3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms

I have spent so much time, energy, and money over the years trying to get good at the things I am simply not good at. Routines are my big one. I am not great at keeping our home organized and running on any kind of rhythm, and there have been whole seasons where I decided that fixing that about myself was the most important work I could possibly be doing.

Now, there's nothing wrong with striving to be better, and I am fully on board with growth, but we all have a finite amount of energy, and every hour I spend hyper-focusing on a weakness is an hour I don't get to spend magnifying the things that make me who I am.

This is the second episode in my back-to-school check-in series for moms, six short episodes walking you through the six principles of self-assured motherhood, each one with a concrete way to assess how you're actually doing.

Today's principle is Celebrate Your Strengths, and I love teaching about this because I love giving every woman permission to acknowledge and celebrate her innate gifts and strengths. When you stop trying to be a well-rounded version of everyone else and start leaning into what you naturally do well, your growth in that area becomes exponential, your joy goes up, and your family gets the very best of you instead of a watered-down imitation of somebody else's mothering.

In this episode, you'll hear:

💛 The Olympic gymnast who competed in exactly one event, and why his coaches wanted it that way

💛 A question about baseball from a Harvard Business Review article that I share with every woman in my Self-Assured Motherhood program

💛 The answer one of my kids gave in the car one summer that made me so grateful I had leaned into my strength that day instead of apologizing for everything I'm not

You have gifts that nobody else can bring to your family in quite the way you can, and I hope this school year is the one where you spend your energy magnifying those, rather than apologizing for all the rest.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

Want to know how you're doing across all six principles of self-assured motherhood? Take the free interactive quiz at 3in30podcast.com/quiz. You'll get a clear picture of where you're thriving and where you could use more support, and you'll be added to the info list for my Self-Assured Motherhood program, which opens for enrollment on September 14th with a special discount for quiz-takers.

Related Episodes:

436: Embrace the Mom You Are—Not the One You Think You Should Be // Julie Bastedo

315: A Word from our SAM Sisters

314: How to Feel like Yourself in Motherhood // Aleisha McKean

Episode Sponsors:

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

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***

It's back-to-school season, and our kids are about to be assessed on their reading, their math, and their writing. But what if we gave ourselves an assessment for how we're doing as moms? (And I don't mean a test involving balancing equations... I would rather not know my score for that. 😬) Instead, we can assess ourselves on our emotional wellbeing, because that affects everything about motherhood.

And so I've created a mini series to give us exactly that.In this mini series, there will be six short episodes that walk you through each of my six principles of Self-Assured Motherhood. These are the six areas that make the biggest difference in your joy, your peace, and your emotional wellbeing, and knowing where you stand in each one shows you where you're already doing well and where you could use more support.

Today, we are starting with my first principle: Voice Your Values. This is my favorite principle in the framework, and the one I put first because everything else rests on it.

In this episode you'll hear:

✨ The two dictionary definitions of "values," and which definition we're talking about here.

✨ The five cards my husband handed me during a values activity at a couples retreat, because they explained a dream of his that had been a mystery to me for years.

✨ The green, yellow, and red definitions I read straight from my workbook, so you can figure out which one describes you right now.

You can take my free self-assessment to see exactly where you stand in all six areas — go to 3in30podcast.com/quiz or click the link in the show notes.

As you head into the back-to-school season with your kids, I hope you'll take some time to assess where you're at in your own growth and happiness. These six principles are a great place to start.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

Enrollment for the Self-Assured Motherhood Program opens September 14th. Take our Quiz and you will be added to the info list, so you will hear first when the doors open.

Related Episodes:

375: 3 Ways Voicing Your Values will Help Lighten your Mental Load // Rachel Nielson on the Happy Mom Summit

388: What a Spaghetti Dinner Taught Me About Teaching // 3 Reasons the SAM Program REALLY Works

389: I'm a Seasoned Mom. Is SAM for me? // Wanda Opitz, SAM Alumni

Podcast Sponsors:

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Zenni: Go to zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for fifteen percent off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over sixty five dollars.

Let's Connect!

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***

I have never been much of a meditator. Sitting cross-legged on my bedroom floor, waiting for my brain to go quiet, has never once worked for me. I'm too in my head, too cerebral, too prone to just thinking harder instead of actually feeling calmer.

So when I recorded this episode, I wasn't expecting to walk away from it more relaxed than I've felt in weeks. But that's exactly what happened.This week's guest is Layne Burkette, a licensed therapist who specializes in somatic and nervous system work.If you're heading into back-to-school season already feeling the overwhelm creep in, this conversation will give you real tools, not one more thing to add to your plate.

In this episode, you'll hear:

🌿 A sixty-second practice you can do standing at the sink, in the carpool line, or anywhere else your day already has you

🌿 The one sentence that reframes everything about why you snap before you even realize you're upset

🌿 The moment Layne had me try something I've avoided my entire life (and why it actually worked)

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

FREE RESET: Feel Calm in Minutes by accessing Layne's quick nervous system resets.

Related Episodes:

129: Rethinking Meditation as a Busy Mom // Dr. Leah Weiss

483: Types of Support that Every Mom Needs

407: A Two-Minute Daily Practice to Transform Your Mental Health

Episode Sponsors:

AirDoctor: Head to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code 3IN30 to get $250 off select AirDoctor air purifiers, including the 3500, 4000, and 5500 models.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Zenni: Go to zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for fifteen percent off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over sixty five dollars.

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***

If the back-to-school season is already creeping up on you (the supply lists, the new routines, the mental math of who needs to be where and when), you are not the only mom feeling that low hum of stress. Every year it sneaks up faster than I expect it to, and every year I tell myself this is the year I'll feel ready. And... I never quite do. (Maybe you can relate! 😆)

So today I'm handing the mic to three of my favorite people to talk this through with: Abby, our Finance Director, Emily, our Marketing Director, and Christy, our Operations Director. Each of them is going to walk us through how one of their core values is shaping a real decision or mindset shift they're making this back-to-school season. These aren't Pinterest-perfect systems, but they are an honest look at what's actually working for them right now.

Whatever season of motherhood you're in, however many kids or what ages, there's a good chance one of their stories will feel a little like your own, and might just help you lead this season with more intention and a lot more peace. Some of what you'll hear includes:

🍎 Why Abby decided she's done fighting her kids over Chromebooks, and what she's trying instead

🍎 The "black trash bag energy" Emily admits she brings to every new school year (and why she's doing something different this time)

🍎 The line Christy's mom used on her as a kid that she still thinks about decades later

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

If this conversation has you wondering what your own core values actually are, our Self-Assured Motherhood quiz is a great place to start. It only takes a couple of minutes and gives you a real starting point for where to focus your energy this season. Take it at 3in30podcast.com/quiz.

Related Episodes:

478: What Every Mom of a Teenager Needs to Hear // Emily Ricks

449: 3 Simple Strategies to Prevent After-School Meltdowns // Alyssa Blask Campbell

306: Creating Back-to-School Routines for a Smooth Transition // Mika Perry

Podcast Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Zenni: Go to zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for fifteen percent off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over sixty five dollars.

Let's Connect!

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***

With back-to-school season right around the corner, I keep thinking about a moment from my own high school years – a moment so small I barely registered it at the time. I noticed a kid sitting alone, stuck out my hand, and said hi. That was it. What I didn't know was that it would change his life, and honestly, mine too.

This is a re-air of one of my favorite episodes from the archives, originally recorded as an interview I did on the podcast Becoming for Teens. I'm bringing it back now because our schools need more kids brave enough to look up, reach out, and make someone feel like they belong. And the truth is, so do our communities.

You'll come away from this one thinking about:

💜 The letter Brian wrote me at graduation, and what he said about that first handshake

💜 Why the kindest thing you can do might feel awkward or forced at first (and why that's okay)

💜 The small but specific things teens (and moms!) can do to make someone feel seen

This episode is worth listening to with your kids on a family night, in the car, or anytime when they're a captive audience. I think it'll spark a conversation you'll both remember.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcement:

Take the free Self-Assured Motherhood Quiz — it walks you through six key areas of motherhood and shows you where you're already doing well and where you could use a little more support. It takes about three minutes.

Related Episodes:

445: How to Set Boundaries without Damaging Relationships // Rachel on Happy Mom Summit

429: How Ordinary Moms Can Make a Difference // Sharon McMahon

419: 3 Things Moms of Children with Disabilities Want You to Know // Katie Blackburn

Episode Sponsors:

AirDoctor: Head to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code 3IN30 to get $250 off select AirDoctor air purifiers, including the 3500, 4000, and 5500 models.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Fodzyme (KiwiBiosciences): We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to ICanEatAgain.com/3IN30. Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Let's Connect!

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***

Lately, my kids have been watching a lot of TV. More than I'd like to admit. And for a while, I let myself spiral about it. What kind of mom lets her kids zone out on screens all day? What is that doing to them? But then I caught myself, because I've learned that there's a difference between self-confronting and shame-spiraling. And, once I stopped the shame-spiral, I reminded myself that our family is going through a hard time right now, and if some extra screens are going to support us through it, that's not the end of the world. What our home needs most right now is compassion. My kids need an extra dose of compassion, and so do I. That's what gets us through hard times.

This week's episode is a recording from a small group coaching call I did back in 2019, with about twenty women who were in the thick of hard seasons with their kids. We talk about how to support your kids through struggles, and how you can support yourself, too.

In this episode, you'll hear:

💜 What one woman in the group said about being grateful she had a really hard firstborn

💜 Why one mom realized that worrying about what her in-laws thought of her parenting was actually getting in the way of what her kids needed most

💜 The concept of "shark music," and how the soundtrack playing in your head during your kid's meltdown might be making everything harder than it has to be

If you or your kids are in a hard season right now, I hope this episode can give you some support.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

Wondering where to start on your journey to Self-Assured Motherhood? We created a free three-minute assessment at 3in30podcast.com/quiz that shows you exactly where you are across all six principles, including Support Their Struggles, the principle at the heart of this episode.

Related Episodes:

357: Tips for Staying Calm During Your Big Kid's Big Meltdowns // Cheryl Cardall

440: Tools for Parenting a "Spicy" Child // Mary Van Geffen

449: 3 Simple Strategies to Prevent After-School Meltdowns // Alyssa Blask Campbell

Episode Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Fodzyme (KiwiBiosciences): We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to ICanEatAgain.com/3IN30. Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Let's Connect!

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***

Grief has been close to my family lately, and in the weeks since losing my brother-in-law Logan, I've found myself returning again and again to the memories that hold the people we love, long after they're no longer here.

This July 14th marks twenty-three years since my mother passed away from breast cancer. I was nineteen years old. And this episode (one of the most personal I've ever recorded) is my tribute to her.

My mom had a gift for seeing strengths in her children before they could see them in themselves — and for my mom, helping me find my voice, quite literally, was one of the most loving things she ever did for me. This episode is a musical tribute because music is where she first showed me who I was.

In it, you'll hear about

🎵 The nights my mom stayed up late making eight gorgeous costumes for me, and how those long hours spent together shaped me

🎵 What she said to me on the morning of July 14th, just a few hours before she passed

🎵 How my mom intentionally helped me see my strengths when I was an insecure seventh grade girl

This episode is about grief, yes, but it's also a celebration. It's a celebration of how my mom helped me find myself, and how her love is still shaping me today.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

One of the greatest gifts my mom gave me was helping me know my own strengths. If you're wondering how well you're doing at knowing and celebrating yours, we have a free three-minute quiz waiting for you at 3in30podcast.com/quiz — it will give you a visual snapshot of where you're thriving in your self-assured motherhood journey and where there might be a little room to grow.

Related Episodes:

390: Living with Grief without Losing Yourself // Shelby Quinlan

472: When the World Feels Heavy, Try This // Shannan Martin

104: How to Move Through Grief towards Joy // Anna Packard

Episode Sponsors:

AirDoctor: Head to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code 3IN30 to get $300, plus a three-year warranty.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Fodzyme (KiwiBiosciences): We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to ICanEatAgain.com/3IN30. Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Let's Connect!

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

I have been a writer my whole life. Long before this podcast existed, writing was how I made sense of my hardest seasons, how I figured out what I actually thought and felt, and how I slowly found my way through pain I didn't know how to carry any other way.

Some of that writing happened in therapy. And some of the most important pages I ever filled were written during my recovery from an eating disorder.In this episode, I share three of those pieces: an essay I posted on my personal blog, a narrative therapy piece my counselor guided me through, and a letter I wrote to my own body. Together, they trace a journey from desperation to hope to something that finally, finally felt like peace.

In this episode, you'll hear me share:

✍️ What my counselor asked me to write that cracked something open in me, and why I think anyone doing hard inner work should try it

✍️ The running path conversation that changed everything

✍️ The letter to my body I was sure would come out angry — and what came out instead

This is soul care in its most honest, vulnerable form. I hope something in this episode gives you permission to honor your own needs and do deep, healing soul-care.

Note: This episode contains references to faith and prayer as part of my personal healing journey.

For full show notes, click here.

***

Announcements:

⁉️ Curious how well you're honoring your own needs as a mom? Take my free three-minute assessment at 3in30podcast.com/quiz.

Related Episodes:

480: How to Stop Letting Your Body Image Steal Your Summer // Dr. Lexie Kite

481: What to Do When Your Child Says "I'm Fat" // Steph Wood

302: How to Heal Your Relationship with Food // Natalie Shay

Episode Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Fodzyme (KiwiBiosciences): We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to

ICanEatAgain.com/3IN30. Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

K12 Powered Schools: See how K12 Powered Schools can help unlock your child's full potential. Enroll online today at K12.com/3in30.

Let's Connect!

Join me on Instagram!

Get weekly-ish emails with BTS of my life

Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

I'm a word person. (Occupational hazard of spending years as an English teacher, I suppose.) I notice when words shift — when something that used to feel simple and clear starts carrying extra weight, or gets claimed by one group of people until the rest of us feel uncertain about whether we're still allowed to use it the way we always meant to.

That's what's happened, at least in my experience, to the word "patriotic." And more than my own discomfort, I started to feel genuinely unsure how to teach my kids how to be patriotic in a country that often feels so divided by partisan politics.

That question is exactly what brought Sharon McMahon back to 3 in 30. Sharon is known as America's Government Teacher and is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Small and the Mighty and her new children's book, We Are Mighty.

This conversation will give you language and a framework for the patriotism conversations you've been wanting to have with your kids, but haven't quite known how to start.

🇺🇸 Why loving your country and criticizing your country are not opposites

🇺🇸 Why narrating your small acts of service out loud shapes how your child understands what it means to love their neighbors — and their country

🇺🇸 Why getting your child to the polls just three times in a row may be one of the most lasting things you ever do for democracy

With the 4th of July coming up this week, and especially this year as we celebrate the 250th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence, we hope you find this conversation helpful.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Related Episodes:

429: How Ordinary Moms Can Make a Difference // Sharon McMahon

392: How to Have Grace-Filled Political Conversations with Family & Friends // Sarah Stewart Holland & Beth Silvers of Pantsuit Politics

031: Three Easy Ways to Teach Children the True Meaning of Patriotic Holidays // Brittany Richman and Andrea Reeve, The American Moms

Episode Sponsors:

Knix Teen: It's not just underwear; it's giving our girls the confidence they deserve. Go to KnixTeen.com and use code 3IN30 for 15 percent off.

Let's Connect!

Join me on Instagram!

Get weekly-ish emails with BTS of my life

Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

For years, I had a vision in my head of the kind of mom I was going to be. I would be present and patient. I would have snacks ready after school and summers full of creative activities. When I finally became a mom, I struggled to match the realities of the daily motherhood grind and the ideal images of motherhood I had in my head.

This week's guest is Amy Marie Hann, author of Master the Mundane. I asked Amy Marie to come on the show because of a Substack article of hers I read all about letting go of "shoulds." Amy Marie shares three big things she finally let go of and what opened up for her once she did.

✨ The difference between liking the idea of something and actually wanting to do it, and how to tell which one you're dealing with

✨ What changed when Amy Marie stopped trying to be the house all the kids wanted to be at

✨ How Amy Marie found a way to work that didn't require choosing between two extremes

If you've ever felt like you're forcing yourself into "shoulds" that don't quite match your reality, this one's for you.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

If this episode has you thinking about your own "shoulds," my course Motherhood Decluttered walks you through how to figure out what to keep and what to let go of — in a way that fits your life. Use code SUMMER through the end of June to get a 10% discount.

Related Episodes:

463: How to Let Go of Mom Guilt

473: How to Get Through a Busy Season

354: Letting Go of Heavy Expectations of Yourself // Sneak Peek from the Declutter Your Motherhood Audio Course

Episode Sponsors:

First Day: For a limited time only, our listeners are getting an insane deal. Use code 3IN30 to get up to 57% Off at FirstDay.com.

Knix Teen: It's not just underwear; it's giving our girls the confidence they deserve. Go to KnixTeen.com and use code 3IN30 for 15 percent off.

Quince: Head to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

Fodzyme (Kiwi Biosciences): We're so excited to partner with FODZYME and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to icaneatagain.com/3in30.com.

Let's Connect!

Join me on Instagram!

Get weekly-ish emails with BTS of my life

Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***