The Jay Alderton Podcast

Being needed is not the same as being known.

For the next half hour, nobody needs anything from you. If that makes you uncomfortable, this walk is for you.

Episode three of The Power Walk. 30 minutes.

Phone in your pocket, shoes on, press play and walk.

This one's a bit quieter. We're looking at the roles you've collected over the years. The parent. The partner. The one who sorts everything out. And asking what happens when you take them all off.

You didn't lose yourself in one go. You gave yourself away in pieces, one sensible decision at a time. On this walk, we're making a bit of room for the person holding the whole thing up.

On this walk:

• A guided breathing reset to settle your head
• The roles you carry, and what is left when you set them down
• How being useful became the way you measure your worth
• Why looking after yourself matters to everyone leaning on you
• The difference between being needed and being known
• This week's one thing: half an hour, once a week, doing something that doesn't need an outcome

WALK WITH US

Join us in Thrive at 40 and make some space for yourself alongside people doing the same.

Join here: https://www.skool.com/thriveat40/about

New to The Power Walk?

Start with episode one. The series builds week to week.

Walk somewhere safe, keep your head up, and if the breathing makes you light-headed, drop the holds and breathe normally.

They don't need more of you. They need you to last.

You haven't got the time. Neither has anybody else. Nobody's got spare time. The difference is what goes in first.

Episode two of The Power Walk. 30 minutes.

Phone in your pocket, shoes on, press play and walk.

This week we're doing your diary. Not the sexiest thing anyone's said to you this week, I know. Stick with me. It might be the most useful half hour of the whole series.

Your diary isn't a list of what you've got on. It's a list of what you actually value. And for most people over 40, the thing that moves every time something comes up is their own health. No discussion. It doesn't even feel like a decision.

On this walk:

- A two-minute breathing reset to clear your head

- Going back through your week and finding the bit that's actually for you

- What "I haven't got the time" really means, and what it's quietly costing you

- The big rock, and why your health goes in first (not because it matters more than your kids)

- Why three sessions a week is less than 1% of your week

- This week's one thing. It's admin. You'll want to skip it. Don't.

WALK WITH US

Every Monday in Thrive at 40, members post their Focus Three: the three sessions they're committing to that week, where everyone can see them. You've just picked yours on this walk. Come and post them.

Join here: https://www.skool.com/thriveat40/about

New to The Power Walk?

Start with episode one. The series builds week to week.

Walk somewhere safe, keep your head up, and if the breathing makes you light-headed, drop the holds and breathe normally.

Big rock goes in first. Everything else pours in around it.

Everyone in your house started again this month. New shoes, new bag, photo on the doorstep. Everyone except the person who organised all of it.

Get your coat on. This one's a walk.

-----

This is the first Power Walk.

Here's how it works: you get outside, you press play, and you walk for half an hour. I talk for some of it. For a decent chunk of it I shut up and let you think, because the thinking is the bit that does something.

No pace to hit. No distance. No app counting your calories. Your phone goes in your pocket and it stays there.

----

In this first episode we talk about the thing nobody mentions in September, that the whole house gets a fresh start except you.

The kids get a new teacher, a clean page and nobody holding last year against them. You get the same desk, the same inbox, the same Monday and the same body you had in August.

Then we get into what waiting actually costs you. Not the fitness that comes back quicker than you think.

It's the fourteen Januarys you've written off, and the file of evidence you've built saying you're the sort of person who doesn't stick at things.

Every one of those entries, you wrote yourself.

By the end you'll have picked one thing. Not a plan. Not an overhaul. One thing small enough that you can still picture yourself doing it in February, when it's dark and wet and nobody's watching.

You don't need a fresh start. You just need to start. They're two completely different things, and one of them you can do before you get home.

00:00 — Arrival. What The Power Walk is, and how to walk it. Shoulders down, chin up, phone in the pocket.

03:00 — Breath reset. Two minutes of box breathing. Four in, four hold, four out, four hold. Follow the sound, don't count.

06:00 — Recognition. School shoes, the doorstep photo, and the person who organised all of it. When did you last actually begin something?

12:00 — The cost. Fourteen years of waiting for January. What eleven days in a row actually buys you.

18:00 — The fire. Pace up. Find a hill. January is a made-up line on a calendar and your body has no idea what date it is.

23:00 — Breath down and the one thing. Longer exhales, then you pick your one thing and say it out loud on the pavement.

27:00 — Walk home. Tomorrow it'll feel small and a bit stupid. Do it anyway.

Your job this week

Pick one thing. Say it out loud while you're out there.

Not a plan, not a transformation — one thing you can still see yourself doing in February. Three walks a week. No drink on a school night. Lights out by half ten. This walk, same time, every week for sixteen weeks.

Then do it tomorrow, when you don't feel like this.

Anything above zero compounds if you do it long enough.

What's in this episode

Sixteen episodes, one a week, through to the end of the year. Same shape every time: you get outside, you get your breath sorted, you get something to chew on, and you come home with one decision made.

Best done on the same day each week so it becomes a fixture rather than a thing you fit in. Headphones, coat, no destination.

The breath work in this episode is done walking, at an easy pace. If you get light-headed at any point, drop the holds and breathe normally. If you're pregnant, or you've got a heart or respiratory condition, or anything else that makes you pause — skip the holds and just walk. It works fine without them.

If you want people walking next to you while you do this, that's what Thrive at 40 is for people over forty, rebuilding one ordinary decision at a time.

👉 https://www.skool.com/thriveat40

I sat down with my good pal Paul Mort straight after an event he'd invited me down to speak at, hit record, and had no plan whatsoever.

What came out wasn't really a business podcast. It's about pace, obsession, escapism, ADHD, and what it's like being a dad to kids who are wired the same way you are.

What we get into:

• Why the day you plant the seed isn't the day you pick the flower — and how much pressure that takes off you in the quiet stretches
• Minimum effective dose, and why the boring version of consistency is harder than the dramatic version
• Freezing Tuesday night in Stoke vs Wembley on a Saturday — who you actually are when it's not fun
• Why everyone asks for thirty books in January and reads four
• Escapism, and why we both need somewhere the phone doesn't come
• ADHD as an interest surplus rather than an attention deficit
• Whether a label gives you relief or gives you an excuse
• Parenting a kid with the same wiring as you — and getting the push/pull balance wrong
• The runway: realising you've got a handful of years left where they still want to come with you
• Cringe mountain, and why being embarrassing is the job description

Fair warning it's sweary and it goes everywhere. That's rather the point.

Links

Paul Mort: https://www.instagram.com/paulmortofficial/

Thrive at 40: https://www.skool.com/thriveat40

If you got something out of this, a rating and a review genuinely help more people find it.

Giving up alcohol was harder than box jumping Mount Everest. Here's what nobody tells you about the first two years, and the one skill that makes it stick. I've box jumped the height of Mount Everest. I've pushed a 140kg sled for 24 hours straight. I ran 109 kilometres backwards in a day. None of it came close to putting down a pint. Here's why. From the age of 16, I ran every emotion I had through alcohol. Sad, stressed, bored, celebrating, grieving it all went through the same door for 26 years.

So when you stop, you're not giving up a drink. You're rebuilding your entire emotional operating system from scratch, at 40-odd years old, with no instructions. In this podcast, I discuss Why year one feels like something is permanently missing, and why that feeling is accurate rather than a sign you're failing

How you build new evidence: your first holiday, first Christmas, first birthday, first grief, all banked without it

Drink dreams, and why your brain keeps writing you a future with alcohol in it that doesn't exist

The difference between having a thought and acting on oneWhy a craving passes in 15 to 20 minutes, and what that single fact changes I'm 18 months in. I'm not going to tell you it gets easy, because it didn't. I'll tell you it gets different, and that's better. If you're over 40 and you've been quietly wondering whether the drinking is the thing holding everything else back — this one's for you. If you're struggling with alcohol, please talk to your GP or a support service. There's no medal for doing it on your own. Join the Thrive at 40 community (7-day trial)https://www.skool.com/thriveat40

It took me 10 years to find balance with my health and fitness — because I had to get it badly wrong at both extremes first. If you're over 40 and struggling to stay consistent, this is why.In this video, I share how I went from tracking every gram of food as a competitive bodybuilder to a 235lb "bulk" built on Guinness, and the one lesson from both extremes that changed everything: you can't start at balance. You have to earn it.🚀 JOIN THRIVE AT 40 The exact habits, training and nutrition frameworks I use with my clients ( for men and women over 40)https://www.skool.com/thriveat40

The six weeks of summer are when most people over 40 quietly lose everything they've built.

Here are six simple things that keep you on track when the routine goes out the window.

Every year it's the same pattern. The kids break up, the plans stack up, the routine falls apart, and by September you're back where you started.

But a repeatable problem deserves a repeatable strategy, and that's exactly what this video gives you.

I've spent 14 years coaching people in person and online, and over 15,000 people have been through my programmes and challenges.

These six tips are the ones I give clients every single summer, because they work when time, energy and patience are all in short supply.

You'll learn why controlling your environment beats relying on willpower, how a 10-minute EMOM can replace the gym session you haven't got time for, why maintaining your weight over six weeks is genuine progress rather than failure, and the one keystone habit that makes every other habit easier to hold.

Come and join us in Thrive at 40, my community for anyone approaching 40, at 40, or beyond who wants to get fit, focused and energised

https://www.skool.com/thriveat40

Shoes on, headphones in, press play. This is a 30-minute guided walk for anyone over 40.

No pace to hit, no distance to track, just you, my voice, and a few questions worth walking with.

Fair warning: it starts gentle. It doesn't stay gentle.

This walk is Day 1 of the Just Do One Thing Challenge

Seven days, one small thing a day, built for people with a job, a family, and about forty spare minutes on a good day. It's free.

If you've found this on its own, start the challenge here:

👉 Join Here

Small things done consistently turn into big things over time.

This walk is the first one.

Sit down, press play, and follow my voice. Three full rounds.

This is a guided breathwork session based on the Wim Hof Method.

If you've never done anything like this before, here's what actually happens....

You'll take around thirty deep breaths in a row. Then you'll breathe out and hold, no air in your lungs, for as long as is comfortable.

Then one deep breath back in, hold that for fifteen seconds, and let go.

That's one round. We do three.

You'll probably feel tingling in your hands and face, maybe a bit light-headed.

That's normal, and it passes.

What most people notice afterwards is a kind of calm they haven't felt in a while, and a much easier night's sleep.

Why I'm putting this on a podcast for people over 40.

Your problem was never that you can't work hard. You've been working hard for twenty-odd years, That's half the reason you're knackered.

The problem is you've got no gear between full throttle and unconscious.

Work, kids, phone, telly, sleep, repeat.

This is that missing gear. Being able to drop your own heart rate on purpose is a skill, and like any skill, you have to practise it.

Twenty minutes. You've got twenty minutes.

⚠️ READ THIS BEFORE YOU START

This is the important bit. Please don't skip it.

NEVER do this breathing in or near water. No baths, no pools, no sea, no showers. Breath holding after deep breathing can make you black out with no warning at all. People have drowned doing this. This is not a "be careful" — it's a never.

Never do it while driving, or operating anything, or standing up, or anywhere you could fall and hurt yourself.

Always sit or lie down somewhere safe and soft. Do it at home, on the floor or in a chair, with nothing hard nearby.

It's normal to feel tingling, light-headedness, or a bit spaced out. It is not normal to feel real pain or serious distress — if you do, stop, breathe normally, and don't push on.

Never force a breath hold. This is not a competition and there is no target. When your body wants air, take it.

Do not do this session if you are pregnant, or if you have epilepsy, high blood pressure, a heart condition, a history of stroke, or any respiratory condition — including asthma. If you've got any health condition at all, or you take regular medication, or you're just not sure, speak to your GP first. That's not me covering myself, that's genuinely the right call.

By listening you accept that you're doing this at your own risk. I'm a fitness coach, not a doctor, and I can't see you through a podcast. Use your own judgement and be sensible.

If you've stumbled across this on its own hello.

This session is Day 5 of the Just Do One Thing Challenge.

Seven days, one small task a day. A walk, three short workouts, a stretch session, this breathwork, and a ten-minute reflection at the end. That's it.

No overhaul, no diet, no six-week transformation photo.

It's built for people over 40 who've got a job, a family, and about forty spare minutes on a good day. The whole thing runs on one idea: small things done consistently turn into big things over time.

It's free, and you can start it whenever you like.

👉 CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE JUST DO ONE THING CHALLENGE

Most men over 40 are unknowingly speeding up their own ageing.

In this episode, I break down 7 science-backed longevity tips to help you reclaim your energy, sharpen your mind, and build a body that lasts. No biohacking fads. Just real strategies the longest-living, highest-performing men swear by.

Whether you're dealing with low energy, brain fog, belly fat that won't shift, or you've just lost your edge, these 7 habits are the foundation for thriving in your 40s, 50s, and beyond.

CONNECT WITH JAY:

🔗 Apply for the Renaissance Man Programme — https://jayalderton.typeform.com/to/SZswaJP4

📚 Free: 40 Books Every Man Should Read at 40 — https://jayalderton.myflodesk.com/ch033qbyrk

🌐 Website — https://www.jayalderton.com/