abuse patterns, strengthening boundaries, and reclaiming their peace.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
For deeper transformation, this program helps you fully rebuild self-trust, emotional stability, and confidence after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
The most comprehensive option for women who want sustained support while rebuilding their life, identity, and relationships after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Additional Support & Resources
Boundaries Pocket Guide (Free)
Learn how to set boundaries without guilt.
https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts
Exact scripts to handle narcissistic texts and manipulation.
https://christyjade.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-scripts/
Empowered Boundaries Course
Build strong boundaries that actually stick.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Join the Free Facebook Community
Connect with other women healing after narcissistic abuse.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
Related Episode
How to Spot a Narcissist in 60 Seconds
One of the most popular episodes of the show. Learn the fast red flags that reveal narcissistic behavior early.
https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-4sj92-15e6a4b
Contact
Email: 00:00):
Ever notice this? You finally start pulling away from the narcissist, you get strong, you get fierce and queeny, and suddenly they're nice again, overly nice. Sweet texts, apologies, promises. Today, we're talking about why narcissists suddenly act nice and the manipulation tactic called hoovering that pulls so many people back in. Welcome to your Thursday Thrive In Five, your five-minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text you knew better than to reply to. Take a breath queen, this one's for you. All right, queens. It is Christie with the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Podcast. Welcome back or welcome if you are a newbie, a newbie queen. Welcome to the show. Today, we're talking about something that confuses almost everyone who has dealt with a narcissist. You start getting your power back, right? You stop chasing them. You stop overexplaining yourself or explaining yourself at all. And out of nowhere, they're nice again.
(01:10)
And you're like, "What just happened? What's happening?" And this usually shows up right when you start detaching. So maybe you stop texting back so fast because you are losing the conditioning that everything is urgent when it's not. Maybe you set a boundary and say, "I'm not going to let you talk to me like X, Y, Z anymore." Maybe you emotionally checked out. Maybe it's been a while, you are burnt out from their nasty, sticky, ugly spiderweb and you're just disconnected. And suddenly they miss you. They appreciate you. They're sorry. I have quotes up if you can't see me in the video. If you're just on audio, I'm putting a little quotation over that, sorry, because they're fake apologies. Okay? Or our personal favorite here, "I've been doing a lot of thinking." And your brain goes, "Wait, maybe they are really changing." But what you may be experiencing is called hoovering.
(02:19)
So what is hoovering? It is named after yes, the vacuum brand, because the narcissist is trying to suck you back in. When they feel you pulling away, they switch strategies. Instead of criticism, they'll give charm. Instead of distance, they will give you and shower you maybe even with attention. Instead of blaming you, they will give apologies. But the goal usually is not healing. The goal is regaining access to you. I'm going to repeat that again. Their goal is not healing, which it would be lovely if it was, but it is regaining access to you and control over you. In case you're new here, all narcissists seek really is control and that feeds them. So why do they suddenly act nice? There's a few reasons this happens. First, they feel that control slipping. When you stop reacting, it changes the whole dynamic. They love a good reaction.
(03:29)
It shows them that you're under their control, that you are affected by them and they love it. It feeds them. It literally feeds them. So the narcissists rely heavily on emotional reactions. So when that supply, as we call it in this world, narcissistic supply, when that supply disappears, they try to get it back. Second, they want to reset the cycle. So narcissistic relationships usually move through phases. We have the love bombing, right? And that's like right when you meet them, they love bomb you to get you. And then that comes back. There are these cycles. So love bombing, devaluing. That's when they start treating you poorly. Even they can start out slow sometimes where just like little dismissive comments that just kind of like beat you down a little by little emotionally, maybe physically, right? They're devaluing you. And then the discard where they really are treating you almost like trash.
(04:35)
And then comes the hoovering. That's the cycle reset. So if they can pull you back in, the pattern starts again. So they will do that love bombing. The hoover you in, love bomb you, go back to devaluing and discard, push you to that edge again, bring you back in. It is a hideous, hideous cycle. Why it is so confusing. Here's the tricky part. Sometimes during hoovering, they really do seem different. They're good at what they do usually. They're kinder, more thoughtful. One of my recent clients, an ongoing client of mine, during one of these cycles, he was buying her all of a sudden, and this is years into it. She had really pulled away a lot, set major boundaries, left him. He hoovered her back in. And what happened? He love bombed her with trips, beautiful gifts. Let's do this to the house, whatever you want, baby.
(05:47)
Start being more thoughtful. Let me bring you coffee in the morning. This is such a perfect example of love bombing after Hoovering. And it will and can make you question everything. You start wondering, maybe I misunderstood them. The most common one I see is maybe they've changed. Something like ... They realize what they lost and now they're going to change. But what's important to look at is patterns over time. So real change does not show up as a few nice texts or even a couple trips, right? It shows up as consistency, accountability, respect for boundaries. So if you are in a phase, and I hope you're not, and I hope you don't get Hoover back in, but if you're in the midst of it right now and you've been Hoovered and you're back in and like, wait, he is acting, he or she is acting different.
(06:48)
You've got to maybe even test things, set a boundary, see their reaction, right? Do a couple boundaries. Really test for that accountability and not just lip service on things that matter, not just a nice gift, not the things that are easy emotionally, right? A little easier than actually emotionally having to show up. And most importantly, which this is the hard part, right? Is does it last? And unfortunately, if you're in it right now, you may not know that until you've been in this cycle a little longer. But if you know the cycle goes back and forth and back and forth like this, that should be enough clarity for you to say, "Oh, this is a big pattern. We've done this three times. We've done this eight times. We've done this 90 times. It's time for me to pick up and go. " So the question that changes everything, instead of asking, are they finally changing?
(07:57)
Try asking, does this match their long-term pattern?
(08:03)
Because narcissists often become the nicest version of themselves right when they feel they're losing you. Not because they've transformed, right? That's not why, but because they want the connection and the control back. They want that cycle back. So if the narcissist in your life suddenly becomes nice when you start to pull away, or even if you're co-parenting, right? And you'll probably go through this. And this is what really mind F's everybody in these situations because you'll be like, "But he was so nice. Wait." And then now he's acting whatever again. And it's like you can even forget sometimes in the midst of their niceness, just how awful they've been because you're swooped up in their niceness. So this can happen whether you are currently with someone or if you are having to deal with someone like an ex that you're co-parenting with, or maybe your parent that you are maybe a little distanced with, but you have to deal with them and you're confused because you're like, "Well, they're nice to me the last couple weeks." And then next week you don't know what's going to happen.
(09:21)
But secret is you do know. If there's all these narcissistic traits, and you can go through my episodes to find those episodes, I'll try to remember to link one of them, the traits of narcissism. You can figure out what and who they are and look for the patterns. So if they're nice to you when you start pulling away, when you start creating boundaries, when you're like, "I'm not doing this anymore," pause, breathe, breathe, do that halo breath in through the nose, out through the mouth and remember kindness during hoovering is often part of the cycle, right? Not the end of it, it's part of the cycle. It never ends at kindness. It never ends at love bombing. A cycle never ends.
(10:19)
The worst case scenario cycle is it ends when you have got the real short end of the stick in many ways, right? We don't want you getting there. We don't want you to get to that point. We want you to get out of this cycle, right? So your job is not to decode them, not to figure out, have they changed? You've seen the patterns. You know what's coming next. This is a cycle. It's a cycle. Cycles doesn't have an end, right? Your job isn't to figure that out. We figured it out for you. You're in a cycle and your job is to protect your peace, however you can do that. I know it's very hard if you are in a co-parenting situation, but there are ways to do that. Obviously, I would say right now, 90, 95% of my clients are co-parents, maybe a little less right now.
(11:31)
It goes up and down, but generally, it's usually at least 80% of my clients, right? Our co-parents in crazy situations, and we are able to, one, navigate them.
(11:44)
I help with that. And then two, help your nervous system. So no matter what situation you're in, the beauty of the somatic healing we do, that's the body, healing through the body, no matter what you're going through, we can help heal your body in any situation. So that's the beauty of this work, right? We can help you navigate. We can't control other people. We can't control what they say or do, but you can control and start to alter through healing, through the body healing, be able to start at a higher vibe, essentially, and be able to deal with more and navigate easier and start to know yourself, trust yourself, and be built strong like a bull with a queen's crown on, so that you can find more peace. Your job is to protect your peace. Your job is not to control them or to change them or to figure them out.
(12:48)
Your job is to protect yourself and your children, if that's the case.
(12:57)
So if you're dealing with any sort of narcissistic or toxic situation right now, and you want to have a one-on-one customized session with me, I will link my information in the show notes. It should be in the little description box. There's always my links to work with me, and you can email me with any questions. I read every single email, and just know that you're not alone. There's a Facebook community just waiting for you to join, and it's private. So I will link that in the show notes as well. So check out all the things in the show notes, and don't forget to follow, because this is a long term journey, right? Narcissistic abuse, and it ain't easy going through it. So in solidarity, be with your people, be with us, come listen to these. Thursdays are my shorter somatic healing little methods, tips, and tricks, and tools, little bite-size episodes that you can save for when you're having a moment, when you're spiraling, when you're questioning yourself.
(14:08)
So those are on Thursdays. So make sure you do follow my podcast so you get notifications, so you'd know when I'm like, "Hey girl, hey, it's time." Yes, Queen, it's time. So Tuesdays and Thursdays, and yes, if you have any questions at all, feel free to email me at fiercemamase@gmail. It's also in the description, and I hope you are having a beautiful day. Don't let the narcs keep you down. All right, shine your crown. I'll see you in the next one. Bye.
15 min
March 05 How to Handle Narcissist Texts in Minutes Without Losing Your Peace
Narcissists love sending ‘urgent’ texts to hijack your peace. In this episode, Christy explains why they do it and how to shut it down fast—so you can stay calm, confident, and in control
📥 Free Gift: The Boundaries Pocket Guide
Want to stop second-guessing yourself and finally set boundaries that stick without the guilt spiral?
Download Christy’s free Boundaries Pocket Guide — designed to help you reclaim your peace and protect your power after narcissistic abuse.
✨ Grab it here → https://christyjade.kit.com/ce79ea9250
🛠️ Ready to Go Deeper in Your Healing?
Whether you’re newly out or years into recovery, support changes everything.
Here are 3 powerful ways to work with Christy:
✅ Reclaiming You: 1:1 Clarity & Intake Session
💻 Book here: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/
✅ 1-Month Private Coaching Container
💻 Apply here: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-monthly/
✅ 3-Month Transformational Coaching Package
💻 Learn more: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
🔗 Related Episodes You’ll Love:
🎧 Still Attached to the Narcissist? This Deep Cord Cutting Practice Can Help
👉 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/still-attached-to-the-narcissist-this-deep-cord/id1662241353?i=1000708306120
🎧 Thrive in 5: Still Energetically Tied to the Narcissist? Cut the Cord With This Quick Practice
👉 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/still-energetically-tied-to-the-narcissist-cut-the/id1662241353?i=1000706789155

✨ Follow Christy on Instagram →
https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/

TRANSCRIPT
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text you knew better than to reply to take a breath Queen. This one's for you. All right, queen, let's talk about that moment. Your phone dings and suddenly your peace is gone. It's the narcissist and the message is urgent. Or at least they say it is. Maybe it's call me now or it's an emergency, or it's important answer or even as low as the kids need. You sound familiar? Well, here's what you need to know. Those out of nowhere or urgent type texts are rarely about real emergencies. They're about control. A narcs favorite word. Alright? So a narcissist wants you to yank out of your calm, especially if you're doing well, you're moving on. Ooh, that irks them, right? They want to spike your anxiety and test if they still have access to you, if you're still going to take the bait, if you're still going to respond.
(01:22)
I always say, don't take the bait, keep it very simple. Gray rock method. We talked about that on Tuesday's episode, speaking of which, this episode is related to Tuesday's episode, which was all about these texts, and today is just a quick tool to handle them, basically handling those fake emergency texts. So step one, pause. Do not reply instantly. And we mentioned this in Tuesdays, but that's a quick note, right? Just pause. The pause puts you back in the driver's seat. So when you feel like stressed out, when you read it, take a breath and pause. Two, check the facts. Is it truly urgent? If it's not about your kid's safety or something, life or death, it can wait. Step three, respond and don't react. Keep it short, neutral and business-like that. Gray rock method. So an example, and I go over this all more in depth than Tuesday's episode if you didn't listen, so that will be in the show notes.
(02:37)
Example is noted. I'll handle it when I'm able to, period. Okay? No overexplaining anything. No getting emotional. Keep it to the basics. To the facts. Okay? So the next time your phone lights up with a fake emergency from your least favorite narc, remember, you are not at their beck and call, okay? Your piece is what's important. Your piece is what's urgent, and you decide when and how you engage. Girl, you got your damn power back, right? That's what we're doing here. Shining our crowns, getting our power right? So if you want more scripts or strategies, how to navigate all this stuff, grab my free Boundaries pocket guide as a start, and then if you want to work one-on-one and do customize scripts, customize strategies, that's where the real transformations happen. I always have the ways to work with me one-on-one in my show notes, so check it out.
(03:46)
And you can also join my free Facebook community with other ladies like you. I drop some truth bombs out there and I always put the podcast episodes. Sometimes I'll do some videos. So definitely go join that community. What else? I guess that's it. That's it. It's pretty, this might be my shortest episode ever. How crazy. Wow. Under four minutes. All right, give me a high five through the screen. Give yourself a little queen hug and I'll see you in the next episode. Don't forget to follow this podcast too, and help me help more people. Love.
5 min
March 03 The Letter I’ll Never Send
In this episode, I read the letter I’ll never send — and share what it taught me about self-trust after narcissistic abuse. If you’ve ever felt paralyzed in conversations, questioned your own reactions, or normalized what your body knew wasn’t safe, this one is for you.Your Next Step in Healing
If this episode hit close to home, you may be in the stage where understanding isn’t the problem anymore — your nervous system just needs support integrating safety and clarity.
✨ Calm & Clarity Reset Call
A focused, private session designed to help you regulate, gain perspective, and leave with clear next steps when emotions feel overwhelming or confusing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/calm-and-clarity-reset-call/

3-Month Deep-Dive Container
Focused support to break trauma bonds, rebuild self-trust, and create emotional stability after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Program
For women ready for deeper identity rebuilding, boundary mastery, and long-term nervous system healing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Queens of Peace Mastery
High-level mentorship and integration for lasting transformation and full life reclamation.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Additional Support & Resources
Free Boundaries Pocket Guide
https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts
https://christyjade.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-scripts/
Empowered Boundaries Course
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Free Private Community
https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
TRANSCRIPT
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Have you ever felt paralyzed in a conversation like no matter what you said, it was going to be wrong? Like your body was braced even when things were quote fine. Today's episode is different. I'm going to read something I've never read before. And if you've ever loved someone who slowly made you smaller, this is for you. Welcome to your Thursday Thrive In Five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text you knew better than to reply to. Take a breath queen, this one's for you. Okay. So this episode is going to be a little different. I'm not teaching first, I'm going to read something and it's not about one specific person exactly. It's about a pattern. And if you see yourself in it, I want you to listen all the way through. All right? Here we go. Dear narcissist. I didn't see you at first and that's the part that still gets me.
(01:12)
I didn't see anything that felt overly dangerous. I saw intensity. I saw big emotions. I saw someone who reacted strongly and I told myself that just meant you cared deeply. You told me that meant you cared deeply. I thought the chaos meant passion. I thought the tension meant connection. I thought if I could just communicate better, it will calm down.
(01:48)
What I didn't see was how I was changing. I started feeling paralyzed in conversations and I mean any conversation, not just fights or conflicts. I would rehearse what I was going to say in my head before saying it out loud because somehow I already knew it would be wrong. No matter what I said, it would get twisted. And eventually I stopped trusting my own reactions. I started questioning whether I was even justified in feeling like you were overreacting. Maybe I was too sensitive, like you said. Maybe I did misunderstand like you said. Did I even provoke it?
(02:40)
All things you conditioned me to believe. So instead of holding my ground, I backed off or I overexplained. I took responsibility for things I did not do. I avoided topics that might set you off. Fixing it, fixing us became my role and keeping the peace became my job. And my body was keeping score the whole time. My tight chest, my tight jaw, the constant exhaustion, pure exhaustion, feeling drained all the time. This low grade brace in my nervous system that really never went away, even when I white knuckled through. Even when things were quote fine, especially when things were fine. And to the outside world, to people who maybe got glimpses, "I protected you. I joked about it. I minimized it for myself and for them.
(04:02)
I made it sound dramatic, but normal. I didn't want people to see what I wasn't fully admitting to myself, that this was not just conflict. It was dangerous unpredictability. And that unpredictability, that constant unpredictability does something not just to your mind, but your body. There were moments that did cross lines. Moments my body knew were not safe. And instead of leaving, I normalized them. That's the part that is sometimes hardest to say out loud, that the shame and the guilt, that's where those come from. I normalized what my nervous system was screaming about. And the moment I couldn't unsee it, it wasn't dramatic. It was clarity.
(05:12)
It was realizing that this was not just emotional intensity. It was escalation. That my health mattered, that my peace mattered, that my safety actually mattered. And that protecting you was costing me myself. I didn't cut you out because I hated you. I cut you out because I finally loved myself more than I feared the fallout. I couldn't do it anymore. And once I saw it clearly, I couldn't go back to pretending it was just complicated. You were turmoil. You were chaos, but I am not. And now I don't live braced anymore. I don't twist myself to survive conversations. I don't minimize volatility to keep anyone's peace. And I don't and will not protect people who harm me emotionally or physically.
(06:48)
You don't get to live inside my brain anymore. You don't get to control me. You don't get to control my thoughts. You don't get to control my actions. You have lost that control and I have gained it. And that is freedom. So let me step out of the letter for a minute because if you resonated with that, I want you to understand something. This isn't just my story. That's why I saved some of the specific details. It's a pattern I see in so many women healing from narcissistic abuse. And here's what I want you to hear. If you feel paralyzed in conversations, that is information. Healthy relationships don't make you rehearse basic sentences. If you feel like no matter what you say, it's going to be wrong. That isn't a communication issue. It's a power imbalance.
(08:00)
If you constantly question whether you're justified in your feelings, that's conditioning. And when your words get twisted enough times, you stop trusting your own perception. You start thinking, "Maybe I am too sensitive. Maybe I am overreacting." That self-doubt did not appear out of nowhere. It was trained into you. And your body? Your body's not dramatic. It's a tool we have, right? It's a tool. You get the tight chest, you get the clenched jaw, the exhaustion that I talked about. After simple conversations, daily conversations, repeated daily, weekly conversations that are usually conflict. Your nervous system doesn't lie. So if your body feels unsafe, even if you can't logically prove why, that matters.
(09:05)
And protecting someone who harms you is not loyalty, it's survival. Many of us were taught to smooth things over, minimize, joke about it, protect the other person's image. But the day you stop protecting someone who is hurting you is the day you start protecting yourself. And that's where the healing actually begins. Clarity can feel like grief at first. Once you see it, you can't unsee it, right? But it is also freedom. And if you're in the stage right now where you're starting to see patterns clearly and you feel that mix of grief and strength, it can really be confusing. You don't have to navigate it alone. That is exactly the kind of work that we do inside my Calm and Clarity Reset call. This is my new offer I've been talking about last episode or two. It's just one focused hour to untangle what's happening, regulate your nervous system and get clear on your next step.
(10:27)
It's a soft place to start because you deserve peace that doesn't require survival skills. And it starts with regaining trust in yourself again, which can feel far right now. I get it. I've been there, right? But it is possible. I work with tons of women who start where you are and have amazing transformations. If you want to just jump feet first in, I have three, six, and 12 month programs as well. Or if you want to just take a little nibble and do that calm and clarity reset call, it's a great place to start. Okay? So I hope this helps in some way, maybe just a solidarity, maybe clarity in your own journey.
(11:32)
And maybe it's the push to say, "I want to get unstuck and I deserve more." So if you have any questions too, you can always email me my email and all the links to my programs or working with me one-on-one and a boundaries course. I have all sorts of goodies in my description notes. And the show notes of the podcast should be on the episode descriptions themselves and the main page. And don't forget to follow because this is a long game. It's not as long as you think. I will say that. It's hard to explain, but this healing journey can be quicker than you think, but it's not overnight. We have to be realistic here. We have to go through the process. But one-on-one, my clients will tell you we can have some tears, but we can have some laughs and some good times. And we get great sessions that are mind blowing, really mind-blowing work.
(12:38)
Somatic healing is amazing. If you don't know what it is, it is healing through the body. So we do coaching, narcissistic recovery coaching. Obviously we're doing that kind of talk therapy, et cetera. And then we do these beautiful methods of somatic healing, which is healing through the body because the body often is a little step behind of the brain. You might think something, but your body's still stuck. So we get unstuck in magical ways. Yes. I'm not talking fairy magical. Just to me, it's God magic. I'm a big man upstairs follower. So if you're on that journey too, that is helpful and we can always implement that into it as well. Sometimes we pray. If you are a God person, if you're not, we don't. If you are and we get on that topic, we can infuse a little bit of that Holy Spirit activation in there.
(13:38)
See, there you go. There's the magic. Holy Spirit magic. That'll be my next course. All right. Well, thank you for listening. Thank you for letting me share. I may share more details of my own experience on this podcast, but right now this moment is really for you and this is for just knowing that you're not alone and that there are these patterns and that you do deserve to feel better and to heal better. All right. Don't forget on Thursday, I have Thrive in Five, so we will do a little quicker episode, somatic healing episode or little quick TED Talk or something, whatever comes out of my body. And those are on Thursday. So again, don't forget to follow. And there is a Facebook group. Please join that with women, like- minded women like you. It's a private group, so you don't have to worry about bots and spammers in there, peeping on our stuff.
(14:42)
And yeah, I'm just so excited for you that you landed on my podcast. So welcome if you're new and if you are an oldie book Goodie, thank you for supporting and sticking around and hanging out. And always feel free again to email me with just a hello or any questions or if you want to suggest a topic. All right. Look for all the information in the show notes and I'll see you in the next episode. Bye.
16 min
February 26 Still Missing The Narcissist Today? Do This Instead
Still Missing Them Today? Do This Instead (Thrive in 5)
You thought once you left, the missing would stop. But instead, certain moments still hit — a memory, a song, a quiet night — and suddenly you question yourself again.
In this Thrive in 5 episode, Christy Jade explains why missing a narcissistic partner does not mean you made the wrong decision. What you’re actually grieving isn’t the person — it’s the version of you that existed inside the trauma bond and the future you believed was coming.
You’ll learn how to reinterpret that feeling in real time and use it as a signal to reconnect with yourself instead of looking backward.
If you’ve been caught in obsessive thoughts, emotional pullbacks, or sudden waves of longing after leaving, this episode gives you a grounded, nervous-system-safe way to move through it.
Your Next Step in Healing

✨ Calm & Clarity Reset Call
A focused, private session designed to help you regulate, gain perspective, and leave with clear next steps when emotions feel overwhelming or confusing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/calm-and-clarity-reset-call/

3-Month Deep-Dive Container
Focused support to break trauma bonds, rebuild self-trust, and create emotional stability after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Program
For women ready for deeper identity rebuilding, boundary mastery, and long-term nervous system healing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Free Private Community
00:03):
Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text you knew better than to reply to Take a Breath Queen. This one's for you. Hello queens. If you caught yourself missing them again today or yesterday, hopefully not both. This episode is going to change how you interpret that feeling in the next five minutes. Alright, so quick reset moment. If you listen to my last episode from Tuesday, we talked about how you're not actually missing the narcissist, you're missing something a little deeper. So today I want to give you one powerful practice to use in the exact moment that missing feeling hits, because here is what happens. Your brain labels the feeling as I miss them, but your nervous system is actually saying, I miss familiarity. I miss certainty. I miss who I thought I was becoming. So instead of reaching for the memories, try this pause and ask yourself, what version of me feels far away right now? Not them you.
(01:30)
Maybe it's the hopeful person. Maybe it's the secure version. You remember the woman who felt chosen, the woman who believed life was about to open up there was more coming. That is who your system is grieving. I just had a conversation with a client yesterday about this. You're grieving and here's the reframe that changes everything. Okay? You didn't lose her. Okay? She's not gone. That queen is still in there. She just hasn't fully met the safer environment yet. So when the missing shows up today, don't interpret it as a sign to look backward. Interpret it as a signal to reconnect inward.
(02:35)
A lot of times we look back at these memories and the what ifs and why did I do that? This living in our head, spinning in circles, replaying, wondering, confused all the feelings and the thoughts are exploding in our minds at once. It's time to go inward right into the heart and then take one small action that supports your stability. You need stability right now. We're missing stability, right? So text somebody that you feel safe with, okay? Nobody that has any relation to this person that you don't feel safe with that connection there. Okay? So let's not text their sister today A safe friend. Maybe it's your sibling, maybe it's a coworker that you're very close with. You can go outside, right? Stability. Physically. You can get stability from grounding. There's grounding techniques you can do or just walking. There's something about grounding your body, right?
(03:59)
Regulate your body in some way. Exercise even. I mean, like I said, walking, but even just something simple. Dancing, right? Putting on some fun tunes, shaking a tail feather. Maybe two, do they have two? Tail feather? We're getting weird now. Let's keep going. But regulating your body in some way, moving your body very beneficial and reminding yourself, I'm not going back. I'm coming back to myself. The authentic self. I refer to this as that solid gold block we're all born with and no matter who we are, narcissistic abuse or not, a lot of shit kind of covers up that solid gold block. That's the authentic us. That's in a way our higher self, our highest self that we can be and not trying to be like, oh, let's achieve this. I'm not in that way. It is our unique golden, beautiful self that we desire to feel like that loves ourself, that feels confident, that feels secure, feels safe, all of those things.
(05:23)
And you're coming back to that. And healing isn't about forgetting them. It's not about them. I want to reiterate that it's not about forgetting them, it's about remembering you and who you truly are. And you may I get it. I can hear you from here. Some of you saying, I don't even know who that is. I don't remember who she is. That's where I come in. Or your therapist comes in. You can do work on your own. There's a lot of different methodologies that you can use. Somatic healing is amazing. If you didn't, here, I have a couple of spots open. Now I'm going to start opening these for two people every month I'm going to do one-off sessions. Usually I don't do one-off sessions really anymore unless someone pops up from an old episode where I did offer them, or now, right now I am offering some really special one-off sessions.
(06:42)
They're my clarity and calm sessions. If you need a nervous system, wind down, kind of feel like you even just need a next step. Maybe it's the next step in. How do I even try to figure out who I am? What does that even look like? If you find yourself saying, what does that look like? That's where we can work together and we have one session zoom call. We'll do a little coaching, maybe a little somatic healing in that body and get you ready for that next step and then that if you want to, you can continue with me into one of my programs that are three, six, or 12 months. And those are deep transformative programs. But even just that one session will give you some clarity and some calm. That's why I call it that because I'm a basic B, because I know some people, maybe you don't have it in you to commit. Maybe you don't have the finances to commit. That's okay. Just getting a little clarity can go a long way and help you feel better right now and know what direction to head in. So if you're interested in that at any of my programs, including the calm, clarity and calm call, say that five times fast. That is always in my show notes. Any of my offers are in there. I have a boundaries course. That's amazing. Really good.
(08:22)
Well, it drips every week and then you have it for the rest of your life. You can look at my face for the rest of your life. Yes, it's videos. So that's 10 videos. It's really good stuff. I'm very biased and I have a couple freebies too. I have a little boundaries pocket guide. It's adorable and fun and I don't know, I don't remember what's listed as far as the freebies. And there's the Facebook community, which is, it's getting more engagement in there. So join now while people are talking to each other because you guys leaning on each other. First of all, it makes me so happy to peep in there and be like, oh, they're talking to each other and encouraging each other and going like, girl, me too. I love that. We need that when we're in the situation. So look for that support.
(09:12)
It's a private group, so not going to have any creep opioids in there. Everyone, you got to answer questions too. So yes, you do have to answer questions and give me your email so I know you're a real human. And so it is a women's only Facebook group. It's private, and you get to chat with other women that have gone through or are going through what you are, right? It's always nice to have that support. So definitely look in the show notes for all the information. You can email me too if you have any questions about my programs. My email is in there as well. And yeah, that's about it. It's nine 15. Here it is, nine 15. You know what? I'm a tired little lady. I don't know why I love recording my podcasts at night. Sometimes I've time during the day and I'm like, Hmm, I'll do it tonight.
(10:09)
I'm very much a night owl. Do I have any night owls out there? Is that trauma? Do we have trauma night owl syndrome? No. That, I swear it runs in my family. My mom is a super night owl. She now naps during the day, but she's always been a night owl. I will say while she was single parenting us, sometimes she'd pass out on the couch though after dinner because that woman did a lot. Shout out to the single moms of the world. You are super, super people, super moms. And then my grandma was very much a night owl. I remember in my twenties, this is when I don't know how, I know my audience ranges in age. So this is going to age us older women here. But when the Kylie Jenners, not Kylie, what was the other one? What's the, oh my gosh, I can't even remember now.
(11:11)
Kylie is so big. I can't even, she's overshadowing her sister. But all the Kardashians, yes, whatever K word, Kardashian. The Kardashians show I think had just started or something. But I remember being up with my grandma. I live outside of DC and I would go up to New York to visit my grandma at Christmas time. I'd stay there a little extra. My mom would come home here and sometimes I'd stay. So I was staying with my grandma and she loved tea and s m's, coffee cake and rest in peace. My grandma passed in 2020. I just adored her. So we would sit up every night so late. I loved it. Let me have caffeinated tea in the middle of the night. Well, I was having an monds caffeinated tea. No wonder she was a night owl. And we would stay up till like three. I remember once it was four in the morning and I was like, my grandma's such a badass.
(12:15)
And we were watching this, I think it was the Kardashians, and I feel like Donna Versace was on it. She didn't know who the Kardashians are. She's like, what is this shit? And then she's like, is that Donatella? She knew her. I don't know. Crazy weird memories just popping through my head and I'm sharing it with you. I feel like I need to connect with you guys more on a more real level too. I'm always just so excited and I don't want to make my episodes too long, so I try to just keep it very focused, but I feel like I'm not very focused, and I want you to see that A, and also share a little bit about me so you can get a little more familiar with who I am. And then I would love to know more about you pop in. I have people say hi in my emails.
(13:05)
Say hello, introduce yourself. I get emails sometimes that make me so happy that are just people saying, Hey, I binged your podcast episodes and they've helped me so much, X, Y, Z, and tell me their stories. And I love that stuff, you guys. So if you just ever want to share, I appreciate it so much because it helps me know that I'm truly impacting and helping people, which is obviously my purpose here. And it's just so cool to get to know all of you. Sometimes we'll have a couple back and forth emails. So I read every single email. That might not be the case forever as I get more and more and my numbers grow, which is very exciting and I love that. But that does mean eventually I won't be able to keep up with the volume. But right now I can and I love it.
(14:02)
So yeah, I guess that's it. I'm really excited for spring to come. I am a warm weather person, so I'm really, really excited for that. DC has been way colder than usual. It's been a snowy ass cold winter, which I mean that should be, but I'm not here for it. So I'm so excited. It's going to be 60 whole degrees later this week, and you would think that means it's like 80. I'm like, oh my God, it's the best. So excited. I'm going to cry outside and just dance naked. That'd be weird. Neighbors might not like it. So I guess it, I'll end on that cutesy note, right? And you guys take these words today, right? Remember, first of all, everything's going to be okay. I know it. Don't feel that way. Can I just put that out there? Just hear me. Everything's going to be okay.
(14:57)
It might take time. You might need to do a little work, but you're a capable queen, so of course you're going to be able to do that, okay? And you're not going back. You're coming back to your self, that solid gold piece of hunk, of chunk of burning love gold inside your body. We're just dusting off all the crap that I think I forgot to finish the sentence back earlier, now that I think of it. When I was saying we have this solid gold block, I side tangent, but I always view it as society. Other people, no matter what abuse or not, we get all this stuff that just covers up and causes us insecurities, or especially with social media, there's so much and they become a little different version of ourselves. So we're trying to get back to that solid gold, authentic block of gorgeousness that deserves the world and deserves to feel confident and good about yourself and deserves love and to feel worthy. So I want you to say, repeat after me if you so dare. I am worthy.
(16:11)
I am loved. I'm a queen. Yeah, you are. You look good in that gold crown. Girl. You look so good. All right. I'm going to stop being creepy myself over here and don't forget to follow. So you get all my episodes. I mean, how much more fun is life with my podcast, huh? It's fun, right guys? I mean, not fun stuff we have to deal with, but I try to make it as fun as I can for you and I do. Honestly, joking aside, please reach out if you just want to share your story or have a question. Okay? I will see you in the next episode. Have a fabulous rest of your week. Bye.
18 min
February 24 You’re Not Missing the Narcissist You’re Missing This (And It Changes Everything)
If you’ve left a narcissistic or emotionally abusive relationship but still find yourself thinking about them, questioning your progress, or feeling pulled backward emotionally — this episode will bring powerful clarity.
You’re not actually missing the narcissist. In this episode, Christy explains why calm can feel uncomfortable after narcissistic abuse, how trauma bonding conditions the brain and body, and what’s really happening when memories or longing resurface.
This conversation will help you release shame, understand your healing process, and begin retraining your body to feel safe in peace again.
Your Next Step in Healing
If this episode hit close to home, you may be in the stage where understanding isn’t the problem anymore — your nervous system just needs support integrating safety and clarity.
✨ Calm & Clarity Reset Call
A focused, private session designed to help you regulate, gain perspective, and leave with clear next steps when emotions feel overwhelming or confusing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/calm-and-clarity-reset-call/

3-Month Deep-Dive Container
Focused support to break trauma bonds, rebuild self-trust, and create emotional stability after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Program
For women ready for deeper identity rebuilding, boundary mastery, and long-term nervous system healing.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Free Private Community
00:00):
Hello Queens. Have you ever caught yourself thinking about them and then immediately getting mad at yourself afterwards? Why am I still thinking about this person I left? I know who they are, I know what they did. So why does part of me still feel pulled back today? I want to gently flip something upside down for you because you're not actually missing the narcissist, you're missing something else. And once you understand this, a lot of shame is going to go, we don't like shame in this room. No we don't. Welcome to your Thursday. Thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting and that text you knew better than to reply to Take a breath Queen. This one's for you.
(00:53)
Alright, so welcome back to Narcissistic Abuse Recovery. I'm Christie, as many of you know, if not welcome, thanks for showing up. And if you're here today, I already know something about you. You're not where you used to be, right? You've learned, you've woken up, maybe you left. Maybe you're emotionally detaching, maybe and trying to stay grounded, but there's still this confusing moment that happens sometimes, right? You're doing better and out of nowhere a memory hits or you wonder what they're doing. Or your body feels heavy, chest tight, maybe you feel a little nostalgia, right? And then the second wave after that is guilt or shame around that. What is wrong with me? Why do I still miss them? This doesn't make sense. So what we're going to talk about today is what's actually happening because this moment right here is one of the most misunderstood parts of healing.
(02:00)
Alright? So here's the truth. Most people never explain. You're not missing the narcissist. I repeat. You are not missing the narcissist. Isn't that? That's like a relief, but you're not so sure yet are you are missing what your nervous system learned to expect while you were surviving them. They're two very, very different things. So when you were in that relationship, your brain and your body, that's the somatic healing we talk about. Adapted. In order to keep you safe, you learn to scan their moods. Remember that Not so fun. You learn to anticipate their reactions. You learned how to fix any fixers out there? Yeah, I see you, I see all of you. You learn to soften to manage them if you know and to do whatever you could to prevent the explosions before they happened. So your body was constantly on alert. So here's the part that surprises people.
(03:10)
That constant emotional intensity created chemistry. So high stress, that high, high, high chaos followed by relief. The conflict followed by moments of calm or reflection, maybe even got fake apologies or flowers or just calm. It could have just been calm where it wasn't chaos. And that's good enough for us, not really, or fear followed by reassurance. So that cycle releases powerful, neurochemicals, adrenaline, cortisol. You've probably heard all the things about cortisol, dopamine probably heard that. These are like buzzwords nowadays, right? But they're real. And that cycle releases them. It's like the storm before the calm. So even though it was painful, it became very familiar. I would almost call it comfortable because it was so familiar. And the nervous system loves familiarity more than it loves happiness. Do you know that? I'm going to repeat that one again. Your nervous system actually loves familiarity more than happiness.
(04:31)
Okay? Your nervous system chooses familiar before it chooses peace. We're going to break that cycle though. We're going to break it. We don't like that. We want peace. Who wants peace? Can I get an amen? Yes. Okay, good. So when you actually leave or when you detach emotionally, something strange happens. Life gets quieter and logically that's good. You're like, yeah, this is what's supposed to happen. But your body is going, wait, why is it so calm here? Are we actually safe? I don't feel safe because calm used to mean something bad was about to happen. Let that one sink in. Calm used to mean something bad was about to happen. Calm before the storm. Silence used to mean tension was building. You knew when it was silent. It's like when there's a toddler and it's way too quiet. And then you go in the room and it's like there's marker all over the wall and glue on the seat, right?
(05:39)
Silence with a arc. When the intention was building, there's a cycle. There is the abuse cycle. And during that cycle, what happens before it's the calm, before the storm there's love bombing or there's convincing you everything's fine. Maybe there's some quiet and then maybe boom. So peace to you feels unfamiliar. And unfamiliar can feel very unsafe in our bodies. So your brain tries to solve that discomfort. The only way it knows how, it brings your attention back to the person connected to that old pattern. And that's not because you want them and miss them in the way you're thinking. That's why you're missing is confusing because it's not how you actually miss maybe someone you have in your life that is a healthy connection. Your body is trying to return to what it recognizes. That's all what it's been conditioned, right? What confusingly felt familiar slash safe, but not safe in the sense of the word as we really know it and want it to be.
(06:51)
So this is where so many women judge themselves, they think missing thoughts mean they made the wrong decision. They think healing should feel like just instant freedom. But what's actually happening is it's a detox. You are detoxing from survival mode. You're teaching a nervous system that learned chaos, how to live in peace. It takes time. This is not a little switch flip, so let's reframe it a little bit. You're not craving the relationship in the way that a normal relationship would be craved or if you break up and there were lots of great qualities and this and that, and you miss the person. This is different. You're grieving the familiarity. You're releasing a role that you had to play for a long time. This was part of your identity, right? The fixer, the peacemaker, the emotional manager. You were busy girl, you were really busy and oh, I do want to say, and boy and man, I have found out I have more men followers than I thought I did.
(08:09)
So shout out to all of you too. And it sucks just as much for you guys and you can be my kings, okay? But when that role disappears, king or queen, there is space. A space can feel really uncomfortable before it feels freeing. Okay? And that doesn't mean you're going backward. I just had this conversation with one of my clients actually, it doesn't mean you're going backward, it means your healing is actually working. Okay? So that's the good news. That is the good news. That discomfort just means you're recalibrating. So here's something you can do the next time, a memory or longing hits. Instead of asking why do I miss them? Pause and ask, what does my body need right now? And then orient yourself. Do you guys know Orient yet? If you've been a long time follower, you probably do. If not, you are about to learn a little tool that elementary kids can learn. My daughter does it herself. It's a great, great way to calm your nervous system and it's easy and it's fast and it's fabulous. Okay, look around the room slowly. Name three things you can see. I love to do examples. So what's in my home? The gnome in the corner, of course I have a gnome, the basket with my dog's leash in it and my smart water to make me smart.
(09:46)
So you name three things. Feel your feet on the ground. If they're not on the ground, put 'em on the ground. Or I kindly ask you to place your feet on the ground if it's comfortable for you. Lexie, I'm being gentle. Alright? And then let your shoulders drop just a little. So we're looking around, we're grounding ourselves with our feet, letting our shoulders drop and just taking a nice inhale through the nose and out the mouth. My favorite halo breath, it's called, you're teaching your nervous system a new message. I am safe without chaos. And every time you do this, you weaken that old attachment. Not through force, but real safety, not the fake safety that it has with that narc. Okay, that was fake news, safety. So if this episode hit you today, I want you to know something very important. This stage, this confusing middle ground is where the real healing happens.
(10:55)
Not when you realize the truth, not when you first leave, which we would love it to be that way, believe me. But when your body starts learning, that peace is allowed. Now it's huge and it's also a stage we're where support can make a very, very big difference because understanding is powerful, but regulation is what creates that lasting change. So I actually am offering new one-off sessions. I'm only doing a couple this month. I'm going to do a couple every month just for those of you who need quick support are not looking for ongoing and really want to just get the next step and a somatic tool to go a little to go package. Let's talk about it that way. A little to go package something that we will have an hour long zoom call one-on-one with yours truly. And I will hear you out for a few minutes.
(12:00)
See what we're working with. We'll do a little somatic exercise depending on what it is, and a little coaching with a next step and knowing what you need to do next. So if ongoing support is not what you're looking for or can afford right now, this might be a good solution for you to just feel a little better, get a little settled. This my clarity and calm sessions, my resets. So that link along with my ongoing support will all be in the show notes. And if you want to email me, ask me any questions, my email is in there as well. And until next time, remember, you're not broken, you're not weak, okay? You're not missing them. No ma'am. You're learning how to feel safe before being yourself again, basically, until it all comes together. And it takes a minute. So don't forget to follow wherever you are on the podcast, whatever podcast platform.
(13:10)
Follow me. Say you don't miss my episodes. I have two a week. Tuesdays and Thursdays and Thursdays are my thrive in fives, I call 'em. And they are just a little somatic fun. Five to 10 minutes, little bits that you can save for moments where you're feeling a little want, want not at peace, which we all have. They're useful really to anybody. And what else? Oh, you can join my Facebook group for Queens just like you, just you going through what you're going through. So join that group and that is also in the show notes, the link to sign up for that. It's private. So don't worry about that. Don't worry about all the narcs coming in and spying on us, okay? They can't get in. It's a narc free zone. Alright, you guys have a great rest of your week until Thursday, because come back Thursday for some more goodies and yeah, love you. Bye.
Contact: [email protected]
15 min
February 19 The 30-Second Shift That Stops Narcissist Triggers Fast
You can understand narcissistic abuse intellectually and still feel your body react instantly when they reach out. That doesn’t mean you’re stuck — it means your nervous system hasn’t learned safety yet.
In this Thrive in 5, Christy shares a simple, powerful reset you can use in real time when you feel triggered, flooded, or pulled back into old emotional patterns. This short practice helps interrupt the automatic reaction cycle and teaches your body that you don’t have to perform, explain, or fix anything to stay safe.
If you’ve been looking for a small but powerful shift to help your healing actually stick, this episode gives you one you can start using today.
Your Next Step in Healing
If you’re ready to move beyond awareness and start creating real emotional freedom, deeper support can help you practice these shifts in real life — not just understand them.
Work With Me — Coaching Containers
3-Month Transformational Coaching (Deep Reset & Momentum)
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Queens of Peace Program (Deep Pattern Healing & Rebuild)
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Queens of Peace Program (Full Identity & Life Transformation)
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Get My Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts
Scripts that help you shut down manipulation, stop JADE-ing, and communicate with confidence.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-fast-37/
Grab the Boundaries Pocket Guide (Free!)
Your quick-start guide to setting boundaries without guilt.
https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Join the Facebook Community
Connect with other women healing from narcissistic abuse
https://www.facebook.com/groups/2420729361374989
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text, you knew better than to reply to take a breath Queen, this one's for you. Have you ever walked away from an interaction thinking, I stayed calm. I didn't take the bait. As Christie Jade always says, so why do I still feel shaken? Like your body's buzzing. Your mind won't stop replaying it, and somehow they're still in your head. Maybe hours later today I want to talk about why that happens, because it's not a lack of healing. So a lot of women think if I were really healed, I wouldn't react anymore. But healing from narcissistic abuse specifically doesn't start in your thoughts. It starts in your nervous system, all the fun. So your nervous system learned survival long before you learned boundaries, right? That's why you ended up having to learn about boundaries and hopefully setting some at this point, but maybe still not quite knowing how or knowing how to stick to them or handle backlash from them, all of that, right?
(01:25)
But here's what's really happening. So when you were in that dynamic with the narcissist, you body was trained to stay on alert. Unpredictability teaches your brain what? Stay ready, fix it fast, prevent the explosion. We know all about that escalation. So now, even when you may logically understand what they're doing, logically, I say that because, and let's be honest, even logically it doesn't always make sense, but logically, you can kind of explain it away. Your body still reads them as a threat. So that reaction you feel, it's not emotional weakness, it's conditioning. It's what you have been conditioned to feel by the entire situation. So this is why you can prepare the perfect response. Tell yourself, I'm not going to engage. And then one text comes in, and suddenly you have that sinking heart feeling, right? I know you know that feeling right? That heart drops, and it's not even exactly like, oh, you care what they think. Maybe anymore, maybe you used to. But even if you've stretched away from that feeling, it's because your body remembers what used to happen next.
(03:01)
Let that sink in. Your body remembers what used to happen next when you were closer with them, when you were living with them. And I know some of you may be listening that you're still in the situation. Most of my followers, most of my clients are away from the situation, or they may not live with the person if it's someone in their family, like a parent. But you could look at that. If it's a parent, right? When you live with them as a child, you're now still your body, still remembering what used to happen after you. Whatever way you weren't good enough or didn't do it right, or didn't do exactly what they wanted, how they wanted, even though it wasn't reasonable. Same thing if you were in a romantic situation with someone living with them. Same thing where your body is remembering what used to happen next.
(04:02)
So here's the shift. I would love you to try this week. Stop trying to win the interaction. We often can go to the other side of the pendulum. We feel like we've lost for so long that we just want to get these wins. What you need to do is start, which is a win, but it doesn't feel as satisfactory as a full win. But I'm going to tell you in the end what wins is peace. So start regulating yourself instead. You're not going to win as far as getting them to say what you want or do what you want, especially all the time, right? Occasionally, if they're desperate for something, they might give you a little carrot. But talking about for true healing, you have to stop trying to control them and trying to control the situation. Because really what you need to do is control yourself. Regulate yourself instead. So when you feel that surge, that heart, drop that spiraling out in the brain, any of that pause, and then put your feet on the ground. Take one slow breath. I love my halo breath. So in through the nose and out through the mouth. So you're inhaling. Two seconds, exhaling three to four seconds. Always exhaling a little more than you're inhaling. Please don't turn blue and pass out on me. Okay? If you need to just do two and two, that's fine.
(05:47)
We want this to be a calmer, not a passer outer. So you take in one exhale, one many seconds that looks to you, that's comfortable, and let your shoulders drop. Let your jaw loosen. So in those moments, and this takes a little training, you don't get it right the first time. That's fine. Look, we're all still growing. We're all still learning this. This is not an overnight shift, but the next time you catch yourself where you're able to do it, say, oh, yay, I get a gold coin to match my gold ground. Alright? So you're cheating your nervous something, nervous system, something new now, which is I don't have to react to stay safe anymore, right before to stay safe. What did that look like? That looked like, I mean, first of all, even I'm just picturing our body language, just like the hunch. You know what I'm talking about, that sinking into yourself, you feel that heart sink, your body collapses into itself. You're like maybe a dog between the tail, between its legs, this kind of, okay, oh no, I got to shrink because I don't want the explosion.
(07:10)
What else could that overexplaining ourselves? Right? So there's that. Oh, no, but I didn't mean to, no, that's not what I meant to do. That's not what I was saying, right? All of that, that urgency to fix, that urgency to make everything right, that weight on your shoulders, it is your responsibility to fix this because they have conditioned you that way. We actually are out of that situation. Now, if you are, I hope you are. If not, we got to get out of that. We got to get out of that situation. No one should let you feel like that, right? But I don't have to react to stay safe anymore, and that's where that detachment actually begins. And you could write that on a post-it note. Put it on your mirror, put it on your forehead, wherever you'll see it. I don't have to react to stay safe anymore. We've been conditioned to react in some way, whether that reaction could be very submissive, that reaction could be fighting for our lives.
(08:27)
So you're not behind in healing. I know a lot of you, so many of my clients are like, oh, no, it had an effect on me. It's a transition time. It's not overnight that it's not going to have an effect. This is the transition to I'm of, Hey, something has maybe triggered me or given me that visceral reaction, and you know what I'm going to do with that? I'm going to not sucked into it. I'm going to talk to myself and remind myself I don't have to react. I don't have to do what they want just because I'm conditioned to do what they want.
(09:11)
I don't have to react to stay safe anymore. I am safe. I am safe. I'm safe. I feel like screaming it on the mountaintop. Okay? So you are unwinding survival patterns that took years to build, right? So once you have this light bulb and it's like, oh, they're a narcissist. You kind of figure that out. You understand that more. Then you start to go, okay, well, I shouldn't react to this. I'm out of this situation, and why can't I just move on? Why can't I get unstuck? Why can't I look like him in his happy little bubble life? First of all, he's full of shit. He's not happy. Or whoever your narc is, they're not happy. That's a whole other episode. Actually, that's a good episode. I should dive into that. And I have this conversation with my clients a lot, right? Because it's almost like, not a jealousy, but a, how are they so fine?
(10:10)
Let's say if it's your ex, how are they doing so well? Why are they so happy? Why are they having no problem? Their whole life is a problem. Again, that's another episode I definitely will be doing because I love that topic now, but your job isn't to worry about them or compare yourself to realize you are human. And this took a long time, most likely for some longer than others, meaning you've been in it longer. It probably didn't take super long. I mean, they're good at what they do, so they get you in. Didn't take 'em super long to love bomb you and get you under their spell. But it did take a while, right? They slowly got into your head, manipulated, confused, you, deflected onto you, lied to you, maybe cheated on you, maybe abused you emotionally, mentally, financially. There's a lot here. So you're not going to look at your post-it and repeat it three times and be like, I'm healed, mama.
(11:24)
No, but it can be a quicker process than you think once you actually do that deeper healing. And of course, that's what I'm here to handhold you through. The one-on-one sessions that are so important, this work, this somatic healing. If you don't know what somatic is it, it's the body, right? So we do the coaching, right? Some clients want to understand narcissism more and how they got there and how to trust. Again, all of that stuff, all the mind stuff, the logical stuff, the situational stuff, the customized coaching on that level. And then there's the somatic healing, which I mean, it's all great to me. I love all this work. But the somatic healing, there is something truly magical about it where your body remembers everything. Your body holds onto this stuff. Your body's a little behind the brain and the mind and your nervous system is going, I'm still not feeling safe.
(12:30)
I'm stuck. So your mind may not be completely stuck, but your nervous system is. So that can then trigger the mind to feel stuck and start replaying because it's going, wait, but my body's saying I'm not safe, so something's wrong, so I'm going to start spiraling. So it's this awful cycle. So we need to help the body too. In parallel. The body is this important piece that a lot of people really don't give enough credit to in healing. So that's my job to help both of those pieces of you. And we have the spiritual part too. I am a God person. I will always ask permission, but we can bring God in. We can bring prayer in if you're a God person too. But the somatic healing is mind blowing work. And what does that look like? We go on, I call 'em Soul Cas, okay?
(13:26)
We go on little Soul Cas in our one-on-one sessions. We do these once a week, and I have three programs. Please go check them out in the show notes, and you can read more in depth about them. But this is mind blowing work that will change your life, right? It's transformational. All my clients who have done it have had improvement in their life, some who have been with me a year. It is unrecognizable in a good way. I mean, they're them, but even more confident, they finally trust themselves. They're dating again, people who came in saying, I will never date again. I have no idea how I would ever trust anyone are out there now dating, feeling freedom, feeling confident, having a whole new career. I can't tell you just the impact that all of this stuff, when someone conditions you in these ways and smacks you down how it affects your entire life.
(14:29)
So it is so cool for me to help people through that transformation. It's just mind blowing, all of it, all of it. So sorry, I get so excited about it. So if you're interested in working, this is for somebody, the people, the women who are ready, who are ready to say, yeah, I am ready to do this work. I don't want to feel this way. I want to get unstuck, and I would love to carve out an hour a week. This is for people who aren't great, also at the self-care, at the carving, the timeout that do everything for everybody else, or they're used to that. People pleasers moms who just, it's hard to get even an hour away this hour. There's so much built into this hour that it feels like you get hours work worth of work. I'll say that. That's a good way to put it in one hour, but we try and make it fun too.
(15:34)
I mean, I'm Christie, so it's also fun. It's a little bit fun. I mean, I think it's a lot bit fun. I hate that it's related to this stuff, obviously, that we have to heal from. But yes, I do, of course, try to make it also light. You're not going to go out of the session weeping. We are going to make sure I am trained with trauma informed, which means I have been certified and trained how to make sure we're not going to re-trigger you and send you into some black abyss. You're in good hands, and we're going to help you at the end of the session. You will feel better and delighter and have definitely done some healing. So I'm excited about you being able to start this new chapter in your life. So if you are on board, if you are ready, again, all the information is in the show notes.
(16:32)
You can email me. My email is in there. If you have any questions at all, it's fierce Mama C at Gmail. What else? We have a Facebook group. Yes, we do. Queens Little Queen Facebook group for women just like you. And there are questions you have to answer because I want to make sure you're not a bot and that it is a sacred, safe place for all of you. So please answer those, or I will not let you in. That's just one of the rules. So what else? I guess that's it. If you didn't hear my episode on Tuesday, there's a full rundown on this topic, so you can listen to that or watch it on YouTube. I'm going to post both of these probably tonight on YouTube. Sometimes I'm a little later posting on YouTube, so sometimes they'll go up on Thursdays. But yes, I have a little YouTube channel.
(17:23)
If you want to see my face today. I don't think I have a, Nope, not a stitch of makeup on. So it's naked baby face today, but maybe you've seen worse. Maybe not. I don't know. You'll have to look and see. But if you are just on audio, I love you. Let's end with some beautiful affirmations. All right. Repeat after me. Hands over your heart unless you're driving. Then please keep them on the wheel and just listen. Don't close your eyes. All right? But those of you who are in a safe space to do so, close your eyes, hands on heart. Let's take a nice inhale through the nose, that halo breath breathing out. All right, I am safe. I am ready because I'm a queen. That's right. Yes, you are queen. All right, I will see you in the next episode next Tuesday. Don't forget to follow also on whatever platform you are listening or watching this. Make sure to follow so you don't miss any episodes because there's tons of 'em. Alright, have a great one. Love you. Bye.
19 min
February 17The 3 Reasons You Still React to a Narcissist (and How to Stop)
The 3 Reasons You Still React to a Narcissist (Even When You Know Better)
You’ve learned the patterns. You understand narcissistic behavior. And yet — you still find yourself reacting, explaining, defending, or feeling emotionally pulled back in. This episode breaks down why that happens and why it has nothing to do with weakness or lack of healing. Christy explains the nervous-system and psychological reasons survivors continue to react, and how awareness alone isn’t enough to change the pattern. If you’ve ever left an interaction thinking, “Why did that still affect me?” — this episode will bring clarity and relief.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why trauma bonding keeps your brain hooked even after separation
How nervous system conditioning overrides logic in real time
The hidden emotional triggers narcissists activate — often without words
The shift that helps you move from reaction → regulation → response
Your Next Step in Healing
If you’re ready to stop overthinking interactions and start feeling calm, clear, and grounded again, deeper support can help you retrain both mindset and nervous system responses.
3-Month Transformational Coaching (Deep-Dive Support)
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
Focused, high-support coaching to help you stabilize emotionally, implement boundaries, and break reactive patterns.
6-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
For women ready to fully rebuild self-trust, confidence, and emotional safety.
12-Month Queens of Peace Coaching Container
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
Long-term transformation and identity rebuilding after narcissistic abuse.
Additional Support & Resources
Boundaries Pocket Guide (Free): https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
Copy-Paste-Peace Scripts: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/copy-paste-peace-fast-37/
Empowered Boundaries Course: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
Free Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
Contact: https://christyjade.podbean.com/e/ep-5-the-grey-rock-method-how-to-disconnect-from-narcissistic-abusers/

TRANSCRIPT:
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So you understand narcissistic behavior now or at least way more than you used to. You see the manipulation, you see the patterns you promised yourself, you will not get pulled in again. And then one message shows up and suddenly your heart is racing. You're explaining yourself again, and afterward you're wondering, why am I still reacting like this? Today we're going to talk about why that happens and why it does not mean you are failing at healing. Okay? Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting, and that text you knew better than to reply to take a breath Queen. This one's for you.
(00:51)
Hello queen. Welcome back to Narcissistic Abuse Recovery with Christy Jade. Alright, so I want to start first with something that I hear constantly, and maybe you've said this to yourself too. I know what they're doing. So why does it still affect me? Because there's this strange phase in healing where your awareness wakes up, but your nervous system is still lagging. It's still not caught up, and this is very, very normal. So I want you to know that first of all, right, your mind understands what happened, but your body, that nervous system, all the things still reacts like it is happening now. Basically it's stuck, and I get that word so much from my clients, I feel stuck. So the text comes in, your stomach drops, you feel pressure to respond immediately. That urgency, oh, I'm familiar, I remember that guy. Do not miss urgency. And you start mentally defending yourself before you've even unlocked your phone and afterwards, then comes the shame.
(02:04)
I should be past this. So today I want to walk you through something very gently, well, as queen gently as I can be, right? Because there are really three things happening underneath these reactions, and once you see them, you will stop blaming yourself. Well, that is my goal here. Okay, so reason one, your body still thinks you are in danger. When you lived inside these narcissistic dynamics, your nervous system adapted to survive the unpredictability. This is something that is not normal. It's not what most people have to go through in life, this unpredictable, unsafe feeling all the time. So you learn to respond quickly, explain fast, fix tension before it actually escalated. Not you were weak, but because your brain was protecting you, right? Your subconscious. So now when that person reaches out, your body reacts before logic has time to step in. Your heart speeds up your thoughts, race desperately trying to figure out what to do, even though a lot of times we've been through this over and over and you feel that urgency again, urgency is my enemy.
(03:32)
I still have some residual, and this is just a little side note, I'll get back in a second, but my a DD creeps in a side note of urgency that can be created even though I have healed so much and comes so far, and I don't feel that urgency to, especially those people that I know longer have relationship with or other similar toxic personalities that come along that treat people like that can try to condition you to feel like everything's urgent even though I don't have that. When you've been conditioned like that for a long time, especially if you grew up with it in your family, childhood, it's a long-term thing. You can develop just an urgency in general, which I've gotten rid of, but not totally all the way. So when I say we're still healing, we're always healing. No one in the world is always ever healed.
(04:28)
We're all on our different paths. I want to be very transparent. I have come so far and I am a completely different person in a fabulous way of who I used to be as far as narcissistic abuse recovery goes, but there's still some things in life that we still have to work on, and sometimes I'll get these little dings of this just urgency because it was so conditioned in my nature. So anyway, we're going to go back to what we're talking about here, but you might be able to relate to that, and I just want to be honest with you guys, so it's not like I know a lot of you will say you feel behind. Well, guess what? There is no behind. We're all always healing. So this urgency creates reaction and you're not reacting to this specific moment. Your nervous system is reacting to what it remembers, everything it remembers. And healing begins when the moment that you realize this is not a character flaw, it's just conditioning. So sometimes the most powerful change is simply pausing and shining a light on it, not answering right away, letting your body catch up to reality before your fingers start typing and you start explaining Overexplaining, can we be real?
(06:04)
I mean, there's so many different reactions we have with narcissists that we've been conditioned to do the overexplaining and just this trying to get the right word because you don't want to escalate and then you're like, well, maybe I shouldn't. There's back and forth in your own head and then it's too late. You already sent this message. So a lot of power comes in pausing and not answering right away, if at all. Do you have to answer? It depends right? With someone. You have to, and there's so many episodes I have on this type of stuff. Gray Rock Method episode is a really good place to start, but don't take the bait, don't get emotional. Keep it simple, keep it short, keep it factual. These are all tips in there. So not answering right away and also go listen to that episode and let your body catch up with reality before you actually start responding.
(07:06)
It is a great, fantastic idea when you get, first of all, you don't even need to read it right away unless it's like they have your child for the weekend. It could be an emergency, right? If not, you don't have to read it right away. Even the urgency is made up. It's bullshit. They conditioned us to feel, okay? So unless it's involving your child in the moment, it's not an emergency. They can wait and you can get your thoughts together to think of how you can stay in your power and your peace and respond with no emotion and no extra information for them either. That is a big tip. Don't let them have extra information that they can use against you. Okay? So reason two, you're still communicating. This is a healthy relationship. Most survivors keep reacting because they're still trying to communicate normally. So you're trying to clarify, you're trying to be fair as you would with anyone.
(08:07)
You're trying to be the bigger person in a way. We talked about this a little bit last week. You're trying to be understood. Can I tell you one of our biggest triggers as narcissist, abuse, recover, or survivors is being misunderstood. Anyone out there? Yeah. Is that true? I know it's true For me, one of my Achilles was being misunderstood. Now you misunderstand me. That's on you. B, bye-bye. Not my shit. Hashtag not my shit. Okay? But that is something that can definitely be a trigger. So when we feel like we're being misunderstood, which they'll purposely misunderstand you or pretend they are misunderstanding you, we go into, oh no, I have to make sure. So now I have to what? Over. Explain. Okay.
(08:58)
Healthy relationships resolve through communication. So we think, oh, if I communicate I can make this better. That's what we should think. If we're in a healthy relationship, we should think, oh, well I need to talk about this. We need to work through this. We can get through this together, but we're not in a healthy relationship even if we're outside the relationship, we are technically in relationship with this person. If we're in communication with them, which I know a lot of you are, especially when you are co-parenting or trying to figure out what to do in a relationship or getting out of it. Sometimes we're out of it, but we still have a little strings attached and if you're there, run, no, I'm just kidding. Alright, but narcissistic dynamics, they don't calm through understanding. They continue through engagement. So what does that mean? They don't get calmer through understanding.
(09:59)
Why? Because again, this isn't a healthy individual who's receiving your information like a healthy individual would, right? So it's just continuing engagement and that's what they want, and they want you to take the bait so they can gain more control of you and confuse you and manipulate you more. So then every explanation gives more material for them, right? I was saying you don't want them to have more material, more ammo against you. Every defense keeps that emotional loop alive and they love that. They love to get emotions out of you, good or bad, they don't care. And this realization can be freeing and heartbreaking at the same time. When you realize all this stuff, I was just talking to a client this week about this, it can be devastating that all of this is going on, but once you accept it, so the hard part is realizing it. Let's put it this way, the hard part is realizing it. The freeing part is accepting it.
(11:11)
Okay? Should I say that again? The hard part is realizing it very difficult. You might not even be able to do it overnight. It might be a couple weeks to really soak in when you start to really understand the mind of a narcissist, but the freedom in it, the power in it comes from accepting that it's all true, right? Because you start to see it through a very different lens. So you were not failing to communicate well enough. You're trying to solve something that wasn't designed to be solved. They don't want it to get that sucks, right? It sucks to realize that. But the faster you accept that knowing, they actually don't want to resolve this, they don't want to have peace. And if they say they do, they're bullshitting you. I know you want peace. You're the only one who can get it for yourself.
(12:17)
They will not give that to you. They're not giving peace out on any kind of silver, gold or rose gold platter. So when responses become shorter, simpler, focused on only what actually matters, you get out of that emotional area. And we're not doing this to punish them. You don't have to be vindictive, you don't have to be mean. You be neutral, baby. That gray rock method is called gray rock for reason. What's gray? Neutral blend in neutral. We're not going to be sparkly. They don't get our sparkle and they don't get our dark because dark is not our natural state. Sparkle, of course it is. We're queens. They don't deserve all the sparkles so they can have our leftover neutral, okay? Actually my neutral is leopard print. So where do we go from there? I don't know. Okay, so you're not doing it though to punish them, okay?
(13:15)
So any guilt you have, spit it out. Just spit it out. It's gross. We don't like the taste of guilt, okay? We're going to just protect our peace. You're protecting your peace. And I've heard this so many times in different phrasing, but boundaries are not made to hurt others or control others, but to protect yourself. So anytime you have that guilt creep up, remember that part that did help me? I remember the first time I heard that years ago about boundaries. We've been conditioned by narcissists that boundaries are selfish. No, no ma'am. They're not selfish. No, they're protecting yourself, which is absolutely normal. You're not trying to control them. You're not telling them what to do. You are maybe telling them what you'll do if they do something, but that's not controlling them. That's a response, right? Here's an example, quick example.
(14:15)
If you continue to talk to me that way, I'm going to hang up the phone. You're not saying they can't talk to you that way. There's just a consequence, a natural consequence to them being a jackass. All right, get it. Okay, moving on. Reason three, oh my gosh, I'm so thirsty. I had pizza today. Do you guys get thirsty when you pizza? Hold on, I'm taking a swig. I feel like I get so thirsty. Maybe there's extra sodium in there. Is that a me thing? Alright, so reason three, part of you is still waiting for closure. Ah, it's true. So this one is a little quieter, but maybe deeper. Maybe it's deeper. Maybe we don't want to think about it, but maybe it's true. So ears open. Listen to Christy Jade. So many reactions happen because part of you still hopes that one interaction will feel different.
(15:20)
Maybe they'll finally understand. You can be a big tough ass bee. Like myself, I was always kind of tough. I wasn't as tough as I am now probably, but I was at a little tough side, maybe not with certain people, but even that tough girl who was like, I don't care, whatever. Was there a little hope, a little sliver that narc would hear me or not misunderstand me the trigger? Or maybe I'd be special enough to change them. Maybe they take accountability because they love me so much. By the way, PS, another heartbreaker is they don't really know what true love feels like. They don't love the same way as us. I don't know what to call it, but I don't want to call it anything right now. We're not going to talk about their love other than that can mess with your mind. So I'm slipping that in there. It's just a note. Just a little side note that they don't love the same way I get that question a lot, you guys, well, if he loved me, how could he do this? They don't love in the same way that we know how to love.
(16:42)
But back to the reactions I'm trying to hold on. Lemme look at my notes here happened because part of, yes, still the hope, still the hope that they will maybe show you kindness, that they'll soften, they'll have a wake up call, any of that. And there's nothing wrong with wanting that. It means you loved sincerely. And I don't want you to regret loving anything. Anyone in this world we're beautiful humans with beautiful love, beautiful hearts. Most of us are empaths that get taken advantage of by people like this, right? We have a lot to give. I am a wild, passionate Italian woman. I got a lot of love. I got a lot of spice. I will tell you how I think, especially now, but we have a lot of love and I don't want anyone to go, man, I wish I never, I wish I never, I believe we all had a path. We don't know all the reasons, but what do you do now? You learn lessons. Yes, but regretting love. No, it means you love sincerely. That's okay.
(18:06)
The healing accelerates though. When the closure stops being something that you want to receive, it doesn't come from the conversation going differently. Closure comes from you no longer needing that conversation to feel. Okay? That's when the actual shift starts happening. And I've had that in my own journey where I really, even though I didn't seek it deep down, there was this hope of this sliver of hope. I say didn't really know if it was there, but there was always a little hope. Well, maybe one day I'll get that, sorry or that call. And then I had another day where I woke up and said, I don't even want that call. I don't need that call. I don't care about that call anymore. I don't need that anymore because I had been on my healing journey. I had done the inside work, especially the somatic healing.
(19:30)
Blew all my healing out of the water. Hashtag somatic healing is the bomb. I don't know why I'm doing hashtags in the bomb. I'm really just regressing today. So welcome to my regression show. But I, in my journey, that moment of it was a new truth that was truly from the inside. I felt it deep and I know who I am. I don't need to be affirmed by other people anymore. I don't need a conversation for closure anymore. I know who I am. I know I loved hard. I love hard in general. I'm a good person. I'm a good wife. I'm a good sister, I'm a good mother, I'm a good daughter. And I'm not trying to be like, ooh, toot too. But at a point you finally get enough confidence, it doesn't mean you're cocky. It means you're saying, I am good enough. I'm finally good enough.
(20:43)
And if you've been conditioned by a narcissist bottom line, you believe you're not good enough. At some point, probably ongoing. And I never felt good enough because this narcissist, well, there's a couple in my life, but one started out and I didn't feel good enough because of how they messed with my mind and my beliefs about myself and to do all this beautiful somatic work and come out of that being like I'm not questioning myself anymore and gaining the self trust, not just confidence, right? I'm good enough, but I trust myself to know X, Y, z moving forward. That is huge. That's the hugest thing that I feel I can help guide you through in working with me. That is a gift. Not saying it's my gift. I'm just saying this work is a gift. I think it's a gift from God. I love that he placed it in my life and I've had such impact from it, and I love even more that I got to experience it, know how amazing it is, and immediately be like, okay, I need to put this into my work because now we are talking more than, I mean, it was great enough with the narcissistic abuse, recovery, coaching, now you're going to go sprinkle in the somatic stuff and lives are exploding in amazing ways.
(22:19)
I know that's a weird word to say, but it is just because it's mind blowing work. It's mind blowing. That's all I can say. It's really awesome. So I got totally sidetracked there, but I love it. So let's go back, wind this up, that closure, the shift starts happening once you let go of needing that closure, but there's a gap there. You need it probably right now if you're agreeing with this. So you need to do some healing before you can close that gap. And that's whether it's with your therapist, whether it's with me, whatever you can do to close that gap. So what does healing actually look like?
(23:06)
It's not the moment you never feel triggered again in your life, okay? It's actually kind of quieter than that. It's like pausing before responding, right? Take your little fingers away from that text message. Go put that phone in a drawer. Go back to it later and listen to the Gray Rock Method episode. I'll try to put that in the show notes. By the way, it looks like we're recovering faster, which is huge with somatic healing. It looks like noticing the reaction without being controlled by it. So you might get even a visceral response for a while. That might not be overnight that that leaves you. But instead of letting that marinate and take over and control your body and then your mind, you go, wow, I feel my body getting real tense about this. Let's say it's just a text message and you go, okay, I'm going to do some breathing.
(24:09)
We got some somatic tools from Christie Jade up in here. That's by the way, thrive in five on Thursdays are all about those tools. How can I take myself into the present moment, shift from away from being triggered and telling my body, guess what? Calm down. We're safe. We're good. Take a breath. Go take a walk. Go listen to some fun music. Go eat some bon bonds, okay? Get out of that moment. Don't be controlled by their shit anymore. And the day you realize something small, but life changing, the message comes in and your whole day doesn't collapse. It doesn't affect you the rest of the day. You don't have to go call your girlfriends. You don't have to cry and eat too many bond bonds. We got to moderate our bond bonds. And that's when your nervous system finally understands, I am safe. Now I just put my hands in my heart. Oh, I was feeling that. It's my favorite little phrase. I'm safe now.
(25:21)
So if you're still reacting, sometimes you're not behind. First of all, you're in very good company. I know a lot of you guys, you can actually join my Facebook page and chat together. That's in the show notes too, right? You're not broken. You're in the middle of your body learning a new definition of safety. You're in a transition. That's all it is. So just breathe. Not everything can happen overnight, and you're not going to win healing by never being triggered. We all want that. I hope to never be triggered again. I can still get triggered, but it's what I can now do with it because of my healing. I got to take another swig, man.
(26:13)
I'm sure it's lovely to listen to out there. You like it my gulps. So you actually win when their behavior stops. Like deciding your emotional state. Take your power back, queen. Don't let them do that. You're letting them do that. They're not doing it. No one can control your emotions and that's not fun. We love to blame everybody else, and I'm not trying to put blame on you, not adding to guilt or shame, but saying we do get to heal and we get to shift that power and it's beautiful. This is empowerment. And then it shifts slowly and then all at once. I do feel like there's this click moment where just like a lot changes, you go through these motions and it's like boom. And you're like, whoa. And you look back, you're like, I get here. This is amazing and it's coming for you.
(27:09)
You're listening to this podcast. So obviously you're one step closer to freedom. So if this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs the reminder that healing isn't about perfection, it's just about progress. And if you, like I said, you want some deeper support, I basically do coaching and somatic healing wrapped up into one. And we do one hour sessions once a week, and I have three programs we could do three months, six month and 12 month. And you can read about them in the show notes if you want more details or you can always email me. My email will be in the show notes too. You can ask me more about them or we set up a fun little call and start if you're ready. Yeah, I know I want this. I'm in. You can start with three months, six month, 12 month. They all have Voxer access, which is a fun walkie talkie app.
(28:12)
So you can either just text normal people or do voice messaging, which I say like normal people because some of my friends hate voice messaging. I like it, I'm fine with it. But you can do that. It's on Voxer and I can explain details of that. But generally I check that once or twice a day and I'll get back to you within 24 hours during Monday through Friday. So that's a fun thing my clients love taking advantage of. And it's in between our weekly calls. They get to be like, Hey, I was just thinking about this. Someone might be, I've got spinning out calls. You can't leave. 80 minute messages says, okay guys, but you get my point. I mean, I've had people kind of spinning out and like, oh, this thought's resonated. And then I get to come back and remind them what a queen they are, and I give them tools.
(29:06)
Maybe in the moment, go do X, Y, Z. And it's beautiful. They get this in-between support. So I don't know. I love my programs, but I'm very biased. No, I'm just kidding. If you do have questions, seriously, please email me or read the more detailed descriptions on the links. You can click the links and read more and sign up because I want to work with you because I want to help more people because f these narcs that think they can get away with this, know we are going to heal and we are going to take over the damn world. World, yes, Queens. All right, let's end with I feel like we need to some affirmations. Take a nice breath through your nose, out your mouth, and repeat after me. All right. Let's see what's a good one for this week? I separate my energy from their dark energy. Okay, I am no longer in danger because I am a queen. Yes, you are. Shine that crown. Go sign up to work with me. Make sure to follow so you don't miss any episodes on whatever platform you're on. And I will see you in the next episode on Thursday. Love you. Bye.
31 min
February 12 3 Boundary Traps Narcissists Use in Co-Parenting And How to Outsmart Them Every Time
Short Description
Narcissistic co-parents are masters at twisting boundaries—but you don’t have to fall for their traps. In this Thrive in 5, I break down 3 sneaky tactics they use and exactly how to outsmart them so you can protect your peace and power. 👑✨
💻 Courses & Coaching
👑 Empowered Boundaries Course → https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/
✨ Work 1:1 With Me (current 1:1 programs) →
3-Month Coaching Container
Focused, high-touch support to stabilize your nervous system, strengthen boundaries, and stop being emotionally hijacked by co-parenting dynamics.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/transformational-coaching-quarterly/
6-Month Coaching Container
Deeper healing and integration for women ready to fully rebuild self-trust, emotional safety, and confidence after narcissistic abuse.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/6-month-queens-of-peace-program/
12-Month Coaching Container
A long-term, transformational container for women ready to fully reclaim their power, peace, and identity — and create a steady, regulated life beyond survival mode.
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/12-month-queens-of-peace-program/
🌟 Connect & Resources
👑 Join the Private Facebook Community → https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade
🎁 Free Boundaries Pocket Guide → https://christyjade.ck.page/ce79ea9250
🎤 Subscribe to the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Podcast → https://www.podbean.com/podcast-detail/f7vsi-208d1a/Narcissistic-Abuse-Recovery-Podcast
🎧 Related Podcast Episode
🪨 The Grey Rock Method: How to Deal with a Narcissist if You Cannot Go No Contact
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-grey-rock-method-how-to-deal-with-a-narcissist/id1662241353?i=1000648879776
TRANSCRIPTS
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five, your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting and that text you knew better than to reply to take a breath Queen. This one's for you. Today we are breaking down the three biggest boundary traps that narcissists use in co-parenting. They are sneaky little ways. They try to keep you off balance, steal your peace and rope you into their chaos. No thank you. So here's the best part. I'm not just going to tell you what the traps are. I'm going to give you the exact tools to outsmart them every single time. Queen Edge. Alright, so the first is the infamous guilt trip. You're probably familiar with that, right? They'll say things like, if you really cared about the kids, you'd switch weekends or you're being so selfish by not helping me out. And what is their goal to make you feel like a bad mom or a bad co-parent?
(01:09)
Bad parent, period. Unless you cave, right? They're trying to get whatever fits into what benefits them. So how do you outsmart it? First you stick to the plan and then literally repeat the boundary without defending it. Remember this part without defending it? So that could look like, nope, we're going to stick to the parenting schedule and then pause. Zip it. Do not explain. Okay? We have a tendency when we are people pleasers or empaths or don't want to be misunderstood. That was a big trigger for me just in my life being misunderstood. So over explaining can make us feel like maybe we'll be understood or just giving reasons, right? Don't explain, don't argue, don't get emotional. None of those things are going to help, okay? You want to outsmart them. Remember that the silence is actually the strength, okay? Remember, silence is strength. Silence is strength.
(02:18)
Don't take the bait. Okay? So number two, the endless negotiator, okay, you say no and they immediately push back. Well what about just this one time? Or well if we switch next week instead, or what if I pick them up later instead of earlier? What if all the different things to try to get their way somehow and getting their way equals what? Control. That's what they're trying to get. We're not going to give it to 'em, okay? They keep changing the terms to wear you down. So this is actually calculated, manipulative. When they're doing this. They figure if they can drag you into the back and forth, they then already have your energy. They're already gaining the power over you. So how do we outsmart it? Again, don't take the bait. My favorite phrase of life, restate once, then disengage. So it's very similar. So something like, no, we'll be sticking to the plan.
(03:27)
If they keep pushing, don't respond. I would maybe say it twice. If they have a first negotiation party coming out of their mouth, say, Nope, we'll be sticking to the plan. Nope, we'll be sticking the plan and then don't respond. Or maybe on the third time you say, I've already answered and move on your time, energy and sanity are what is not up for negotiation. And if you let them repeatedly suck you into where you're responding over and over and over, they are gaining that power and feeling like they're getting you closer and closer to giving them what they want. And they probably are half the time, okay? So don't get sucked in. Alright? So trap three, the victim act, okay? They'll say something like, you're making my life harder or You're the reason I can't see my kids as much as I want. They play the poor me card to twist the narrative and put you back in caretaker mode.
(04:44)
They know at this point that you have a big heart. They know that. Know your soft spots, they know your buttons so they know even more specifically what they can say in these situations to get you to feel sorry for them. So how do you outsmart this? Don't step into the role they are assigning you. Okay? I want you to hear that one. Don't step into the role they are assigning you. It's not your role, baby. Okay? It ain't your role. It doesn't look good on you anymore. Nope, we're moving on. So a simple firm statement like I'm not responsible for your feelings. We're following the parenting plan. And then again, if they come push back, you repeat again, we're following the parenting plan. And then you say, I've already answered, move on. If you give it that much, I'm saying three max, three responses max.
(05:49)
It's not your job to rescue them. I know we love rescuing. Gosh, I mean, I adopted a child, I adopted a dog. I'm all about that rescue life. I get it, girl. No, but I know you probably have a beautiful heart. You understand? You feel like, oh, maybe they had a hard childhood or this and that, all the things, or oh, they lost their job. There's so many things and feelings, I get it. But it is your job to protect your peace and your child's emotional safety above everything else. If you're a God person, it is God, you and your kid. It is not your job to save a narcissist. It's not your job to save a toxic person. It's not your job to save anyone, your child hell yeah, save that child and saving your own sanity for yourself, but also for your child.
(06:52)
Your child needs the most stable, healthy minded parent they can, especially because they have another parent who is so unhealthy. Okay? So keep that in mind when you're feeling guilty or second guessing your role, that's your role. Your role is to be a peaceful parent and that does not mean that you cave to the narcissist. Okay? So here's your thriving five challenge for the week. You like that? Alright? You're going to watch for these traps, the guilt trip, the negotiator, the victim, and the next time one of them shows up, practice outsmarting it by keeping your responses short, firm and free of over-explaining. And again, I've mentioned a lot recently, I feel like my Gray Rock Method episodes, so if I forget to link them, I hope I don't, I might. And just look up Gray Rock Method in my podcast or with my name and it should come up.
(08:00)
I think there's two episodes on the Gray Rock method that is all about going a little more deeply into this stuff. But if you want even more tools to help you hold boundaries that actually stick, I mean it is a whole, my course is epic. You will never ever regret purchasing it. It has changed people's lives just from the course. Obviously the one-on-one work is super transformational and customized because I'm there with you every step of the way. The second best thing, if you really want to have transformational experience with not just the co-parent, but anyone else you come into contact with that is controlling, toxic, any of that unhealthy, and you aren't so great at keeping boundaries or maintaining them or what to do in the conversations if they push back or if they do not respect your boundaries. All of that is in that it is a 10 video course and it's one dripped out every week.
(09:12)
These have been selling like little cute pancakes, hotcakes sound like the hotcakes because it's really, really important as a foundation to thrive. In order to thrive, you need to be confident and set boundaries. It is the foundation of moving on into this kind of thriving mentality, which you can do by the way, no matter who you are, what you've been through, you can, there's 10 modules. There's a meditation bundle that goes along with it. If you're into the namaste, calm your body and it's designed to help you step out of survival mode and into peace. Because if you're feeling stuck, one of the problems that is keeping you stuck a big major problem is that you're not feeling strong enough, confident enough, and self trusting enough to set boundaries. And we talk about that in the boundary scores. So it's the energetics, it's the confidence, it's building that and setting the boundaries, evaluating what boundaries you need to have, having the conversations if you need to have them.
(10:32)
And again, going from there, okay, Queens need boundaries and you're a damn queen. Look at you. Go look in the mirror. Would you take a second? Go check her out. She's super hot and she looks like she needs a boundary course called Empowered Boundaries. So I'll put the link in the show notes if you want to do one-on-one. Those of you listening who have signed up with me recently, one-on-one, my coaching, my hours are getting crammed and crammed and I have less space and I'm feeling bad because I'm booking up. It's a great thing for me, but I really want to help everyone I can. So if you are considering working with me, jump in there. Let's get a one-on-one session. I have one-on-one. There's a one-off, which this is not a one-off work, this is not, oh, let's do one and done. This is you're doing your intake call with me to get to know each other and obviously we can feel it out and go from there.
(11:37)
And if you're just like, I just want in on this, I want a huge transformation. There is a package for one month and there's a package for three months. The three months you get a bonus of Voxer in between all our calls. So you get once a week calls. So a lot of fun little options. I'll put them in the show notes. But this boundaries course, right now we're talking about boundaries. That's why I was really focusing on that. And it is a less expensive way if you are tight on funds right now, it's really inexpensive for what you get and you get it for lifetime access. So you can go back to it, refer to it over and over again. It's amazing. Yes, I'm biased, but it's the hottest shit you'll ever, ever see in your life. Okay? All right, so that is your thriving five. Keep your crown high, protect that sparkle, and remember, you can outsmart the traps and reclaim your peace. Okay? You can trust me. I've done it and now you're going to do it. So look, these little tips, they can help. You want to go deeper, you want to really transform, you have to actually invest in that. And is it is priceless by doing a course or doing one-on-one work, whether it's with me or someone else.
(13:14)
That is how you make change. If you're feeling stuck, that's how you get unstuck. Okay? So I would love you to sign up for either the course or one-on-one work. Let's do this. You are worth it. Peace is truly priceless. I'm not just saying this right? I'm not just like, oh yeah, here's this course I'm telling you, you deserve to be able to feel confident and comfortable setting boundaries in your life and having peace and showing your children what they should and should not accept in their life. And that's what boundaries do. Not controlling other people, controlling our peace and what happens to us and what we do with that. So I could go on and on, but I will not because you got stuff to do. I got stuff to do. I'm going to go put my coconut oil on. I just got coconut oil for my face.
(14:10)
Raw Coconut oil by coco and Company. Nope, it's not a commercial, it's just me blabbing because I'm staring at it excited. It smells delicious. I want to eat it, but I won't eat it when it's on my face. Cause that be extra weird? Okay, so on that note, I'll let you go. And if you also have not joined my Facebook group, private Facebook group, get in there. That link is also always in the show notes. So go just have a field day in the show notes, see what's there. It's fun. This is 14 minutes and probably 10 minutes of me just rambling. But that's what you get on the Christie Jade show. Should I change the title? Alright, you guys have a great weekend and I'll be back on Tuesday with the regular episodes. And Thursdays are Thrive in five because we can thrive in five, or in this case, 15. All right, smooches deuces. See you in the next one. Love you.

16 min

About NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

From the publisher's feed

Healing Tools for Women

Are you feeling lost after breaking free from a toxic relationship? Are you afraid you will get sucked back in, whether it is with the same narcissist or a new one? Are you ready to finally live in peace?

In this podcast, you will find healing methods and coping solutions to set you free from narcissistic abuse and its effects. My mission is to equip you to become strong and free through confidence building, proven healing methods and finding peace. If you’re ready to say yes to thriving after abuse and stop chasing everything that hasn’t worked for a plan that will- you’re in the right place!

Hey, I’m Christy. A mom, wife and a ruthless narcissist avoider! For years of my life, I went to therapists that didn’t understand narcissism, read generic abuse recovery books and tried things that didn’t help me truly disconnect and break the cycle of narcissistic abuse. I wasted money on tools that didn’t give me lasting results. I finally realized that if I was going to truly disconnect and heal, I had to understand narcissists’ minds and the effects on their victims. After years of education and endless conversations with victims of narcissistic abuse, I created a perfect plan to not just disconnect fully from the current narcissists in my life, but to avoid getting sucked in by future ones, while creating healthy boundaries and healing from the effects of abuse. A life of thriving, not just surviving. And I am ready to share it all with you!

If you are a woman ready to finally find a clear cut plan to stop the cycle and heal from narcissistic abuse -effective solutions that have results that are undeniable: like a peaceful night’s sleep, decreased overwhelm, and unshakable confidence, then this podcast is for you!
Grab that mocha latte, it’s time to dive in.

Wanna work together 1:1, queen? Grab your first power call for mindset and somatic healing now:
https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/

Best of NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

Ranked by our users in the last 21 days

Share NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

Sign up to save your podcasts

NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship episodes

About NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

Best of NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

More shows like NARCISSISTIC ABUSE RECOVERY | Narcissist, Co-Parenting, Grey Rock Method, Boundaries, Healing, Toxic Relationship

The Overwhelmed Brain

The Terri Cole Show

The Positive Mindset Podcast

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Love and Abuse

Narcissist Apocalypse: Patterns of Abuse

Heal Your Heartbreak

Adult Child

The Covert Narcissism Podcast

Claim Your Power

Waking Up to Narcissism

Navigating Narcissism with Dr. Ramani

Jillian on Love

Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse

You Are Not Crazy