No Visible Bruises

At this time of year, it's common to feel discouraged if we haven't made progress on our goals. Even though we may want to take action, something within us may be holding us back. In this episode, we'll explore the internal barriers that prevent us from reaching our goals and provide strategies for overcoming them and building momentum.

What you will learn in this episode:

• Strategies for getting unstuck and making progress
• What protector parts are and how to utilize these internal resources for personal growth
• Tools for maintaining emotional independence in the face of external influences

Ten years ago, I was trapped in narcissistic abuse and felt like there was no way out. But now, I know that it's possible to have an amazing life after recovery. One of the things that helped me get on the path to recovery was learning to listen to my mind and body. We all have different parts of ourselves - some that want to stay in, others that want to go out. Some parts that make us feel disgusted with ourselves and others that love us. It's important to understand why we have these different parts of ourselves, because even the "bad" parts are there with loving intent. In this episode, I'll share how to read the "bad" parts and see how they're trying to protect you, as well as how to make sure the "good" parts are with you more often.

Resources:

• Sign up for my FREE Masterclass on Attachment Styles of the Narcissist on Sunday 15th January 2022: https://carolinestrawson.showit.site/attachment-styles
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson 
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Welcome to the start of a new year and a new beginning! In this episode, I’m focusing on how to kickstart your journey to a happier and healthier 2023. We know that time alone doesn't heal all wounds, so I’m going to be sharing a bottom-up approach to healing that empowers you to take control of your own recovery. You'll learn about the most powerful methods of self-healing and some tools and tactics to help you on your journey. 

What you will learn in this episode:

• How you can join me for FREE and kickstart your 2023 healing journey
• Why we need to heal from a bottom-up approach instead of a top-down approach
• How the most powerful method of healing comes from within

If you’re ready to start the new year off on the right foot and leave the narcissist behind, join me for a 3-Day FREE New Year, New You, No Narcissist Bootcamp starting on January 9th! During this Bootcamp, I'll be sharing my post-traumatic growth trifecta and my trauma-informed practice with positive psychology to help you not just survive, but thrive. We'll be exploring exercises, tools, and tactics to help you get 2023 off to a great start so you can step into post-traumatic growth. Sign up now at https://carolinestrawson.com/bootcamp and let's start this new year together!

Resources:

• Join my FREE 2023 Bootcamp: https://carolinestrawson.com/bootcamp
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson 
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Today we are joined by Houa Utech, a Trauma-Informed Coach and advocate who specializes in working with women recovering from betrayal trauma, covert narcissistic abuse, divorce, and post-separation abuse. Houa has a background in social work and has spent time volunteering in domestic violence shelters, but it wasn't until she experienced abuse in her own relationship that she fully understood the impact of this type of abuse.

A glimpse into what you’ll learn in this episode:

• The manipulative tactics of narcissists, how they use fake empathy to achieve their goals
• Distinguishing narcissistic abuse from unhealthy relationships
• How to find the right support and identify a helpful professional

Houa has made it her mission to bring awareness, education, and healing resources to individuals, families, organizations, and communities, as she believes that abuse and trauma are often misunderstood, misdiagnosed, and disregarded. We’ll also delve into the flawed family court system and the efforts being made by Houa, based on her personal experience, to support those navigating this process. Houa will have her own podcast soon, This Emboldened Life, which aims to offer education, resources, survivor stories, and a sense of community for women who have experienced covert narcissistic abuse, betrayal trauma, and abuse by professionals in the family court system.

Connect with Houa:

• Email: [email protected]
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/houa_utech/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/houautech

Resources:

• The Unseen Wounds of Women: https://www.lulu.com/shop/houa-utech/the-unseen-wounds-of-women/paperback/product-n4dqnp.html?page=1&pageSize=4
• Become an Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coach: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/NTICC3
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

In this episode, we are joined by Andrea Humeniuk, a narcissistic abuse specialist who helps women recover and thrive after narcissistic trauma and domestic abuse. Andrea shares her own story of dealing with narcissistic abuse and being the parent of a special needs child. She offers guidance and support to other women who have experienced similar trauma, helping them build resilience and find a life they never thought was possible. I hope my discussion with Andrea helps you on your own journey to recovery.

A glimpse into what you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why you can’t blame yourself for the behaviour of a narcissist
• The challenges and joys of raising a special needs child and what you can do to make parenting rewarding for both you and your child.
• How to feel like you have a sense of worth in this world after suffering narcissistic abuse

Andrea also emphasizes the importance of trusting your intuition and not blaming yourself for the actions of others, especially narcissists. Additionally, she discusses the struggles parents of special needs children often face and offers advice for those in similar situations. I strongly suggest connecting with Andrea if you are currently dealing with narcissistic abuse, trying to recover from trauma, or are on the journey of raising a child with special needs.

Connect with Andrea:

• Email: [email protected]
• Website: https://mamashealingtraumas.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mamashealingtraumas/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mamashealingtraumas

Resources:

• Become an Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coach: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/NTICC3
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson 
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Welcome back to the podcast! Before we dive into the Q & A section, I want to give you all a HUGE thank you, we just passed 3 million downloads for the podcast and I’m so grateful for every single one of you. My main purpose in life is to help and support those of you who are suffering from narcissistic abuse and help you heal, so I’m grateful that this podcast has reached so many people and I hope it’s helped some of you!

But as it’s the first Tuesday of the month, it’s this month's "Ask Me Anything" where I get to answer the questions you’ve been sending in! In the AMA section, I have decided to focus on one question, as I believe it’s so important that it needs a whole episode to discuss it. That question is “How do I move forward with my life? I just feel so numb.” 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• What functional freeze is and how to get “unfrozen”
• How to read your emotions and discover what your body is telling you
• The science of how our nervous system reacts to abuse and creates trauma
• How to transition from a freeze response and get back into feeling “normal”

My aim for these episodes is to make sure I’m discussing topics that directly impact you, so I hope my answers help you in a strong recovery from narcissistic abuse. Every first Tuesday of each month is an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to [email protected] where we will endeavour to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode!

Resources:

• Join Thrivers, my low-cost monthly healing membership: https://carolinestrawson.com/thrivers
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson

It’s almost Christmas time again and the holiday season is starting to get into its swing! Because of the rapidly approaching festive season, I want to share with you how to cope with the narcissist over the next month as it’s very common for the narcissist to ramp up their aggressiveness at this time of the year. From dealing with Christmas dinners with a narcissist to who has the kids for certain events, the holiday season can be really demanding for those who have to deal with a narcissist, so listen in so you can learn how you can cope over the holidays. 

What you will learn in this episode:

• How to minimize the time you spend with a narcissist over the holidays
• Ways to stop the narcissist from getting their supply 
• The traps narcissists will set under the guise of holiday spirit

I’ll also discuss how to set up a new communication method if you need to communicate with a narcissistic person without letting them back into your life. I hope this episode helps you prepare and plan for a great holiday time and helps you stop the narcissist in their tracks so they can’t ruin your festivities.

Resources:

• Join Thrivers, my low-cost monthly healing membership: https://carolinestrawson.com/thrivers
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Noshiela Maqsood is a mum of 5 children. She is a 3× best selling author, Master Coach, and NLP Trainer. She empowers Muslim women to heal their inner wounds and become generational change-makers. Escaping a prison sentence taught her about her self-worth, boundaries, and how much she needed to make her mental and emotional well-being a priority. She quit being a people pleaser and started saying yes to herself! After her own healing journey, overcoming depression and anxiety, she committed herself to helping women find the light within themselves. She has helped women around the world heal their inner wounds and has helped many start their own coaching businesses. She is determined to spread her message of empowering women far and wide.

A glimpse into what you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why many Muslim women are struggling with trauma
• What rejection wounds are
• How to find self-acceptance

Noshiela is in my high-performance healing mastermind and her mission is so powerful that I knew I had to have her on the podcast. In this episode, we discuss how Muslim women are treated in their culture and how it leads to many women having trauma, and what Noshiela is doing to change this. We’ll learn about Noshiela’s upbringing and how it influences her life today and how the Muslim family environment influenced Noshiela’s view on the world and on her own healing. We’ll also discuss how our own self-talk can determine our own beliefs and how to get out of a negative mindset and into a recovery and healing mindset.

Connect with Noshiela:

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/noshiela
• Noshiela’s Coaching: https://www.noshielanoorcoaching.co.uk
• She Empowers Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B09PV6C4LK
• Free Facebook Group: "The Empowered Muslimah; Heal from Emotional Trauma to Thrive With Purpose" https://www.facebook.com/groups/1029110910583276/?ref=share

Resources:

• Become an Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coach: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/NTICC3
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson 
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

If you are in a relationship with a narcissist and are looking to leave and go through the family court system or you’re currently in that court system, you MUST listen to this episode. Today's guest is Tina Swithin. Tina is the author of Divorcing a Narcissist (4-part series), founder of One Mom’s Battle, and creator of Family Court Awareness Month. She is also a founding member of the National Safe Parents Organization. Tina Swithin acted as her own attorney in a custody case that spanned six years and during this time, her children were repeatedly placed in harm's way. Tina was successful in terminating her ex-husband’s parental rights and while she is considered one of the “lucky ones,” however, for anyone to hear her story and deem her as lucky speaks volumes about the brokenness of the system. Tina works to raise awareness of the issues in the family court system and to educate the general public on post-separation abuse and narcissistic abuse.

A glimpse into what you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why the family court system is broken and how to navigate it
• How to deal with post-separation abuse
• Ways to bring more awareness to narcissistic abuse

You’ll hear Tina’s story of her experience with a narcissistic partner and the hurdles she had to jump over to go through the family court system, which has now led her to become an advocate for bringing awareness to post-separation abuse and the broken family court system. I decided to release this episode in the month of November, as November is Family Court Awareness Month, a movement that Tina created to shine a light on how broken court systems are around the world. 

Connect with Tina and learn more about bringing awareness to the broken court system:

• One Mom’s Battle Website: https://www.onemomsbattle.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onemomsbattle
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onemomsbattle/
• Tina’s Amazon Page: https://www.amazon.com.au/Tina-Swithin/e/B00IR0KRSK/
• Family Court Awareness Month: https://familycourtawarenessmonth.org/
• Pink Fireworks: https://www.pinkfireworks.com

Resources:

• Become an Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coach: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/NTICC3
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson 
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

I’m SO excited to welcome Dr. Mark Grixti onto the show this week to discuss what Brainspotting is and how it has helped people heal from narcissistic abuse and trauma. Mark is a psychologist, author, fellow podcast host, and the head of Brainspotting UK. Mark and I work collaboratively on my trauma-informed & narcissistic trauma-informed certifications where Mark does an internal Brainspotting training with us. I can’t wait for you to listen to this episode as I truly believe that Brainspotting and the work it does can help hundreds of thousands of people dealing with trauma. 

A glimpse into what you’ll learn in this episode:

• What Brainspotting is and why it’s a great treatment for trauma 
• How to stop suppressing our emotions and start expressing them
• Tools to interconnect with others and use relationships to heal

In this episode, we discuss everything from what exactly Brainspotting is, why it’s a great treatment for trauma, and how Mark uses it in his practice, to how our brains have the capacity to heal built in and how we can tap into that natural response. Mark will go into detail about how Brainspotting uses our visual systems as a method of healing and why we need to stop suppressing our emotions and start expressing them. Near the end of the episode, we do a deep dive into how important relationships are, whether family, friends, or partners. We’ll discover the physiological epigenetic responses we gain from relationships and how to nurture healthy connections with others. 

Connect with Mark:

• Check for upcoming Brainspotting training here: https://www.bspuk.co.uk/upcoming-training/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/brainspottinguk
• Awe in Trauma podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/awe-in-trauma/id1580294433?i=1000543054793
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/BrainspottingUK
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brainspotting_uk/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-wfQEAwQX3qr36zkhh9J0g

Resources:

• Become an Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coach: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/NTICC3
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson
• My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Today’s episode is this month's "Ask Me Anything" where I get to answer the questions you’ve been sending in! In the AMA section of this episode, I discuss topics ranging from discovering a more definitive way of diagnosing a narcissist to how trauma can build up and eventually turn a person into a narcissist. I’ll also discuss why a narcissist will never apologise and take ownership of their actions and my stories of how my narcissistic ex-husband gained narcissistic supply by showing fake empathy.

If you’re listening to this at the start of November ‘22, make sure you join my FREE "Inside The Mindset of a Narcissist" Masterclass on Sunday, 6th November! You can sign up here: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/masterclass

Questions in this episode include:

• Am I the narcissist?
• Why does a narcissist never apologise?
• If someone shows empathy, does this mean they can't be a narcissist?

My aim for these episodes is to make sure I’m discussing topics that directly impact you, so I hope my answers help you in a strong recovery from narcissistic abuse. Every first Tuesday of each month is an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to [email protected] where we will endeavor to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode!

Resources:

• Join my FREE "Inside The Mindset of a Narcissist" Masterclass on Sunday, 6th November: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/masterclass
• Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
• Access my low-cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
• Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
• Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson