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By Heather Gray, LICSW
5
140140 ratings
The podcast currently has 83 episodes available.
Sometimes, in your effort to heal and understand everything that has happened to you, healing takes over, overwhelms, causes you to flood and risks you becoming too much for the people who love you. Healing, well, it’s a lot and we don’t like to talk about this part.
Healing is often portrayed as a smooth journey, but the reality can be quite different. We discuss how intense emotions can surface and how they impact our relationships with others, especially when we feel overwhelmed.
Join us as we explore:
Healing requires patience and self-compassion; it’s okay to take up space in your healing journey.
Open, transparent communication is crucial in maintaining healthy relationships while navigating your healing process.
You don’t have to do it alone. Join Tuesday Group.
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things.
This week, we’re returning to the complexities that come with healing from family estrangement. We know the devastating impact of manipulative relationships with narcissistic and emotionally limited mothers. One of the hardest parts of this journey is acceptance and today, we’re giving that our focus.
Acceptance paves the way for healing and there are strategies you can use to make this process easier.
Join the Conversation:
Consider this your standing invitation to join Tuesday Group
If you want to share your Mayhem story, find me at: [email protected]
Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review if you enjoy the show!
Also mentioned:
Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things
This week, we’re putting the spotlight on "Little t Trauma". We’re talking about how seemingly minor comments from your mothers can accumulate over time, affecting your self-worth and impacting your emotional well-being.
Little t traumas, or "papercuts," are not insignificant. Healing begins with recognition, boundary-setting, and reaffirming your self-worth.
Come find us in group
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things
We’re diving into triangulation—when your mother pulls you into conflicts and pits you against your father, siblings, or even extended family. If you’ve ever felt like you were caught in the middle, unsure of who to trust or what’s real, listen in.
We’re talking about how narcissistic and emotionally limited mothers use triangulation to control and manipulate family dynamics, and more importantly, how you can start recognizing these toxic patterns and reclaim your truth.
In this episode, we cover:
What triangulation is and how it shows up in family dynamics
How to honor your truth and set healthy boundaries with your mother
Practical examples of boundary-setting and self-validation
Steps you can take today to start healing from these painful patterns
If this resonates with you, and you’re ready for more support, I’d love for you to join Tuesday Group, where Mayhem daughters come together to work through these exact challenges. You don’t have to go through this alone—let’s navigate it together. You can find more details and sign up through the link in the show notes.
And here you go: Affirmations that Honor Your Truth
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things
Today, we’re talking about the complex and often unspoken experiences of those of you whose lives began with pain on the day they were born. Through a powerful listener story, we explore the impact of early trauma and the lasting effects it can have on your life.
We’re talking about the importance of understanding and healing from these early wounds.
Understanding Early Trauma: We unpack what it means to navigate life when your story begins with pain and how this shapes one’s identity.
The Freeze State: Discover what the freeze state is, how it manifests in daily life, and the importance of recognizing it in ourselves.
Dissociation and Sensitivity: Learn about the common experiences of feeling disconnected and how sensitivity can influence interactions and self-perception.
Don’t forget to consider Tuesday Group for additional support in your healing journey.
Mentioned in the show:
Sarah Baldwin Coaching
Sarah's You Make Sense Podcast on Apple
Dr. Peter Levine
Dr. Stephen Porges
Also mentioned in the show: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things: Scripts that help you navigate the hard conversation you might encounter in life, love, or work.
The holidays are here again, with all their big feelings and challenges.
Whether you're preparing for emotional manipulation or feeling the weight of grief, I’m here to support you.
To help you plan for the holidays ahead, I revisit our conversation from last year’s episode, "Mayhem and Mistletoe." Instead of repeating the same insights, I’m sharing this encore presentation to remind you of important strategies for creating a fulfilling holiday experience.
Recommended Journal Reflection: As you begin to plan the holidays for yourselves this year, I encourage you to reflect on this as your first step:If you could create the perfect holiday for yourself, with all things being equal…after all, your mother is always going to be narcissistic, what is the holiday you would design for yourself? Who would you need to be to have that kind of holiday? What would you have to do to preserve that kind of holiday?
Take your time with this prompt and create a clear picture of the holidays you wish to experience. This clarity will help you make decisions, communicate your needs, and set boundaries effectively.
Remember, you’re not alone in navigating this season. If you have questions unique to your holidays, send them in. I will cover them in future Friday chats from now until the holidays.
Email me: [email protected]
If group support during this time sounds nice, here’s the link to join.
This week on Mayhem, we dive deep into the journey of discovering, knowing, and owning your true self after childhoods marked by maternal neglect and abuse.
I’m exploring with you what it means to live authentically and how to reconnect with the parts of yourself you may have lost in the wake of emotional neglect or people-pleasing patterns.
You'll learn how to break free from survival mode and start expressing your real personality, even when it's challenging.
Plus, don’t miss the free PDF of journal prompts to help you explore your authentic self further.
If you're ready for more support, join Tuesday Group where we dive into these topics as a community.
If you’re hurting, I’d really like to help. In this quick chat, I’m talking about the impact of childhood trauma and how we can navigate this journey together. You don’t have to go it alone, and I want to share some ways we can connect more deeply.
For Massachusetts residents: Therapy Inquiry
Schedule a Mayhem Consultation
Join Tuesday Group
Email your questions or stories: [email protected]
This week, we’re diving deep into the heavy, but important, topic of shame.
For many daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers, shame can feel like a constant companion, sneaking in when you least expect it and clouding your sense of self-worth. But shame doesn’t have to define you.
We’ll explore why shame shows up, how it differs from guilt, and the damaging effects of a shame spiral. More importantly, I’ll walk you through practical steps to interrupt the spiral.
We’ll challenge those negative thoughts, and begin the path toward self-compassion and healing. You’ll learn how to connect to the truth that your worth is not determined by your mistakes or what anyone else thinks of you.
Join the Conversation in Tuesday Group: If today’s episode resonates and you’re looking for a supportive space to explore these topics further, Tuesday Group is open for you.
In this episode of Mother Mayhem, I dive into a topic that will hit home with a lot of you: dealing with mean girls in adulthood. Meet Thelma and Louise, who bring their own struggles with a mean girl to the table.
I’ll be talking about how the impact of narcissistic abuse can make encounters with bullies even more triggering and difficult to handle.
You’ll hear practical ways to navigate these relationships and how to reclaim your sense of self and empowerment with clear communication and firm boundaries.
If today’s discussion hits home, remember that Tuesday Group is here to support you in processing these experiences and moving forward. We meet every Tuesday at noon PST, and you can find the link to join in the show notes.
Join a supportive community where you can talk through these challenges with others who get it.
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things, a resource I created to help you navigate the hard lessons in life, love, and work,
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