What You'll Learn

Referenced in this episode:

In this podcast episode, Alana reflects on her graduate school experience and provides updates on their podcast. She discusses her initial exposure to Murray Bowen's model of Bowen theory as she delves into her own personal discoveries about differentiation in therapy. Alana shares how she struggled with maintaining her identity while emotionally connecting with others, highlighting the concept of differentiation.

The episode emphasizes the importance of differentiation in healthy relationships by allowing individuals to preserve their identity while remaining emotionally connected to their partner. We learn that differentiation enhances emotional resilience, improves conflict resolution, and prevents emotional fusion/enmeshment. Alana emphasizes the importance of healthy boundaries and the ability to navigate the challenges of long-term relationships while dispelling misconceptions about detachment.

Want to book a session with Choose Recovery Services?

Go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com

Believing In You Coaching Program With Amie Woolsey

More from Choose Recovery Services

Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.

Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction. 

Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.



⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠ - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.

Do you find yourself saying, “I’m fine” when you’re not? Join Amie and Alana as they explore why we try to convince ourselves and others that we are okay when we’re actually struggling. Get ready to dig deeper into what your “I’m fine” response is really trying to communicate.

Listen to learn:

Referenced in this episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.

Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction. 

Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.



⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠ - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Empowered Divorce Podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with us on Social Media:

Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C

Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee

Choose Recovery Services

Do you spend endless hours trying to diagnose your partner and obsessing over their intentions and motivations? In this week's episode, Amie and Alana are giving you permission to stop overanalyzing your partner and to shift the focus back to yourself. You'll walk away feeling empowered, with insight into where to direct your energy during your recovery journey.

Tune in to learn:

Referenced in this episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.

Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction. 

Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.



⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠ - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Empowered Divorce Podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with us on Social Media:

Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C

Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee

Choose Recovery Services

Betrayal is painful enough, but what if your partner uses their recovery against you? This week we dive into the complicated dynamics of betrayers weaponizing their healing. Join Amie and Alana as they explore the nuances of weaponizing recovery work including what it is, how to spot it, why it happens, and how you can protect yourself. 

*BIG disclaimer with this topic - weaponizing can go both ways, and this episode is not intended to be used against your partner either. 

Listen to learn: 

Referenced in this episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.

Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction. 

Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.



⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠ - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Empowered Divorce Podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with us on Social Media:

Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C

Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee

Choose Recovery Services

Join Alana Gordon and Hali Roderick as we talk about the need for men to gain the skill set on how to help their wife heal after betrayal if they want relational healing. If you would like to learn more about the Help Her Heal Course, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com.

Help Her Heal for Men with Hali Roderick

⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/help-her-heal/⁠

We are starting a new group called Help Her Heal, that teaches men about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. This group will offer resources modeled after the work of Carol Juergenson Sheets to help men rebuild lost trust and create intimacy. This group will begin September 11th, 2023, and will be held weekly on Mondays at 7:30pm MT. 

Other Upcoming Groups

Healing Hearts for Couples

https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/healing-hearts/

Stephanie Hamby is starting a new course called Healing Hearts that offers a comprehensive program for couples in early recovery, focusing on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues. This course will allow couples to learn more about emotions, communication, boundaries, and how to address underlying issues. It starts on October 1st, and will be held weekly on Sundays at 5pm MT.

Empowerment After Betrayal for Men https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/empowerment-after-betrayal-men/

We are offering a support group for men who have been betrayed as we have noticed a lack of resources for men with this experience. This weekly, 90-minute support group will allow men to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while surrounding themselves in a supportive community. This group, Empowerment After Betrayal, will meet Mondays at 6pm MT.

Choose Healing for Betrayed Women https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/choose-healing-betrayal-trauma-support-for-women/

We are excited to offer more support to betrayed women with a free 6-week group, Choose Healing for Betrayed Women that serves as a helpful "first aid" for those who have just begun to navigate the difficult experience of betrayal trauma. This group meets weekly for 90 minutes, and we have multiple groups and coaches to fit different situations and preferences.

Social Media

Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/chooserecoveryservices/⁠

Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/ChooseRecoveryServices⁠

YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@chooserecoveryservices⁠

Helpful Links

Website: ⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/⁠

Meet the Coaches: ⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/team/⁠

Group Programs: ⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/groups-2/⁠

Courses: ⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/courses-2/⁠

Webinars: ⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/webinars/⁠

“It is time to define betrayal violence.” That is the message that our guest, Hope Ray, wants to offer today. Hope is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, and a Certified Hope and Freedom Practitioner. Listen to hear how Hope uses the term “betrayal violence” and how she feels those powerful words give a more thorough definition of the experience of betrayed partners.

In this episode you will learn:

Referenced in this episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

⁠Choose Healing⁠- Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 6 weeks.

⁠Help Her Heal ⁠for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain skills to begin healing a broken relationship.

⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠- Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

⁠Choose 90 for Men⁠- Support group for men who are ready to take the first step toward recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Choose 180 for Men⁠- This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Choose 360 for Men⁠- Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Road to Recovery⁠- Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Choosing to Stay Webinar- Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Should I Stay or Should I Go?⁠- Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠- Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Empowered Divorce Podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with us on Social Media:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amie Woolsey⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alana Gordon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - MFTIntern, CCPS-C

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Choose Recovery Services⁠⁠⁠

Last week we learned about the important role our nervous system plays in regulating our bodies. This week Amie and Alana are here to continue that conversation and to give you practical, tangible things you can do right now to help engage and relax your central nervous system. 

Tune in to learn:

Referenced in this episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

⁠Choose Healing⁠ - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks.

⁠Help Her Heal ⁠for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. 

⁠Empowerment After Betrayal for Men⁠ - Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.

⁠Choose 90 for Men⁠ - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Choose 180 for Men⁠ - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠

⁠Choose 360 for Men⁠ - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Road to Recovery⁠ - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Choosing to Stay Webinar ⁠- Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠

⁠Should I Stay or Should I Go?⁠ - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠ - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Empowered Divorce Podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with us on Social Media:

We are excited to welcome Psychotherapist and Betrayal Navigation Coach, KayLee Dunn, to this week’s episode of Choose to Be. KayLee talks through the brain science behind trauma and will help you better understand your body’s survival responses and how to turn them into your superpower. With relatable personal examples, relevant research, and empathy for your experience, this is a valuable episode you won’t want to miss!

Listen to Learn:

Mentioned in this Episode:

More from Choose Recovery Services

Connect with us on Social Media:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amie Woolsey⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alana Gordon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - MFTIntern, CCPS-C

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Choose Recovery Services⁠⁠⁠

Many women suffering from betrayal not only emotionally detach from their partners, but they also detach from themselves. In preparation for next week’s episode with Mental Health Therapist, KayLee Dunn, Amie and Alana wanted to give you some ideas to think about, sit with, and journal on around the topic of emotional detachment. Listen to learn how you may be using emotional detachment as a coping mechanism while working through the devastating effects of betrayal.

Tune in to learn:

Referenced in this episode:

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👮 Do you find yourself policing your partner, feeling the need to repeatedly check their phone, their whereabouts, and their actions? First, this is NORMAL after betrayal, and second, this isn’t a place you want to stay long term. There ARE ways to let go of these habits in a way that will move you from feeling powerless to empowered. Amie and Alana break down the whys of hypervigilance as they encourage you to get curious about some of your behaviors after betrayal.

Tune in to learn:

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Alana’s Blog Post on Hypervigilance

Podcast Episode: How Can I Tell the Difference Between Trauma and Intuition?

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