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CNC (Consensual Non-Consent) is often discussed from a woman’s perspective, but what about men? In this episode, I’m joined by Dotch, a Somatica® practitioner who once saw CNC as a hard limit but has since learned to enjoy facilitating these fantasies. Dotch shares his journey, from initial discomfort to embracing CNC in a way that feels safer, consensual, and exciting. We discuss the challenges men face, including shame and the fear of crossing boundaries, and offer insights on how to explore CNC responsibly. Tune in for a thoughtful, candid conversation on navigating CNC from a man’s point of view.

Mentioned in this Episode

• Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)
• Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)
• Somatica®
• Somatica® BDSM Mastery Course
• Emily Tesh - Some Desperate Glory (book)

Contact 

• Sexandmischief.coach (Dotch’s website)
• Harleyrabbit.com (My website)
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
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In this episode, Harley Rabbit delves into attachment theory and its relevance to the kink community. The discussion covers the four main attachment styles: secure, avoidant, anxious, and disorganized, exploring how these styles affect relationships and personal dynamics. Harley emphasizes the importance of understanding these attachment styles to foster self-awareness and compassion, and discusses the potential for developing an earned secure attachment through personal growth and therapy. The episode concludes with an invitation to an upcoming workshop on consensual non-consent play (written by AI).

Mentioned in this Episode

• Book a Connection Call
• My Services 
• Polysecure - by Jessica Fern (book)
• Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)
• Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode, Harley Rabbit delves into the concept of intimacy within the kink and BDSM communities, challenging common misconceptions that equate kink with violence and degradation. Harley emphasizes that true intimacy in kink is built on trust, vulnerability, and open communication. The discussion explores various forms of intimacy that can arise in kink, including the exploration of personal limits and the importance of aftercare. Harley also shares personal experiences that highlight how kink can foster deeper connections and accelerate feelings of intimacy between partners.

If you are interested in exploring some CNC roleplays with a trusted partner, I am hosting an online workshop in October. You can get tickets here:

Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)

Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
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I got up to some exciting kinky shenanigans this weekend and I can’t wait to share! Slade and I did our most elaborate roleplay yet, which was a CNC schoolgirl fantasy. This has been a fantasy of mine for a long time, and was also my first time exploring middlespace. In this episode I share the details of the roleplay and what I learned, as well as how it felt to explore a more complicated for of ageplay where I was actually getting to sooth some old wounds using the repetition with agency pathway. 

If you are interested in exploring some CNC roleplays with a trusted partner, I am hosting an online workshop in October. You can get tickets here:

Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)

Mentioned in this episode 

• Join my mailing list here
• 3 Part Trauma Mini-Series
  • #44: When Bad Feels Really Good - kink is NOT Abuse
  • #45: The Truth About Turn Ons
  • #46: Strength in Darkness - Soothing Trauma with BDSM
• Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

Follow me:

• Fetlife
• Instagram
• SubscribeStar

Visit my website harleyrabbit.com

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In this episode, I talk with Jeanne Baade, a sex and relationship coach who discovered her sexuality later in life after growing up in a conservative christian household. Jeanne shares how she first experienced a clitoral orgasm at 48, and her journey into kink and BDSM. We explore simple ways for beginners to dip their toe into BDSM, like using blindfolds, scarves and rope harnesses to build trust and connection with a partner.

Jeanne’s humour and storytelling make this conversation both insightful and engaging, offering relatable advice for anyone curious about exploring kink. Whether you're new to BDSM or looking to reignite your relationship, Jeanne’s wisdom provides a welcoming introduction to this world.

Mentioned in this episode

• Intimate Unicorn website
• Follow Jeanne on Instagram @intimateunicorn 
• Follow Jeanne on Facebook 
• Obedience (app)
• Come Together - Emily Nagoski
• Come As You Are - Emily Nagoski 

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
• Instagram
• SubscribeStar

Visit my website harleyrabbit.com

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In this episode, we’re diving into a topic that might not be the sexiest, but it’s crucial for anyone exploring their sexuality, especially in non-monogamous relationships. I’m joined by Dr. Sara Whitburn, a General Practitioner specialising in sexual health and the Deputy Medical Director at Sexual Health Victoria, to tackle all the awkward questions about STIs.

We’ll be covering what you need to know about common STIs, including what you should be testing for and how often. Dr. Sara answers those burning questions like, “How risky is oral sex without condoms?” and “Can I get genital herpes if my partner gives me oral with a cold sore?” 

If you have an active sx life with multiple partners, or just want to stay informed, this episode is a must-listen. Being educated about STIs allows us to make informed decisions about the risks we’re willing to take and how we negotiate boundaries with our partners.

Mentioned in this episode

• Sexual Health Victoria website
• Herpes Foundation New Zealand
• Better Health Channel (sexual communication)
• Sexual Health Victoria on Instagram (@sexualhealthvictoria)
• Sexual Health Victoria on Youtube
• Sexual Health Victoria on TikTok (@shvic.org.au)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
• Instagram
• SubscribeStar

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One of the most common challenges people experience in their sex life is issues with libido. Whether it's a mismatch with their partner's libido or a sudden drop-off, these issues can be frustrating and confusing. In today's episode, I introduce a controversial exercise called “Keeping Your Pilot Light On.” This exercise focuses on finding ways to comfortably tap into your arousal in your day-to-day life, outside of the bedroom.

We delve into the ethical questions this topic brings up, particularly regarding sexual fantasies and keeping them separate from reality. It's an important discussion for anyone on their kink journey, providing valuable insights and practical advice on maintaining a healthy and balanced approach to arousal.

Mentioned in this episode

• Private Coaching with Harley 
• Book a free 15min Connection Call with Harley 
• Somatica® Institute
• The Erotic Mind - Jack Morin PhD (book)

Contact 

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
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Get ready for part 2 of our conversation about men’s profiles on Fetlife. If you're a man on Fetlife struggling to represent yourself authentically, these episodes provide invaluable tips and advice on how to do just that. 

In today’s episode, Slade shares how he implemented the changes we discussed last week, including doing his first writing, updating and refining his bio, and being more intentional about his photos. Finally, we explore Slade's vision for using Fetlife as a platform to genuinely connect with the kinky community, rather than just another form of social media.

Mentioned in this episode

• Follow WereDom_Slade on Fetlife 
• Slade’s writing What I Wish I Knew Starting out as a Dom
• BDSM test
• Harley Rabbit’s Fetlife Mastering Your Profile Package

Contact 

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

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• Fetlife
• Instagram
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Ok guys, if you're on Fetlife and not having much luck with the ladies… How much effort have you really put into your profile? Be honest! In this episode, I'm joined by my Dom and long-term partner, Slade, as we dive into men's profiles. Slade himself is guilty of not keeping his profile updated, and like many men, has a lot more to offer than his current profile showcases. Together, we go through his profile piece by piece, incorporating valuable input from female Fetlife users about the red and green flags they look for when connecting with men on Fetlife.

Tune in for practical tips and insights that will help you revamp your profile and increase your chances of finding meaningful connections.

Mentioned in this episode

• Follow WereDom_Slade on Fetlife 
• DaemonDanes (Fetlife profile) 

Contact 

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

xx Harley 🐰

Follow me:

• Fetlife
• Instagram
• SubscribeStar

Visit my website harleyrabbit.com

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If you are interested in rope bondage, you need to listen to this episode! Ravel is an experienced rigger from Brisbane Australia, who understands that rope is so much more than just technical skill. With a background in theatre, dance and performing arts, Ravel talks about bringing intention to your rope scenes - that is, knowing what kind of experience and emotions you are wanting to cultivate, before you even touch a rope. Throughout the episode, Ravel offers loads of practical tips and ideas, as well as talks about the subtlety of non-verbal communication during a rope scene. I am so excited to share some of Ravel’s wisdom and experience on my show. Do not miss this one! 

Mentioned in this episode

• Follow Ravel on Instagram (@ravel_shibari) 
• Episode #53 - about my experience tying with Ravel 
• Lucero - rigger
• Red Rigger - Brisbane Bondage and Wax Play Specialists 
• Anne Bogart - The Viewpoints Book PDF (free download)
• Miss Gen (Evil Girls HQ rope school in Brisbane)
• Somatics for Rope Bottoms by Natasha Nawataeko (book)
• A Director Prepares - by Anne Bogart (book)
• And Then You Act - by Anne Bogart (book)

Contact 

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

xx Harley 🐰

Follow me:

• Fetlife
• Instagram
• SubscribeStar

Visit my website harleyrabbit.com