To 50 and Beyond | Midlife and Alcohol-Free Lifestyle

Episode 297

Are you planning a vacation and want to stay alcohol-free but feeling unsure if you can manage it?

I've been there too. When I stopped drinking, I struggled with the idea that a vacation could be enjoyable without alcohol. For me, alcohol and vacation were intertwined in my belief of what made a trip fun.

It took one sober trip to realize that vacations could be just as enjoyable without alcohol.

In this episode, I share seven of my favorite tips for preparing for a sober vacation, along with strategies to help you stay on track during and after your trip.

• Why we associate vacations with alcohol and how to change the associations one trip at at time

• My first sober travel experience and what I learned

• The benefits I've experienced from traveling without drinking: Keeping my wits about me, longer (slow) days I remember, and not needing a vacation from my vacation.

• Seven tips to help you prepare for your vacation before you leave:

  1. Define your purpose of the trip.

  2. Get clear on what challenges you are concerned about to create a plan when/if they come up.

  3. Communicate your intentions not to drink with a travel buddy or someone at home.

  4. Focus on Nourishment

  5. Invest in something to carry with you as a reminder of your intention to stay a/f.

  6. Write down you reasons why you don't want to drink and make an "if this, then that" plan that you can carry with you.

  7. Write a Dear Me letter to open when you return. In this letter, you will talk about how you experienced your vacation without drinking and how grateful and proud of yourself you are.

You are not alone if you're not that excited about alcohol-free vacations, but I want you to know that if you are choosing not to drink on vacation when you would normally - it is a badass move that can be life-changing.

If you need extra sobriety support, join us inside Team Alcohol-Free before enrollment closes on 7/1/24.

Inside The Team this summer, we are kicking off our First Annual Sober Gal Summer Camp on July 15th.

Episode 296

free download.

This episode is for the Sober Gal who wants to spend her summer with that Sober Gal vibe - freedom from alcohol.

Freedom to do more things SHE wants to do.

Invest and give herself back the time, money, and energy alcohol took from her and have fun on her own this summer - no alcohol required.

➡️Do you feel like you're missing out because you don't have a glass of alcohol when you're sitting on your patio?

➡️Are you starting to give yourself a summer pass for drinking because you're on vacation?

➡️Saying things like - I'm traveling internationally; alcohol doesn't count?

➡️Are you doubtful that you will be able to show up at BBQs and get-togethers and say, I'm not drinking?

I totally get it! I felt this way when I stopped drinking in August of 2013.

But hold up before you grant yourself a drinking pass because it's summer, and listen in while I share what's in and out for Sober Gals during our one-and-only summer of 2024.

I had the same summer experience for decades and I didn't realize it until I stopped drinking.

Different year. Same old stuff. Alcohol-centered, not me-centered that is why I'm creating the very first Sober Gal Summer in 2024!

• An explanation of what it means to have a Sober Gal Summer: it's a mindset, an attitude, and a celebration of elevated self-care regimes and rewards. Both tangible and intangible. Think freedom, peace, and being present.

• Why summer is a challenging time to stay sober for most midlife women

• A list of What's In and What's Out for Sober Gals this summer (hint: what's in: pleasing ourselves first)

• How to create your In and Out Sober Gal Summer list by using my free download.

• My mission to bring our midlife community together this summer to build more confidence in ourselves and our choice to be free from alcohol.

If you're ready to make 2024 the summer of you.

Join us inside Team Alcohol-Free and get the inspiration, support, and fun you deserve this summer.

Inside The Team this summer, we are kicking off our First Annual Sober Gal Summer Camp on July 15th.

Enrollment closes July 31, 2024, until Fall.

Join today!

Episode 295

In this episode, I share my personal journey and experiences with sobriety, addressing the common question: When does sobriety stop being hard?

I've shared my story since the beginning of this podcast. I had a tough time in the first and second years. I went it on my own. In 2013, I didn't know about podcasts or books about sobriety.

Change and transition are tough, even if you appreciate change in your life. When we're talking about our bond with alcohol and transitioning out of having it in our lives, it's tough.

No matter how much or how long you spend drinking, we all face a challenge when we quit, but we don't all feel the same way.

Here is the good news - if you are going alcohol-free today, you have many wonderful resources that offer hope and support, from in-person groups to online. It's a GREAT time to get sober in midlife and in this day and age.

I'm here to give you hope and suggestions to help you through the hard moments.

Always remember that time is your best friend when it comes to overcoming challenges in early sobriety. Be patient with yourself.

• Why it's important to stay in your lane and not compare your sobriety to anyone else.

• The importance of having realistic expectations about the time it takes to recover.

• Strategies to help you through the hard parts of early sobriety and beyond.

• Why physical activity and music can change your attitude and mood in a short amount of time.

• How to implement creative outlets like gardening, creating vision boards, and doing puzzles to keep you occupied during moments when you want to drink but want to stay sober.

• The importance of finding a supportive community that keeps you on track, inspired, and motivated.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Daily Sobriety ToolkitJoin Team Alcohol-Free

Q & A Series

The Hardest Part of Getting Sober

Wondering if Your Drinking Isn't "Bad Enough" to Quit?

The Benefits of Staying Sober When You're Alone

Starting Over on Day One

How I Managed My Anxiety When I Quit Drinking

Episode 294

In this episode, I'm answering a question from a To 50 and Beyond listener, Maggie.

Maggie sent me an email and said: I've heard you talk about your social anxiety when you were 14 and started drinking as you got older. Did having anxiety hold you back from quitting drinking? And how did you manage it once you stopped drinking?

Anxiety has been one of the most difficult things I've had to experience and manage throughout my life. I didn't talk to a doctor about my anxiety until I was in my 40s. I wanted to hide it. Pretend like I had everything together, and even during public panic attacks in my 20's and 30's, I would say, "I'm fine."

I wasn't anything but fine for decades, and I used alcohol to take away my anxiety so I would feel better.

• When and why did my anxiety start at eleven after losing my dad.

• Why I first started drinking at the age of 14 - to fit in and lessen my social shyness.

• Where my anxiety comes from (hint: I was trying to control my anxiety, not manage it with drinking).

• How I approached the "anxiety roadblock" that held me back from going alcohol-free.

• The basics that I stuck to in early sobriety, and today, that help me manage my anxiety.

If you are someone who experiences anxiety and using alcohol to cope, I understand how you feel.

Alcohol is not a sustainable approach to anxiety. I learned this after I quit drinking.

There is help for you and support. You are not alone.

I felt alone in my anxiety for far too long. I'm with you.

Thank you for listening!

Mentioned in this episode:

The Daily Sobriety ToolkitJoin Team Alcohol-Free

Please contact me if you have a topic for the podcast or need a friend.

Q & A Series

The Hardest Part of Getting Sober

Wondering if Your Drinking Isn't "Bad Enough" to Quit?

The Benefits of Staying Sober When You're Alone

Starting Over on Day One

If you liked this episode and want to take a few minutes to support the podcast, I encourage you to leave a positive rating and review on Apple Podcasts.

So many women out there don't know there is an "alcohol-free" option and are struggling with their drinking.

Your support will help these women find the podcast this week and learn about an alcohol-free lifestyle later in life.

➡️Click here, scroll to the bottom of the page, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review."

I read my reviews and will hug you when I see yours.

Make sure to "follow" To 50 and Beyond to get all the wonderful episodes coming your way. If you don't click "follow," you will miss hearing what's coming up.

Thank you!

Episode 293

Day One. There is so much possibility there. I love day one!

I don't love how "starting over" can make you feel when you are working so hard at staying sober in midlife.

In this episode, I discuss the feeling of starting over and how you can feel and reframe it. I also share my experience of starting over on Day One for the last time.

If you are in a program where resetting your clock is required, stick to your program. This episode is for the gal who is DIYing sobriety like I did.

If you're tired of going back and forth with your drinking, I understand how you feel. I've got you!

During this episode, you'll hear:

• How to track your progress in a way that feels good to you and helps you stay sober

• Why tracking didn't work for me, and how some of the women I know and have worked with track their sobriety progress

• What to do the day after a "slip" to make sure you don't drink (and why this matters)

• My story about having 45 days of sobriety and going back to drinking during a family brunch

• Lots of love and encouragement for persevering on your road to alcohol freedom!

Mentioned in this episode:

TAF sobriety app suggestions: I am Sober, Recovery Path, Since, Try Dry, Reframe.

The Daily Sobriety Toolkit

Join Team Alcohol-Free

Plan A Private Coaching

Q & A episodes:

The Hardest Part of Getting Sober

Wondering if Your Drinking Isn't "Bad Enough" to Quit?

The Benefits of Staying Sober when You're Alone

If you liked this episode and want to take a few minutes to support the podcast, I want to encourage you to leave a positive rating and review on Apple Podcasts.

So many women out there don't know there is an "alcohol-free" option and are struggling with their drinking.

Your support will help these women find the podcast this week and learn about an alcohol-free lifestyle later in life.

➡️Click here, scroll to the bottom of the page, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review."

I read my reviews and will hug you when I see yours.

Make sure to "follow" To 50 and Beyond to get all of the wonderful episodes coming your way. If you don't click "follow," you will miss hearing what's coming up.

Thank you!

Episode 292

I enjoyed drinking alone, and I know that being alone can be a challenge when you stop drinking.

Whether you live alone or find drinking alone an enjoyable "reward," but you don't want to continue drinking, this episode is for you.

Today, I'm answering a question from a To 50 and Beyond listener, Kim, as part of my six-week Q&A series.

Kim sent me an email saying:

I go about 30 days without drinking but find it hard to keep it going, mainly because I live alone. No one will know if I drink, so I often give in and tell myself—I'll have just a little (you know how this goes) or just because I'm bored or miss my nightly glasses of wine. How do I break this habit of giving in because of feeling this way?

In this episode, I discuss the benefits of staying sober alone in midlife: building more trust, pride, confidence, and patience with yourself when you stay true to what you want more than alcohol.

I share suggestions to help you if you're feeling lonely, bored, or in the habit of rewarding yourself with alcohol to create new rituals for yourself.

My message to you is that you are not the only one who feels like drinking alone is enjoyable or lives alone and finds it hard not to give in. "I'll just have one."

Give yourself time and lots of love and kindness to help you find new ways to manage your daily life without drinking alcohol.

I'm with you 100%!

Please contact me if you have a topic for the podcast or need a friend.

Thank you for listening!

Mentioned in this episode:

The Daily Sobriety ToolkitJoin Team Alcohol-Free

If you liked this episode and want to take a few minutes to support the podcast, I encourage you to leave a positive rating and review on Apple Podcasts.

So many women out there don't know there is an "alcohol-free" option and are struggling with their drinking.

Your support will help these women find the podcast this week and learn about an alcohol-free lifestyle later in life.

➡️Click here, scroll to the bottom of the page, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review."

Make sure to "follow" To 50 and Beyond to get all the wonderful episodes coming your way. If you don't click "follow," you will miss hearing what's coming up.

Thank you!

Episode 291

Today, I'm answering the question: What if my drinking isn't "bad enough" to quit?

I've heard this question from midlife women for years and asked myself this question for two years.

f you are on the verge of going alcohol-free but aren't 100% certain that your drinking is at a place where you "need" to remove alcohol completely, this is the episode for you.

Even though my drinking was considered "bad enough" to quit on paper and in my heart, it didn't mean that I stopped. For two years, I tried to justify and compare my drinking to others whose drinking was worse than mine.

The purpose of this episode is to share some good news - you don't have to measure your drinking by "bad" to go alcohol-free.

I've got you, friend!

During this episode, you'll hear:

• My story and reasons why I was trying to moderate my drinking and make alcohol "work"

• What I envisioned of someone who had to quit drinking, and why I resisted being a sober woman

• Why the consequences of my drinking and others doesn't make it easier to quit drinking

• The good news! Why you don't have to measure your choice to quit drinking by labels or by comparing yourself to others

• How Gray Area drinking plays a role in our choice to stop drinking on our own accord

• The questions you can ask yourself if you are wondering if your drinking isn't "bad enough" to quit

Ask yourself these questions to learn more about where you are with your drinking and where you want to be:

1. Why are you wondering if your drinking isn't bad enough to quit? Is it to validate quitting or continuing to drink?

2. If my drinking is not bad enough, how bad does it have to get? When is enough enough?

3. What is holding you back from going alcohol-free?

4. What if you allow yourself to create an alcohol-free lifestyle not because your drinking is bad but because YOU want better and different than what alcohol gives you?

Don't compare how you feel about alcohol and your drinking to anyone else - including me. Stay in your lane because that is where you will figure it out. 👊🏻

Mentioned in this episode:

The Hardest Part of Getting Sober

Email me with a question you would like me to answer.

How I can help you:

The Daily Sobriety Toolkit

Join Team Alcohol-Free

Plan A Private Coaching

If you liked this episode and want to take a few minutes to support the podcast, I want to encourage you to leave a positive rating and review on Apple Podcasts.

So many women out there don't know there is an "alcohol-free" option and are struggling with their drinking.

Your support will help these women find the podcast this week and learn about an alcohol-free lifestyle later in life.

➡️Click here, scroll to the bottom of the page, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review."

I read my reviews and will hug you when I see yours.

Make sure to "follow" To 50 and Beyond to receive all the wonderful episodes. If you don't click "follow," you will miss out on what's coming up.

Thank you!

If you have a question you would like answered on the podcast, send me an email!

Episode 290

If you are a gal in midlife who is questioning her drinking and having a hard time getting sober, I'm with you.

In this episode, I answer a client's question: What was the hardest part of getting sober for you?

After she asked me this question, I didn't hesitate. The hardest part for me was deciding to stop drinking.

I spent two years feeling stuck in decision fatigue and putting in lots of effort to make alcohol work. On August 11, 2013, I decided to go all in on what I wanted more than drinking alcohol.

In this episode, you will hear:

• How and why I decided to stop drinking

• My take on what it means to "get sober"

• Why it's difficult to decide to quit drinking (spoiler alert: it's not you, it's alcohol)

• The fears that I faced in going alcohol-free, which are shared among many women in midlife

• What it takes to go "all-in" on freeing yourself from alcohol

My message to you…

If you are having difficulty deciding right now, take a walk with yourself and map out a plan. Maybe now isn't the time to take this on, and that's okay - you can't force yourself to get sober - you will figure it out, and you're on your way. I

If you're ready to go all in, you can do it. I believe in you. Be kind and patient with yourself and take it day to day.

Thank you for listening!

Mentioned in this episode:

The Daily Sobriety Toolkit

Join Team Alcohol-Free

Episode 289

Hey there, friend!

This episode comes straight from my heart and is for the moms and grandmas of the world who feel regretful about their drinking.

I share what becoming a mom was like, how I started drinking the day I came home from the hospital, and why I quit drinking for myself, not my son, but stay sober for him today.

I also talk about how I'm living with the regret of my drinking as a mom.

In honor of Mother's Day and where I am today on my motherhood road, I wanted to talk about this topic to let you know you are not alone.

My favorite thing I said in this episode (yes, I'm quoting myself) is: I have never regretted the decision to stop drinking.

Thank you for being here.

I appreciate you!

How I can help you:

Download The Daily Sobriety Toolkit.

Schedule a Discovery Session to enroll in private coaching.

Get coaching and make new friends inside Team Alcohol-Free.

Bonus episode

Hello friend!

I'm popping in today to share with you a new free resource I created, The Daily Sobriety Toolkit.

I'm so excited to share this toolkit with you!

The Daily Sobriety Toolkit is your trusted companion to help you plan your day and stay connected to the reason why you are choosing yourself over alcohol today. Not forever.

You can grab your toolkit here.

Thank you for listening!

I will be on a break until May 8, 2024. See you back here then.

Do you need extra support in going and staying alcohol-free?

Learn more about my community, Team Alcohol-Free.

To learn more about myself and my coaching, visit my website here.