7 Signs that you are relating to a person with Borderline Personality who may not be
diagnosed or if diagnosed hasn't disclosed that to you. These 7 signs are more
nuanced to emotional instability and the communication impossibility that are both
core deficits of people with BPD, diagnosed or not. Too many people have a sense
or highly suspect a person you are dating or in a relationship with has BPD but aren't
sure what to do because they don't have positive proof that this person has BPD.
People with Codependency, especially, will often keep denying how they are being hurt
and will abandon self to try to fix this other person. Codependent lack of self trust
can impede your ending the relationship because you are "not sure". No one need be
100 percent sure if two or three or more of thsse 7 signs are being experienced.

Borderlines and Codependents both have considerable denial. It's not manifested
in each groups lives the exact same way yet it underpins a lot of this most
unhealthy bond. Online Borderlines often use "we" when they share their narrative
(often not a very aware one). People with Codependency most often use "they" and
this matters not only because of Codependent denial but also the often focused on
"they" is an obstacle to healing and recovery and increases exponentially the pain
of people with Codependency in, during, and after the BPD relationship breakup.

The relational impossibility with people with Borderline Personality Disorder is about them - NOT YOU! It's time to respect yourself, get into therapy to heal and recover and go and stay no contact. It's time to find you again. The breakup was not you, it was the borderline.
You are not at fault or to blame.

BPD or NPD relationship breakups. The first step to surviving and transitioning to an
active recovery process begins with a rationally known final Breakup even when
cognitive and emotional dissonance still drives rumination and strong feelings of
wanting an Ex back but knowing that you just can't do it again.

BPD relationships are no win relationships for those with BPD and for those who
try so hard to love them. They are about control struggle two-way dynamics.
These relationships between people with BPD and people with Codependency lack
emotional intimacy, lack respect, lack mutuality and reciprocity. BPD Relationships
are no win relationships with all the foundational pillars of healthy love being absent
leaving these relationships trying to function in trauma bonds that increase emotional
pain, suffering, and loss of self of loved ones.

BPD triggers are real but others closest to a person with BPD do not cause their
triggers. You are not responsible for how they feel. And, Borderlines, while
responsible for often hurting others, and lacking any personal responsibility or
accountability - they don't make people with Codependency or who are close to them
feel how you feel either. It is how you think that creates how you feel.

There are 10 major choices that can lead to the action of trying to get your BPD Ex back that have consequences. For most who might succeed at getting a BPD Ex back the Borderline devaluation cycles that lead to relationship breakup again
happen faster and there is no re-idealization in getting a BPD Ex back.

These relationships are unhealthy, and will not work out.

BPD Breakup - Want Your Ex Back? Codependents Need For Radical Acceptance
In In any BPD Relationship Breakup Ex's or on/off Ex's often with Codependency
need to learn and pratice radical acceptance along with getting expert help
whether still wanting the BPD Ex back or not. Radically accepting that people
with untreated BPD do not love you, cannot love you or attach to you, and they
cannot take in your love is a core practice that can be an effective part of
getting into a healing and recovery process.

Borderline Revolving Door Situationship -Can It Work? Borderline Revolving Door
Situationships see the borderline come and go many times in weeks or months.
Why do Codependents keep letting them come back?

Does Your BPD Ex Remember The Good Times? A.J. Mahari's answer, the explanation and
how staying invested in this answer is self-abandonment and going to increase your pain. What do you need to do to get past this question and false hope to start healing your pain?