By Nikki Spo
It's not about knowing everything. It's about coming to know ourselves. The Know with Nikki Spo is a podcast that highlights the experiences of people who are finding and celebrating their inner kn
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The podcast currently has 160 episodes available.
What is up my friends and welcome back to The Know! Today we have Marni Battista who is the founder of Dating with Dignity and the Institute for Living Courageously. Marni is one of those women who is walking the talk, she's just doin it all! We have so much to cover today but some of the heavy hitting topics you can expect from this episode is dating after divorce in today's complex social environment, were talking about why women date unavailable men, and how we can move away from suffering through unfulfilling relationships and into relationships that are fulfilling, love centered, want based, happy, and safe. With that, let's get started!
I also have some exciting news to share…I know first hand the power of community and shared experience and I am so honored to announce that I have created an online women's community where we talk about all of life's topics. In my group Becoming HER, we are striving to become the best versions of ourselves and realize that SHE is ME and that we can become the her of our highest desires. I have a special promotion for my podcast audience and I want to welcome you all to becoming her where we will do great things together!
In this episode…
Quotes
“Dating with dignity is waking up the next day feeling great about yourself. It's about not taking rejection personally, it's about having an abundant life, it's about setting boundaries and acting on the behalf of your highest self and knowing your value.” - Marni Battista
“In this new dating scene post divorce I have had to rediscover who I am as a single woman and what I want in a new relationship moving forward.” - Nikki Spo
“If you have dignity, self worth, and self respect and you have the actual tools to communicate appropriately, dating is actually kind of fun.” - Marni Battista
“At this point in my life, men now are competing with my peace. I love myself so much and so if somebody else loves me, that's just icing on the cake” - Nikki Spo
“You’re creating your soul's journey for a reason, wake up and listen. - Marni Battista
“People tend to rule out before they rule in and my invitation is to rule in before you rule out. Let a guy rule himself out.” - Marni Battista
Timestamps:
0:00 - 3:55 | Intro
3:55 - 5:35 | What is Dating with Dignity
5:35 - 10:05 | What damages our dignity
10:05 - 15:15 | Finding your self worth
15:15 - 19:25 | Learning the lessons
19:25 - 21:17 | Deep reflection
21:17 - 27:05 | Core values & Non-negotiables
27:05 - 30:40 | The checklist
30:40 - 33:45 | Re-entering the dating world
33:45 - 37:00 | NOT being a pick me
37:00 - 42:50 | Living courageously
42:50 - 45:00 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Marni Battista
Institute for Living Courageously / Dating with Dignity
@marnibattista_
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Welcome back to part 2 with Dr. Kat Vigo. Today we are talking about the thing no one really talks about: sex after you have a baby… Tune in to find out more!
In this episode…
Quotes
“Returning to intimacy after having a baby does not necessitate penetration and everyone thinks that.” - Dr. Kat Vigo
“There are plenty of reasons why a postpartum vagina is not set up for success sexually.” - Dr. Kat Vigo
“Our brains are largely rewired during and after pregnancy and it’s 100% focused on keeping that new baby alive.” - Dr. Kat Vigo
“We as women should be having the best sex of our lives throughout our lives.” - Nikki Spo
“The more we talk about these things the more people are able to ultimately come home to themselves, to feel happy and secure in their bodies and minds, and so that they can go and thrive and be the best versions of themselves.”
Timestamps:
0:00 - 1:25 - | Intro
1:25 - 2:50 | Sex after having a baby
2:50 - 4:35 | Societal / male pressure
4:35 - 5:40 | Postpartum changes
5:40 - 9:45 | Progesterone & estrogen
9:45 - 13:20 | A healthy vagina for intercourse
13:20 - 16:46 | Rest & digest postpartum
16:46 - 21:55 | Do vaginas go back to normal?
21:55 - 24:20 | Making sense out of a postpartum vagina
24:20 - 28:15 | Health concerns
28:15 - 29:20 | Hope & healing
29:20 - 31:50 | What holds women back from having these hard convos
31:50 - 34:13 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Dr. Kat Vigo
https://painlesspregnancy.com/
@painlesspregnancy
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Welcome back fam to PART 2 of Divorce & Co-parenting with Michelle Dempsey-Multack. If you have not checked out part 1 it is sooo good. Anybody who is going through a divorce or separation or if you know somebody who is, I highly recommend you checking out part 1. Today we are getting started with part 2 so let's do this!
In this episode…
Quotes
“You gotta make sure you’re with somebody you want and not somebody you need.” - Michelle Dempsey-Multack
“Co-parenting is underrated, it's made me a better parent.” - Nikki Spo
“You really have to understand the difference between guilt and shame. Are you guilty of doing something bad or do you feel ashamed because somewhere along the line you believed you weren’t allowed to have your own identity as a mother or a person.” - Michelle Dempsey-Multack
“Social media has become so black and white but when it comes to divorce you have to live in the gray. Get comfortable in the gray as a co-parent because that's your life” - Michelle Dempsey-Multack
“What good co-parenting is is supporting your child's relationship with the other parent, staying in your lane and letting them be the parent they need to be, and following your parenting plan. It doesn’t need to be more difficult than that.” - Michelle Dempsey-Multack
Timestamps:
0:00 - 1:25 | Intro
1:25 - 6:05 | Staying empowered
6:05 - 11:40 | Co-parenting is UNDERRATED
11:40 - 21:05 | Addressing social media hate
21:05 - 25:55 | Finding your co-parenting groove
25:55 - 30:15 | The importance of introducing new partners to your children
30:15 - 32:33 | Outro
—
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Michelle
https://momsmovingon.com/about/
@themichelledempsey
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Fam fam. This week we are joined by Michelle Dempsey-Multack who has helped me come to my own sense of deep inner knowing as a divorced woman and co-parenting mother.
Michelle is a certified divorce and co-parenting specialist, a best selling author of “Moms Moving On,” and is an educator for divorce coaches. She is known for her ability to inspire and empower moms through their divorce and co-parenting journeys.
This is a two part series you don’t want to miss out on.
In this episode…
Quotes
“We paint people to be the villains and we want to be the victim ourselves because it’s so much easier.” - Michelle Dempsey Multack
“My mission is to keep the child at the center and not put them in the middle.” - Michelle Dempsey Multack
“The parenting plan is not for the parents and that’s what everyone forgets.” - Michelle Dempsey Multack
“To see parents who might not have been as involved during the marriage show the f*** up and rally in parenthood is truly amazing.” - Nikki Spo
Timestamps:
0:00 - 5:30 | Intro
5:30 - 9:30 | Michelle’s divorce journey
9:30 - 11:10 | Separating
11:10 - 14:44 | Explaining co-parenting to children
14:44 - 16:35 | Moms moving on
16:35 - 19:40 | Keeping your child in the center and not the middle
19:40 - 21:05 | Helping people see past the pain
21:05 - 24:20 | Modifying expectations
24:20 - 28:25 | Mom & dad
28:25 - 29:34 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Michelle
https://momsmovingon.com/about/
themichelledempsey
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
What’s up fam! I am sooo excited to share some news with you guys. I am going to be hosting a mastermind with my good friend Jamie Ruiz this Friday, August 2nd at 12pm EST. Jamie is a manifestation and life coach and is now helping thousands of women achieve their life goals and dreams.
https://www.alchemic-acquisition.com/nikkispo881844
Now for today's episode of The Know, we have Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri and I diving deep into narcissism and its effects within a family dynamic. Tune in to find out more!
In this episode…
Quotes
“You can not have an identity for yourself if you want to be a part of a family that is narcissistic.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“I feel that narcissists would like to believe they are immortal. Cognitively they know they are going to die so they need somebody who can continue their legacy which falls onto a child.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“The scapegoat children are most likely to wind up as victims in relationships and are prime to be a partner of a narcissist because of their upbringing.” - Nikki Spo
“Let’s not keep revisiting the trauma. Let's really heal from the emotions that the trauma left behind.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“The peacekeeper child becomes a people pleaser and learns to put themselves last and never take care of themselves.” - Nikki Spo
“We should not be placing adult responsibilities, emotional or physical, on children.” - Nikki Spo
Timestamps:
0:00 - 2:45 | Mastermind
2:45 - 4:35 | Intro
4:35 - 9:00 | Family roles
9:00 - 13:25 | The Golden Child
13:25 - 20:15 | The Scapegoat Child
20:15 - 25:30 | Trauma from family origin & IFS
25:30 - 29:15 | The Peacekeeper Child
29:15 - 32:10 | The Personal Assistant Child
32:10 - 35:05 | The Invisible Child
35:05 - 41:25 | The Truth Seer & Truth Teller Children
41:25 - 43:00 | The Adherent Child
43:00 - 46:35 | Moving away from making choices out of habit
46:35 - 49:07 | Outro
–
https://ifs-institute.com/
https://ifs-institute.com/nobadparts
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
https://buxanicare.com/rachna-buxani-mirpuri/
@bruxanicare
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
What is up fam! Today I am welcoming back Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri who we have heard from a few times now on the topic of narcissism. This is part three of a multi-part series in which Dr. Rachna and I are discussing the topic of narcissism. I am really honored to be able to chat with an expert like her and today we are going to be answering some of the spicy Q & A’s that have been sent in after our first two initial episodes. Let’s jump right in!
In this episode…
Quotes
“Not everybody who’s divorcing a narcissist knows that the person is narcissistic.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“A lot of narcissistic characteristics are reinforced by society.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“Narcissism inherently comes from insecurity, insecurity brings shame, and shame takes a form of rage.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“There is no way to have a healthy relationship with a narcissist.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
“I think it takes a lot of self-reflection to ask yourself what you are really longing for in friendships and in general. Ask yourself what gives your life meaning, what gives your life purpose, and what makes you feel happy and fulfilled out of your interpersonal relationships.” - Nikki Spo
“The boundaries you set are really for yourself and not for them.” - Nikki Spo
“You have to not exist to be a part of these narcissistic relationships.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
Timestamps:
0:00 - 3:00 | Intro
3:00 - 4:50 | How do narcissists react to divorce?
4:50 - 7:30 | Therapy with a narcissist
7:30 - 10:15 | How to treat someone with narcissistic personality traits
10:15 - 12:20 | Self confidence
12:20 - 15:45 | Insecurity, shame, rage
15:45 - 18:30 | Experiencing narcissism with a friend
18:30 - 21:30 | Setting boundaries for YOURSELF
21:30 - 26:55 | A narcissistic boss
26:55 - 28:10 | The word “charming”
28:10 - 32:15 | Victimizing
32:15 - 35:30 | How do you deal with narcissists who body shame you
35:30 - 40:15 | What is it like to co-parent with a narcissist
40:15 - 47:45 | How to get a narcissist to apologize
47:45 - 49:28 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri
https://buxanicare.com/rachna-buxani-mirpuri/
@bruxanicare
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Welcome backkkk ladies and gents- I am so excited to host somebody who I have worked with for a long time and who has become one of my close friends over these past few years, Dr. Kat Vigo.
Dr. Kat is the founder of Painless Pregnancy, which provides physical therapy to women throughout every stage of their motherhood journeys. Dr. Kat earned a bachelors and doctorate of physical therapy degrees from the University of Florida and has worked in the hospital setting for the first decade of her career. Get ready because we are going to talk about it ALL!
In this episode…
Quotes
“For a pregnant body, we should have the same expectations that a man does. You can be fit and healthy and do what you wanna do while being pregnant.” - Dr. Kat Vigo
“A female body is made to grow a baby.” - Dr. Kat Vigo
“If you’re experiencing postpartum anxiety or depression you are in this dark cloud that you don’t even know you’re in.” - Nikki Spo
“When it comes to a first time post pregnancy experience, you don’t know what you don’t know until you figure it out or until somebody tells you, and that's no one's fault.” - Nikki Spo
“I think that when women and men and parents in general are more informed they can make better decisions about their future and their birth plans.” - Nikki Spo
Timestamps:
0:00 - 3:15 | Intro
3:15 - 7:40 | Can pregnancy really be painless?
7:40 - 10:40 | Alleviating discomforts
10:40 - 17:25 | Pitocin
17:25 - 22:20 | Kat’s birthing experience
22:20 - 25:35 | Postpartum
23:35 - 31:45 | How to heal our female bodies
31:45 - 35:25 | Disassociating from your vagina postpartum
35:25 - 43:45 | A correct way to push for vaginal deliveries
43:45 - 45:20 | Involving the baby daddies
45:20 - 51:55 | When to start physical therapy after delivering a baby
51:55 - 53:22 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Dr. Kat Vigo
https://painlesspregnancy.com/
@painlesspregnancy
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Welcome back! I’ve been thinking a lot about social media, its impact on my life, its potential future impact on my kids' lives, and how to navigate life in a more intentional and less distracted way. So today I'm really excited for my chat with Palak Dave who is a versatile entrepreneur, speaker, and the author of "Beautiful Every Days," a guidebook to living in the here and now. I'm excited to join Palak today to discuss her transformative journey where each day offers the chance to live beautifully here in the now.
In this episode…
Quotes
“My goal is to get people to see that we don't have to completely remove the digital parts of our lives, we have to lean into things so that we can fill our cups with more of what we love and what we know we need, but we might not be doing for ourselves.” - Palak Dave
“Chances are if you're going through something there are other people going through the same thing and it's just a matter of acknowledging it and raising those topics so that people feel like they can be connected.” - Palak Dave
“Ask deep questions from a place of curiosity instead of having an outcome that you're trying to get to.” - Palak Dave
“I think that curiosity is a solution to a lot of things, even arguments. Asking for clarification for things can solve so much.” - Nikki Spo
“You can reclaim your time and have it be so it's not controlling you.” - Nikki Spo
“You can be really intentional without it having to be the f***ing Pinterest board.” - Nikki Spo
“I think a lot of us don't know what our deep inner knowing is. Like we have it, but we can't identify it. But for me it's been like a constant pull trying to pull me back home to myself.” - Nikki Spo
Timestamps:
0:00 - 2:20 | Intro
2:20 - 4:45 | Managing digital distractions
4:45 - 7:15 | Embiria
7:15 - 9:45 | Taking steps to be more social
9:45 - 14:35 | Passive connection
14:35 - 15:50 | European lifestyle
15:50 - 20:44 | Loneliness
20:44 - 22:50 | The nitty gritty
22:50 - 24:40 | Curiosity
24:40 - 32:35 | Hustle culture
32:35 - 36:25 | Strategies to stay unplugged
36:25 - 40:15 | The pinterest board stigma
40:15 - 43:30 | Nest, nourish, nature, nurture
43:30 - 44:51 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Palak Dave
https://www.embiria.ca/
@embiria / beautiful everydays
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
We are backkkkk my friends with Part 2 of Bag… SECURED featuring my bestie Jamie Ruiz. Tune in to hear the rest!
In this episode…
Quotes
“Women should be dating and getting to know multiple people. Dating doesn’t mean sleeping with people or hooking up with everybody. When I say I’m dating, I’m getting to know multiple people and I think that it;s really important to clarify that dating doesn’t mean sleeping with.” - Nikki Spo
“It’s not the trauma that the relationship brought you, it's the trauma that led you to that relationship.” - Jamie Ruiz
“Feeling not good enough while growing up transferred into all my romantic relationships for a while.” - Nikki Spo
“I have this theory that if you can take my man, have him. If my man is snatchable, take him. I don’t want that.” - Nikki Spo
“Dating since divorce has revealed to me that I still have a huge capacity for love. It did not ruin me.” - Nikki Spo
“There's something so cool about learning yourself and experiencing yourself through new people post divorce.” - Jamie Ruiz
“I’m living by this new quote now and it's that ‘I’m easy to please but hard to impress.’” - Nikki Spo
“I believe we can have it all when it comes to how we feel.” - Jamie Ruiz
Timestamps:
0:00 - 7:40 | Are you dating?!
7:40 - 11:20 | Age differences in romantic relationships
11:20 - 12:20 | Secret relationships
12:20 - 13:45 | Girls girl
13:45 - 19:35 | The Miami Heat
19:35 - 23:25 | Being in love since the divorce
23:25 - 27:05 | Dating with 3 kids
27:05 - 28:55 | More kids?!
28:55 - 35:10 | Going through a traumatic time period to heal
35:10 - 37:35 | Money
37:35 - 40:00 | Finding the good men
40:00 - 43:55 | What does Nikki want the people to know about her
43:55 - 50:05 | Jamie’s tarot reading
50:05 - 51:12 | Outro
–
SANA SKIN STUDIO is my #1 go-to spot for self-care. My favorite facial is the Super Glow, and you can get $25 off of your first facial when you book at www.sanaskinstudio.com with my code THEKNOWGLOW.
Connect with Jamie
https://www.jamieleeruiz.com/
jameslee4
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
Okay so. This week is a little different. My girl, Jamie Ruiz is here interviewing ME to get all the TEA… Jamie and I have been besties for forever and she has been a guest on The Know a few times now. She is a life coach and is helping hundreds of women achieve their goals and dreams and live the life that they have always wanted to live. But yeah. Um… she’s going in on me this week and she’s not holding back.
In this episode…
Quotes
“I don't think I fumbled any bags because my bag is peace, and when peace is involved I don’t think you’re fumbling any bags.” - Nikki Spo
“I’m interested in coming home to myself and I think a lot of people want that but they don’t know that they want it.” - Nikki Spo
“Life can be good on the other side of a sad experience.” - Nikki Spo
“Sometimes you start relationships as one version of yourself and either one person changes or both people change and you’re no longer an energetic match for each other. And that’s okay.” - Jamie Ruiz
“Things last however long they need to last and we grow into the versions of ourselves that we need to be and we make our exits where we need to make our exits.” - Jamie Ruiz
Timestamps:
0:00 - 3:20 | Intro
3:20 - 5:20 | Why Jamie is interviewing Nikki
5:20 - 12:10 | Answering the haters
12:10 - 22:29 | The struggle bus of money
22:29 - 26:40 | The Know
26:40 - 28:45 | Podcast content changing post divorce
28:45 - 34:35 | Dating
34:35 - 41:20 | Finding an outlet
41:20 - 42:36 | Outro
–
Painless Pregnancy is a group of physical therapists located in South Florida who specialize in helping pregnant and postpartum women prevent dysfunction and heal… in the comfort of their own homes. This concierge service has been a game changer for me after my third childbirth, and I am excited to partner with them and offer our Listeners 10% off their first visit with my code NikkiSpo10. Check out www.painless-pregnancy.com to book your appointment!
Connect with Jamie
https://www.jamieleeruiz.com/
jameslee4
Connect with Nikki
www.nikkispo.com
@nikkisappspo / @theknowwithnikkispo
The podcast currently has 160 episodes available.
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