Molly Millwood joins the podcast today as our first author in our first ever book club. If you have read her incredible book To Have and To Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma...you know how powerful her message is. We both consider this a must read book for every new mama as we found it to be a life changing book. It is both freeing and validating for women in the throes of one of life’s biggest transitions: motherhood.

Special takeaways: 

• Resentment for our partners are generally formed around unrealistic expectations 
• The goal of being a “good enough” mother
• The inequities between men and women when it comes to parenting are real
• Giving voice around fear, depletion, longing and hunger will win over passive aggressive communication every time
• A man’s ability to accept influence from their partner is directly related to marital stability
• Seeking professional therapy should be normalized and we could all benefit from it

Resources:

Molly’s book: To Have and to Hold

Molly’s Website: www.MollyMillwood.com

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET MOLLY: instagram.com/molly.millwood.phd/
MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Our husbands are back on this week’s episode and we go through some of our hardest challenges and conversations that we’ve experienced in our relationships to date. Skeletons come out of the closet and seasons of contention are brought to the forefront, this was not an easy episode to record. But, we think it’s important because we know others might be in their hard season right now. You are not alone. We’re hoping you might be able to pull a tip or two to help propel your relationship forward. Thanks to our guys for coming on and providing the male perspective again. 

Resources:

The Five Love Languages

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Relationships take work. Period. And good relationships are worth putting the time and energy into. Progress over perfection is key to creating a relationship that two unique people can both enjoy but we all know that some advice is better than others. We give our honest thoughts on some of the common advice we have all heard and share what we’ve really found helpful.

Abby’s Takeaways

1. Just because he does it differently, doesn’t make it wrong
2. His opinions matter too

Amy’s Takeaways

1. Learn how to argue
2. Realize that you’re different people and lean into it

We will have our husbands back on next week to dig into these further and also give their take on growing in a relationship.

Resources:

Love Unending

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

As first time moms, we both struggled. BIG issues for us were the preconceived notions of what it was supposed to look like and comparing everything from how our body looked to how we nurtured our kids. Our culture looks at motherhood with rose colored glasses and idealizes the experience. Only when we’re willing to open up and get honest, can we support each other by affirming that some of motherhood is just REALLY hard. This is what the episode is made to do. 

Asking for help, self-care, and keeping your adult relationships front of mind are all ways to help in these isolating times. Some situations may need the care of a professional and we want to NORMALIZE that. We hope the words and experiences are supportive and validating for you in whatever motherhood season you’re in.

References:

American Pregnancy Association Stats

The Marriage Lab

Bowling Green University Stats on Divorce 

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

“The only thing to do is move forward, that’s it, it really is that simple”. In this guest interview with Kate Lemere, we cover everything from fitness and nutrition to vaginal healing and baby blues. Kate’s take on common terms like “letting yourself go” and the question of “am I the only one going through this” is not only inspiring but extremely validating for women in every walk of life. Her message is clear, remove the urgency, the expectations, the extremes and we can tackle any goal that serves us. In a month where we many times turn to quick fixes and detoxes, simple habits and daily choices will win in the long run every time.

References:

The Four Percent Blog

Barry’s Boot Camp

Atomic Habits

Organ Prolapse and Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy 

Let’s connect!

MEET KATE LEMERE: https://www.instagram.com/katelemere/?hl=en

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Teddy Roosevelt said it best: “comparison is the thief of joy”. We can instantly go from feeling great about our life to feeling mediocre if we start comparing. Often nothing has actually changed about your situation, you just went out and found that someone else’s Instagram life looks better. Comparison can lead to lust and envy and doesn’t lead to the contentment and gratefulness we’re seeking. 

There will always be shinier rings, bigger houses, clearer skin, and unique skills that other people are showcasing. But don’t think that she also doesn’t struggle. We all have the ability to filter and we all have the behind the scenes mess even if all we are showing is our center stage.

So, let’s grow together. We open up about where we struggle with comparison and what has helped us along the way. 

References:

Girl Code

Raising Good Humans

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Hindsight is 2020. If you could go back in time and tell your younger self 3 things what would they be?

1. You don’t have to find your husband in college
2. To get through things, you have to stop avoiding and actually get through them
3. Not everyone gets an opinion on your life

xo,  Amy

1. The plan for your life may change
2. Enjoy the journey
3. It’s okay to ask for help

xo, Abby

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

In this episode we bring our husbands on to give real responses to the questions we all have as women. If you want tangible tips from husbands/dads who open up right from the start… grab your headphones! These two tell all on dividing household tasks, entering parenthood, and that 3-letter-bad-word we refer to as “nag” and how to ditch it for good.

It was really important to us that our first guests would be our husbands, because they are a big part of our story. Drew and Colin have been in each of our lives for about a decade and have seen us through some of the best and worst of times. They will be frequent guests on the HERself Podcast so head on over to our Instagram link below and let us know what else you want to hear!

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Body image. It sure is a  j o u r n e y! Research shows that issues surrounding how a person views their body can go back to as early as age 4 and our parents and household can make a BIG impact. Most of us will struggle with our body confidence at one time or another, but there are ways to get to a more confident place. 

This week we dig in to where Abby still struggles from her former, fuller figure and how Amy has overcome many of the common habits and thoughts that seep into a person’s mind. Listen in, we’re sure you’ll be able to relate to one or both of us. 

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com

Welcome to the HERself Podcast! Amy and Abby here and we are SO glad you have joined. 

In episode 1, we dive into a series of questions. Our responses will help you get to know us on a deeper level and also articulate just how open and honest these episodes will be. What is your greatest body insecurity? What debt do you have? What makes you feel sexy? Jot down your answers as we open up the real conversations that will help you get one step ahead of where you are now. 

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

HERSELF SHOWNOTES: www.herselfpodcast.com