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One thing we know for certain is that our kids will go through things. They’ll have a crisis of identity, of faith, of social status. They’ll be overwhelmed. They’ll be confused. They’ll have questions. They’ll doubt themselves.
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On this weekend episode of the Daily Dad, Ryan talks with one of his favorite writers Austin Kleon on Parenting strategies before and after writing a book, and Creativity within your household.
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We know that our kids want to feel good, feel safe, feel loved. We know they want to feel that someone is proud of them, that they’re talented, that they’re worth something. We also know that they’ll want to have fun, take risks, mess up, be crazy, and feel the pleasures of the world.
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It matters far less what a person does in life than how they do it. An exploitative corporate executive might have an expense account and a fancy title, but we all admire the hardworking and selfless teacher more. And we certainly acknowledge that, whatever the differences in salary, one contributes far more to society.
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Unless you are currently in line for a hereditary throne, it’s unlikely your children will ever be a king or a queen. This is a good thing, as it seems like both a thankless and toxic job–to say nothing of its effectiveness as a form of government.
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Few of us felt completely understood as kids. At a young age, our parents didn’t quite understand what we were saying, what we wanted, how much we missed them when they were gone, how scared we were when we were alone. When we got older, they didn’t seem to remember just how hard it was to be a teenager, how overwhelming the world was, how different we felt from others, how behind we sometimes felt (as we wrote recently). And now as adults, we struggle too–maybe our spouse doesn’t fully get us. Maybe our parents are incapable of seeing or listening to us when we try to communicate about wounds we carry from the past.
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We put our family first. That’s what we believe. That’s what we say. That’s the first commandment in the Daily Stoic Parenting Challenge. That’s the advice we give other parents. That’s effectively what we tell our kids too: You’re the most important thing in the world to me.
And then almost every single day, in countless ways, we fail to live up to those words.
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Happy Father’s Day to everyone!
It’s pretty incredible how concise Marcus Aurelius is throughout Meditations. There are nearly 500 passages throughout, and rarely is a passage longer than a few sentences.
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On this weekend episode of the Daily Dad, Ryan talks with his wife Samantha on setting our kids and ourselves up for success, creating space by doing less and building the confidence to remain consistent.
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The point is not to get good grades. The point is not a good score on their SATs. It’s not about what college they get into. College is not about what kind of job they can snag. Success in school is not succeeding in school.
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