An update on the case of Christina Pierce. This episode was created based off pulling together a variety of public information. 

If you are listening to this podcast and have $1 to donate, please donate to Christina's GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-bring-christinas-children-home

You can follow Christina here: https://www.instagram.com/singlemamamagic

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Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode explores the nuance of the the cycle of abuse. Abuse is not always as clear-cut as physical violence; it often wears the mask of manipulation, control, and psychological harm. It's important to understand that abuse comes in many forms – belittling comments, gaslighting (making you doubt your reality), isolation from friends or family, financial control – these are all red flags signaling an unhealthy dynamic.

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Social media platforms are notorious for their bite-sized content designed to grab attention quickly. However, this format often lacks nuance and depth. In the context of relationship advice like Todd's post, there’s no room to address individual circumstances or acknowledge that what works for one couple may be detrimental to another.

For those entangled in abusive dynamics—where manipulation skews perceptions—it’s essential to dissect whether compliance serves love or perpetuates control. It isn't about rejecting cooperation within a partnership; rather it's about safeguarding against coercion masquerading as compromise.

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

In this episode, I speak openly about the red flags of abusive relationships.

For anyone feeling entrapped or seeking support in such situations, remember there are resources available to help navigate these turbulent waters—reach out if needed because sometimes validation can be the first step towards unburdening oneself completely.

Red Flags Discussed:

1. Denial of Abuse
2. Manipulation
3. Self-Doubt
4. Recording Evidence
5. Victim Mentality
6. Resistance to Ending Relationship
7. Reaction Suppression
8. Guilt Tripping
9. Fear of Saying No/Enforcing Boundaries
10. Body Language Discrepancies
11. Sexual Coersion

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Courtney Gilmartin is at the forefront of advocating change within family courts through her organization New Jersey Protective Moms. On this episode, Courtney brings invaluable insights in navigating the Family Court System that resonate not just in New Jersey but across all states.

The term "protective mom" might be unfamiliar to some; it refers to mothers who fight tooth and nail within a legal system that often fails to safeguard them or their children against abusers adept at manipulating proceedings.

Courtney shed light on how domestic abuse isn’t always recognized by those entrusted with justice due to gaps in training regarding coercive control—a subtler form of abuse than physical violence yet equally damaging. 

Courtney has a wealth of information on her website: https://www.njprotectivemoms.org/

This is the resource list mentioned on the podcast:  https://www.njprotectivemoms.org/resources

Follow her on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/courtney.gilmartin/

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Gaslighting is an insidious form of mental manipulation where one person seeks to sow seeds of doubt in another individual’s mind. The goal? To make them question their own judgment, memories, and even sanity—essentially discrediting their sense of reality. This nefarious technique can be subtle or overt but always aims to destabilize the victim and gain psychological control over them. This episode unpacks Gaslighting a little further based on recent questions from listeners.

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Ben Taylor joins us again for an in-depth discussion on one of the most bewildering and painful aspects of narcissistic relationships: The Discard. In this episode, we define the Discard, discuss the various forms it can take, and try to understand the "why" behind it. Ben, a self aware Narcissist, helps us understand the complexity of The Discard and why IT IS NOT PERSONAL.

You can learn more about Ben here: https://www.rawmotivations.com/

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

When Dr. Gary Chapman introduced the concept of the Five Love Languages, many embraced it as a revolutionary way to enhance communication and intimacy within relationships. These languages – words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch – have helped countless couples express their affection more effectively. However, what happens when these love languages are used to control a partner? Today, we're unraveling how the Five Love Languages can be twisted by abusive partners. 

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

In today's episode, we delve into a profound concept known as "the Teddy Bear Effect," which provides insight into manipulative expectations within abusive relationships.

The "Teddy Bear Effect" stems from Patricia Evans' analogy in her book Controlling People. It's about how abusers create an unrealistic version of their partner, treating them as if they were a teddy bear - compliant and devoid of personal needs or feelings. This pretend relationship ignores the authentic person's identity and imposes unfair standards that serve only the abuser's sense of control.

Key points discussed include:

• The non-reciprocal nature of abusive relationships where expectations are one-sided.
• How controllers project their own narrative onto their partners, ignoring true emotions and reactions.
• The damaging impact on victims who feel unseen and unappreciated for who they truly are.

Here are the two books mentioned on the podcast:
Controlling People
The Verbally Abusive Relationship

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Are you struggling to figure out what is going on in your relationship? In this episode, I unpack emotional immaturity and its connection to abusive behaviors in relationships. 

Key Points Discussed:

• Self-Doubt vs. Self-Work: Many individuals question their sanity due to others not doing their work; it's essential for everyone to examine their behavior.
• Emotional Maturity Misconceptions: Smart or successful people can still be emotionally immature; intelligence does not equate to maturity.
• Signs of Emotional Immaturity: Lack of boundaries, difficulty with conflict resolution, inability to regulate emotions appropriately – these traits often present themselves subtly at first but are indicative of deeper issues.
• Impact Over Intentions: The true measure is not what was intended but the actual impact a person's actions have on others.
• Empathy Deficit: A lack of empathy can lead an emotionally immature individual to justify harmful behaviors without considering others' feelings.
• Boundary Respect & Resolution Skills: Healthy relationships require respected boundaries and mature conflict resolution – something emotionally immature individuals struggle with.
• Patterns vs. Moments: Distinguishing between occasional moments versus consistent patterns is critical when assessing someone’s emotional maturity level.

Cycle of Abuse: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1916632/10300770

Support the show

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner