The New Manager Podcast

Every day you get examples of communication. You're surrounded by it! When you think about the people you work with, who stands out as being a great communicator? Why? What are they doing -- or not doing?

This deceptively simple practice will activate your powers of observation and curiosity. You will become more intentional and less reactive, when you start where you are and learn from your direct experience of the communication around you.

In this episode you'll hear an excerpt from my course, Communication Strategies for Managers. A small idea can create big change, especially when it comes to how you communicate at work.

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

A lot of new managers tell me they're conflict avoidant and struggle to communicate directly when it feels like there's conflict brewing.

If that's you, then this episode is for you.

I've been reading a book, Dignity: The Essential Role It Plays in Resolving Conflict. The author is Dr. Donna Hicks, an Associate at the Weatherhead Center for International Affairs at Harvard University. She has worked as a conflict resolution specialist for years.

In her book, she talks about dignity violations and describes these ten essential elements of dignity:

1. Acceptance of Identity
2. Inclusion
3. Safety
4. Acknowledgment
5. Recognition
6. Fairness
7. Benefit of the Doubt
8. Understanding
9. Independence
10. Accountability

In today's episode you'll get introduced to these elements. I highly recommend reading her book in full! I've found it to be a helpful model for thinking in a new way about conflict, and how to heal from conflict.

Dignity: The Essential Role It Plays in Resolving Conflict

https://www.amazon.com/Dignity-Essential-Role-Resolving-Conflict/dp/030026142X/

Dr. Donna Hicks

https://drdonnahicks.com/

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Do you know the Eisenhower Matrix? It's a classic framework for organizing tasks and clarifying priorities. In this episode, I walk you through the basics, adding a Neurodiverse lens that makes this framework even more useful.

This is also the 200th episode of The New Manager Podcast. Wow! Thank you for listening, and being part of this.

In this episode I also share an announcement: that I will be taking a break. After 200 episodes, it's time to pause and take some time to think about what to create next for you and this show.

More about the Eisenhower Matrix:

https://untools.co/eisenhower-matrix/

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you're conflict avoidant, or grew up as the peace-maker in your family or friend group, then save this episode! You probably have a gut sense that conflict is bad, and must be prevented. But did you know that conflict can actually be an indicator of psychological safety?

Conflict is a normal part of human relationships. What's important is what kind of conflict it is, and how you handle it. Let's discuss!

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

You must find out how things work. One of the most common misconceptions is, "If I just do good work, it will be recognized and rewarded." When you don't question your assumptions about process --how things work -- it leaves you with blind spots you don't realize are holding you back!

Here's a simple three step framework that can help you:

1. What do you want? Make a list of all the things.
2. How do you think it works? Write down the story of how you think those things happen.
3. Verify! Get curious, talk to people, and get new perspectives and info to update your assumption.

You must take an active role in asking and finding out! Do not expect your manager to initiate this knowledge transfer. Do know wait for HR to tell you how it works.

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

There's a perspective shift that happens when you step into a manager and leadership role. Instead of thinking, "I have to do it all", you begin to take a bigger view and ask, "How can all this get done?"

You'll be thinking about how work is allocated, and what are the different strengths and qualities you have on the team. You'll start thinking about what strengths you and the team need to develop. And you'll make decisions about delegating and prioritizing work.

See this as part of the skill set you will develop. And have some grace for yourself, if you feel a struggle to know when and how to delegate rather than just do it all yourself. Let's discuss!

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

It's December now, and I'm feeling reflective about time passing. So, in today's episode I share some ideas to encourage your own reflection, and how doing so can help you show up more grounded at work.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Upstream: Selected Essays by Mary Oliver https://maryoliver.com/prose/

If you're a fan of Mary Oliver, go listen to this iterview she gave back in 2015:

https://onbeing.org/programs/mary-oliver-i-got-saved-by-the-beauty-of-the-world/

Year Compass: https://yearcompass.com/en/

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

The end of the year is a great time do a personal Year in Review. I'm using the Year Compass, and will share some of the questions to get you started. Let's discuss!

Download your own free Year Compass workbook: https://yearcompass.com/en/

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In the course of your career, you're likely to encounter some toxic traits at work. These can show up in any relationship and undermine trust, making it harder to work well together.

The first step is to simply become aware of them:

1. Criticism / Blame
2. Contempt
3. Defensiveness
4. Stonewalling

To address this, you'll need to:

1. Increase your skill & capacity for dealing with conflict
2. Be responsive, rather than reactive

Let's discuss!

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

It's the end of the year -- you might be feeling some overwhelm! In this episode I walk you through a mindfulness practice to try when you want to feel more grounded and calm. Let's discuss!

**After the Episode**

Enroll in Communication Skills for Managers:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Private coaching:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://kimnicol.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow me on LinkedIn:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Become a more calm and confident leader:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠