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Brianne Davis is an actress that you've seen in Lucifer, Dawson's Creek, True Blood, CSI Miami, The History Channel's Six and so much more.  But Brianne was harboring a secret;  she was a sex and love addict.  After 16 years of sobriety in Sex and Love Addiction Anonymous, she made the decision to break her anonymity and share her journey with a fictionalized account of her life, "Secret Life of a Hollywood Sex & Love Addict." 

Regardless of your drug of choice, you will be able to identify with "Roxanne's" journey.  In this discussion, Matt and Brianne talk about what sex and love addiction is, why she wrote the book and how Brianne wants to help others through a topic that few want to discuss.

You can also catch Brianne on her podcast, The Secret Life podcast where Brianne pulls back the curtain on the deepest, darkest, heartbreaking, and even silly secrets from an eclectic group of guests.

You can buy Brianne's book, Secret Life of a Hollywood Sex & Love Addict here from Brianne's site at https://secretlifenovel.com/

Click here to listen to The Secret Life Podcast on Apple Podcasts

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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The idea of Rock Bottom can be a misnomer and can be a hindrance to finding recovery.  It can be easy to compare someone else's bottom to your own and therefore decided I'm, "not that bad."  On this episode, Matt J, Steve C and John I talk about the concept of Rock Bottom and how everyone's bottom can be different.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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We conclude our pass through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous with Step 12: 

Step 12 - Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to
carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our
affairs.

Step 12 is is a very broad step and can be looked to as the "Sponsorship Step," but it's so much more than that.  John I and Steve C join the show to tell us so much more.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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John I and Steve C join the show to continue our discussion of the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.  This week, it's Steps 10 and 11.

Step 10 - Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly
admitted it.

Step 11 - Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with
God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and
the power to carry that out.

We talk about how these steps give us an outlet for when we are not perfect and the path to talk to the higher power of our own on doing the next right thing.

We have a related discussion about Back to Eden Gardening and Paul Gautschi, as it relates to letting go and letting God.

You can watch the Back to Eden Film by clicking here.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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Steve C and John I join the show for our continued work on the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.  We talk about why it's important to make good with those we've harmed and why it's critical to do this step with a sponsor.

Step 8: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make
amends to them all.

Step 9: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do
so would injure them or others.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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Steps 6 and 7 have the shortest write up in the big book.  It does not make them any less important.  These are two steps Matt J says he puts into his daily life most frequently.  Steve C and John I join the program to wrap up Step 5 and talk about how to quickly get into being ready to let go of our defects of character and then asking our higher power to remove them.

Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Step 7 - Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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Steps 4 and 5 go together, much like Steps 8 and 9.  One step is the inventory of our wrongs and the other is when we actually speak them out loud.  They separate the men from boys and can derail someone in early sobriety.  Much like Steps 8 and 9, they cause anxiety in the new person in recovery but can be the path to moving past things that tripped us before.  They are the steps to unload what is no longer necessary and the journey to a new way of life.

John I and Steve C join the show to talk about their experience with Steps 4 and 5.

Step 4: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature
of our wrongs.

Step 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature
of our wrongs.

Check out our website at https://notalonerecovery.com/ for tools, resources and ways to listen to the show.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

👉 Subscribe for free at soberfriendspod.substack.com

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John I and Steve C join the show to talk about what each step is and how it's implemented in the 12 steps of recovery.

Step 1:  We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.

Step 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to
sanity.

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we
understood Him

Join us at https://notalonerecovery.com/

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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Each week we've focused on the alcoholic but the family is affected by this disease too.  For this episode, I invited my old friend Gerri who has been surrounded by alcoholics in her life.  Alcoholism affects more than just the alcoholic, it affects family and friends too.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

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The number one killer of alcoholics is a resentment.  Steve C and John I join the program to talk about what a resentment is and why it's so dangerous.

Check out our website at https://notalonerecovery.com/ to listen to the show, find our social media links and find helpful recovery links.

Love the show? Stay connected between episodes with the Sober Friends Dispatch—our Substack newsletter packed with real stories, honest reflections, and tools to help you live your best sober life.

👉 Subscribe for free at soberfriendspod.substack.com

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📫 Get more honest conversations about sobriety delivered to your inbox! Subscribe to The Sober Friends Dispatch, our weekly newsletter where we go beyond the podcast to share real strategies for alcohol-free living. Join our community by clicking here.