Dear Dr. Tracy

Parachuting into Motherhood: Finding your Identity as a Step Mom


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Step moms seem to get a bad rap in movies - even cast in a poor light and labeled "Evil Stepmothers."

In reality, stepmothers are human beings parachuted into co parenting arrangements they had no part in making.

It can feel like fitting a circle peg into a square-shaped hole. You might be told you aren't a 'real' mother and in the same breath criticized for not being involved enough.

No one hands you instructions on how to be a stepmother and there sure isn't a one-size-fits-all approach.

In this episode, I sit down with Jamie Scrimgeour, a Life Coach specializing in Stepfamily Dynamics and the creator of The Exclusive Stepmom Community. We discuss her experience with becoming a stepmother and how her identity has changed since then.

Jamie Scrimgeour is a mom of one and a stepmom of three with kids ranging in ages from 6-18. Jamie creates raw, real, and relatable digital content about all things parenting, step-parenting, entrepreneurship, and living a KICK-ASS Life. She is also the host of The Jamie Scrimgeour Podcast. With candidness and humor, Jamie uses her personal and professional experience to support woman in living their best life. 

In this episode, we discuss the following:

  • Jamie’s journey to becoming a step mom, as well as having a baby with a partner who already has children
  • The role of perfectionism and control that gets in the way of connecting with ourselves and our families
  • The stigmas and negative beliefs others have of step moms (and how this is different from step dads)
  • Setting boundaries when there are so many demands and hats to wear
  • Managing transition days and keeping a calendar
  • Navigating challenges, boundaries, and growth in your relationship as you navigate what it means to be a blended family
  • Shifting into acceptance and your identity as a step mom
  • Now it’s your turn! Join me over on Instagram, or leave me a note here about your experience as a step mom.

    What’s Coming Next?

    My next episode is with Eve Rodsky, author of Fair Play, where we will talk all about the mental load and creating balance in your relationship

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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