Teach Me How To Adult

By Gillian BernerBusiness Health & Fitness Mental Health Education Self-Improvement Careers

Teach Me How To Adult episodes

October 05 ICYMI: Feeling Numb? Understanding Functional Freeze, and Polyvagal Theory As A Framework For Healing, with Beatriz Victoria Albina
Do you ever feel numb, like you're sleep-walking through life in zombie mode? You might be in functional freeze. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed.
We're diving into polyvagal theory, how to recognize when you’re stuck in functional freeze (a lot of people are!), and how to use somatic tools and nervous system mapping to heal both your mind and body. If you're looking to effectively regulate your nervous system, overcome dissociative tendencies, and feel present in your life, this is a must-listen.
We’re joined by Beatriz Victoria Albina, NP, MPH, SEP, a Family Nurse Practitioner, Somatic Experiencing and Breathwork Practitioner, and Master Certified Somatic Life Coach. Bea unpacks the hidden cost of emotional outsourcing™, AKA the survival habit of looking to others for validation, self-worth, and emotional regulation, instead of tuning into yourself.
Listen to the full episode with Bea here.
Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.
Follow Bea's Instagram and podcast.
Buy Bea's book End Emotional Outsourcing!

For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
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teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
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11 min
September 30We're Back! Kick Off Season 6 With 6 Questions To Get Clear On Your Priorities, Identity & Who You’re Becoming
We're baaaaack! Season 6 is here, we've rebranded, and we’re going deeper.
I'm so excited to share everything we have in store this season — it's going to be less about finding the “right” answers, and more about asking better questions.
We’re talking about self-discovery, relationships, identity, change and uncertainty, health, purpose, communication, and what it actually means to build a life that feels like your own.
I'm kicking things off by sharing the mini identity crisis I had this summer about how I'm showing up in the world, if the way I'm spending my time is aligned with the person I want to be, and the questions I explored to reflect on how I want to move forward.
So today, I’m sharing six prompts to help you gain clarity and insight into how you want to live, where you are right now, and what might have gotten lost along the way.
Tune in to explore:
How do I want to be remembered? Is there a gap between the person you want to be and how you're actually showing up?
Who are you when no one is looking? Do you like the person you are when you’re alone and no one is watching?
What version of yourself do you miss? What parts of your younger self might be worth reconnecting with?
What will you miss about this chapter of your life? How can remembering that your current life will eventually become a memory help you appreciate the present?
What is your insecurity trying to tell you? Are insecurity, envy, and comparison clues that you’re living out of alignment or self-abandoning?
What stories are you still telling yourself? And what would happen if you started gathering evidence that those stories aren’t necessarily true?
This episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reverse-engineer your life around these potent questions. Grab a journal, take a walk, or discuss these prompts with someone you love. You might discover something you already knew but had forgotten.
Welcome to Season 6. I’m so happy you’re here!

For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
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@gillian.berner
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14 min
July 22 Announcement: Summer Break And Season 6 Updates
A quick update to let you know we're taking a summer break from the podcast — we’ll be back with SEASON 6 in September!
I'm so excited to share what's in store for Season 6... we have lots of exciting updates, a new look and feel, and deeper convos with brilliant and thoughtful guests.
In the meantime, you can stay up-to-date by subscribing to the show on YouTube and Spotify to watch all the episodes... leaving a review really is such a helpful way to support the show so I can keep making this every week!
And if you haven’t subscribed to my Substack, it would mean the world if you did. I’ll be posting more writing and insights there in the coming weeks.
Thank you guys for tuning in to season 5 and being a part of this amazing community.
If you have any topics or guest suggestions that you’d love to hear in season 6, please send me a message or DM. I love hearing from you!
I hope you all find time for whimsy, community, and the hobbies that light you up this summer.
See you in September!
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@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
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5 min
July 15The Psychology of Whimsy: Maybe Life Doesn’t Suck… Maybe You Just Need Whimsymaxxing
Finally… a happiness habit that actually works. Whimsymaxxing is everywhere right now, and for good reason. But this is more than just another internet trend… the vitality of whimsy reflects something much deeper about what so many of us are craving.
In this episode, we're exploring the psychology of whimsy, why adults desperately need more play, wonder, novelty, creativity, and delight, and why intentionally romanticizing your life can improve your mental health, resilience, and overall wellbeing.
In a world obsessed with productivity, optimization, and hustle culture, whimsy is becoming an act of rebellion. A much-needed pendulum swing away from over-optimizing, biohacking, irreverence, and minimalism. Whimsy is an act of hope and joy against the seriousness of adulthood and the uncertainty of current times.
And it’s more than just vibes… whimsy is a measurable psychological strength associated with greater life satisfaction, stronger relationships, improved resilience, and lower symptoms of depression. Even more good news: it’s not a fixed trait. Research shows playfulness can be learned and developed.
So whether you're feeling burnt out, stuck in autopilot, or wanting to reconnect with childhood joy, this episode will inspire you to reclaim the magic of life in small, meaningful ways.
Tune in to hear about:
Why whimsymaxxing is becoming one of the biggest trends

The psychology of whimsy, playfulness, and wonder

How romanticizing your life can improve happiness and mental health

Why novelty activates dopamine and makes life feel richer and more memorable

The surprising research on adult playfulness and resilience

The power of nostalgia and reconnecting with childhood joy

How to break out of autopilot and make everyday life feel magical again

15 easy ways to add more whimsy, creativity, adventure, and play into your life this summer
Let’s savour every sunset, dilly dally our days away, and spend the summer being wildly impractical and frivolous.
For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
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24 min
July 13 ICYMI: How To Be Indispensable In An AI World (And How Authentic Should You REALLY Be At Work?!), with Emily The Recruiter
How do we make ourselves indispensable in a workforce where we're constantly being replaced? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed.
In this uncertain job market, the things that make you uniquely you — like your ideas, communication skills and emotional intelligence — are becoming increasingly important for career success. So we're throwing it back to this helpful advice from Emily The Recruiter on how to incorporate AI into your job to stand out, and the soft skills that will make you irreplaceable in the current market. Plus, Emily myth-busts how much of our authentic self we should actually bring to work.
Emily Durham—aka Emily the Recruiter—is a career coach, content creator, and host of the Clock In Podcast. With millions of views across TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube, Emily is known for her no-BS advice on how to land your dream job and deal with workplace dynamics like a boss.xn
Listen to the full episode with Emily The Recruiter here.
Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.
Check out our first episode with Emily here.
Follow Emily on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
Subscribe on YouTube

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
8 min
July 08How To Stay In Love: Top Divorce Lawyer On Why Marriages Fail & The Habits That Save Relationships, with James Sexton
More than half of marriages end in divorce… so why do we still choose to tie the knot?
In this episode we get profound relationship advice from a perspective you might not expect… a world-renowned divorce lawyer and authority on relationships. Because there’s a lot that we can reverse engineer from someone who has spent their career witnessing endings.
We're joined by James Sexton, America's top divorce lawyer, and bestselling author of How to Stay in Love and How Not To Fuck Up Your Marriage. After more than 20 years helping couples navigate the end of their marriages, James has rare insight into what actually causes relationships to fail, and how we can build stronger, healthier, lasting love before the start.
We cover the real reason people divorce, the biggest mistakes that end marriages, what the red flags are that a relationship might be unsalvageable, emotional disconnection and the toxicity of social media for couples, and advice for anyone about to get married.
In this moving conversation, we also explore the deeper philosophy of grief and impermanence, and what we can learn about building more connected relationships from someone who has witnessed a lifetime of endings.
Whether you're dating, engaged, married, navigating relationship challenges, or simply want to become a better partner, this episode is packed with practical relationship advice that every couple (and anyone hoping to get married one day) should hear.
Tune in to hear:
The main causes of divorce after 20+ years in family law

How we “lose the plot” in relationships

The red flags that a relationship is breaking down or beyond repair

Why couples’ connections “go bankrupt slowly, then all at once"

James Sexton’s "Hit Send Now" philosophy for honest communication

Check-in rituals and habits to stay connected and avoid drifting

Why couples experience different versions of the same relationship (we’re unreliable narrators!)

How social media can be damaging in modern relationships

What grief work and divorce law taught James about love, gratitude, and impermanence

The most important advice James gives to anyone about to get married
Follow James:
https://www.instagram.com/nycdivorcelawyer/?hl=en
https://www.youtube.com/@sextonshow/videos
https://www.nycdivorces.com/
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
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1 hr 2 min
July 06 ICYMI: How Fear Can Be The #1 Relationship Killer, with Trevor Hanson
How do we choose love over fear when relationships get hard? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.
This advice from Trevor Hanson will guide you through common communication landmines, why fear is the #1 killer of relationships, and how to move through fear by accessing our primary emotions and communicating without self-protection.
I’m joined by Trevor Hanson, a marriage and family therapist who has helped thousands of individuals and couples heal attachment wounds and build secure, connected, confident relationships. His work has been featured by the Gottman Institute, and he’s the founder of The Art of Healing, where he teaches frameworks for transforming insecurity into emotional safety.
Listen to our full episode with Trevor here.
Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.
Follow Trevor on Instagram
Trevor's website: https://theartofhealingbytrevor.com
For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
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8 min
July 01Why Your Social Biome Shapes Your Happiness: Build Stronger Friendships This Summer | Rerelease
What if this summer was your most social summer ever?
We desperately need connection. Loneliness impacts your body, mood, longevity and emotional health, and as we turn to technology more and more for all our needs, we risk missing the social interactions that fuel us. So today we're throwing it back to the concept of the “social biome” — your personal ecosystem of relationships and daily interactions — and how it can enrich your life.
Founded by researchers Dr. Jeffrey Hall and Dr. Andy Merolla, the social biome is a framework for strengthening relationships and cultivating a real sense of community in a culture that’s starved of real life connection.
If you're craving more genuine relationships and social connection this summer, these doable strategies can help you build your social biome and connections.
Tune in to learn:
Why connection is “social nutrition” and how to feed your social health every day.

The Ladder of Connection framework to move from restorative solitude to strong, meaningful friendships.

How small, low-stakes interactions (“weak ties”) boost your mood and help you feel less isolated.

Using social media and technology as a way to connect rather than compare and consume.

Practical tips to actually make friends as an adult, nurture existing bonds, and create a supportive community.
For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
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24 min
June 29 ICYMI: Give Better Feedback In The Bedroom (And In Our Relationships): A Script For Communicating Preferences, Boundaries, and Needs, with Darshana Avila
How do we communicate our needs in a way that doesn't feel like criticism? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.
Expressing our true desires, communicating what actually makes us feel good or safe, and dialling into our preferences and needs can be vulnerable territory with a partner... but it's a powerful path to intimacy when done with care. So we're throwing it back to this masterclass in feedback, communication, and relating more intimately with Darshana Avila.
Darshana is a trauma-informed somatic sex educator and Erotic Wholeness coach who has dedicated her career to helping people tune in to their truth, desires, and authentic relationships. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop, and she’s spent over a decade guiding people out of the cultural patterns that keep them stuck.
Listen to our full episode with Darshana here.
Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.
Follow Darshana on her website and Instagram.
For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
@teachmehowtoadultmedia
@gillian.berner
Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult
Subscribe on YouTube

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11 min
June 24How To Feel More Empowered & Confident: The Psychology of Personal Power + Locus of Control | The Quickie
Do you feel like you're in the driver's seat of your life, or does it feel like life is just happening to you?
Empowered people have an infectious confidence and energy, and a lot of that personal agency comes down to a powerful concept in psychology: locus of control.
Do our choices, habits, and actions shape our future? Or are we at the mercy of luck, circumstances, other people, and forces beyond our control? Your answer has a major impact on your confidence, resilience, motivation, mental health, relationships, success, and optimism.
In this episode, we unpack the difference between an internal locus of control and an external locus of control, why some people feel empowered while others feel stuck, and how our childhood experiences, upbringing, and life circumstances can shape the stories we tell ourselves about what's possible.
Tune in to hear:
What the concept of locus of control is in psychology

The difference between an internal vs. external locus of control

Why locus of control influences confidence, resilience, happiness, motivation, and success

The connection between external locus of control and anxiety/depression/stress

How high performers often develop a stronger sense of personal agency

How childhood experiences, parenting styles, and socioeconomic circumstances shape our beliefs

Why your locus of control may differ across areas of your life

Strategies to feel more empowered and build confidence in your abilities
Whether you're navigating anxiety, building self-confidence, or trying to feel more empowered in your life, this is a powerful framework for understanding how your mindset shapes your reality.
I believe in you!!
For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.
Subscribe to my Substack:
teachmehowtoadult.substack.com
Follow us on the ‘gram:
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@gillian.berner
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18 min

About Teach Me How To Adult

From the publisher's feed

On Teach Me How To Adult, we tackle the deep questions that help us know ourselves, and each other, a little better… how do we have better conversations? How do we grow together in our relationships, instead of apart? How do we stay optimistic when the world is a dumpster fire? Are we really in a loneliness epidemic? How do we cultivate more awe? Why are everyone’s hormones so out of whack? Is everyone having more sex than me?